John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Josh Duggar had a paid Ashley Madison account. How touching [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 23:45:59 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [480 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Uranus Used To Be Called the Schoolyard-Friendly Name George

Wednesday 19 August 23:30:00 UTC 2015

Planet George wouldn't be the butt of nearly as many jokes as Uranus. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yo dawg, I heard you like typhoons in your typhoons so here's a typhoon in your typhoon [Scary]

Wednesday 19 August 23:29:07 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Striking Images of Twin Typhoons Captured from Space

Wednesday 19 August 23:00:00 UTC 2015

Two very big storms are brewing over the Pacific [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Headline: "Two deadly skydiving accidents in three days: How dangerous is parachuting?" Article: Not very [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 22:56:51 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fisherman scores big in Conception Bay [Giggity]

Wednesday 19 August 22:41:57 UTC 2015

Giggity [link] [20 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Underworld Health Organization Launches Initiative To Improve Incubus Immortality Rate

Wednesday 19 August 22:32:00 UTC 2015

THE SECOND CIRCLE, HELL—Affirming the need to reverse the trend after several millennia of discouraging numbers, officials from the Underworld Health Organization unveiled a new initiative Thursday to improve Hades’ incubus immortality rate. “It is simply unacceptable in this day and age that so many of our demon spawn never get the chance to metamorphose into evil spirits who spend … [Link]

Mental Floss » 17 Things You Might Not Know About 'The 40-Year-Old Virgin'

Wednesday 19 August 22:30:00 UTC 2015

The world's oldest virgin is turning 10. [Link]

Mental Floss » Giant "Sky Pool” to Be Built 10 Stories Above the Ground

Wednesday 19 August 22:00:00 UTC 2015

Soon, residents of two London apartment buildings will have the opportunity to swim above-ground—10 stories above ground, in a gigantic glass swimming pool. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 108-year-old man passes away 79 years after he was declared dead [Sad]

Wednesday 19 August 21:59:51 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "I'll have the giant blood red spider with a hideous genetic mutation for my nightmare please" [Scary]

Wednesday 19 August 21:43:51 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Most Interesting Comics of the Week

Wednesday 19 August 21:25:23 UTC 2015

Nanjing: The Burning City, Mox Nox, and more. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Brooklyn man who tried to avoid ticket by stealing traffic cop's penis charged with larceny, gets ticket anyway [Dumbass]

Wednesday 19 August 21:23:23 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Creflo Dollar, on why he needs a jet: It's a preacher thing, you wouldn't understand. A certain Preacher would likely beg to differ [Followup]

Wednesday 19 August 21:21:15 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [170 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sure this is probably sacrilege to you bacon purists but you can actually make decent crispy bacon in a microwave [Spiffy]

Wednesday 19 August 21:03:34 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [101 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How One Inventor Tried to Save America—With Roller Coasters

Wednesday 19 August 21:00:00 UTC 2015

With a max speed of 6 miles per hour, the first roller coaster in America was the ultimate (wholesome) thrill. [Link]

The Onion » Sports News in Brief: Redskins Maintain They Were Legally Granted Right To Name By 1807 Treaty Of Blackwater Creek

Wednesday 19 August 20:50:00 UTC 2015

WASHINGTON—Responding to widespread criticism from an increasing majority of Americans who find the team’s moniker offensive, Washington Redskins officials announced Wednesday that they were legally granted the right to use the name by the 1807 Treaty of Blackwater Creek. “What critics fail to understand is that the Redskins name was originally approved by Native American tribes in an effort to … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Anise seed is catnip for dogs. Your dog wants steak…marinated in anise [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 20:36:56 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Origins of 9 Royal Nicknames

Wednesday 19 August 20:30:00 UTC 2015

Many of Britain’s most famous monarchs are remembered by some nickname or soubriquet that has either long outlived them, or else has been bestowed on them posthumously by later historians. William I will forever be known as “William The Conqueror.” His red-headed son and successor William II was “William Rufus.” Both Edward VI and Henry VI were known as “The … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A man drunk and high on drugs decides to take a little joyride. Fark: In a forklift [Dumbass]

Wednesday 19 August 20:23:33 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [25 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Subway’s Jared Will Allegedly Plead Guilty To Child Porn

Wednesday 19 August 20:19:00 UTC 2015

Longtime Subway spokesman Jared Fogle will reportedly plead guilty to criminal charges related to the possession of child pornography, a development linked to a July 7 raid of Fogle’s home. What do you think?
[Link]

Overheard In The Office » The Way Hamsters Eat While They Nap

Wednesday 19 August 20:16:49 UTC 2015

Woman #1: Oh my god! My husband sent me three dozen roses for no reason!
Woman #2: Wow, someone really wants a blowjob.
Boss: Hey, you can’t say ‘blowjob’! We have young interns working here!
Woman #2: Are you serious? Those intern sluts give blowjobs in their sleep. New Jersey [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Can the Other Driver Sue for Slander? Discuss.

