Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » This little piggy went to market. To be specific, it was Home Depot [Amusing]

Friday 10 March 23:20:06 UTC 2017

[link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » $4.5 million worth of eyeshadow stolen from San Fernando Valley warehouse. Suspects include Green Day, KISS and every single Kardashian [Strange]

Friday 10 March 22:50:04 UTC 2017

[link] [64 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Fart Jars of 17th Century Europe

Friday 10 March 22:36:50 UTC 2017

There was a perfectly sound reason why physicians advised patients to capture farts in a bottle. [Link]

Mental Floss » Small Dietary Changes Could Bring Big Environmental Gains

Friday 10 March 22:36:49 UTC 2017

It could save the U.S. $77 billion (or more) in healthcare costs and reduce each person’s greenhouse gas emissions by nearly 500 pounds per year. [Link]

Mental Floss » If You Get a Call From a 473 Area Code, It’s Probably a Scam

Friday 10 March 22:36:48 UTC 2017

And you'll be stuck with the phone bill. [Link]

Mental Floss » 8 Online Dating Red Flags

Friday 10 March 22:36:47 UTC 2017

Dating experts reveal eight signs you should run for the hills. [Link]

Mental Floss » American Library Association Updates Its CRAAP Test for Spotting Fake News

Friday 10 March 22:36:46 UTC 2017

One part of the system recently required a closer look. [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Do We Use the Same Voice to Talk to Babies and Dogs?

Friday 10 March 22:30:00 UTC 2017

Nope, it's not because they're equally adorable. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Five-year-old girl qualifies for Scripps National Spelling Bee with "jnana." That's how I spelled everything when I was five [Spiffy]

Friday 10 March 22:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [50 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Google’s Convenient New CAPTCHA Will Track Your Clicks

Friday 10 March 22:00:00 UTC 2017

The new algorithm doesn’t even have to ask if you’re a robot. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Hey, let's stop by the side of the road and watch the grass fire-" BANG (Yep, video) [Scary]

Friday 10 March 21:50:05 UTC 2017

[link] [78 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Literature-Themed Coloring Books

Friday 10 March 21:30:00 UTC 2017

A different kind of book to curl up with after a stressful day. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man who says "I'm hungry" robs blood bank. Police arm themselves with silver crosses, garlic, and wooden stakes [Florida]

Friday 10 March 21:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop gettin' her science on [Photoshop]

Friday 10 March 21:00:01 UTC 2017

[link] [36 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Coming Soon: Two Unreleased David Bowie Albums

Friday 10 March 21:00:00 UTC 2017

The limited edition LPs will be released in honor of Record Store Day's 10th anniversary on April 22. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mop crime on the rise in London [Weird]

Friday 10 March 20:50:04 UTC 2017

[link] [37 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » 7 Clicks (March 10, 2017)

Friday 10 March 20:43:02 UTC 2017

7 Clicks
March 10, 2017

Gubment + Appeals Court: Can gov't "protect" endangered "dusky gopher frogs" just because they used to live at X place, and may come back to X place, but haven't been around X place "for decades"? [Daily Caller]

Can you think of a worse idea than building one of those mall toddler playgrounds, for inside a … [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 of the Most Delicious Reuben Sandwiches in the U.S.

Friday 10 March 20:30:00 UTC 2017

This deli staple is worth traveling for. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Florida passes death penalty reform bill requiring juries to vote unanimously to sentence someone to death, and to ban the practice of death clowns entertaining spectators between executions. Okay, maybe that last part isn't actually in there [Fl

Friday 10 March 20:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [42 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Cross-Country Golf

Friday 10 March 20:01:49 UTC 2017

In 1953, 150 golfers participated in a “Golden Ball” competition in which they teed off at the first tee at Cill Dara Golf Club in Kildare, Ireland, and holed out at the 18th hole at the Curragh, about 5 miles away. A prize of £1 million was offered for a hole in one, which would have been well earned, as … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Let's see: $8.10 an hour, work up to eight hours a day, with bonuses for how big a python you can pull. Hm, this job sounds perfect [Florida]

Friday 10 March 19:50:04 UTC 2017

[link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man crosses Atlantic Ocean unaided on a paddle board [Hero]

Friday 10 March 19:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [106 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis: Ok, so maybe the word WAS "celebRate" after all [Interesting]

