John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » El Chapo annoyed that American jailers take keeping him in jail seriously [Obvious]

Friday 3 February 23:50:05 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » USS Cole is patrolling off the coast of Yemen. Let's hope this isn't a repeat from 2000 [Scary]

Friday 3 February 23:20:06 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 17 Super Facts About the Atlanta Falcons

Friday 3 February 23:19:46 UTC 2017

From adventurous mascots to touchdown dance crazes, here’s a quick primer on everything you should know about the “Dirty Birds.” [Link]

Mental Floss » Choose The Right 'Tri-' Word

Friday 3 February 23:19:25 UTC 2017

Take the quiz! [Link]

Mental Floss » What Number Is The Answer?

Friday 3 February 23:19:24 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » So those videos Centcom showed off yesterday of all the "valuable intelligence" the supposedly captured in that disastrous raid in Yemen that got a Navy SEAL killed. Yeah, they just copped to the fact those are really Youtube videos from 2007

Friday 3 February 22:50:05 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [122 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Montana legislature debates bill allowing hunters to wear fluorescent pink instead of orange, dubbed the "Aw Hell No What the Sweet Christ Y'all Buncha Damn Sissy Pantywaists Thinkin'" Act of 2017 [Silly]

Friday 3 February 22:20:05 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Do Certain Sounds Enrage You? Neurologists May Know Why

Friday 3 February 22:00:00 UTC 2017

Neurologists have spotted physical differences in the brains of people who are triggered by specific noises. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Heard of the 'Don't flash your headlights at high beams' urban legend? Not an urban legend anymore [Scary]

Friday 3 February 21:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Steps for Stress-Free Mattress Shopping

Friday 3 February 21:30:00 UTC 2017

Some companies will donate your brand-new mattress to charity if you don't like it—and still give you a full refund. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bearded man tosses explosives into a Pasadena CA Cheescake Factory. Penny Hofstadter thankful she no longer works there [Scary]

Friday 3 February 21:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [100 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this classically posing dog [Photoshop]

Friday 3 February 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New York police investigate a potential suicidal jump off the George Washington Bridge, though some witnesses say a green man on a glider was seen battling with a man in red and blue tights and tossed a bound blonde woman over the side [Scary]

Friday 3 February 20:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Black and White

Friday 3 February 20:46:02 UTC 2017

By Berthold Weiß. White to mate in two moves. SelectClick for Answer 1. Qh8!, threatening 2. Qa8#. If 1. … Qb8 then 2. Qa1#! From The Good Companion, 1917. [Link]

Mental Floss » How Did the Super Bowl's "I'm Going to Disney World" Slogan Originate?

Friday 3 February 20:30:00 UTC 2017

How a throwaway comment turned into a long-lasting Super Bowl tradition. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man opens dental practice after watching a few YouTube videos. Fark: And performs some successful procedures before getting caught [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 20:20:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Does it bug the hell out of you to hear other people eat? If yes, scientists say your brain is abnormal [Strange]

Friday 3 February 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [147 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 Secrets of Forensic Entomologists

Friday 3 February 19:40:26 UTC 2017

4. They rarely go to crime scenes. [Link]

Mental Floss » New Dating App Matches You Based on a Mutual Hatred of Things

Friday 3 February 19:30:00 UTC 2017

Dating apps typically pair couples up according to their shared interests, but Hater matches users on the basis of their dislikes. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man who repeatedly insists in divorce court that he's unable to pay his ex-wife's attorney fees because he's broke and unable to find work shows up to court one day driving a brand new car. You can guess what happens next [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 19:20:06 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [107 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm a cheerleader crab, your argument is invalid [Interesting]

Friday 3 February 19:14:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Weddings Are Getting Smaller—And More Expensive

Friday 3 February 19:00:00 UTC 2017

Couples now spend an average of $245 per wedding guest. [Link]

Weird Universe » The Dobson Air Dart

Friday 3 February 18:38:09 UTC 2017

I wonder if any plans still exist, to allow someone to build this craft today.

Original ad here.

Original article here. [Link]

Mental Floss » TGI Fridays's Origin Story: A Pioneering Singles Bar

Friday 3 February 18:30:00 UTC 2017

The restaurant chain was intended to be “a cocktail party you didn’t need an invitation to." [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Learned That One the Hard Way

Friday 3 February 18:20:44 UTC 2017

Coworker #1: You should use the clap method.
Coworker #2: Me and the clap just don't mix. Washington, DC [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Alcohol abuse may be the single best predictor of whether you commit gun violence in America" [Murica]

Friday 3 February 18:20:05 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some guidelines for Tinder users. 1: Don't send pictures of your schlong 2: Don't swipe left compulsively 3: Make sure your date doesn't rob your clothes and leave you to walk home naked [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 17:50:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Annie’s Homegrown Is Streaming the First Annual Bunny Bowl

Friday 3 February 17:45:00 UTC 2017

The Puppy Bowl has some seriously cute competition. [Link]

Mental Floss » A Lava Stream Is Pouring into the Ocean in Hawaii

Friday 3 February 17:30:00 UTC 2017

The USGS describes it as a "firehose." [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japan has a word for "literally worked to death." It's "karoshi" and it happens pretty frequently [Scary]

Friday 3 February 17:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How 'Sesame Street' Dealt With 9/11

Friday 3 February 17:00:00 UTC 2017

The venerable children's show had to find a way to bring the real-world horror to their young audience's attention. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Influential muggle news outlet Washington Post censors the word "mudbl–d" (paragraph 11) [Strange]

Friday 3 February 16:50:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [105 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Have you installed a thermidor in your automobile?

