John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » I'll see your Swedish chef that looks like Trump and up it with a Chinese pheasant that sports the same hairstyle [Amusing]

Monday 14 November 23:50:05 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Lonely? This 7-Foot-Tall Inflatable Unicorn Will Keep You Company

Monday 14 November 23:30:00 UTC 2016

Seeing is believing. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The must-have toy that is every parents' nightmare this Christmas is the Hatchimal egg that is so popular it has already sold out [Facepalm]

Monday 14 November 23:20:05 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You know, it doesn't really count as environmentally friendly if you just push your houseboat into the sea and hope for the best [Strange]

Monday 14 November 22:50:04 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The World's Countries Swapped According to Their Population

Monday 14 November 22:30:00 UTC 2016

What it would look like if every country's land mass reflected its population? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Marooooooooned [Sad]

Monday 14 November 22:20:05 UTC 2016

Sad [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Science Behind Four Popular Diets

Monday 14 November 22:09:00 UTC 2016

This video breaks down the science (and pseudoscience) of the Atkins, paleo, master cleanse, and other diets. [Link]

Mental Floss » 7 Morning Habits That Can Affect Your Entire Day

Monday 14 November 22:00:00 UTC 2016

Set the right tone for the rest of the day by following these expert-approved tips. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chinese zoo admits using Siberian huskies as fake wolves. Zoo keepers said there was little physical difference between the two animals, although the huskies taste far better [Dumbass]

Monday 14 November 21:48:01 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Introducing a Travel Mug That Makes K-Cup Coffee

Monday 14 November 21:00:51 UTC 2016

Want coffee on-the-go? Just open the lid, pour in some water, and stick a coffee pod inside. [Link]

Mental Floss » Can Members of the Electoral College Reverse the Results of a Presidential Election?

Monday 14 November 21:00:50 UTC 2016

Every four years, people talk about the oddness of the Electoral College. And just like in 2000, the last time there was a popular vote/Electoral College mismatch, some citizens have decided to attempt to flip electors from Donald Trump to either Hillary Clinton or a third candidate (if enough electors go to the third candidate, the House would then have … [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the Category That Fits All Three Items

Monday 14 November 21:00:49 UTC 2016

Take the quiz! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Tennis Match: Glacier Edition [Photoshop]

Monday 14 November 21:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Wife brings wrench to fight. Husband brings sword. Wife wins (with mugshot) [Florida]

Monday 14 November 20:50:04 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Train robberies down by 90℅. Hipsters turn to cattle rustling to satisfy their vintage crime needs [Interesting]

Monday 14 November 20:20:05 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Ready-Made

Monday 14 November 20:18:22 UTC 2016

Australia was named before it was discovered. Ancient geographers had supposed that land in the north must be balanced by land in the south — Aristotle had written, “there must be a region bearing the same relation to the southern pole as the place we live in bears to our pole” — and Romans told legends of a Terra Australis … [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Attempts to Build Better Mousetraps

Monday 14 November 19:50:55 UTC 2016

With thousands of mousetrap patents in the United States, it seems people can’t resist innovating new ways to slay vermin. [Link]

Mental Floss » Don't Miss Out on Monday's Best Amazon Deals

Monday 14 November 19:50:47 UTC 2016

As a recurring feature, our team combs the Web and shares some amazing Amazon deals we’ve turned up. Here’s what caught our eye today, November 14. [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Epic Animal Migrations (and How to See Them)

Monday 14 November 19:50:46 UTC 2016

Amazing journeys that every wildlife enthusiast should witness in person. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Four conservative Catholic cardinals, who seem to be more than a little unclear on how a monarchy works, exactly, issue a letter challenging Pope Francis' teachings on marriage and the family [Asinine]

Monday 14 November 19:46:45 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [114 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » merchgirl says FML

Monday 14 November 19:30:28 UTC 2016

Today, my mother-in-law scheduled her neck surgery for the same day our baby is being born. She also fully expects my husband to drive her to the hospital and stay for her recovery. Uh, yeah no. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Your Traditional Thanksgiving Should Include Oysters

