John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Austrian collector claims to have nude pictures of Eva Braun frolicking with the kangaroos outside Adolf's summer home (not safe for work) [Unlikely]

Tuesday 29 November 23:50:04 UTC 2016

Unlikely [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Literary Man Hotel in Portugal Is Home to 45,000 Books

Tuesday 29 November 23:30:00 UTC 2016

They aim to have 100,000 books by the end of the year. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » San Francisco's Millennium Tower is now more like 994 Tower [Scary]

Tuesday 29 November 23:20:04 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman who stole Magic Mike DVD, salami from Walmart says: "It's hard times" [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 22:50:04 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Def Leppard drummer wanted in connection with a robbery [Strange]

Tuesday 29 November 22:40:45 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There are crappy landlords, and then there are landlords who refuse to fix the lake of raw sewage in your yard [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 22:16:45 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [76 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Totally Innovative Takes on Activity Trackers

Tuesday 29 November 21:50:12 UTC 2016

Activity trackers are the top fitness trend of 2017—try one of these cutting edge varieties on for size. [Link]

Mental Floss » Patagonia to Donate $10 Million in Black Friday Sales to Environmental Causes

Tuesday 29 November 21:50:11 UTC 2016

The company made five times more than was expected. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you're looking for more realistic Christmas Cards this year, you can get The Three Wise Men and the Drone Strike or Joseph and Mary fleeing Aleppo [Obvious]

Tuesday 29 November 21:50:05 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Pick the Geographic Locations of the 30 NBA Teams

Tuesday 29 November 21:49:49 UTC 2016

Take the quiz! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Millennials aren't going to save us. Rorschach nods approvingly [Obvious]

Tuesday 29 November 21:44:04 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [137 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fight between two women turns parking lot into demolition derby. Wait, wasn't this a Malcolm in the Middle episode? [Stupid]

Tuesday 29 November 21:20:04 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [80 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Tennis Match: Silhouette Edition [Photoshop]

Tuesday 29 November 21:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man wins Vincent Van Gogh lookalike contest. I SAID MAN WINS VINCENT VAN GOGH LOOKALIKE CONTEST [Silly]

Tuesday 29 November 20:50:04 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Most Populous City in Each State

Tuesday 29 November 20:40:38 UTC 2016

Take the quiz! [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the Basilisk Victims in 'Chamber of Secrets'

Tuesday 29 November 20:40:17 UTC 2016

[Link]

Mental Floss » Scientists Reveal the Secrets of the Capuchin Catacomb Mummies

Tuesday 29 November 20:30:00 UTC 2016

The crypt has long been a religious site and morbid tourist attraction. But only recently has it also become a place for serious science. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ark Encounter to soon feature historical recreation of Roman gladiators fighting dinosaurs in the arena. This is all in the Bible if you look closely, and is in no way a cross-promotion stunt with Ark: Survival Evolved [Stupid]

Tuesday 29 November 20:20:04 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Vintage Sandwiches You Can Make Today

Tuesday 29 November 20:00:00 UTC 2016

These have failed to stand the test of time. [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the TV Show From the 3-Word Clue

Tuesday 29 November 19:56:35 UTC 2016

Take the quiz! [Link]

Mental Floss » A Japanese Hot Spring Haven Wants to Build a 'Spamusement' Park

Tuesday 29 November 19:30:00 UTC 2016

Beppu, Japan—already famous for its hot springs—wants to make itself even more of a tourist destination. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » As Jesus said, Let he who has not faked his own kidnapping after a drug-fueled binge with transgender prostitutes cast the first stone [Hero]

Tuesday 29 November 19:20:04 UTC 2016

Hero [link] [68 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » PEI police to impose stricter punishment on drunk drivers by subjecting them to endless Nickelback while detained [Spiffy]

Tuesday 29 November 18:50:04 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Square Dancing

Tuesday 29 November 18:46:27 UTC 2016

[Link]

Mental Floss » Amazon Is Still Rolling Out Incredible Cyber Week Deals

Tuesday 29 November 18:46:19 UTC 2016

Black Friday and Cyber Monday may have passed, but the great deals keep coming. [Link]

