John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » The good news is that nearly every Trump property is now in range of North Korean ICBMs. Perhaps now he will do something about this [Scary]

Tuesday 28 November 23:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When stealing Teslas, get your stories straight, and don't drive past the cops in your stolen cars [Amusing]

Tuesday 28 November 23:05:21 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "There must be something about Indianapolis Waffle Houses' [Sappy]

Tuesday 28 November 22:45:05 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hero mom comes to the aid of a police officer who was trying to control two unruly passengers at the scene of a car crash. Florida: Two unruly toddlers [Florida]

Tuesday 28 November 21:50:04 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Challenge: Help Budweiser make their Mars Mission Patch even better [Photoshop]

Tuesday 28 November 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » More Sonic Attacks reported, even though Sega killed the franchise awhile ago [Weird]

Tuesday 28 November 20:50:04 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Another day, another unsafe intercept over the Black Sea. It's almost like a nation of upjumped peasants and fishermen with high technology isn't likely to be responsible with it [Obvious]

Tuesday 28 November 20:20:05 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [80 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New tests at the site of "Jesus' tomb" in Jerusalem confirm traditional beliefs that it was built in the 4th century by Romans [Interesting]

Tuesday 28 November 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [118 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In other news, North Korea has fired another ballistic missile as its war on the ocean continues [NewsFlash]

Tuesday 28 November 18:48:45 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [298 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sorry Yanks, but Meghan Markle's going to become a British citizen (but don't worry, we'll give you Piers Morgan in exchange) [Hero]

Tuesday 28 November 18:37:10 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [178 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Fierljeppen

Tuesday 28 November 18:25:32 UTC 2017

Since much of the Netherlands is below sea level, Dutch farmers needed a way to leap waterways to reach their various plots of land. Over time this evolved into a competitive sport, known as fierljeppen (“far leaping”) in which each contestant sprints to the water, seizes a 10-meter pole, and climbs it as it lurches forward over the channel. The … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Florida's favorite grocer now offers booze delivery. Florida headline futures skyrocket [Florida]

Tuesday 28 November 18:20:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In 1939 St. Louis was as polluted as Delhi or Beijing is today. Then the city cracked down on back alley coal peddlers [Interesting]

Tuesday 28 November 17:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And today's Darwin award goes to this man who accidentally killed himself after taking the pin out of a grenade and then posing to take a photo with it (graphic image warning) [Dumbass]

Tuesday 28 November 16:50:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [227 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you lost your boa constrictor near your Seattle bathroom, the Pacific Northwest Herpetological Society has it [News]

Tuesday 28 November 16:20:05 UTC 2017

News [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man accused of robbing gas station while armed with hand lotion [Fail]

Tuesday 28 November 14:50:04 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Lawyer busted for DUI goes full Gene Simmons in mugshot [Dumbass]

Tuesday 28 November 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pointy person [Photoshop]

Tuesday 28 November 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Do not tell your children that we are going to arrest them if they don't behave. Don't. Do. That. We are not going to arrest them if they are not behaving. We are not going to scare them for you. We just don't do that" [PSA]

Tuesday 28 November 13:50:04 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [150 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Museum of Failure will hopefully open on December 2nd, unless something goes wrong [Strange]

Tuesday 28 November 13:20:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teacher does drugs in front of students in her classroom. "She's in the corner, hiding with a chair and a book and what appears to be cocaine, putting it into lines" [Dumbass]

Tuesday 28 November 12:50:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [135 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Circulatory effects of trumpet playing

Tuesday 28 November 12:50:02 UTC 2017

"Circulatory Effects of Trumpet Playing" (British Medical Journal – 1959) details a self-experiment by a professional trumpet player to determine the best position in which to play the trumpet to avoid blacking out while playing high loud notes. He determines that laying down flat offers the most blackout protection.