Monday 14 November 19:30:00 UTC 2016

The first Thanksgiving may not have even had turkey, but it almost certainly had oysters. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Californians vote to ban plastic grocery bags across the state. Plastic to stay only where it belongs – in Hollywood [Followup]

Monday 14 November 19:16:45 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [247 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 8 Surprising Tales of Human-Bear Encounters

Monday 14 November 19:13:36 UTC 2016

These meetings didn't go as either party expected. [Link]

Mental Floss » Hayao Miyazaki Comes Out of Retirement to Direct His Final Feature

Monday 14 November 19:00:00 UTC 2016

The animation legend is officially unretired (again). [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Swedish chef under attack for looking like Donald Trump [Unlikely]

Monday 14 November 18:50:05 UTC 2016

Unlikely [link] [127 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » What Goes in the Empty Box?

Monday 14 November 18:29:39 UTC 2016

Hint: It's not six. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » All humor contains an element of pain, which is probably why this high school student thought handing out fake deportation letters was funny [Dumbass]

Monday 14 November 18:20:06 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [145 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark NotNewsletter: What's long and hard and has kept you up at night? [FarkBlog]

Monday 14 November 18:15:07 UTC 2016

FarkBlog [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Want to Marry a Canadian? There's an App for That

Monday 14 November 18:00:00 UTC 2016

Introducing Maple Match, the dating app that will pair you with a paramour from the land of snowshoes and syrup. [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Impressionistic Facts about Claude Monet

Monday 14 November 17:30:00 UTC 2016

He paid a gardener to dust his water lilies. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Russia finally gets their coal-powered aircraft carrier near Syria. Apparently they can't land planes on it, though [Fail]

Monday 14 November 17:20:05 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [175 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » McDonald’s Italy Introduces a Burger That’s Just Nutella Between Two Buns

Monday 14 November 17:17:59 UTC 2016

Thankfully, beef has been left out of the recipe. [Link]

Mental Floss » Amazon to Refund Parents Whose Children Made In-App Purchases Without Permission

Monday 14 November 17:15:00 UTC 2016

A federal judge ordered the company to set up a year-long payment system for the estimated $86 million in unauthorized in-app purchases made by kids. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's National Pickle Day, so be sure to give one to your significant other [Amusing]

Monday 14 November 16:50:04 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today's mad libs headline: "Celibate commune in west Michigan generates nostalgia" [Interesting]

Monday 14 November 16:20:05 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Area Code

Monday 14 November 15:52:30 UTC 2016

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Local reporting at its finest – an article about the 'Supermoon' visible over the UK tonight. "Weather permitting [it] will be visible without the need for a telescope" [Interesting]

Monday 14 November 15:50:04 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [65 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » joanikens says FML

Monday 14 November 15:42:16 UTC 2016

Today, I was so broke, I couldn't come up with enough change to pay the parking meter at my job. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Winning Facts About 'Hoosiers'

Monday 14 November 15:30:00 UTC 2016

2. Jack Nicholson really wanted to play the coach, and thinks the film would've been bigger had he starred in it. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "When officers arrived at the home, they found several wild animals all roaming freely inside including three tigers, a cougar, a skunk and a fox" [Asinine]

Monday 14 November 15:20:05 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This man will attempt to outdo Michael Phelps at something when it comes to swimming. He will try to swim across the Atlantic from Senegal to Brazil [Unlikely]

Monday 14 November 14:50:04 UTC 2016

Unlikely [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Tandem Smoker

Monday 14 November 14:38:55 UTC 2016

Introduced in 1955: Jonathon Law's Tandem Smoker, aka the "sure-fire lonesomeness ender."

"The inventor envisions each lonely man packing a Tandem Smoker. All he has to do is light up, offer a passerby a mouthpiece, and the device will do the rest."

