John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Goodness gracious, great balls of fire [Scary]

Saturday 21 October 23:04:19 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Scissors cut paper, paper covers rock, rock foils car thieves [Facepalm]

Saturday 21 October 22:56:20 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Police rushed to the toy store after receiving a complaint that a red Lego Ninja was violating a ban on wearing face coverings" [Asinine]

Saturday 21 October 22:45:33 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Don't let strippers in your house" [PSA]

Saturday 21 October 21:13:03 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [161 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this fall leaf [Photoshop]

Saturday 21 October 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There's a very fine line between living in a house that's cluttered and being a hoarder, so pick up that excess crap and throw it away [Obvious]

Saturday 21 October 19:15:31 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [171 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ICE agents enter private property without warrant or permission and arrest an individual. Yes, you better believe some people have a problem with that [Scary]

Saturday 21 October 18:39:06 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [236 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guy brought back to life by favorite sports team's chant played at his bedside. Either that or improved medically after his brain surgery (possible nsfw content on page) [Unlikely]

Saturday 21 October 18:28:43 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pro-tip: If you use your dad's cop car to commit armed robbery, pick a victim who doesn't know you [Florida]

Saturday 21 October 18:04:13 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The best wine to drink with your Halloween candy [Weird]

Saturday 21 October 17:58:50 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mile High Club with stewardesses provided for first class. Economy class still provides complimentary beatings [Giggity]

Saturday 21 October 17:13:31 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police looking for a hairy-handed gent, who ran amok in Kent. Investigation to move to Mayfair [Scary]

Saturday 21 October 16:24:01 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Father of the year candidate sold heroin in a hospital maternity ward where he was visiting his newborn daughter [Dumbass]

Saturday 21 October 16:09:41 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 50 years ago, a guy got photographed while burning his draft card, had his face printed on a "Fark the Draft" poster, and ended up expanding our First Amendment rights. Today he explains what it was like to be a meme before the Internet exist

Saturday 21 October 15:23:17 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Tombvertising

Saturday 21 October 14:07:00 UTC 2017

Back in 2002, computer game maker Acclaim Entertainment announced that it planned to advertise its newest game, ShadowMan2, by paying families for the right to place small billboards on gravestones. The amount paid would be proportional to how visible and well-placed the gravestone was. The company suggested that its scheme might "particularly interest poorer families."

It doesn't seem that anyone ever … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You earn a special kind of karma if you give a tired iguana lost at sea a ride back home on the paddle of your kayak [Cool]

Saturday 21 October 13:34:17 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » LAN party in Tokyo [News]

Saturday 21 October 13:14:44 UTC 2017

News [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you were hoping to finally read all those soon-to-be-declassified JFK assassination files… wait, there's breaking news (link updated) [Followup]

Saturday 21 October 13:02:35 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [155 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop theme: Ivanka Trump's "punk phase" (link goes to historical evidence) [Photoshop]

Saturday 21 October 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Substitute teacher duct tapes mouths of 10 students. Not surprisingly someone has a problem with this [Dumbass]

Saturday 21 October 12:08:00 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [94 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When it comes to the upcoming winter forecast across America, who are you going to believe: Accuweather or the Farmer's Almanac? [Interesting]

Saturday 21 October 12:05:01 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » How a blind raccoon helped two kittens find their forever home just in time for Caturday [Caturday]

Saturday 21 October 12:00:00 UTC 2017

Caturday [link] [780 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » The Carsony Brothers

Saturday 21 October 11:56:42 UTC 2017

An unjustly forgotten trio of acrobats.

Full film below.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Protip: If you're going to break into a store and empty the cash register, don't leave your wallet with your photo ID behind [PSA]

Saturday 21 October 11:51:08 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [9 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If the "police" call asking you to bail your friend out of jail with iTunes cards, you should know there's just a slight chance it's not an entirely legitimate request [Facepalm]

Saturday 21 October 10:08:33 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [58 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » Untitled

Saturday 21 October 9:01:54 UTC 2017

creepy kid education insane school smart - 1495304448 LoL by: Unknown Tagged: creepy kid , education , insane , school , smart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » She's Got a Huge… Personality

Saturday 21 October 9:01:53 UTC 2017

best of week boyfriend girls knockers personality Pie Chart - 5673326336 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , boyfriend , girls , knockers , personality , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » So Intense.

Saturday 21 October 9:01:51 UTC 2017

double rainbow Pie Chart yosemitebear - 3943776256 Graph by: seexiaotong Tagged: double rainbow , Pie Chart , yosemitebear Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why Does That Guy Have the Word 'Fap' All Around Him?