Friday 10 March 19:13:15 UTC 2017

[link] [54 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 3200-Year-Old Statues of Pharaohs Unearthed in Cairo

Friday 10 March 19:10:54 UTC 2017

Archaeologists believe the statues may depict the pharaohs Ramses the Great and his grandson Seti II. [Link]

Mental Floss » English Palace Identifies Marble Garden Planter as Roman Sarcophagus

Friday 10 March 19:10:53 UTC 2017

The artifact is believed to date back to the 2nd century CE. [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Things You Might Not Know About Daylight Saving Time

Friday 10 March 19:10:41 UTC 2017

It's that time of year again… [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Pointy Pieces of Slayer Slang from 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'

Friday 10 March 19:00:00 UTC 2017

From sitch to five by five, here are just a few of our Buffy the Vampire Slayer slang terms in honor of the 20th anniversary of the show's debut. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The son of a World War II vet has made it his life's mission to track down as many soldiers as possible that his father sketched during the war. Sir, we salute you [Murica]

Friday 10 March 18:46:35 UTC 2017

[link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This man's life was changed by going to Hooters on the day without women [Hero]

Friday 10 March 18:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [242 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canadian judge who told a rape victim "keep your knees together" resigns in disgrace [Followup]

Friday 10 March 18:14:04 UTC 2017

[link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » $300,000.00 McLaren + Drunken idiot. Bet you'll never guess what happens [Fail]

Friday 10 March 17:50:04 UTC 2017

[link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently, blowing someone away for using a cell phone in a movie theatre doesn't qualify for a 'stand your ground' defense, even in Florida [Florida]

Friday 10 March 17:41:00 UTC 2017

[link] [216 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Iditarod

Friday 10 March 17:17:41 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Catholic priest dresses up as Hugh Hefner and simulates sex with male playboy bunnies on a carnival float on a highway to hell [Amusing]

Friday 10 March 17:17:00 UTC 2017

[link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Study Links Depression With Gut Bacteria Imbalance

Friday 10 March 17:00:00 UTC 2017

Scientists hope to one day replace antidepressants with probiotics. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Newborns are a little young to be boxing [Interesting]

Friday 10 March 16:40:05 UTC 2017

[link] [47 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' Products You Need to Own Right Now

Friday 10 March 16:30:00 UTC 2017

Never sleep without your trusty stake again. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today's Florida mad libs headline: Drunk tourist rolls golf cart while attempting to run over a rooster [Florida]

Friday 10 March 16:10:06 UTC 2017

[link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » High-tech greenhouse built to grow gourmet lettuce has neighbors outraged over light pollution. In other news, gourmet lettuce? [Stupid]

Friday 10 March 15:50:05 UTC 2017

[link] [122 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » George Washington Was Downright Amazing at Naming Dogs

Friday 10 March 15:23:07 UTC 2017

In addition to his other numerous talents, the first president could have put "skilled in the art of naming domesticated pets" on his resume. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Construction unearths centuries-old coffins in Philadelphia, could lead to a series of new curses [Interesting]

Friday 10 March 15:20:05 UTC 2017

[link] [56 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Watch an Artist Recreate Cosmic Radiation With Sand

Friday 10 March 15:00:00 UTC 2017

After taking two weeks to complete, the work was destroyed. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Newly identified fault line in California could unleash a "monster" earthquake. Scientists say they haven't discovered a fault line in California this dangerous in more than a week [Followup]

Friday 10 March 14:50:04 UTC 2017

[link] [49 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Risque Produce Labels

Friday 10 March 14:22:20 UTC 2017

There's a collector's market for old produce labels that decorated fruit and vegetable crates, because back in the day these labels were often quite artistic. Some of the labels were also slightly risque, because sex can sell anything, even apples and veggies.