Image source: Fuzzy Dave

Independent Press Telegram – Sep 30, 1956

And you too could soon be smoking in tandem, because … [Link]

Mental Floss » Literary Tights Display Classic Texts on Your Legs

Monday 14 November 14:30:00 UTC 2016

Wear the works of Jane Austen, Lewis Carroll, and Edgar Allan Poe as fashion statements. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cash-starved Indians struggling after currency ban, World Series loss [Followup]

Monday 14 November 14:20:05 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop what they are really auctioning off at Sotheby's [Photoshop]

Monday 14 November 14:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Remember When We Accidentally Took Out the Wrong Colon? Oh, We Laughed!

Monday 14 November 13:57:02 UTC 2016

[In the ER.]
Nurse #1: Oh my god.
Nurse #2: What?
Nurse #1, looking horrified: I just entered all of these notes on the wrong patient’s file.
Nurse #2: It’s okay. Just go back, delete, and re-enter them for the right patient.
Nurse #1, distressed at herself: But that’s awful! What would have happened?
Nurse #2, shrugging: ‘s’okay, happens all the time. Hospital
Beckley, West Virginia [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woodcocks crashing into UK's glass buildings [Strange]

Monday 14 November 13:50:04 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Handy Facts About the History of Handwriting

Monday 14 November 13:30:00 UTC 2016

Even handwriting scholars can't read all scripts. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dear Deidre, I'm having sex with my boyfriend and my ex-boss. Boyfriend treats me well and wants marriage, but I'm hesitant to commit, as ex-boss is a hot 41 and I'm addicted to his fantastic lovemaking skills. What should I do? [Giggity]

Monday 14 November 13:04:20 UTC 2016

Giggity [link] [124 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 129: The Voynich Manuscript

Monday 14 November 12:45:13 UTC 2016


In 1912, bookseller Wilfrid Voynich discovered an illustrated manuscript that was written in a mysterious alphabet that had never been seen before. The text bears the hallmarks of natural language, but no one has ever been able to determine its meaning. In this week’s episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll learn about the Voynich manuscript, which has been bewildering … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Peanut the Giant Panda takes her first steps [Amusing]

Monday 14 November 12:28:33 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Area Code

Monday 14 November 12:15:00 UTC 2016

[Link]

FMyLife » Knittedbirch says FML

Monday 14 November 12:01:25 UTC 2016

Today, my mom volunteered me to house-sit for one of her friends. This lady has texted me over ten times in less than 24 hours, called me unreasonable for not dropping jury duty to meet with her, and has messaged my mom multiple times to complain about me. My mom already said I would do this for free. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Oops_Im_Blushing says FML

Monday 14 November 12:01:24 UTC 2016

Today my date kept offering to drop me off back home because he thought I wasn't enjoying myself at the dance. I wasn't enjoying myself at the dance because he kept asking if I wanted to leave. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Nostalgic Gifts Based on Children's Book Classics

Monday 14 November 11:30:00 UTC 2016

You don't have to be a kid to love Babar the elephant. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Donald is not a Trump or a Drumpf, instead he is Dawood Ibrahim Khan born to a Muslim family in Pakistan [Unlikely]

Monday 14 November 11:09:41 UTC 2016

Unlikely [link] [156 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » The Tamburitza

Monday 14 November 11:05:00 UTC 2016

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Wolf howls at loon, house dressing really becomes house dressing, and auto-erotic asphyxiation: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 11/6 – 11/12 [FarkBlog]

Monday 14 November 11:04:44 UTC 2016

FarkBlog [link] [3 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Get Ready for the Flu

Monday 14 November 10:30:00 UTC 2016

10 Misconceptions About the Flu. The more you know, the better you can protect yourself -and the rest of us.
*
Beautiful Aerial Photographs of Magnificent Coastlines Around the World. Photographer Gabriel Scanu never leaves home without his drone camera.
*
9 Easy 3-Ingredient Appetizers To Make For Thanksgiving. Snacks to keep everyone busy while the turkey is cooking.
* … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man collects Over 1,200 pieces of prehistoric poop for a Guinness World Record. European Fecal Standards and Measurements to weigh in next week [Silly]

