John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » When 104 you reach, look this good you will not [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 23:30:50 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In swanky English restaurants, tea is the new wine, and establishments appropriately employ tea sommeliers to advise diners on correct tea to pair with food [Amusing]

Saturday 1 April 23:02:13 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Think you know everything about April Fools Day? Well, the joke is on you [Interesting]

Saturday 1 April 22:55:13 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » At least it's not well done and smothered in ketchup [Sick]

Saturday 1 April 22:30:50 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Aliens just landed their ship near me and they are asking to be taken to the planet's leader. Who do I send them to? Need advice soonish on this because they look really POed about something [Awkward]

Saturday 1 April 22:10:51 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Show us your fridge or pantry [Silly]

Saturday 1 April 21:50:02 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [237 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ; [Sad]

Saturday 1 April 21:25:24 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ISIS has an immediate opening for an energetic, dynamic propaganda chief who can avoid US airstrikes [Interesting]

Saturday 1 April 20:47:59 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Remember the breast cancer survivor who walked topless from Biloxi to D.C. to confront Congress? A journalist finally actually investigated the story, raising questions about the importance of truth versus the value of an inspiring symbol [Followup]

Saturday 1 April 20:04:18 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this camel-toed man [Photoshop]

Saturday 1 April 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » So I fed my dog some Cesar's Meat Lasagna dog food. It smelled quite good, and doesn't taste bad at all. What surprised you today? [Survey]

Saturday 1 April 19:38:25 UTC 2017

Survey [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Protip: If you have to drive to the courthouse to pick up a ankle monitor you should probably avoid taking the SUV you stole. Just saying [Fail]

Saturday 1 April 19:35:18 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There are two other kinds of people in the world: those who pre-wash dishes before putting them in the dishwasher and those who understand what the word "dishwasher" means [Obvious]

Saturday 1 April 19:18:11 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [174 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm back. The modmins are greening everything. How drunk are they? [Facepalm]

Saturday 1 April 19:13:42 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I want a smart and trainable pet, so fish and cats are right out. Other than dogs what are my other good options? [Survey]

Saturday 1 April 18:42:24 UTC 2017

Survey [link] [151 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Everything you heard about lonely, unhappy single people is wrong" [Spiffy]

Saturday 1 April 18:38:30 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [108 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Since the politics tab has been taken over, I declare TFD the place for all political discussion. So, what dumb shiat has King Cheeto done so far today? [Obvious]

Saturday 1 April 17:49:57 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [133 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hold still, darling – we just want to get an adorable picture of you with the CRIKEY [Scary]

Saturday 1 April 17:34:54 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 4 Female Architects Who Shaped the World

Saturday 1 April 17:30:00 UTC 2017

Female architects are changing landscapes across the globe—literally! [Link]

Mental Floss » Look Up! Tonight Is Your Big Chance to See Little Mercury

Saturday 1 April 16:48:58 UTC 2017

If you like planets and watch to catch ‘em all, get your poké balls ready. [Link]

Mental Floss » Revisiting the First 'Trial of the Century,' More Than 215 Years Later

Saturday 1 April 16:30:00 UTC 2017

In 1800, Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr—history’s most famous frenemies—teamed up to get Levi Weeks acquitted of murder. [Link]

Mental Floss » Amazon Isn't Fooling Around With Its Weekend Deals

Saturday 1 April 16:00:00 UTC 2017

From the Smart Shopping Team… [Link]

Futility Closet » Aronson’s Sequence

Saturday 1 April 15:51:49 UTC 2017

In 1982, J.K. Aronson of Oxford, England, sent this mysterious fragment to Douglas Hofstadter: ‘T’ is the first, fourth, eleventh, sixteenth, twenty-fourth, twenty-ninth, thirty-third … The context of their discussion was self-reference, so presumably the intended conclusion of Aronson’s sentence was … letter in this sentence. If one ignores spaces and punctuation, then T does indeed occupy those positions in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What do they call the "Texas" style Whopper in Texas to make it sound more exotic to Texans? [Interesting]

Saturday 1 April 15:20:57 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [255 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I was given a couple large bottles of Sangria syrup (Starbucks brand). What can I make with this that a plebe like myself would enjoy? Non-alcoholic drinks preferred but I am open to anything. …Anything [Survey]

Saturday 1 April 14:47:09 UTC 2017

Survey [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Researchers think newly discovered tunnels in South America were dug out by giant sloths. Talk about a slow news day [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 14:43:27 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In honor of the day, the Saturday Morning Book Club is looking for the books that make you laugh out loud everytime you read them. Other than Drew's book, of course, as that one is obvious [Amusing]

Saturday 1 April 14:30:00 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [139 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man accused of pulling a gun, shooting at a car and unlawful use of a donut. Wait, what? [Stupid]

Saturday 1 April 14:22:20 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Last night my Roomba came home late smelling of Carpet Fresh, and it has new paint job: red with a white tail. I think it joined the Dirt Devils [Asinine]

Saturday 1 April 14:19:39 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Every Golden Girls Episode, in a Nutshell

Saturday 1 April 14:16:35 UTC 2017

Elderly woman, exiting bathroom and laughing: Oh, that's just great for someone like me, who's single, selfish and horny! Washington, DC Overheard by: what were they talking about..?? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Farewell John Harrison, Tuskegee Airman, USAF retired and Peace Corps administrator in East Africa [Hero]