Wednesday 19 August 20:16:48 UTC 2015

Cabbie yelling out window to guy who cut him off: Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! [Gets out at red light, walks to offender’s car, points his butt at and simulates farting on the car, then gets back into cab and yells out window again.] You have … [Link]

Overheard In The Office » The Same Reason I Outline My Nipples in Sharpie

Wednesday 19 August 20:16:46 UTC 2015

Coworker #1: And then it just exploded all over my pants.Coworker #2: That sucks.Coworker #1: Well, the good news is that if someone mentions the stain on my pants I know that they are looking at my junk.Houston, Texas [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Who's polling 3% higher than Mike Huckabee and Scott Walker in NC? DEEZ NUTS [Facepalm]

Wednesday 19 August 20:04:53 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [136 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 20:02:40 UTC 2015

Today, my mom kissed me goodbye before I went to a big job interview. I got weird looks on the way there, but I figured it was just because I look like a massive douche in formal wear. Turns out my mom had smeared lipstick all over my chin. The person who finally let me know was my interviewer. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 20:02:39 UTC 2015

Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark at the Fair Oct 17, noon 'til the State Fair of Texas closes [FarkParty]

Wednesday 19 August 20:02:33 UTC 2015

FarkParty [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these purple kind of people [Photoshop]

Wednesday 19 August 20:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Making the Simpson Kitchen In Real Life

Wednesday 19 August 20:00:00 UTC 2015

This woman and her husband wanted to remodel their kitchen. So naturally, they decided to painstakingly recreate the Simpson family kitchen. They even nailed the corn cob drapes. Now they just need an upbeat neighbor to pop his head in the window. “Hi-dilly-ho, neighborinos!” * CoverGirl launched a Star Wars inspired line of makeup, so now you know what to … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The "Buffalo Bill" house from Silence of the Lambs is for sale. Would you buy it? I'd buy it. I'd buy it so hard [Creepy]

Wednesday 19 August 19:44:20 UTC 2015

Creepy [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What does God need with capitalism? [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 19:43:59 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [65 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Area Dad Informs Busboy He’s Ready To Order

Wednesday 19 August 19:40:00 UTC 2015

NASHUA, NH—Raising his arm into the air while leaning outward from the table in a bid to command attention from the other side of the restaurant, area father Walter Bierko called over a busboy at DiCapri’s Italian Eatery to inform him that he was ready to order, sources reported Wednesday. “Excuse me. Excuse me,” said the father of three to … [Link]

Mental Floss » You Can Buy Buffalo Bill's House from 'The Silence of the Lambs'

Wednesday 19 August 19:30:00 UTC 2015

Are you a fan of creepy fictional serial killers? Are you also in the market for a new home? Well, you're in luck. [Link]

Mental Floss » The Vietnamese Festival Where Ex-Lovers Reunite

Wednesday 19 August 19:14:16 UTC 2015

What might be some people's worst nightmare is a beloved, local tradition in the village of Khau Vai. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Our hotels feature a very nice pool, spacious rooms, and a safe big enough to fit a baby [Sad]

Wednesday 19 August 19:03:48 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Things You Might Not Know About Picasso’s 'The Old Guitarist'

Wednesday 19 August 19:00:00 UTC 2015

Don't be deceived by this seemingly simple painting of a man and his instrument. Pablo Picasso's The Old Guitarist has secrets in its past and in its paint. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Swedish death-metal band Ghost, fronted by the "anti-pope" Emeritus III is forced to reschedule a show in Philly set for same day as Pope Francis' is visit due to parking restrictions. The power of the Parking Authority compels you [Amusi

Wednesday 19 August 18:56:15 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hamas naval commandos arrest dolphin who spied for Israel – with helpful photograph of what an Israeli commando dolphin might look like [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 18:45:04 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hero: Georgia business owner decides to remove the confederate flag flying outside of his business. Asinine: And replaces it with a Swastika flag. Tag: Because it's "just a flag" [Murica]