Monday 14 November 9:26:31 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In Iowa, it's front page news when a new Mexican restaurant opens [Silly]

Monday 14 November 8:47:20 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [99 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » kmtau says FML

Monday 14 November 8:46:42 UTC 2016

Today, I showed my grandma my new septum piercing. Her only response was, "I hope it gets infected and your nose falls off." FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nursing home residents overdose on heroin, so the home gets fined instead of prosecuted [Fail]

Monday 14 November 8:41:20 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Skateboarding Isn't Just a Sport—It's a Science

Monday 14 November 8:30:00 UTC 2016

Learn how basic concepts like gravity, friction, and force help your favorite pro skaters accomplish their feats. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "A new nationwide survey has found that men in their 20s are spending more on clothes, shoes and personal care than their female counterparts. Males in their 20s will splash an average of $493 every month to look good. $103 more than women" [

Monday 14 November 7:43:19 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [105 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » sieee says FML

Monday 14 November 7:18:43 UTC 2016

Today, I woke up and saw the ending of Trump's victory speech. They played, 'You can't always get what you want' by the Stones. And indeed, we can't. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Innovative Fork Design Unexpectedly Helps Users With Limited Mobility

Monday 14 November 6:30:00 UTC 2016

Knork flatware is designed for everyone, but patients with limited hand mobility have found the easy-to-use designs particularly valuable. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cool, going to Chili's to get a free Veterans Day meal? Got your Military ID, Check, Got your Discharge Papers, Check? Hey, not so fast there, black guy [Fail]

Monday 14 November 6:12:35 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [224 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trumpenführer is surprised to learn that being POTUS consists of more than State Dinners and blowjobs from the interns [Murica]

Monday 14 November 6:10:49 UTC 2016

Murica [link] [359 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How Much Will My New Baby Cost? 8 Things to Save For

Monday 14 November 5:30:00 UTC 2016

Presented by Allstate. [Link]

FMyLife » CanadianEH says FML

Monday 14 November 4:46:22 UTC 2016

Today, my dog ate my underwear. This is the twenty-seventh pair that he has eaten. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Expert claims chemtrails will wipe out humans, cause biblical-style floods. Yeah, sounds legit [Facepalm]

Monday 14 November 4:08:38 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [108 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Do you want ninjas? Because that's how you get ninjas [Silly]

Monday 14 November 4:01:32 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Christmas comes early for divorce lawyers: AdultFriendFinder hack discloses 300 million accounts [Giggity]

Monday 14 November 3:16:45 UTC 2016

Giggity [link] [85 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » daughter in law says FML

Monday 14 November 3:12:51 UTC 2016

Today, my husband and I finally had the house to ourselves, so we had unusually loud sex. Banging bed, yelling obscenities, super rowdy, etc. I then see my mother-in-law out the window. She had let herself in, dropped off a bag and apparently ran out. Thanksgiving is going to be weird. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Hey, remember that time I pulled you over for doing 107mph and then realized you were the police chief so I let you go? Ha ha. Yeah, good times" [Facepalm]

Monday 14 November 2:55:41 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [29 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » shutup shutup shutup don't wanna hear it says FML

Monday 14 November 2:04:53 UTC 2016

Today, my roommate told me that she was studying in the library. Turns out, she didn't feel like going to the library and just spent all afternoon studying in a friend's room because she didn't think I was capable of shutting up for long enough to get any work done. Our other friends agreed. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Watch Classic Monty Python Sketches Featuring Wordplay

Monday 14 November 1:30:00 UTC 2016

Michael Palin: "Do you enjoy [speaking only in anagrams?]" Eric Idle: "I stom certainly od. Revy chum so." [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this exciting athletic event [Photoshop]

Monday 14 November 1:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Years ago I found this from Fark. I look forward to it now. Thanks Farkers. Desert Bus for Hope [Hero]

Monday 14 November 0:21:19 UTC 2016

Hero [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Last call [Sad]

Monday 14 November 0:08:14 UTC 2016

Sad [link] [108 comments] [Link]

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