John Gordon Ross

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » The inevitable result from getting busy in a Burger King bathroom. Shock G nods approvingly [Amusing]

Thursday 14 September 23:58:38 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » A woman faces battery charges after deputies say she hit a man who did not want to have sex with her [Florida]

Thursday 14 September 23:32:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Lil Kim is firing rockets again, putting Japan into a state of emergency [News]

Thursday 14 September 23:30:38 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » This time the faithful are super-duper sure that the world is totally ending next week, when the arrival of Nibiru will kill us all. So…Orgy? (possible nsfw content on page) [Unlikely]

Thursday 14 September 23:28:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Protesters grab the charging Wall Street Bull by the horns, violate its head with blue paint to protest climate change denial. No word on whether they grabbed its balls for extra excitement [Stupid]

Thursday 14 September 23:24:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » After 26 years of research, this author believes he can identify Jack the Ripper [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 22:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Sigmund? [Weird]

Thursday 14 September 22:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Tactical nuclear warheads heading to South Korea in 3 ….2 …. 1 [Spiffy]

Thursday 14 September 21:46:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Protip: If you hear moaning coming from the bedroom of your estranged wife, just let it go [Florida]

Thursday 14 September 21:16:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Things not to say to an active shooter: "I always knew you were going to shoot up the school" [PSA]

Thursday 14 September 20:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Oldest XXII+VI-XXVIII symbol found [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 20:41:54 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » 1,800 students locked in dorms, 55 police officers helpless to assist after heroic security guard subdues his own shoulder [Amusing]

Thursday 14 September 20:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "You just walk up to the person and say, 'I hex thee, I hex thee, I hex thee' …and then you throw dog poop on their shoes" [Unlikely]

Thursday 14 September 20:10:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this happy doggo [Photoshop]

Thursday 14 September 20:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Meh [Weeners]

Thursday 14 September 19:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Iron Chef edition – Chickpeas. That's right, Farkers, show us you've got game and present your winning recipes with the one and only.. Garbanzo Bean [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 19:40:43 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » The cause of the fire that caused $700,000 damage to an historic home on Candle Safety Day? Anyone? [Obvious]

Thursday 14 September 19:34:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man gets a master's degree in having his pocket picked [Dumbass]

Thursday 14 September 19:14:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man uses chainsaw to help wife in labor; ends up delivering twins [Hero]

Thursday 14 September 18:50:04 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » Who’s Calling?

Thursday 14 September 18:49:01 UTC 2017

Actual names found by Joseph F. Wilkinson on a CD-ROM of U.S. residential telephone directories, 1996: Barbara Seville
Gloria Monday
Rosetta Stone
Robin Banks
Frank Earnest
Clark Barr
Frank N. Stein
Georgia Peach
M.T. Head
Minnie Vann
Pearl Harper
Sunny Day
Phil Harmonic
Lance Boyle
King Fisher
Al Dente
Albert Fresco
James Dandy
Laurel Hardy
Nosmo King A few become … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why was Jimmy Carter flying a pirate flag? Skullduggery, of course [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 18:44:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Puppies training to be guide dogs get their first ride on mass transit. Ugly ass pictures inside [Cool]

Thursday 14 September 18:20:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to." –J. R. R. Tolkein. Much like a wizard, this is your day late Fark Writer's Thread "I meant to do that" edition [CSB]

Thursday 14 September 18:10:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » I'se the b'y that builds the boat / and I'se the b'y that sails her / and e's the b'y that stole some chicken an' jammed it down 'is ferks, lord tunderin' [Dumbass]

Thursday 14 September 17:40:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » This is Bonnie and Clyde. This is Bonnie and Clyde on meth. Any questions? [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 17:11:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » About that clown rally to protest IT [Fake]

Thursday 14 September 16:36:41 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » If you own an Amazon Echo or a Google Home and you saw last night's South Park, you were an unintentional part of the joke [Amusing]

Thursday 14 September 15:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Who orders a $4,000 painting and steaks and has UPS leave them on the front porch? [Strange]

Thursday 14 September 14:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » U.S. bans Visas in three countries that refuse to take deportees. MasterCard, American Express still OK [Obvious]

Thursday 14 September 14:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Another bear sighting in SE Iowa: Can Goldilocks be far behind?", asks TV station not familiar with the chronological order of the story [Fail]

Thursday 14 September 13:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Student who tried to get DACA classmate deported is deported from enrollment list [Ironic]

Thursday 14 September 13:15:43 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » Mystery Illustration 57

Thursday 14 September 13:10:46 UTC 2017

This complete kit equips you to…?

Answer is here.

Or after the jump. [Link]

Weird Universe » Burger Grease Artist

Thursday 14 September 13:03:00 UTC 2017

In 2009, Arby's commissioned artist Phil Hansen to paint a version of the Mona Lisa using grease from the burgers of 14 of their competitors. He called his creation Mona Greasa.

Another curious fact about Hansen. According to wikipedia, while in high school he managed to cause himself nerve damage because of his obsession with pointillism.

He's also written a … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this very dull meeting [Photoshop]

Thursday 14 September 13:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Actual headline: Self-proclaimed 'most vile man' posts threatening video on YouTube after motel massage goes awry [Creepy]

Thursday 14 September 12:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Go further without consent" [Fail]

Thursday 14 September 12:20:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Joplin, MO teacher kicks "busty" teen out of class., tells her "plus sized women need to shop at stores for plus sized people." With a pic to help you decide [Asinine]

Thursday 14 September 12:16:41 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » He is able to hear her, talk to her, and perceive her soul. She gives him an important sense of security. He says he cannot live without her. He's really happy now. He applies ointment to her elbow (Not safe for work) [Interesting]

Thursday 14 September 12:10:31 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Dealing with grief in the workplace is a lot easier if your workplace has copious amounts of alcohol available within arm's reach [Obvious]

Thursday 14 September 10:52:42 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » The word "foodie" no longer means what you think it means. Next time, use "food snob" and be proud of it, because everyone deserves food that's delicious and doesn't kill you [Obvious]

Thursday 14 September 9:29:09 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Let's check in on North Korea to see how they're handling those new UN sanctions [Obvious]

Thursday 14 September 8:28:58 UTC 2017

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GraphJam » That's Subtle

Thursday 14 September 7:32:35 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bag , bathroom , ladytimes , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Revised for More Truth

Thursday 14 September 7:32:33 UTC 2017

Graph by: niklah9 Tagged: hate , truth , grocery store Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Goodnight… I Guess

Thursday 14 September 7:32:32 UTC 2017

Graph by: buckles_b (via Bite) Tagged: pentagon , sides , wtf , sleep , shapes Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Amount of Time Spent on Google Earth

Thursday 14 September 7:32:31 UTC 2017

Graph by: schew07 Tagged: google earth , home , house , Maps , research , school Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why I'm Not Renewing My Lease

Thursday 14 September 7:32:29 UTC 2017

Graph by: bootbylicious Tagged: neighbors , lease , apartment Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Bananas Are Super Dangerous

Thursday 14 September 7:32:28 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bananas , cartoons , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » According to Teachers, the worst things in the world are

Thursday 14 September 7:32:27 UTC 2017

Graph by: duobrowman Tagged: late , Pie Chart , tardiness , teachers , try , wikipedia , work , world , worst Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » They Make It Seem so Easy

Thursday 14 September 7:32:25 UTC 2017

Graph by: (via Pleated Jeans) Tagged: easy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Americans, Feast on These Thanksgiving Facts!