Once cardboard boxes were introduced, these kinds of labels fell out of use.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » The D.C. Metro is already seven months behind schedule in being able to kill anyone with its new Purple Line, and now it may have to wait even longer. Why? Owls [Fail]

Friday 10 March 14:12:06 UTC 2017

[link] [90 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » 3PM Cancer Break

Friday 10 March 14:04:39 UTC 2017

Manager: We’re in Gwinnett County. You need to be 10 feet from the walkway if you want to legally smoke.
Smoker #1: Like, isn’t that unfair? What if you’re a midget? Your feet would be about half the size of mine…No, seriously. Look how big my feet are! They’re like twice the size of midget feet…Oh! You mean like a … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this sunset [Photoshop]

Friday 10 March 14:00:01 UTC 2017

[link] [57 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 Secrets of Historical Reenactors

Friday 10 March 14:00:00 UTC 2017

They might wear breeches to the grocery store. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Don't you just hate it when you're in the middle of a live interview and the kids just want to play with daddy [Video]

Friday 10 March 13:37:49 UTC 2017

[link] [101 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The story behind why Irishmen toss cabbages at St. Patrick's Day parades [Interesting]

Friday 10 March 12:57:10 UTC 2017

[link] [63 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Iditarod

Friday 10 March 12:45:00 UTC 2017

[Link]

Weird Universe » Armed and Clumsy: The Ancestors: 1

Friday 10 March 12:32:00 UTC 2017

How far back do the roots of Chuck's "Armed and Clumsy" category extend? The Wikipedia entry on handguns says: "The first handheld firearms that might better be called "pistols" were made as early as the 15th century…" Could we find a report of some soldier of the era accidentally wounding himself? It's a challenge!

In any case, here is an … [Link]

Mental Floss » These Sour Gummy Sloths Are Cute Enough to Eat

Friday 10 March 12:30:00 UTC 2017

Take it easy and enjoy some adorable sour candy. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman hauls suitcase containing elderly man's body across the country and police aren't sure why [Strange]

Friday 10 March 12:02:08 UTC 2017

[link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dramatic NASA photos show the effects of recent California storms in alleviating drought. The state is now 83% drought free [Cool]

Friday 10 March 5:45:35 UTC 2017

[link] [107 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drunk, bleeding, and carrying a stolen container of gelato is no way to go through your arrest, young man [Fail]

Friday 10 March 3:18:56 UTC 2017

[link] [10 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guess what happened after surgeons were told to stop prescribing so many painkillers? Go on and guess [Interesting]

Friday 10 March 3:12:29 UTC 2017

[link] [173 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Transplant discovers new home's pool attracts more than just neighborhood kids, uninvited skinny dippers. "I'm not from Florida so I'm not used to alligators" [Florida]

Friday 10 March 3:01:47 UTC 2017

[link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sure, dalmatians look great on your fire truck, but can they detect your cancer? Hero tag for the mutts sniffing butts [Hero]

Friday 10 March 2:47:43 UTC 2017

[link] [13 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Unquote

Friday 10 March 2:22:22 UTC 2017

“Dirt is not dirt, but only matter in the wrong place.” — Lord Palmerston [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You have the right to remain silent.. unless of course you want to promote your mixtape while we cuff and arrest you on murder charges [Dumbass]

Friday 10 March 2:10:22 UTC 2017

[link] [13 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Raising Kids in the City Costs $9000 More Than in the Suburbs

Friday 10 March 2:00:00 UTC 2017

But it depends on which suburb you're moving to. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bird-in-Hand man accused of tax fraud saying using a Social Security number is like Mark-of-Beast [Dumbass]

Friday 10 March 1:53:13 UTC 2017

[link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ten-year-old boy finds grandmother's €10,000 life savings, brings the money to school and shares it with classmates. "If your child has been given any of this money, please contact the school immediately so it can be returned to the pup

Friday 10 March 1:39:20 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Leaked documents exculpate Australian government from clandestine ties with Putin [Awkward]

Friday 10 March 1:36:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Facebook's pre-crime division is working on teaching computers to predict what happened next [Creepy]

Friday 10 March 1:18:56 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Mother claims the new talking Thomas the Tank Engine should be renamed Thomas the Potty Mouth Tank Engine [Amusing]

Friday 10 March 1:01:47 UTC 2017

[link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In a game of cornhole, only a precise hit will trigger a chain reaction that will destroy the entire station [Cool]

Friday 10 March 0:27:30 UTC 2017

[link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Most people who find a two-metre long diamond python snake in their roof would freak out …unless you're Aussies, then you keep it as a pet and name it 'Diana' [Weird]

Friday 10 March 0:10:22 UTC 2017

[link] [18 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Want to Eat Healthier? Listen to Your Biological Clock

Friday 10 March 0:00:00 UTC 2017

Knowing your chronotype can help you make better food choices. [Link]

John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons