John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Chrome cow on stilts terrorizes kids in a park. Yup, it got weird [Weird]

Thursday 27 July 23:46:44 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trans troops to Trump: "Try it" [Hero]

Thursday 27 July 23:26:44 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [232 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In news overshadowed by crazy Mooch, Senate committee heard yesterday about Sergei Magnitsky, his murder, Vladimir Putin's billions stashed in the West, and Russian lobbying by the lawyer who met with Kushner and Trump Jr. .. LOUDER, Mooch [Follo

Thursday 27 July 23:06:44 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man charged with killing wife on Alaskan cruise ship claims "She would not stop laughing at me" defense, which kind of goes with "Murder Mystery" theme dinner taking place at same time [Followup]

Thursday 27 July 22:46:44 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Justin Trudeau continues to tick off boxes on his bucket list, gets his picture on the cover of the Rolling Stone [Cool]

Thursday 27 July 22:43:33 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teen who falsely claimed she was raped could face 32 years in prison [Dumbass]

Thursday 27 July 22:39:32 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [100 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Can you tell a venomous cottonmouth and harmless water snake apart? Nope, stop reading right there [Unlikely]

Thursday 27 July 22:16:44 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » $130 million gold in sunken WWII ship. Nazi? Actually it is, that's where ships usually sink [Cool]

Thursday 27 July 21:46:44 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Montreal is excited to host the Formula-E electric car race this weekend. Ohh, it'll be a great great day for a motorcar race, the sun shining, the roar of the…the roar of…umm, er…oh [Interesting]

Thursday 27 July 21:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Show us the dough, Farkers. It's time to break out the bread and tell us your secrets to making the good stuff [Interesting]

Thursday 27 July 21:03:25 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Game of Thrones' Hot Pie opens "You Know Nothing, John Dough" bakery to sell direwolf bread. No word yet on Bolton Sausage Factory and Gendry's Rowing Camp (contains spoilers from most recent episode) [Repeat]

Thursday 27 July 20:50:04 UTC 2017

Repeat [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Robots definitely don't have to look human in order to be sexual." Fine, furries, you win this round [Interesting]

Thursday 27 July 20:43:25 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [46 comments] [Link]

The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » How all shirts fit me

Thursday 27 July 20:20:29 UTC 2017

How all shirts fit meView [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today, in media fearmongering: spontaneously exploding sunroofs [Scary]

Thursday 27 July 20:16:45 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [33 comments] [Link]

The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » How to sneeze like I do

Thursday 27 July 20:08:53 UTC 2017

How to sneeze like I doView [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these red-heads [Photoshop]

Thursday 27 July 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What's that? You think your escargots de Bourgogne are from Burgundy? That they're even French? HA. Fool [Obvious]

Thursday 27 July 19:50:05 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [39 comments] [Link]

The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » Nausea vs Boredom

Thursday 27 July 19:45:25 UTC 2017

Nausea vs BoredomA comic about looking at your phone.View [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The manufacturer of the Fire Ball was issued a warning for "structural fatigue" going back as far as 2007 (WARNING: Graphic video) [Followup]

Thursday 27 July 19:30:44 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [169 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » News: London horder creates "the most dangerous house in England." Fark: By storing so many items outside his property he needs a ladder to get in through an upstairs window [Facepalm]

Thursday 27 July 19:06:44 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not a Disaster Movie pitch: Cruise ship traveling with another ship through the Northwest Passage in case Cruise ship gets into trouble. There are virtually no Emergency Response assets up there. Wish Ernest Borgnine was still alive [Asinine]

Thursday 27 July 18:46:44 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pacific Fleet commander announces that the U.S. could absolutely nuke China if the president ordered it. Hang on, a Vault Tech rep is at the door asking how many points I want to put into strength [Repeat]

Thursday 27 July 18:20:07 UTC 2017

Repeat [link] [198 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » City councilman learns body cams mean you can't bargain with officers after being arrested for DUI [Dumbass]

Thursday 27 July 18:16:44 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Tragedy averted as Canadian Supreme Court backs Inuit hamlet. Inuit Claudius and Inuit Gertrude await sentencing [Hero]

Thursday 27 July 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In Poland, it's legal to steal beer if you're naked [Unlikely]

Thursday 27 July 17:20:05 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bad: your house is infested with bedbugs. Worse: infested with hobos [Scary]

Thursday 27 July 16:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man arrested after putting dead prostitute in plastic bin and burying her in yard, apparently forgetting that you're supposed to compost them instead [Sick]

Thursday 27 July 16:20:05 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fancy a gin and tonic sausage? Me neither, but Northern Ireland's butchers are making them anyway [Weeners]

Thursday 27 July 15:50:05 UTC 2017

Weeners [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » No, you're not allowed to cover the big yellow sign that says your restaurant has a roach problem [Florida]

Thursday 27 July 15:20:06 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [83 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Planning to do any chores today you've been meaning to get to? You might want to put them off one more day. Just sayin' [Unlikely]

Thursday 27 July 15:07:50 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [148 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oregon scientists carry out first human gene embryo editing in US, raising the terrifying specter of a genetically enhanced Portland hipster [Interesting]

Thursday 27 July 15:05:08 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Beijing detains 18 members from a banned religious cult group that believes Jesus is a Chinese woman. Then things get weird [Weird]

Thursday 27 July 14:50:05 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [52 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Surf's up for these rabbits, who ride sheep to escape the floods of New Zealand [Amusing]

Thursday 27 July 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Wisconsin winning Powerball ticket holder has yet to come forward to claim $155 million prize [Strange]

Thursday 27 July 13:50:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm a shark. I'm a shark. Stop dragging me behind your boat at a high rate of speed. I'm a shark [Florida]

Thursday 27 July 13:32:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Transgender Army captain: 'This is who I am. I am a soldier. It's all I want to do' [Hero]

Thursday 27 July 13:20:05 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [284 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Conditioning experiment on Soviet child

Thursday 27 July 13:18:33 UTC 2017

I ran across these intriguing images in an old copy of Newsweek – March 28, 1960.

