John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Sweden found a Russian submarine sunk within Swedish waters. The twist? Andrei did not report this one as lost [Strange]

Monday 27 July 23:52:17 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How to Appreciate Modern Art Like a Pro

Monday 27 July 23:39:24 UTC 2015

Feeling a little intimidated by the prospect of visiting galleries full of modern art? You're not alone. Luckily, Kathryn Potts of the Whitney Museum of American Art dropped by An Even Better You to tell us how to dive into the art scene. [Link]

Mental Floss » This Dog Is Helping a Baby Takin Get Ready to Join His Herd

Monday 27 July 23:39:23 UTC 2015

Blakely the dog helps socialize baby animals at the Cincinnati Zoo, including Dale, the one-month-old takin. [Link]

Mental Floss » Science Vindicates Middle School Nerds, Says Cool Kids Don’t Turn Out That Well

Monday 27 July 23:30:00 UTC 2015

A longitudinal study finds that the 13-year-olds with social cachet lose it by the time they're young adults. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not news: Big cat sanctuary in Denver raises prices. FARK: Tries to explain the price increase with greedy, racist, classist rant on Facebook wall. UltraFARK: Absolutely refuses to put down the shovel [Dumbass]

Monday 27 July 23:23:29 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » It’s All in My GlyphsNotes

Monday 27 July 23:18:42 UTC 2015

Student: Yeah, my name is Frank, but I go by Franco, only the ‘O’ isn’t an ‘O,’ it’s a sun glyph.NIC, CDA
Idaho [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Your Beautiful, Beautiful Hands

Monday 27 July 23:18:41 UTC 2015

Beauty shop owner: I need to know what day you'll be in to clean the floors, and you'd better stick to it or I'll kill you.Floor cleaner guy: I've got to die sometime… It might as well as be by your hands.Conroe, Texas [Link]

Overheard In The Office » 1PM Lunch

Monday 27 July 23:18:40 UTC 2015

Co-worker: We had Burger King breakfast in Mexico and it had refried beans and peppers in the eggs.
Manager: They were probably goat’s eggs, not chicken eggs. 9353 Jefferson Highway
Maple Grove, Minnesota [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Go Go Gadget Homophobic Armor!

Monday 27 July 23:18:34 UTC 2015

Male barista, startled by close stance of male trainees: Dude storm, dude storm!Cambridge, Massachusetts [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Boss: Excellent! The Employees Have Become Self-Punishing

Monday 27 July 23:18:33 UTC 2015

Clumsy coworker drops pile of files: Nobody look at me! I want to be alone!1300 York Avenue
New York, New YorkOverheard by: Jennifer [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Walmart employee celebrates his 103rd birthday with special party, hopes to save enough to retire by 105 [Spiffy]

Monday 27 July 23:08:20 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [22 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Not turnt says FML

Monday 27 July 23:04:00 UTC 2015

Today, I realized the only reason my mom trusts me to stay home alone for long periods of time is because I don't have enough friends to throw a party. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Afroman720 says FML

Monday 27 July 23:03:59 UTC 2015

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 27 July 23:03:58 UTC 2015

Today, I waited 45 minutes at the Apple Store for my grandpa to very loudly ask why PornHub wasn't loading on his computer. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Pivotal Technology Plot Points in 'The Net'—20 Years Later

Monday 27 July 23:00:00 UTC 2015

The 1995 Sandra Bullock film predicted we'd all be using high-speed Internet to get pizza. And kill things. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » World's largest ice cream cone unveiled in Norway, promptly causing brain-freeze for 9,000 people [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 22:56:21 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [6 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » East Portland unhappy at being locked out of 'Portlandia' world of flighty white hipsters, wants representation for their non-cool diversity. "There's a magical line around the city, and the core gets all the money and all the special

Monday 27 July 22:40:19 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » He's back. Look busy [Amusing]

Monday 27 July 22:32:02 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Jewelry Traps Tiny Worlds in Resin

Monday 27 July 22:30:00 UTC 2015

German jewelry designer Isabell Kiefhaber creates one-of-a-kind scenes in her resin rings. [Link]

Mental Floss » Driverless Cars Touted as the Future in this 1971 Video

Monday 27 July 22:00:00 UTC 2015

Earlier this year, Google announced its plans to start getting their self-driving cars out on real roads around Mountain View, California (with human drivers on board to serve as fail-safes, at first). But even if these pod-like vehicles find instant and widespread popularity, our society will still be at least 15 years behind what the ambitious engineers of 1971 predicted. … [Link]

Overheard In The Office » And That Was Just for the Left One

Monday 27 July 21:55:27 UTC 2015

Chick #1: That’s a really nice dress. How much did it cost?
Chick #2: Oh, um, $3500.
Chick #1: $3500! For a sun dress?!
Chick #2: Oh! You said “dress.” I thought you said “breasts.” 3200 Fifth Avenue
Sacramento, California Overheard by: Snarfed my Soda [Link]

Fark.com RSS » People in West Virginia are really upset about pepperoni rolls [Amusing]

Monday 27 July 21:52:52 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [88 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japanese women go on increasingly popular moss-viewing expeditions with loupe in hand. "Seeing clusters of mosses living together, I can forget about our competitive society" [Weird]

Monday 27 July 21:52:17 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Would You Drink Beer Flavored With Live Lobster?

Monday 27 July 21:30:00 UTC 2015

Inventive breweries are going to wild ends in their attempts to make beer better (or at least, weirder). We've told you about an ice cream-flavored beer, one made with real Sriracha, beer that's been to space, and even iced coffee that tastes like beer. But this latest offering, from Oxbow Brewery in Newcastle, Maine, pushes the boundaries of what you … [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Historic (and Fascinating) New Orleans Bars

Monday 27 July 21:00:00 UTC 2015

Laissez les bon temps rouler. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Patrick Stewart explains why we need robots that collect whale snot, which raises two questions: "Why?" and "Whales have noses?" [Followup]

Monday 27 July 20:58:21 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [57 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Boy Scouts To Lift Ban On Gay Leaders

Monday 27 July 20:55:00 UTC 2015

To combat declining membership and amend relationships with donors, the Boy Scouts of America will begin accepting openly gay adults in leader positions, though the organization says religiously affiliated troops may continue selecting heterosexual leaders to align with their values. What do you think?
[Link]

Overheard In The Office » What Happens When You Think About Things that Don’t Bear Thinking About

Monday 27 July 20:53:34 UTC 2015

IT guy: Oh, good I’m back to the top of your favorite people list.Sales assistant: What? William* the hot A/C guy got bumped down?IT guy: William’s gone; he’s off the list.Sales guy: Isn’t William a gerbil?Sales assistant: That’s my gerbil! We’re talking about the A/C guy now.Sales guy: Ask Peter* about gerbil; he likes ’em.IT guy: Ed breeds the gerbils.Sales … [Link]

Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Pee-wee's Big Anniversary

Monday 27 July 20:30:00 UTC 2015

Paul Reubens (a.k.a. Pee-wee Herman) celebrated the 30th anniversary of the fantastic film Pee-wee’s Big Adventure by releasing some never-before-public shots of the making of it. * Intriguing Headline of the Day: The Strangely Successful History of People Mailing Themselves in Boxes * Good Question: What would happen if the Earth’s core cooled down? * These restaurants make their restroom … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Couple gets caught having sex in a phone booth; says they thought no one would notice. Where the hell did they find a phone booth? (with not safe for work pic) [Giggity]

Monday 27 July 20:27:05 UTC 2015

Giggity [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Russian bombers approach U.S. airspace to wish fighter pilots a happy Independence Day, turn tail once fighters offer to help Russians celebrate a Mayday [Followup]

Monday 27 July 20:12:42 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [123 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Infographic: Airbnb Vs. Hotels

Monday 27 July 20:12:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Please note: raccoons can only fly in movies, and should be kept away from open windows [Strange]

Monday 27 July 20:04:19 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this good ol' boy [Photoshop]

Monday 27 July 20:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » A Smaller Staircase Just for Dogs

Monday 27 July 20:00:00 UTC 2015

Stairs have long been a nemesis and hated obstacle for tiny dogs. [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: GOP Candidates Offered Cash Voucher To Give Up Spot And Participate In Later Election

Monday 27 July 19:59:00 UTC 2015

WASHINGTON—Noting that the field of presidential hopefuls currently exceeded maximum capacity, the Republican National Committee announced Monday it was offering a cash voucher to any GOP candidates willing to give up their spot in the 2016 race and run again in a later election. “We’re unfortunately unable to accommodate every candidate in our current primary race, so we’re offering $2.5 … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » CDC closed due to possibly contaminated water [Ironic]

Monday 27 July 19:56:28 UTC 2015

Ironic [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Darwin doesn't like the confederate flag either [Murica]

Monday 27 July 19:56:04 UTC 2015

Murica [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police responding to report of human torso on side of road find brisket instead [Strange]

Monday 27 July 19:55:44 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Why Her Friends Stopped Letting Her Give Wedding Toasts

Monday 27 July 19:52:06 UTC 2015

Female quality engineer: There is a fine line between wanting to hurt someone and having fun with them.Texas [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Swiss army invades France…. to give water to Swiss cows [Weird]

Monday 27 July 19:47:12 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Murphy Behind Murphy's Law

Monday 27 July 19:30:00 UTC 2015

You know Murphy’s Law. You’ve probably even experienced it: Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. But who was the poor sap who had such a crappy law named after him? Enter Ed Murphy. The good news is, Murphy wasn’t the screw-up. The bad news is, Murphy was angry at someone who was. Back in the 1940s, the Air … [Link]

The Onion » Sports News: Tour De France Won By Rowdy, Tattooed Biker From Harley Davidson Team

Monday 27 July 19:10:00 UTC 2015

PARIS—In what many are calling the single most dominant performance in the 112-year history of the event, the 2015 Tour de France was won Sunday by Jason “Scab” Vickerson of the Harley Davidson Team.Sources confirmed that the 300-pound, tattoo-covered Scab, who occasionally works as a bouncer at various establishments in Lubbock, TX, handily won the 3,500-kilometer race through the Netherlands, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Road rage incident in Florida ends exactly the way you'd expect it to end [Florida]

Monday 27 July 18:52:39 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [393 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Old and busted: planking. New dumbness: Supermanning [Facepalm]

Monday 27 July 18:48:09 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » … Oh, Bottles of Scotch. What Did You Think I Was Talking About?

Monday 27 July 18:47:07 UTC 2015

Coworker on phone: If you want to know any good 12-year-olds, I can tell you. Just ask.Rancho Cordova, CaliforniaOverheard by: Over H. Eard [Link]

Mental Floss » How Do Anthills Survive the Rain?

Monday 27 July 18:39:39 UTC 2015

The ant fortresses you find on your lawn have a number of defenses. [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Mick Jagger

Monday 27 July 18:39:37 UTC 2015

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Russia to boost their Arctic naval presence in order to protect their access to strategic penguin reserves [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 18:36:28 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Discontinued Products From Coca-Cola and Pepsi

Monday 27 July 18:30:00 UTC 2015

Remember when OK Soda was a thing? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I have no idea what you're talking about, so here are some Vietnamese people fending off the crippling summer sun with ingenious contraptions [Weird]

Monday 27 July 18:21:09 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Forecasters predict a sighting of the sun in Sweden. Apparently this is rare enough to be news there [Cool]

Monday 27 July 18:10:07 UTC 2015

Cool [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Musical Preferences Can Predict How Empathetic You Are

Monday 27 July 18:00:00 UTC 2015

More empathetic individuals are more likely to enjoy soft rock, a new study finds. [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 27 July 17:53:06 UTC 2015

Today, I found out my pregnant sister has been watching Teen Mom 2 to find out how to be a good parent. FML [Link]

FMyLife » NoOrdinaryNZer says FML

Monday 27 July 17:53:05 UTC 2015

Today, I got the last clean bowl out of the cupboard for a bowl of cereal. After I had finished, my family asked me if I had cleaned it first. It turns out that that specific bowl is apparently the dog's, and everyone just puts it back after feeding him. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Assemblyman introduces drone legislation based upon fake YouTube video from viral marketing campaign [Dumbass]

Monday 27 July 17:43:06 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [44 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » dole_dosser says FML

Monday 27 July 17:35:16 UTC 2015

Today, I decided to start jogging to keep fit. I was passed about ten times by the same car, carrying four bozos whose vocabulary consisted only of, "TITTIES!" and copious amounts of giggling. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Works of Art Recreated in Oreo Filling

Monday 27 July 17:30:00 UTC 2015

Artist Tisha Cherry is known for her amazing food art, but what's possibly most impressive are her tiny renditions of famous paintings. You can see works by everyone from Frida Kahlo to René Magritte carved into colored Oreo cream. If fine art isn't your thing, Cherry has also immortalized movies, pop cultures icons, and Mr. Monopoly. What's most interesting is … [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Honest Wedding Website Admits There Jack Shit For Guests To Do While In Town

Monday 27 July 17:26:00 UTC 2015

LAURENS, IA—Acknowledging the lack of any remotely interesting or entertaining attractions in the surrounding area, the wedding website for couple Adam Jessup and Rachel McHenry explicitly states that there is absolutely jack shit for guests to do while they’re in town, sources confirmed Monday. “There’s a Pizza Hut, a gas station, and that’s about it,” reads the website in part, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark NotNewsletter: Today we celebrate the anniversary of a momentous event [FarkBlog]

Monday 27 July 17:19:52 UTC 2015

FarkBlog [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hot shot bot to spot whale snot [Spiffy]

Monday 27 July 17:16:21 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The London Underground's worst serial killer probably shoved eighteen people to their deaths. Surely that makes him the best London Underground serial killer [Scary]

Monday 27 July 17:06:00 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » New Korean Flip Phone Runs on Android's Lollipop OS

Monday 27 July 17:00:00 UTC 2015

Don't call it a comeback—not yet, anyway. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And the gun? Well, the donut trade can be rough [Unlikely]