Mental Floss » World Cities Recreated in Toilet Paper Rolls

Tuesday 29 November 18:30:00 UTC 2016

To raise awareness for global sanitation issues, artist Anastassia Elias creates tiny worlds within toilet paper rolls. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mini monkeys found safe after abduction. Tiny Mike Nesmith says everything's fine [Cool]

Tuesday 29 November 18:20:05 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [34 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » FMZiggy says FML

Tuesday 29 November 18:18:27 UTC 2016

Today, safety inspectors have deemed our basement unfit to serve as a bedroom due to a fire hazard. Our bed is now in the living room. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Drones Are Being Tested as the Home Security Systems of Tomorrow

Tuesday 29 November 18:00:00 UTC 2016

A future in which homeowners display “Beware of Drone” signs on their property may not be too far off. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you know someone who was murdered, currently driving on Kirkman Road, the Orlando police are following you right now [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 17:54:43 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Out of my way, peasants; I don't have to wait for offboarding like the rest of you low lifes [Amusing]

Tuesday 29 November 17:50:04 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today in the annals of "what sane human would consider this a good idea?" – a man biking along the handrail of a 650-foot tall dam [Scary]

Tuesday 29 November 17:20:05 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Meet Eero, the System That Will Change Your Wi-Fi Experience

Tuesday 29 November 17:00:00 UTC 2016

Eero's units create a mesh network—basically a data highway—that delivers fast and reliable service. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Someone has been sleeping in my bed, said baby bear, and he's still here…and naked [Strange]

Tuesday 29 November 16:50:04 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Coat Turns Into a Sleeping Bag for the Homeless

Tuesday 29 November 16:30:00 UTC 2016

The EMPWR jacket has been donated to more than 15,000 individuals since 2012. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Local school board adds "drugs" to its standardized testing regimen [Asinine]

Tuesday 29 November 16:20:09 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [161 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » An Unfortunate Error

Tuesday 29 November 16:00:42 UTC 2016

Marshall George Cummings, Jr. of Oklahoma was charged with snatching a purse from a woman on October 14, 1976. His case came to trial in January 1977, and Cummings asked to represent himself, which the court allowed. However, during the cross-examination of witnesses, Cummings proceeded to make what the state later described as an "unfortunate error." He conducted the cross-examination … [Link]

Mental Floss » Scientists Figure Out Why Many Returning Astronauts Need Glasses

Tuesday 29 November 16:00:00 UTC 2016

The zero-G lifestyle does funny things to our bodily fluids. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Attending church and being surrounded by religious believers is just as addictive as heroin, claims neuroscientist [Obvious]

Tuesday 29 November 15:50:04 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [171 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Clever Moments of TV Foreshadowing You Might Have Missed

Tuesday 29 November 15:30:00 UTC 2016

Spoiler alert! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Store Daily Deal: Asus Eeebook X205TA Windows 8.1 Notebook – Refurbished – $149.99. (Sponsored Link) [Plug]

Tuesday 29 November 15:24:50 UTC 2016

Plug [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Great. Now there will be a moon base gap [Cool]

Tuesday 29 November 15:20:05 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [120 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Amazon Shaves Razor Blade Prices to Ridiculous Lows

Tuesday 29 November 14:59:46 UTC 2016

From the Smart Shopping Team… [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Smokyland Motel lives up to its name in this photo in an article about wildfires in Tennessee [Scary]

Tuesday 29 November 14:36:22 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Mind-Boggling Puzzle Has No Beginning or End

Tuesday 29 November 14:30:00 UTC 2016

The Infinite Galaxy Puzzle leaves room for creativity. [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Although Cats in Beverly Hills Have Major Bulimia

Tuesday 29 November 14:13:15 UTC 2016

Coworker #1: Check out this cat stroller!
Coworker #2: If cats need strollers, no wonder us humans are so fat. Farmington Hills, Michigan [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Theme: Create the flag of your own nation [Photoshop]