Another curious detail from the article: his suggestion that trumpeters in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The weapons amnesty in Guernsey has been going well with the public handing in knives, hand guns, swords, a bat'leth, rifles…wait, what? [Strange]

Tuesday 28 November 12:14:01 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [93 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Music for Robots

Tuesday 28 November 11:13:00 UTC 2017

Early synth sounds from the legendary Forry. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » We regret to inform you that your son committed suicide. It was the only thing he could do after he was raped and murdered [Scary]

Tuesday 28 November 10:33:09 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [65 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » Languages Upon Which Arnold Schwarzenneger's Acting Career Was Built

Tuesday 28 November 9:10:00 UTC 2017

actors Arnold Schwarzenegger Governor language languages politics republican - 1735618816 LoL by: erik.mogan Tagged: actors , Arnold Schwarzenegger , Governor , language , languages , politics , republican Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Don't Think I Want to Live That Long

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:54 UTC 2017

100 aging infographic long life - 4854525440 Graph by: kasdbp100 Tagged: 100 , aging , infographic , long life Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Now They're On Backwards AND I Don't Know Which Setting to Use

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:48 UTC 2017

pie charts graphs funny underwear - 7494649600 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: pie charts , graphs , funny , underwear Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » That's the Important Stuff

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:47 UTC 2017

Harry Potter doctor who Pie Chart - 7857271040 Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: Harry Potter , doctor who , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Deadliest Shape

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:46 UTC 2017

best of week deadly disease geometry shape - 5445340672 Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , deadly , disease , geometry , shape Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » A Guide for Hunting Shiny Pokémon

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:45 UTC 2017

Pokémon pokeradar shinies guides - 7868669696 Submitted by: (via Yellowfur) Tagged: Pokémon , pokeradar , shinies , guides Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Music Memory

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:44 UTC 2017

Music memmory lyrics remember - 7701060864 Graph by: APShark Tagged: Music , memmory , lyrics , remember Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » People who drive SUVs

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:42 UTC 2017

carry cars children drive off roading Pie Chart soccer moms suv - 2510216448 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: carry , cars , children , drive , off roading , Pie Chart , soccer moms , suv Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Weasleys Get Poorer

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:39 UTC 2017

books gingers-cant-have-nice-things-like-souls Harry Potter Hogwarts movies Pie Chart sex the weasleys voldemort - 4496421888 Graph by: biggestharrypotterfans Tagged: books , gingers-cant-have-nice-things-like-~ , Harry Potter , Hogwarts , movies , Pie Chart , sex , the weasleys , voldemort Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Just Hope I Don't Find Them With my Feet

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:35 UTC 2017

building lost Pie Chart stepping on legos toys - 6541925120 Graph by: curtisgator523 Tagged: building , lost , Pie Chart , stepping on legos , toys Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Periodic Table of the Memeements

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:34 UTC 2017

infographic know your meme Memes periodic table - 4707399680 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: infographic , know your meme , Memes , periodic table Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things You Should Know When You're Moving Dead Body Parts

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:30 UTC 2017

Bar Graph garbage trash bags - 7910209792 Graph by: hannah.hadelman Tagged: Bar Graph , garbage , trash bags Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Choosing Classes In College

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:28 UTC 2017

school venn diagram - 7927891712 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: school , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » People Actually Like Candy Corn?

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:25 UTC 2017

candy chocolate halloween infographic - 5355750400 [polldaddy poll="5617434"] Graph by: Unknown Tagged: candy , chocolate , halloween , infographic Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Break ALL the Things!

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:22 UTC 2017

monkey wrench breaking things all the things video games - 6738729472 Graph by: Rurouni4Life Tagged: monkey wrench , breaking things , all the things , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » This Doesn't Get Better as You Get Older

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:20 UTC 2017

bar graphs crushes graphs funny - 7584443648 Graph by: SirShmink Tagged: bar graphs , crushes , graphs , funny Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » YAY GRAPH JAM!!!