Wednesday 19 August 18:43:52 UTC 2015

Murica [link] [115 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » We've all seen stories about bears taking a swim in residential pools to beat the heat. But how many then go have a relaxing soak in the adjacent hot tub? [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 18:30:05 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Data Scientist Computes the Ultimate European Road Trip

Wednesday 19 August 18:30:00 UTC 2015

45 landmarks in 14 days. Doable, just as long you don't stop to sleep. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "We put a Twinkie in this gun and we shoot it at you at 90 miles an hour and you try to catch it with a fish net" [Silly]

Wednesday 19 August 18:13:09 UTC 2015

Silly [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You know I would never interrupt you when you're getting a piece of wood [Sick]

Wednesday 19 August 18:04:18 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canada's Rhinoceros party releases platform, which includes nationalizing Tim Hortons, privatizing the Canadian military and monthly orgasms for voters [Spiffy]

Wednesday 19 August 18:03:12 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Rage Room Lets You Safely Smash Housewares For $20

Wednesday 19 August 18:00:00 UTC 2015

Occasionally, you just have to go a little 'Office Space' on something. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hilton to stop offering pornographic films. We'll always have Paris [Ironic]

Wednesday 19 August 17:39:44 UTC 2015

Ironic [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Who's to blame for the destruction of the middle class? Every one of you Farkers [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 17:36:39 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [144 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » A Potential New Treatment for Bats with Deadly White-Nose Syndrome

Wednesday 19 August 17:30:00 UTC 2015

The fungal infection has killed more than 5 million bats. Scientists are testing out a new treatment. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If a stripper says she's going to give you a ride home, she's lying [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 17:26:08 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Jared Fogle charged today. Guilty plea and sentencing hearing to follow. Meanwhile he has to stay a minimum of 500 subs away from elementary schools [Creepy]

Wednesday 19 August 17:19:01 UTC 2015

Creepy [link] [259 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drop your weapon and lie down on the…. Would you look at that; he just laid down [Asinine]

Wednesday 19 August 17:14:11 UTC 2015

Asinine [link] [112 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police arrest woman whose male infant children kept dying. No word if White Walkers were involved [Sick]

Wednesday 19 August 17:01:16 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Intriguing (and Occasionally Crazy) Harry Potter Fan Theories

Wednesday 19 August 17:00:00 UTC 2015

Some of these conjectures seem shockingly plausible, fitting perfectly within the events of the seven-book series and providing answers where Rowling’s original text has not; others are, to be blunt, totally bonkers—but fun all the same. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cool: Organizers are planning a city-wide "Day of Kindness" on October 27th to honor the Dalai Lama Unlikely: In Philadelphia [Fail]

Wednesday 19 August 16:50:12 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Motel 6: We'll leave the pilot light on for ya [Sad]

Wednesday 19 August 16:48:09 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » They say the suspect always returns to the scene of the crime, especially in Florida [Florida]

Wednesday 19 August 16:45:07 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [8 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you steal $8000 worth of jewelry, it's best not to wear some of it when being interviewed by the police. (with mugshot goodness) [Florida]

Wednesday 19 August 16:41:31 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two thieves rob a completely legitimate Philadelphia businessman at gunpoint, get away with $85,000-in cash, that the man was carrying in a duffel bag [Unlikely]

Wednesday 19 August 16:38:14 UTC 2015

Unlikely [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 7-year-old describes saving aunt's life: "She was drowning really bad, and I felt bad for her" [Hero]

Wednesday 19 August 16:35:30 UTC 2015

Hero [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Watch What Happens to Your Luggage at the Airport

Wednesday 19 August 16:30:00 UTC 2015

There's a little more turbulence, and a lot fewer people. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man wanted for…a) burglary…b) murder…or c) flying a pornographic paper airplane towards kids [Strange]

Wednesday 19 August 16:27:28 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Worker finishing new Tesla supercharger station gets full charging experience [Sad]

Wednesday 19 August 16:27:27 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Your annual "a lot of people will travel over the Labor Day Weekend" story has made its first appearance this year, almost three weeks ahead of the holiday [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 16:08:29 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Eat Batman Pizza at One of Malaysia's DC Comics-Themed Cafes