Saturday 1 April 14:14:35 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you have the time, here are the world's most stylish clocks. Bonus: not a slideshow [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 13:36:31 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this chess player [Photoshop]

Saturday 1 April 13:30:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three arrested in connection with overpass collapse. Beware; auto-play video [Followup]

Saturday 1 April 13:17:47 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There are two types of people in the world: those who refrigerate their bread and those who actually have a working brain [Obvious]

Saturday 1 April 13:11:44 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [89 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » High winds? High waves? Dinky little sailboat? Big pier? Checkaroonie all around [Fail]

Saturday 1 April 13:06:40 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Spain: BREXIT means we get Gibraltar [Unlikely]

Saturday 1 April 12:40:09 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [164 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » California smokers face a 40% price increase starting today (no joke) after state voters confirmed that not all taxes are created equal [Interesting]

Saturday 1 April 12:10:30 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [186 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some humans believe in love at first sight. In the case of Tres and Lilly, you could say it was love at first sniff, just in time for Caturday [Caturday]

Saturday 1 April 12:00:00 UTC 2017

Caturday [link] [638 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Controlling Turtle Motion with Human Thought

Saturday 1 April 11:49:55 UTC 2017

Researchers in Korea are developing a technology that will allow humans to control turtles through thought alone. This is achieved without having to implant any device inside the turtle's brain. Nor does it involve telekinetic powers.

It takes advantage of the fact that a turtle will reliably walk towards a white light, because of their instinctive escape behavior. So the … [Link]

Weird Universe » Runaway Groom

Saturday 1 April 11:49:54 UTC 2017

Original article here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cool: Wildflowers bloom in the California desert after record rains, leaving a beautiful landscape. Fail: Thousands of tourists descend upon the desert, offending locals and creating traffic jams [Facepalm]

Saturday 1 April 11:24:42 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » So I wanted in and I created a name, started posting on the Fark, where to start my game? All these greats around, would I find my place? To play my part, drinkin' Heinekens and IPAs. (…they brought the lulz, and I'm still glad they ponifie

Saturday 1 April 11:02:50 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [127 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How Much Money Was Actually Stolen in Hollywood's Biggest Heist Films?

Saturday 1 April 11:00:00 UTC 2017

Compared to 'Die Hard,' the 'Heat' gang was going after chump change. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's April Fools' Day. Come up with a good headline that would make a good gag for this special day [Amusing]

Saturday 1 April 10:15:48 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [159 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oh My 2018 [Hero]

Saturday 1 April 9:47:49 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » On This Day in 1960, NASA Took the First TV Picture from Space

Saturday 1 April 9:00:00 UTC 2017

The satellite that took the picture worked for 78 days…and it's still up there. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Donald Trump has AIDes [Obvious]

Saturday 1 April 8:29:31 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Famous Birthdays to Celebrate in April

Saturday 1 April 8:00:00 UTC 2017

Do you share a birthday with one of these famous figures? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Gilbert Baker dead at 65. Rainbow flags to be flown at half-staff [Sad]

Saturday 1 April 7:17:12 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police officers build beeping Easter eggs so that visually impaired children can join in on the hunt. "Every kid loves Easter and finding Easter eggs and this is just a way to let everybody participate in it" [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 7:12:29 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Giant Bed Is a Tourist Attraction From Shakespeare's Day

Saturday 1 April 7:00:00 UTC 2017

A sprawling bed built to bring tourists to Ware, England is still turning heads today. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » School located on continent where lethal animals are always hunting you and the dandelions are poisonous has decided that cartwheels are just too dangerous [Asinine]

Saturday 1 April 6:24:20 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fearless Russian men hug and then ride brown bears. Which is totally not gay somehow [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 5:20:57 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Someone figured out how to grow rock candy inside of chocolate shells. Chocolate geodes anyone? [Cool]

Saturday 1 April 5:02:10 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 Offbeat Holidays to Celebrate in April

Saturday 1 April 5:00:00 UTC 2017

It's time to celebrate Spring and all the quirky holidays that come with it. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Get your defibrillators ready: Extra potent coffee that can cause heart palpitations now available [Stupid]

Saturday 1 April 2:51:12 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Putin shows his toughness and opens his heart to Donald Trump amid Arctic ice while chanelling Ronald Reagan [Interesting]

Saturday 1 April 2:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 50 totally doable April Fool's Day pranks. "Dude, I totally had sex with your mom yesterday" not included [Giggity]

Saturday 1 April 1:58:25 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japan – they kill things that we like [Unlikely]

Saturday 1 April 1:36:24 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three college students arrested for an $8,000 prostitution deal after police carry out undercover sting operation at a hotel. At least it was a memorable spring break [Florida]

Saturday 1 April 1:32:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [80 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 8 Behind-the-Scenes Secrets of a 'Star Wars' Poster Artist

Saturday 1 April 1:00:00 UTC 2017

7. A single hair cannot be out of place. Literally. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Those hippies who grow your pot are at it again. "…the results came back positive for multiple pesticides, including one that can become hydrogen cyanide when heated–a […] substance once used in gas chambers." But weed is, like, natural,

Saturday 1 April 0:44:05 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [104 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this family having too much fun to be safe [Photoshop]

Saturday 1 April 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » One Thing the U.S. and USSR Could Agree on During the Cold War

Saturday 1 April 0:00:00 UTC 2017

The U.S. and the Soviet Union had plenty of differences during the Cold War, but they were like birds of a feather on one particular topic. [Link]

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