Tuesday 29 November 14:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » First he makes you wait 5-7 seconds at a stop sign, then he flips you the bird when you honk at him. Good thing you have that .45 under the seat of the Audi you stole, isn't it, son? With mugshot of the year contender [Stupid]

Tuesday 29 November 13:50:04 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [170 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Little Facts About Louisa May Alcott

Tuesday 29 November 13:30:00 UTC 2016

The 'Little Women' author was also an early suffragette and Civil War nurse. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Famed internet blogger Casey Neistat gets bought out by CNN for $25 million in an attempt to bring "authenticity" to CNN [Silly]

Tuesday 29 November 13:20:05 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Tasmanian whisky flies off shelves after being named world's best single malt, as state's 22 distillers can barely keep up with demand. If only we could animate exactly how Tasmanian whisky is flying off shelves [Spiffy]

Tuesday 29 November 12:30:25 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [54 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » World’s Oldest Person Turns 117. Her Secret? Raw Eggs

Tuesday 29 November 12:30:00 UTC 2016

Emma Morano is the last living person who was born in the 19th century. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Marijuana users "have abnormally low blood flow in every part of the brain – including Alzheimer's danger zones." Wait… What was I talking about again? [Interesting]

Tuesday 29 November 12:27:57 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [204 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Square Dancing

Tuesday 29 November 12:15:00 UTC 2016

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Killing bears in NJ reduces the chances of bear attacks. Don't worry, a lot of research went into this conclusion [Obvious]

Tuesday 29 November 12:00:27 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Celebrate the Holidays With Festive 'Star Wars' Nutcrackers

Tuesday 29 November 12:00:00 UTC 2016

Since you can't use the Force to open walnuts. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Actual Headline: Homeschool mom crushed by 'moral dilemma' after son sees male CoverGirl wearing makeup [Obvious]

Tuesday 29 November 11:55:00 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [232 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Brilliant Gifts for the Teacher in Your Life

Tuesday 29 November 11:30:00 UTC 2016

Teachers spend all year giving their all to students. Show them some love with these gifts. [Link]

Weird Universe » Throwing the Hood

Tuesday 29 November 11:09:00 UTC 2016

Full story here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Gee, why wouldn't you want your identity publicly known when you're on the jury of a murder trial against a cop? [Followup]

Tuesday 29 November 11:05:08 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: The Short-Lived Gävle Goat

Tuesday 29 November 10:30:00 UTC 2016

Get a head start on websurfing with these links! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japan offers senior drivers discount ramen for life at any Japanese Farmer's Market if they voluntarily give up their driver's licenses [Cool]

Tuesday 29 November 10:03:45 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "The destruction took off on social media, where witnesses posted videos and photos of shoppers kicking aside shoe boxes and wading through the dystopian wasteland" [Scary]

Tuesday 29 November 10:01:57 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Stupid new online challenge has naked people trying to cover all their naughty bits using only a single digit. Enjoy The One Finger Selfie Challenge (probably Not safe for work) [Giggity]

Tuesday 29 November 9:14:00 UTC 2016

Giggity [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Aussie Walter Matthau kills Aussie Jack Lemmon. No word on if he was venomous [Strange]

Tuesday 29 November 8:56:34 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You should try eating Key Deer before they're all screwed [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 8:26:57 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [16 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » CloroxDoggo says FML

Tuesday 29 November 8:16:58 UTC 2016

Today, I was meeting up with a friend in a town. He said he was at the restaurant we were going to meet at; I was too. Turns out I was in the wrong town. FML [Link]

FMyLife » luceeloo says FML

Tuesday 29 November 8:16:56 UTC 2016

Today, I spent my working day teaching my new Supervisor the basics of Excel. Until two weeks ago, he was the Office Junior. He and I applied for the same job, but he got it based on the strengths of his "far superior" Excel skills. I'm now teaching him how to do the job that I didn't get. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Plane with 80 Brazilian people crashes [News]