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:19 UTC 2017

people graph jam no life - 4519267584 Graph by: Tagged: people , graph jam , no life Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things You See In An Episode of Star Trek

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:15 UTC 2017

Aliens Bar Graph bathrooms space Star Trek television transporter Travel weapons - 3655703296 Things You See In An Episode of Star Trek Graph by: Stl_Cardinals_Fan Tagged: Aliens , Bar Graph , bathrooms , space , Star Trek , television , transporter , Travel , weapons Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What Would I Do Without You?

Tuesday 28 November 9:09:12 UTC 2017

car alarms panic Pie Chart stealing - 6347980544 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: car alarms , panic , Pie Chart , stealing Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police pull over the Griswolds' car [Amusing]

Tuesday 28 November 9:07:09 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » USS Fitzgerald sustains damage from another ship…again [Followup]

Tuesday 28 November 8:22:25 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You've come a lung way, baby [Sick]

Tuesday 28 November 7:21:19 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Overdue

Tuesday 28 November 6:49:23 UTC 2017

Harry Houdini worked out a code with his wife, Bess, so that they could communicate during his performances: Pray = 1 = A
Answer = 2 = B
Say = 3 = C
Now = 4 = D
Tell = 5 = E
Please = 6 = F
Speak = 7 = G
Quickly = 8 = H
Look = … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Conservative group files frivolous lawsuit to disqualify Mueller, alleging "Mueller is not a man of integrity" like Trump is [News]

Tuesday 28 November 6:43:33 UTC 2017

News [link] [202 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man takes his love of heavy metal to extreme [Strange]

Tuesday 28 November 5:30:11 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Now that California has legalized recreational marijuana, one man is pushing for the state to become the first to decriminalize magic mushrooms [Cool]

Tuesday 28 November 4:05:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kim Jong Nam had two brown eyes contracted, third brown eye wide open [Awkward]

Tuesday 28 November 3:50:04 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It appears that ISIS has lost both their senior leadership AND the best minds in their propaganda department [Stupid]

Tuesday 28 November 3:44:04 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Honk if you love steak [Amusing]

Tuesday 28 November 3:20:04 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark-ready headline: Florida man accidentally shoots himself during road rage incident [Florida]

Tuesday 28 November 2:50:04 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » People driving while playing 'Pokémon Go' may have caused billions in damages in the U.S, tenfold increase in Darwin award recipients [Stupid]

Tuesday 28 November 2:30:47 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Four people have 144 more charges added to their string of break-ins. Gross [Dumbass]

Tuesday 28 November 2:20:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Here's a tip: Avoid 'sex games' that involve blindfolds and pruning shears [Obvious]

Tuesday 28 November 2:07:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Looks like Marshal Dillon will have to leave his six-shooter back at the condo when he goes clubbing on Miami Beach [Florida]

Tuesday 28 November 1:50:04 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you're in Lakeland, Florida, that smell of brimstone and ash isn't heralding the arrival of the prince of darkness. This time anyhow [Florida]

Tuesday 28 November 1:20:04 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Grandma got run over by a reindeer / Grandpa swore his vengeance through his tears / When he took that job with Norway's railroad / In retrospect, it was a bad idea [Sad]

Tuesday 28 November 1:06:06 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this flying flamethrower [Photoshop]

Tuesday 28 November 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Premature discharge leads to evacuation of NY mall [Scary]

Tuesday 28 November 0:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Tonight's Paul's Memory Bank (8PM EST) is 3 shows in one. Part 1 – I played with Shazam at a restaurant and made a playlist. Part 2 – a short tribute to recently passed entertainers. Part 3 – Rock & Roll HoF 2018 nominees in order of fan

Tuesday 28 November 0:30:04 UTC 2017

Live [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you lost your 10-day-old elephant it's been found and wrapped in blankets [Sappy]

Tuesday 28 November 0:20:04 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [23 comments] [Link]

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