Unfortunately there wasn't much explanation about them. The caption read: "Psychological sputnik: Year-old Soviet child rigged for conditioning experiment."

An accompanying article, about the visit of Soviet psychologist Alexander R. Luria to the U.S., didn't refer to the images at all. But offered this … [Link]

Weird Universe » Yanks in the UK

Thursday 27 July 13:18:32 UTC 2017

This makes Brexit all the more mandatory!



Original article here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » University professor charged with keying peoples' cars. She is cooperating as the police have a key witness [Dumbass]

Thursday 27 July 13:05:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this driftwood woodman [Photoshop]

Thursday 27 July 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three things that you may not have known about trans soldiers, which will put you six things ahead of the President, because Smitty assumes that you already knew that trans folks aren't reverse vampires who feast on pills and drink only Cosmos [I

Thursday 27 July 12:35:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » U.S. military spends 10 times more on erectile dysfunction than transgender care [Stupid]

Thursday 27 July 12:20:05 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [252 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Authorities trying to find owner of prosthetic leg. No solid leads yet but the game's afoot [Weird]

Thursday 27 July 11:50:04 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Can't I even eat a goddamned taco without being told that I'm doing it wrong? [Stupid]

Thursday 27 July 11:18:11 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [203 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Maori were right all along. Giant mega-swan once walked the earth with us [Weird]

Thursday 27 July 10:08:16 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dealer "22 Jump Street" substitutes broccoli for weed, will shoot you for refusing to finishing your vegetables [Amusing]

Thursday 27 July 7:59:40 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Math Notes

Thursday 27 July 6:28:28 UTC 2017

(15 + 25) + (17 + 27) = 2 (1 + 2)4 (15 + 25 + 35) + (17 + 27 + 37) = 2 (1 + 2 + 3)4 (15 + 25 + 35 + 45) + (17 + 27 + 37 + 47) = 2 (1 + 2 + 3 + 4)4 (15 + 25 + 35 + … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The hits just keep coming, folks [Murica]

Thursday 27 July 5:28:23 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Game. On [Scary]

Thursday 27 July 5:06:36 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [150 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teacher that cartwheeled without underwear given probation for her cunning stunt [Followup]

Thursday 27 July 4:40:35 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [128 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 638: "Statuary 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 27 July 4:01:00 UTC 2017

Farktography [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Antivaxxers in Australia find a pricipal caught sayof and use this one weird trick to get their movie screened as an organic food documentary [Asinine]

Thursday 27 July 3:30:49 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » To prevent another Snowmageddon worsened by dumbass drivers, Vancouver considers fining motorists who aren't using snow tires in wintry conditions. The presumed alternative is to revoke their Canadian card [Strange]

Thursday 27 July 3:01:16 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some French teenagers spend their summer vacations on the Côte d'Azur or the Alps. Others come to New Jersey and break into cars [Fail]

Thursday 27 July 2:50:33 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Yes, I said a lot of crazy things. I'm ashamed of them actually. Looking back at them, it's like, wow, obviously I shouldn't drink." It's not a poster in a TFD thread, it's a defendant from the 2015 Bundy standoff in Neva

Thursday 27 July 2:50:05 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pick a famous person from history and give them a Fark username. Difficulty: "Godwin" is taken [Amusing]

Thursday 27 July 2:42:03 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [822 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What do the people in your state hate the most? Here's a handy map to find out. Oh, and Utah, you're not fooling anyone [Amusing]

Thursday 27 July 2:22:54 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [143 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Burglar disguises himself as ghost to make it past security camera, still gets caught. Claims he would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those meddling cops [Amusing]

Thursday 27 July 2:10:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It wasn't me, it was the one-armed, machete-wielding clown [Creepy]

Thursday 27 July 1:30:05 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Relax, Monctonians, that thing in the woods you've been obsessing over for the past 50+ years was merely a CIA spy camera. "Dad would have been going around saying, 'I told you so, I told you so.' He would have been pretty excited&#34

Thursday 27 July 1:28:12 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trump: Military or Trans, you can't be both. Canadian Forces: Join us [Hero]

Thursday 27 July 1:15:42 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [126 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 69 years ago today, Harry Truman ordered the racial desegregation of the U.S. military [Spiffy]

Thursday 27 July 1:01:36 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Toddler who was delivered on the side of Texas highway celebrates first birthday by having tea party with sheriff's deputy who delivered her (with 'Daaawwww' pics) [Sappy]

Thursday 27 July 0:50:05 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Go figure. Most climate change believers haven't changed their lifestyles, just want you minions to change yours [Interesting]

Thursday 27 July 0:33:41 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [152 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Please note: no matter how much you love your pets, you're still not allowed to bury them in a public park [Florida]

Thursday 27 July 0:10:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Then: Three percent. Second Amendment solutions. Patriotism. Now: I was manipulated into seeking fame [Followup]

Thursday 27 July 0:05:50 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this avid swimmer [Photoshop]

Thursday 27 July 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [26 comments] [Link]

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