Thursday 14 September 7:32:24 UTC 2017

Click here and gobble down all of our Thanksgiving humor in one place! Submitted by: rachelmark (via www.ereplacementparts.com) Tagged: infographic , thanksgiving Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Alternate History Channel

Thursday 14 September 7:32:23 UTC 2017

Graph by: Minerva9544 Tagged: Aliens , history channel , mummy chasers , nazis , Pie Chart , Truckers Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Look at All Those Singles

Thursday 14 September 7:32:22 UTC 2017

Graph by: youriceyblues Tagged: Pie Chart , stripper , tip , waitress Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Just Wait

Thursday 14 September 7:32:21 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: books , draco malfoy , Harry Potter , Movie , mudblood , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » U.S. Economy History

Thursday 14 September 7:32:20 UTC 2017

LoL by: TheNegotiator Tagged: economy , history , peace , war Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Hunger Games Alignment Chart

Thursday 14 September 7:32:19 UTC 2017

Quantifying Everything For Great Justice Graph by: (via Slacktory) Tagged: alignment , best of week , dd , hunger games , Memes , movies Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Did I Just Get GraphRoll'd?

Thursday 14 September 7:32:18 UTC 2017

Graph by: (via Hello With Cheese) Tagged: never gonna give , never gonna quit , rick astley , rickrollin , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I'm a Night Owl

Thursday 14 September 7:32:16 UTC 2017

Graph by: yukiyo89 Tagged: day , morning , night , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Apathy Charted

Thursday 14 September 7:32:14 UTC 2017

Meh Graph by: (via I Love Charts) Tagged: apathy , Line Graph , meh , whatever Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Doctor Who's Map of The TARDIS

Thursday 14 September 7:32:12 UTC 2017

See more Doctor Who here! Graph by: Aaron Tagged: map , tardis , doctor who Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Time she spends getting beautiful

Thursday 14 September 7:32:11 UTC 2017

Graph by: jaoponeis Tagged: beautiful , cosmetics , dates , dressing , hours , Line Graph , makeup , time Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Don't Have to Lie; This Is the Internet

Thursday 14 September 7:32:10 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: essays , faptimes , Pie Chart , school , wrist cramp Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What happens when you want to show a tecnician that something is not working

Thursday 14 September 7:32:09 UTC 2017

Graph by: Santy-uy Tagged: not , omfg , Pie Chart , shot , tech support , technician , working Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What people know of the Batman franchise

Thursday 14 September 7:32:08 UTC 2017

Graph by: rahrahryn Tagged: animated , batman , comics , franchise , movies , Pie Chart , series , song , Theme Song Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Right In the Kneecap

Thursday 14 September 7:32:07 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bicycles , bugs , gross , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Internet communities

Thursday 14 September 7:32:06 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: at , communities , connecting , crappy , dating , discussions , fake , friends , insults , internet , meeting , memories , Music , new , people , pictures , Pie Chart , profiles , promoting , sharing , social networking , stalking , strangers , uploading , website Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Everyone's Friends are Jerks

Thursday 14 September 7:32:05 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: password , phone , friend , facebook Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Do You Still Like Spaghetti?

Thursday 14 September 7:32:04 UTC 2017

Comic by: scourge108 Tagged: gangster , guido , How People View Me , italian , jersey shore Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Shake It

Thursday 14 September 7:32:02 UTC 2017

I only wanted 3. Graph by: Unknown Tagged: box , Line Graph , shake it , tic tacs Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Everyday

Thursday 14 September 7:32:01 UTC 2017

Graph by: Lizadeth Tagged: housework , lazy , chores Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How to Read Star Ratings

Thursday 14 September 7:32:00 UTC 2017

Source: xkcd Graph by: Unknown Tagged: amazon , instructions , online shopping , ratings , star , xckd Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » My Favorite Character is Tom Clancy! He's Been in a Ton of Games!

Thursday 14 September 7:31:59 UTC 2017

Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: video games , trolling , video game characters Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Walmart

Thursday 14 September 7:31:58 UTC 2017

Graph by: dragyngirl Tagged: cheap , children , clothes , crap , hideous , hobo , mental , patients , screaming , Walmart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Internet Just Loves Curiosity

Thursday 14 September 7:31:57 UTC 2017

Graph by: Chanoler Tagged: wtf , internet , curiosity Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Broadway Shows

Thursday 14 September 7:31:56 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: book of mormon , broadway , grease , Les Misérables Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Rage Quit to the Rescue!