Tuesday 29 November 7:51:27 UTC 2016

News [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Legerdemain

Tuesday 29 November 6:53:48 UTC 2016

Apart from being mathematically true, ONE + TWELVE = TWO + ELEVEN is also famously an anagram — the same group of letters appears on each side of the expression. In numerical form (1 + 12 = 2 + 11) it’s both an anagram and a palindrome — the same numerals appear on either side of the equal sign, and … [Link]

Mental Floss » St. Petersburg, Florida Pledges to Run Exclusively on Renewable Energy

Tuesday 29 November 6:30:00 UTC 2016

It will be the first city in Florida to do so. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A good heist involves a cunning getaway plan. Sadly, Florida Man's "hide in a pond and claim he's fishing" ploy didn't count [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 5:48:55 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dollywood evacuated, will now be the subject of a soon to be released Hallmark Channel special [Scary]

Tuesday 29 November 5:29:30 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [226 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cops seek owner of well-dressed lost dog [Amusing]

Tuesday 29 November 4:53:42 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [15 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » S says FML

Tuesday 29 November 4:51:51 UTC 2016

Today, the district manager visited. Also today, I got called into the office to talk about "personal hygiene". The assistant store manager asked me if I had some kind of medical problem and advised me to shower regularly because my co-workers have been making comments. FML [Link]

FMyLife » porcelainleigh says FML

Tuesday 29 November 4:51:50 UTC 2016

Today, I got engaged. I called my mom and told her. "You didn't say yes, did you?" she said. Afterwards, I told my dad. "Uh, Congratulations. But, I have questions." Thanks guys. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Calgary Police sued for $600,000 after false perjury charges laid against a man who will coincidentally be shot during a traffic-stop gone bad sometime next week [Dumbass]

Tuesday 29 November 4:50:47 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Venezuela's currency is so devalued that it's going to solve the toilet paper shortage [Interesting]

Tuesday 29 November 3:50:05 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » McDonald's rolls out battered and deep fried cheese curds. Only in Wisconsin [Spiffy]

Tuesday 29 November 3:47:01 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And the word of the year is… [Sad]

Tuesday 29 November 3:32:38 UTC 2016

Sad [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Like, literally [Interesting]

Tuesday 29 November 3:32:03 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That sinkhole that Japan fixed in a week is broken again. Maybe they should try percussive maintenance [Fail]

Tuesday 29 November 3:10:05 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Remember that scene in Indiana Jones where Indy used a lighter to see in a dark catacomb? Well, remember: A) You're not Indiana Jones, B) Your mobile home isn't a catacomb, and C) Couches are flammable [Dumbass]

Tuesday 29 November 2:30:05 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Israel decides they don't want to be left out of the fun in Syria. I bet no one will have a problem with this [Followup]

Tuesday 29 November 2:20:30 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "OK, Google, tell me how to get to Dump Tower" [Silly]

Tuesday 29 November 2:06:27 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [30 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » PinkMonkeys says FML

Tuesday 29 November 1:54:48 UTC 2016

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by sending me flowers that said, "I just need some space, forever. I hope I never see you again, even if you were a great person. It's not you it's me." FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Breaking News: Trump wins Wisconsin. Other Breaking News: Nobody gives a shiate because the election was over 3 weeks ago [Followup]

Tuesday 29 November 1:50:05 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [174 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » PSA: When prepping for Doomsday, remember the most important thing of all: Lock Your Doors [Fail]

Tuesday 29 November 1:40:35 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 4 Ideas From Linguistics to Help You Appreciate 'Arrival'

Tuesday 29 November 1:30:00 UTC 2016

The most exciting thing about Denis Villeneuve’s new sci-fi space-encounter movie isn’t the aliens or the spaceships or the worldwide panic they bring on. It’s the fact that the hero is a linguistics professor! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Accused face-biter's Google searches are even more bizarre than you imagined [Florida]

Tuesday 29 November 1:10:05 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this little dancer [Photoshop]

Tuesday 29 November 1:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Inside the municipal court cash machine [Interesting]

Tuesday 29 November 0:30:05 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [40 comments] [Link]

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