Wednesday 19 August 16:00:00 UTC 2015

Your pancakes are missing something—they don't have the bat symbol branded into them. [Link]

Mental Floss » C General Knowledge Quiz

Wednesday 19 August 16:00:00 UTC 2015

Take the quiz! [Link]

The Onion » News: Climate Change Deniers Present Graphic Description Of What Earth Must Look Like For Them To Believe

Wednesday 19 August 16:00:00 UTC 2015

WASHINGTON—Evoking cataclysmic scenes of extreme weather and widespread drought and famine, the nation’s climate change deniers held a press conference Wednesday to describe exactly what the Earth must look like before they will begin to believe in human-induced global warming.The group of skeptics, who said that the consensus among 97 percent of the scientific community and the documented environmental transformations … [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 15:58:26 UTC 2015

Today, a woman at the retirement home I work at told me she was new and asked me a few questions. I asked her when she moved in. She was a new coworker, not a new resident. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Great "Scott"

Wednesday 19 August 15:33:52 UTC 2015

[Link]

The Onion » Infographic: Why Westerners Join ISIS

Wednesday 19 August 15:24:00 UTC 2015

With more than 150 Americans accused of attempting to fight alongside ISIS in Syria and countless young Europeans allegedly joining or supporting the terrorist group, many are left wondering what a population of extremists has to offer Westerners a world away. Here are some reasons these people might want to ally with ISIS:Guaranteed job placement in fast-paced, high-growth field of … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Who's the perfect person to oversee the city's water supply? How about the guy who poisoned the water at his son's football game? [Asinine]

Wednesday 19 August 15:07:26 UTC 2015

Asinine [link] [84 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 24 American Behaviors Considered Rude in Other Countries

Wednesday 19 August 15:00:00 UTC 2015

Keep your shirt on! At least when you're in South Korea. Yes, even at the beach. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Indiana Jones was a wuss compared to this guy: Syrian archaeologist was tortured for months and eventually beheaded by ISIS because he refused to reveal the location of antiquities removed from Palmyra for safe-keeping [Hero]

Wednesday 19 August 14:57:14 UTC 2015

Hero [link] [148 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If your kids tell you you're too drunk to drive and they're afraid for their safety, do you A: Stop immediately? B: Call a taxi? or C: Leave kids on the side of the road and speed away? [Florida]

Wednesday 19 August 14:41:08 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Alternate-Universe Careers of 5 Celebrities

Wednesday 19 August 14:30:00 UTC 2015

Vincent Price, Candymaker? It could have happened… [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: New ‘Drinkable Book’ Could Provide Millions With Clean Water

Wednesday 19 August 14:30:00 UTC 2015

The “drinkable book,” a new filtration system with individual pages that can be torn out to purify containers of water, has completed its first round of field testing and could benefit many of the 700 million people worldwide who lack access to potable water. What do you think?
[Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Man Doing Karaoke Clearly Sings This One Every Time

Wednesday 19 August 14:12:00 UTC 2015

TAMPA, FL—Shaking their heads as he confidently eschewed the large binder of songs and recited his chosen track number by heart, patrons at karaoke bar Luna’s told reporters today that local man Steven Croucher obviously sings Fleetwood Mac’s “Little Lies” every single time he’s there. “God, this guy’s barely glanced at the lyrics scrolling on the screen and he hasn’t … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Half of all people between 18 and 24 say they are not 100% heterosexual. Apparently between straight, metrosexual, homosexual, transgender, and androgynous, no one really knows what they are anymore [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 14:04:27 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [397 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » What Was Money Like Before the Government Took Over?

Wednesday 19 August 14:00:00 UTC 2015

It was a lot more festive! Before the federal government started printing paper money in 1861, individual banks produced their own currency. Bank notes varied widely, but one figure in particular was popular: Santa Claus. The White Mountain Bank of New Hampshire, the Howard Banking Company of Massachusetts, and, naturally, the Saint Nicholas Bank of New York City all dispersed … [Link]

FMyLife » CoolCookie210 says FML

Wednesday 19 August 13:53:48 UTC 2015

Today, I learned that I am the only virgin in my group of friends. One of them is confined to a wheelchair. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Swedish beaver leaves thousands groping wildly in the dark [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 13:48:51 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [24 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 13:25:02 UTC 2015

Today, I am two months pregnant. Being super hormonal, I was crying about how much I was crying. My husband put his arms around me to comfort me, and I sobbed so hard that I threw up all over him. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this turbine touchup [Photoshop]

Wednesday 19 August 13:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [15 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » InterestingMuch says FML

Wednesday 19 August 12:49:48 UTC 2015

Today, my dad called to wish me a happy birthday. I said thank you but informed him that my birthday is tomorrow. He told me that I was wrong and screamed at me for 20 minutes. When I still wouldn't agree with him, he hung up and turned my phone service off. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why spend all that money on a babysitter when you want to go out on a Saturday night when you could just use plywood to make sure your children don't go outside while you're gone? [Florida]

Wednesday 19 August 12:42:31 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Times 'Star Trek' and Sherlock Holmes Overlapped

Wednesday 19 August 12:30:00 UTC 2015

Spock's admiration for Holmes may have a familial bias… [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And the next 11 states to legalize marijuana WILL BE…*drumroll*… (w/list) [Spiffy]

Wednesday 19 August 12:26:37 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [190 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Parents and students in an uproar after young strumpet sent home from school for showing *GASP* collarbone [Facepalm]

Wednesday 19 August 12:20:36 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [168 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man cut from washing machine trapped in vicious cycle [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 12:11:36 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Surprise, there's a golf cart lane where your residential street once was [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 12:00:31 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The real story of Alfred Packer, the wild west cannibal who became an unlikely fork hero [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 11:56:38 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Drunk-O-Meter Test Fizzles

Wednesday 19 August 11:53:37 UTC 2015

A great moment in the history of science. Arkansas, 1956.

Corsicana Daily Sun – June 8, 1956

‘Drunk-O-Meter’ Test Is Fizzle: Man Passes Out
HOT SPRINGS, Ark., June 8 — An attempt to test the accuracy of the "Drunk-O-Meter," a device used to measure the degree of intoxication of a person, ended in failure at Hot Springs.
The reason—the man engaged … [Link]

Weird Universe » At Home with Mrs. Hen

Wednesday 19 August 11:52:07 UTC 2015

At Home with Mrs. Hen by Tali, National Film Board of Canada

Illustrates the sad reality of single-parent families. Expect to see this shocking video feature in the 2016 Presidential campaign. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nope [Scary]

Wednesday 19 August 10:59:37 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [41 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » I hate games says FML

Wednesday 19 August 10:17:05 UTC 2015

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through charades. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man who can't use his arms has gun possession charge dropped, though police are still trying to get him charged with disobeying an officer's orders because he refused to raise his hands when told to [Followup]

Wednesday 19 August 10:12:32 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Ten Years After Katrina

Wednesday 19 August 9:30:45 UTC 2015

Ooh, look! Links! [Link]

Mental Floss » Great "Scott"

Wednesday 19 August 8:53:00 UTC 2015

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » New children's book uses psychology tricks to get your kids to GO THE FARK TO SLEEP [Cool]

Wednesday 19 August 8:28:00 UTC 2015

Cool [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Deadly love triangle at the La Quinta Inn, which is Spanish for 'Love Rectangle' [Scary]

Wednesday 19 August 7:55:28 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's America's most famous poem–and it doesn't mean what everybody thinks it means [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 7:45:00 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [144 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 7:19:32 UTC 2015

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 7:19:31 UTC 2015

Today, I was telling my dad how my boyfriend dumped me yesterday. He responded by blowing his nose into his hand, wiping it in my hair, then saying "There, a REAL problem to whine about." FML [Link]

FMyLife » Fartnonymous says FML

Wednesday 19 August 7:19:30 UTC 2015

Today, it's been a week since I started farting in my sleep for no apparent reason. It's so frequent and so foul-smelling that my husband and I are both losing sleep and are having to take afternoon naps to make up for it. FML [Link]

GraphJam » With Great Power Comes Dead Parents

Wednesday 19 August 7:18:08 UTC 2015

dead parents Death movies orphans superheroes - 3707217920 With Great Power Comes Dead Parents Graph by: NandoStevens Tagged: dead parents , Death , movies , orphans , superheroes Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things that go wrong in public restrooms

Wednesday 19 August 7:18:06 UTC 2015

bathroom public restroom situational humor - 1448335104 LoL by: Figueroaj85 Tagged: bathroom , public restroom , situational humor Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Uses for Your Old iPad

Wednesday 19 August 7:18:03 UTC 2015

ipad,mac,obsolete Graph by: (via Pleated Jeans) Tagged: ipad , mac , obsolete Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Have Them for My Contact Lenses, I Swear

Wednesday 19 August 7:18:01 UTC 2015

People Who Buy Eye Drops Graph by: sskrabal Tagged: allergies , eye drops , Pie Chart , stoners Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why Else Would You Be Closing It?

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:59 UTC 2015

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: closing , door , fap , mom , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Untitled

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:54 UTC 2015

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: infographic , mtv , Music , Party , so-yummy , television , tummy , yo gabba gabba Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:53 UTC 2015

and she was like conversations i was all like O.o Pie Chart said speech - 4052225792 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: and she was like , conversations , i was all , like , O.o , Pie Chart , said , speech Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What you see on Chatroulette

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:52 UTC 2015

chatroulette drugs frat boys genitalia ladyfunbags male men old Pie Chart stpners women Graph by: K0ilar Tagged: chatroulette , drugs , frat boys , genitalia , ladyfunbags , male , men , old , Pie Chart , stpners , women Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Damn Gary Busey videos…

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:47 UTC 2015

gary busey internet laptop battery Pie Chart Graph by: 44kaliberliebesbrief Tagged: gary busey , internet , laptop battery , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Chances of my smoke detector going off

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:39 UTC 2015

chance cooking fire kitchen pancakes smoke detector LoL by: CRPrankMonster Tagged: chance , cooking , fire , kitchen , pancakes , smoke detector Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things to Release at a Wedding

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:37 UTC 2015

Bar Graph best of week kraken marriage released wedding - 6391092736 Graph by: (via Coolness Graphed) Tagged: Bar Graph , best of week , kraken , marriage , released , wedding Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:36 UTC 2015

commonalities drummers murderface Pie Chart Ringo - 3913933568 Graph by: ericmolho Tagged: commonalities , drummers , murderface , Pie Chart , Ringo Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What happens to me when I don't send out chain messages

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:35 UTC 2015

Graph by: jojocheese Tagged: anothing , chain , chain letters , email , Hall of Fame , happens , messages , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » But Our Princess Is In Another Castle

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:33 UTC 2015

Graph by: Danieke (via bourgy.net) Tagged: Death , infographic , mario , Super Mario bros , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:29 UTC 2015

courtney love Jessica Simpson Joaquin Phoenix Pie Chart Spencer Pratt - 3966213120 Graph by: CherrySoda99 Tagged: courtney love , Jessica Simpson , Joaquin Phoenix , Pie Chart , Spencer Pratt Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Have Babies, ?, Profit

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:28 UTC 2015

Babies,expensive,Line Graph,profit,tlc Graph by: ElEspecial Tagged: Babies , expensive , Line Graph , profit , tlc Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:27 UTC 2015

drums high school marching band teen movies venn diagram - 3853758208 Graph by: ninjkabat Tagged: drums , high school , marching band , teen movies , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Deal or No Deal?

Wednesday 19 August 7:17:23 UTC 2015

deal,no-deal-tv,Pie Chart Graph by: LolzCheezBurger Tagged: deal , no-deal-tv , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Cocaine Dealer Most Upstanding Guy Wall Street Broker Knows

Wednesday 19 August 7:06:54 UTC 2015

NEW YORK—Highlighting the man’s trustworthiness, even temperament, and overall decency, Wall Street broker Simon Hansen revealed to reporters Monday that his cocaine dealer, Tim Arndt, is easily the most upstanding person he knows. “Tim’s a real professional, no question—he’s the only person I know who’s always there for me when I need him—but what really sets him apart is what … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nineteenth-century art collector was the original hipster [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 6:35:00 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » New York City Bagels From A-to-Z

Wednesday 19 August 6:30:00 UTC 2015

Because it's practically criminal to not know the definition of a good schmear. [Link]

Futility Closet » Invisible Man

Wednesday 19 August 6:01:23 UTC 2015

In 1888, as he began work on a new story called “The Chronic Argonauts,” H.G. Wells drew up an account of his literary successes to date: “Some day I shall succeed, I really believe,” he wrote, “but it is a weary game.” Please support Futility Closet on Patreon! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This whale has perfect comic timing [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 5:52:00 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 20 Nerd Heroes on Their Favorite Books

Wednesday 19 August 5:30:00 UTC 2015

Don't just take a page out of these celebrities' favorite books… read the whole thing! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drunk man tries to dig up his father's corpse so they can finish an argument because he really needed to have the last word [Creepy]

Wednesday 19 August 5:03:00 UTC 2015

Creepy [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hackers finally post all that stolen Ashley Madison data. Bonus: email addresses belonging to members of British government found [Followup]

Wednesday 19 August 4:36:00 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [245 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Things You Might Not Know About Dr Pepper

Wednesday 19 August 4:26:00 UTC 2015

You already know that Dr Pepper has a unique, spicy flavor, but did you know its corporate history is just as crisp and interesting? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » US spends $41 million to arm and train Syrian "freedom fighters" to become an elite team that can fight ISIS. Didn't we try something similar during the Reagan administration? And didn't that cause all of our problems in the Middle Ea

Wednesday 19 August 3:44:34 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [183 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently snarling stuffed Arctic wolves aren't very good at protecting themselves from being stolen [Weird]

Wednesday 19 August 3:38:30 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Bacteria-Killing Smartphone Charger You Didn’t Know You Needed

Wednesday 19 August 3:00:00 UTC 2015

This phone charger will also zap away bacteria. [Link]

Mental Floss » Summer Camp for Kids With Rare Disorder Comes to Life After Dark

Wednesday 19 August 2:30:00 UTC 2015

Camp Sundown caters to kids born with a rare disorder that leaves them sensitive to UV rays. [Link]

FMyLife » IrisKitty says FML

Wednesday 19 August 2:16:19 UTC 2015

Today, I found out my grandma sleeps in the nude. I witnessed her running naked from her bedroom to the bathroom, because she "didn't have enough time" to put on her robe. I need to get my own place. FML [Link]

FMyLife » LoveIsOneSided says FML

Wednesday 19 August 2:16:18 UTC 2015

Today, my dad remarried, but he didn't want me to come. I'm told he didn't want me to ruin his pictures or make his guests feel uncomfortable, all because I had my leg amputated in April. FML [Link]

FMyLife » jami898 says FML

Wednesday 19 August 2:16:17 UTC 2015

Today, I passed out. I fell to the hardwood floor, cut my chin, and bit through my lip. Fortunately, my brother was there to help stop the bleeding and get me some water. All I had to do was wait until he finished his game of Call of Duty. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » This Company Sends Imperfect Fruits and Vegetables to Your Home

Wednesday 19 August 2:00:00 UTC 2015

A new startup helps reduce food waste by rescuing misshapen—but still delicious—fruits and veggies. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Soon every company's website could have a 'shut up and take my money' button (not official title) [Interesting]

Wednesday 19 August 1:52:32 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If there's just one good cute ball of fur that can come from the flaming hell of the Tianjin explosion site let it be this adorable puppy [Sappy]

Wednesday 19 August 1:48:13 UTC 2015

Sappy [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Even school buses have WiFi now [Cool]

Wednesday 19 August 1:45:27 UTC 2015

Cool [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5-Year-Old Uses Robotic Hand to Throw First Pitch at Orioles Game

Wednesday 19 August 1:30:00 UTC 2015

Cutest/coolest pitcher ever. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some say Dos Equis modeled "the most interesting man in the world" after his life [Amusing]

Wednesday 19 August 1:03:31 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Bible Museum Features Rejected Celebrity Wax Figures

Wednesday 19 August 1:00:00 UTC 2015

Giving celebrity worship a whole new meaning. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » To thwart illegal migrants, Budapest turns to thousands of cannibalistic police who insist they're ready to take on the soylent majority [Spiffy]

Wednesday 19 August 0:52:34 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Member of "patriot" group "protecting" gun range that declared it was a Muslim-free establishment accidentally shoots self at said range [Obvious]

Wednesday 19 August 0:40:28 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [110 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Fascinating Facts About 'The Departed'

Wednesday 19 August 0:30:00 UTC 2015

15. Scorsese won his first (and so far only) Oscar for the movie. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Jared Fogle pleads guilty to getting into smaller pants [Stupid]

Wednesday 19 August 0:15:53 UTC 2015

Stupid [link] [209 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop the Doors [Photoshop]

Wednesday 19 August 0:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Clock Tells Time With "Lively Blobs" and Electromagnets

Wednesday 19 August 0:00:00 UTC 2015

It's like the grownup version of playing with iron dust and a magnet. [Link]

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