Friday 3 February 16:20:00 UTC 2017

In 1975, the Federal Energy Administration (FEA) conducted a telephone survey about energy conservation and included the question, "Have you installed a thermidor in your automobile?"

Five percent of the people who took the survey stated that they had. Therefore, the FEA concluded that 5 percent of the survey takers were lying in their responses, because Thermidor is a month … [Link]

Mental Floss » A New Hammerhead Shark Species May Have Just Been Discovered

Friday 3 February 15:59:39 UTC 2017

Scientists found a genetically unique population of bonnethead sharks in the waters off Belize. [Link]

Mental Floss » 8 Facts About Super Bowl I

Friday 3 February 15:59:38 UTC 2017

The first championship game between the NFL and AFL was something bordering on disaster. [Link]

Mental Floss » Need Help Filing Your Taxes? IBM's Watson Can Help

Friday 3 February 15:59:37 UTC 2017

H&R Block has partnered with IBM to use Watson’s computing power to get customers the best possible tax return. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The City of Ottawa to use a big red O for all their transit stops. However, men may never know if it is fake or real [Giggity]

Friday 3 February 15:50:05 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » A Hayao Miyazaki-Inspired Art Show Is Coming to San Francisco

Friday 3 February 15:30:00 UTC 2017

Fifty artists have created works that celebrate the legendary director. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police station fumigated after men caught in a store sex act were found to have scabies [Scary]

Friday 3 February 15:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dozens of Britons notice the introduction of vegetable rationing. Haggis still an acceptable entree [Interesting]

Friday 3 February 14:50:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [93 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 Products That Taste and Smell Like Pickles

Friday 3 February 14:30:00 UTC 2017

Relish the taste of pickles? Now everything can taste like dill. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Relax everyone. There won't be an aporkalypse [Followup]

Friday 3 February 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this typical winter event [Photoshop]

Friday 3 February 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Doctors are warning parents about the latest stupid internet game called "the salt and ice challenge." Basically it gives your skin instant frostbite, and you lose blood vessels and nerve endings. Yay [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 13:50:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [121 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Rebel Set

Friday 3 February 13:15:00 UTC 2017

[Link]

Mental Floss » Prepare Your Entire Breakfast—Coffee Included—With One Efficient Appliance

Friday 3 February 13:00:00 UTC 2017

Ding! Bacon, sausage, eggs, toast, and coffee are ready. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man brings knife to a gun fight at the Louvre with predictable results [Scary]

Friday 3 February 12:51:07 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Your Super Bowl Guide

Friday 3 February 11:30:00 UTC 2017

Great links to start a great weekend! [Link]

Mental Floss » Scaling the World's Largest Trees in the Name of Science

Friday 3 February 9:30:00 UTC 2017

California's ongoing drought is impacting the state's mighty sequoias. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A third of US citizens believe only Christians can be true Americans like Jesus was [Murica]

Friday 3 February 9:12:48 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [343 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 'Sharkwater' filmmaker disappears in ocean near Florida Keys, presumed to be making new documentary detailing life inside a shark [Sad]

Friday 3 February 8:18:29 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Vets are seeing a lot of stoned dogs lately. Symptoms include lethargy and non-stop video game play. Also, loss of appetite which makes no sense. These dogs don't know how to party [Strange]

Friday 3 February 6:49:16 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Germany erects wall around America and the tourists love it [Amusing]

Friday 3 February 6:47:03 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » KellyAnne Conway cites the infamous Bowling Green Massacre in defense of Trump's Muslim ban. And really, who could ever forget that tragic event? [Fail]

Friday 3 February 6:35:07 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [395 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Gesundheit

Friday 3 February 6:28:24 UTC 2017

Image: Wikimedia Commons Classical statues tend to lose their noses, and in the 19th century museums would commonly replace them with “restoration” noses, to preserve the appearance of the original sculpture. In the 20th century some museums changed philosophies and “de-restored” their collections, thinking it better to present each piece in its authentic state. This created a superfluity of noses, and … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » IRS lawyer arrested for selling meth. Adding insult to injury: his plans to deduct his expenses on Schedule C derailed by 26 USC § 280E [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 5:57:55 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » *Sigh* Once again, when at the airport or on a plane don't talk about having a bomb. In fact, avoid using the word "bomb" at all [PSA]

Friday 3 February 4:43:59 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Judge Doody drops the puck on gold digger that smuggled precious metals in his Canadian starfish [Followup]

Friday 3 February 3:50:06 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Things You Might Not Know About Bill Belichick

Friday 3 February 2:30:00 UTC 2017

He was once under FBI protection. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Rival gang member slaps the living shiat out of dead man at his funeral [Dumbass]

Friday 3 February 1:50:06 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Pick the Correct Body Phrase For Each Definition

Friday 3 February 1:43:08 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this ultra first class section [Photoshop]

Friday 3 February 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Sarcastic Jokes Found on Roman Bullets

Friday 3 February 1:00:00 UTC 2017

Ancient Greek and Roman soldiers used football-shaped lead bullets as ammunition for their slingshots. These projectiles could wreak havoc on their targets, but the soldiers weren't content to merely wound their enemies. They also taunted them by inscribing insults and sarcastic jokes on their bullets. [Link]

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