Thursday 14 September 7:31:55 UTC 2017

Graph by: WWanderer Tagged: losing , Pie Chart , quitting , video games , xbox Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Classic: I Didn't Even Know Most of These Genres Existed

Thursday 14 September 7:31:54 UTC 2017

Graph by: Machowski Tagged: browsing , instant watch , netflix , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Lik Dis if U Crey Evrytime

Thursday 14 September 7:31:52 UTC 2017

Graph by: chocochick827 Tagged: swag , facecbook , Pie Chart , like dis Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Whales of Mass Destruction

Thursday 14 September 7:31:51 UTC 2017

Graph by: (via Cracked) Tagged: cracked , evil , infographic , killer whales , orcas Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Do You Look Like Sarah Jessica Parker?

Thursday 14 September 7:31:50 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: absurd , best of week , flow chart , horse , legs , sarah jessica parker Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » British Television Olympics

Thursday 14 September 7:31:49 UTC 2017

Get more Olympic fun at Roflympics! Graph by: (via Rolfrazzi) Tagged: britain , infographic , olympics Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » In Thirty More Years Kids Will Be the Size of Winnebagos

Thursday 14 September 7:31:48 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , charlie and the chocolate , fat , obesity , Willy Wonka , winnebago Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » These Are Rules, Not Guidelines

Thursday 14 September 7:31:46 UTC 2017

Graph by: (via Team Coco) Tagged: bathrooms , infographic , man code , men , urinals Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hillary reveals how alternate nostril breathing therapy has helped her [Weird]

Thursday 14 September 7:02:21 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » Hidden Mothers

Thursday 14 September 6:51:25 UTC 2017

In the 19th century, photographic subjects had to hold still during an exposure of 30 seconds or more. That’s hard enough for an adult, but it’s practically impossible for an infant. So mothers would sometimes hide in the scene, impersonating a chair or a pair of curtains, in order to hold the baby still while the photographer did his work: … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mystery aircraft crashes near Area 51. Morris's wife could not be reached for comment [Scary]

Thursday 14 September 6:26:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Racism is as American as baseball [Fail]

Thursday 14 September 5:42:57 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Salt Lake mayor: "At least 6 separate policies were broken in arrest of nurse who wasn't breaking any" [Followup]

Thursday 14 September 4:49:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Candidate says she has no idea who could be stealing opponents' yard signs and replacing them with hers while driving her truck [Unlikely]

Thursday 14 September 4:31:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Ugly-ass panda cub bares her first baby teeth at 3 months old. ROAR [Sappy]

Thursday 14 September 4:23:35 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 645: "In Memoriam: Night Skies, Landscapes, & Abandoned Places.". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 14 September 4:01:00 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Protip: If you have three prior felony drug convictions, using an auto shop called "Get Your Fix" as a cover business may not be such a good idea [Dumbass]

Thursday 14 September 3:12:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Army scientists discover power in urine." Pee All That You Can Pee [Spiffy]

Thursday 14 September 2:45:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Salt Lake City leaders look to legalize the building of 'mother-in-law apartments' which sounds much better than 'sister-wife stash house' [Strange]

Thursday 14 September 2:24:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Relationships are more likely to be successful when the woman is paired up with a less attractive man. So you're saying there's a chance? [Cool]

Thursday 14 September 2:06:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Arizona Motel 6 makes it really easy for guests to get ice [Sick]

Thursday 14 September 1:59:30 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Of course she used the county credit card. Dog tuxedos don't buy themselves [Stupid]

Thursday 14 September 1:44:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Copier company forced former employee into a pagan ritual to exorcise demons from office, lawsuit says [Weird]

Thursday 14 September 1:08:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man arrested for disrupting HBO movie production. Guess he got tired of all those white walkers bringing down the property values [Dumbass]

Thursday 14 September 1:04:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Millionaire opens his $30 million home to dozens of foster kids displaced by Hurricane Irma after they were evicted from their shelters. Bonus: arcade games everywhere [Hero]

Thursday 14 September 0:49:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » This just in: India has food trucks for elephants [Cool]

Thursday 14 September 0:24:21 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this enthusiastic quartet [Photoshop]

Thursday 14 September 0:00:01 UTC 2017

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