Saturday 21 October 9:01:50 UTC 2017

fapping parents Pie Chart suggestive - 5544694528 Graph by: TheWarrior Tagged: fapping , parents , Pie Chart , suggestive Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Food Chain

Saturday 21 October 9:01:48 UTC 2017

animals food humans plants zombie - 1708910336 LoL by: kojak Tagged: animals , food , humans , plants , zombie Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things The Dog Eats

Saturday 21 October 9:01:47 UTC 2017

animals chairs dogs food garbage legs people shoes vomit - 1959723264 LoL by: meeka27 Tagged: animals , chairs , dogs , food , garbage , legs , people , shoes , vomit Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Cycle of Manliness

Saturday 21 October 9:01:46 UTC 2017

chest hair cycle girlfriends manly - 6202867456 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: chest hair , cycle , girlfriends , manly Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » No Way They'll Fall Out of Style

Saturday 21 October 9:01:45 UTC 2017

apocalypse bottle caps currency fallout nuclear war Pie Chart style - 4234112000 Graph by: Ora Tagged: apocalypse , bottle caps , currency , fallout , nuclear war , Pie Chart , style Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I'm Hungry?

Saturday 21 October 9:01:43 UTC 2017

classroom loud noises Pie Chart school stomach tummy - 5038781184 I don't even know what those noises are about most of the time. I'm pretty sure my stomach just wants to embarrass me. Graph by: loserme1 Tagged: classroom , loud , noises , Pie Chart , school , stomach , tummy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Just Like To Catch a Predator

Saturday 21 October 9:01:41 UTC 2017

educational last-weeks-title-yo lie to me lying Pie Chart reference television to catch a predator - 4443822848 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: educational , last-weeks-title-yo , lie to me , lying , Pie Chart , reference , television , to catch a predator Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Nobody Tosses a Dwarf

Saturday 21 October 9:01:38 UTC 2017

aragorn dwarf Lord of the Rings - 6118092032 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: aragorn , dwarf , Lord of the Rings Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » A Venn Diagram in a Men's Bathroom.

Saturday 21 October 9:01:37 UTC 2017

venn diagram bathroom pee jokes - 7143204608 Graph by: Twisteddoodles (via Twisted Doodles) Tagged: venn diagram , bathroom , pee jokes Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why "Thriller " is famous

Saturday 21 October 9:01:35 UTC 2017

dancing michael jackson Music music video Pie Chart thriller zombie - 2524464896 Graph by: hannahthehedgecat Tagged: dancing , michael jackson , Music , music video , Pie Chart , thriller , zombie Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Outbreak Does Not Look Good

Saturday 21 October 9:01:34 UTC 2017

Aliens Death humans outbreak outlook robots venn diagram zombie - 4555415808 Graph by: ekahnicole Tagged: Aliens , Death , humans , outbreak , outlook , robots , venn diagram , zombie Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Does That Mean Wizards are Mutants?!

Saturday 21 October 9:01:33 UTC 2017

Harry Potter mutants venn diagram wizards x men - 4941832704 Countdown to HP 7-2: TEN DAYS! But I gotta know, who did it better? Graph by: (via gallaghr) Tagged: Harry Potter , mutants , venn diagram , wizards , x men Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Choose Your Own Adventure Novel Adventure

Saturday 21 October 9:01:30 UTC 2017

best of week books fantasy flow chart sci fi - 5361432064 Graph by: (via www.box.net) Tagged: best of week , books , fantasy , flow chart , sci fi Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why Would Someone Do That?

Saturday 21 October 9:01:29 UTC 2017

bathroom humor pigeon Bar Graph - 7101154560 Graph by: (via Coolness Graphed) Tagged: bathroom humor , pigeon , Bar Graph Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » In Furniture, Nap in the Recliners

Saturday 21 October 9:01:26 UTC 2017

furniture ikea kitchen Pie Chart timer - 5360335104 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: furniture , ikea , kitchen , Pie Chart , timer Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Are You Ready to Hear the Same Crappy Twelve Songs Over and Over?

Saturday 21 October 9:01:25 UTC 2017

Music Pie Chart radio Songs - 6541892608 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Music , Pie Chart , radio , Songs Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Of Course None Of These Things Hurt

Saturday 21 October 9:01:22 UTC 2017

FPS games Pie Chart sad but true - 6478219264 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: FPS , games , Pie Chart , sad but true Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Blame Cell Phone Cameras

Saturday 21 October 9:01:21 UTC 2017

camera cellphone photographer - 7160691968 Graph by: julian.frare13 Tagged: camera , cellphone , photographer Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Super Size It

Saturday 21 October 9:01:19 UTC 2017

Big Man eating fat food obese serving sizes super size - 6207153408 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Big Man , eating , fat , food , obese , serving sizes , super size Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Amount Of Time Having A Giftcard Before Spending It

Saturday 21 October 9:01:18 UTC 2017

gift card shopping Line Graph - 7847068672 Graph by: sirpufferstien Tagged: gift card , shopping , Line Graph Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Can Tell You're Addicted to Fallout When…

Saturday 21 October 9:01:17 UTC 2017

Music fallout lyrics old timey video games Pie Chart - 6798384384 Get Over Here and Play a Video Game Graph by: frostatios Tagged: Music , fallout , lyrics , old timey , video games , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Wow, Numbers Are Like… Everywhere Man

Saturday 21 October 9:01:16 UTC 2017

clocks dates please stop time - 7945731584 Submitted by: Romllig2 Tagged: clocks , dates , please stop , time Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Colors by Culture

Saturday 21 October 9:01:15 UTC 2017

religion colors culture design infographic - 7941226496 Graph by: NowSourcing (via www.topwebdesignschools.org) Tagged: religion , colors , culture , design , infographic Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Your Posts on Memebase

Saturday 21 October 9:01:14 UTC 2017

attention memebase meta Pie Chart - 7939849728 Graph by: DUCDLOLZ Tagged: attention , memebase , meta , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How to Scare Kids now

Saturday 21 October 9:01:13 UTC 2017

confiscate internet kids lying monster Pie Chart room scare stuff threats - 2729698816 Graph by: ittehbittehkitteh Tagged: confiscate , internet , kids , lying , monster , Pie Chart , room , scare , stuff , threats Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Can it be fixed?

Saturday 21 October 9:01:10 UTC 2017

duct tape fix fixed WD-40 - 2566890496 Graph by: TimmyP Tagged: duct tape , fix , fixed , WD-40 Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » It's as Bad as It Looks

Saturday 21 October 9:01:09 UTC 2017

best of week english german grammar language - 6062173952 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , english , german , grammar , language Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Untitled

Saturday 21 October 9:01:08 UTC 2017

ask directions homeless mom venn diagram - 2829833472 Graph by: sugarparrot Tagged: ask , directions , homeless , mom , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Feeling for My Alarm Clock

Saturday 21 October 9:01:07 UTC 2017

alarm clock like a g6 morning P Diddy Pie Chart sleeping waking up - 4356161792 Graph by: cook_ayy Tagged: alarm clock , like a g6 , morning , P Diddy , Pie Chart , sleeping , waking up Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Pie Eaten

Saturday 21 October 9:01:06 UTC 2017

Cheezburger Image 3394974208 Graph by: bluevelvetcake Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Obvi

Saturday 21 October 9:01:05 UTC 2017

Line Graph math nerd proof - 4620825344 Graph by: (via I Love Charts) Tagged: Line Graph , math , nerd , proof Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Monday evening a manure storage facility at a farm ruptured releasing an estimated 250 thousand gallons of manure into an unnamed tributary to Stehman Run, which runs into the Conestoga River." Guess what that tributary is called now? [Sick]

Saturday 21 October 7:11:51 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Two-Way Traffic

Saturday 21 October 6:36:51 UTC 2017

In 2009 I mentioned that in 1895 Henry Simmons invented ramp-shaped railroad cars that could pass over one another. At the time I thought this was alarming, but something like it was actually carried out. On Coney Island’s Leap Frog Railway of 1905, one car full of passengers clambered over another: The passengers in breathless excitement momentarily anticipating disaster, realizing … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Britain prepares for the wrath of Brian. IT'S NOT A HURRICANE [Scary]

Saturday 21 October 6:24:47 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Texans who pleaded for hurricane relief after Harvey, on Puerto Rico: "They should stay where they are and fix their own country up. Lack of responsibility is not an emergency on my part" [Murica]

Saturday 21 October 5:55:42 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you are discharged/retired from the Armed Services, you might want to get your affairs in order. Tomorrow [News]

Saturday 21 October 4:27:51 UTC 2017

News [link] [371 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "It feels like something is eating my brain" said man with something eating his brain [Obvious]

Saturday 21 October 4:10:38 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » London is now more dangerous than New York [Scary]

Saturday 21 October 3:55:36 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teacher throws dildo-filled X-rated surprise party at school: "As the boy walked in, they surprised him with a hat that had a penis attached to the top and a string to be able to pull it so it can get erected" [Florida]

Saturday 21 October 3:26:53 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » WHO chooses Robert Mugabe as good will ambassador?? [Stupid]

Saturday 21 October 3:04:18 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In Scotland you will not be allowed to smack your children when they act up. You can still give them a Glasgow Kiss though [Obvious]

Saturday 21 October 1:50:05 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [78 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Missouri prepared to transform the Arch into a Stargate for Amazon [Satire]

Saturday 21 October 1:00:05 UTC 2017

Satire [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Indiana county shuts down successful needle exchange program because Jesus [Sick]

Saturday 21 October 0:16:10 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [141 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Hudson Henge" mystifies, excites the masses in New York City [Cool]

Saturday 21 October 0:10:05 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this herb harvest [Photoshop]

Saturday 21 October 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [17 comments] [Link]

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