Monday 27 July 16:51:49 UTC 2015

Unlikely [link] [38 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » anon says FML

Monday 27 July 16:43:51 UTC 2015

Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML [Link]

The Onion » News in Photos: World’s 22,000 Polar Bears Forced To Share Last Remaining Iceberg

Monday 27 July 16:37:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Fark.com RSS » You've got male, Ozturk and Cakmak at Apopka, and Star Wars Episode VIII – Revenge of the Unintelligible: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 7/19 – 7/25 [FarkBlog]

Monday 27 July 16:32:14 UTC 2015

FarkBlog [link] [2 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the One-Syllable Words That Rhyme With 'Mind'

Monday 27 July 16:30:00 UTC 2015

Take the quiz! [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Mighty Facts About Great Danes

Monday 27 July 16:30:00 UTC 2015

Great Danes are known for casting a shadow over most other dogs—and small children. Learn more about what makes this colossal canine tick. [Link]

Mental Floss » Tarrare, the Greatest Glutton of All Time

Monday 27 July 16:00:00 UTC 2015

Today's competitive eaters are renowned for consuming dozens of hot dogs in a single sitting, but the unusual eaters of old performed much weirder feats. Medieval reports describe people consuming hearty helpings of stones, spiders, and snakes, among other poisonous things, and showmen were making a living touring Europe on the strength of their strange stomachs by the early 17th … [Link]

FMyLife » BandAid1865 says FML

Monday 27 July 15:51:31 UTC 2015

Today, I found out why my girlfriend was so excited to get to see me. She finally got to end the relationship she didn't want anymore. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bovine terrorists strike again, this time derailing a train in Kent, England (w/pic of what a herd of bovine terrorists looks like) [Scary]

Monday 27 July 15:42:23 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Amsterdam's Schiphol Airport opens new ride adventure – landing a KLM 777-300ER in a 75mph crosswind [Scary]

Monday 27 July 15:34:41 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Meet Vincent Van Gogh's Brother, Vincent Van Gogh

Monday 27 July 15:30:00 UTC 2015

The elder Vincent had a profound influence on his artist brother—despite the fact that the two never met. [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Bing Removing Revenge Porn

Monday 27 July 15:30:00 UTC 2015

Joining a growing list of tech companies taking a stand against “revenge porn,” or the act of posting compromising images of someone online without their consent, Microsoft announced it would honor victims’ requests to remove links to such material from Bing search results. What do you think?
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » As if they didn't have enough already, thirteen more species of nope discovered in Australia [Scary]

Monday 27 July 15:01:22 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Man Who Built Suburbia

Monday 27 July 15:00:00 UTC 2015

By building 36 homes a day, William Levitt made a fortune—and reinvented American domestic life. [Link]

The Onion » Slideshow: The Week In Pictures – Week Of July 27, 2015

Monday 27 July 14:59:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Fark.com RSS » If your first date ends with having to be rescued by helicopter it means one of two things: 1) You need to pick better first dates, or 2) You'll have the best "how I met your mother" story to tell your kids [Amusing]

Monday 27 July 14:55:27 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [33 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Editorial Cartoon: The Rat In The High Hat

Monday 27 July 14:49:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Fark.com RSS » French MP wears "Obama, you're a douchebag" T-shirt in Crimea because he didn't know Russian [Dumbass]

Monday 27 July 14:42:22 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [145 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 17 Fun Facts About ‘Fraggle Rock’

Monday 27 July 14:30:00 UTC 2015

Dance your cares away. [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Study: Those Who Go To College Earn More Degrees Over Lifetime Than Those Who Do Not

Monday 27 July 14:11:00 UTC 2015

WASHINGTON—Confirming the conventional wisdom regarding the importance of college attendance in obtaining a diploma, a study published Monday by the National Education Association found that individuals who go to college earn more degrees over their lifetime than those who do not. “Our data suggests, quite convincingly, that those who pursue higher education invariably obtain more baccalaureates,” NEA researcher Denise Hallinan … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two men go for the unicorn of being charged with DUI in same car [Dumbass]

Monday 27 July 14:04:31 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Quick, get in the car, it's a lion." "But we're in Milwaukee." "Don't ask stupid questions, GET IN THE CAR" [Followup]

Monday 27 July 13:51:00 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Prison inmate wants to change his name to "Supreme Infinite Knowledge" [Dumbass]

Monday 27 July 13:47:46 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Twitter out to delete stolen jokes and recycled tweets in apparent attempt to cut down on 98.7% of their traffic [Fail]

Monday 27 July 13:39:19 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [95 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Hank Robar’s Toilet Art

Monday 27 July 13:19:15 UTC 2015

Back in 2004, Hank Robar wanted to get a property he owned in Potsdam, NY rezoned so that he could open a donut store there. His application was rejected, and in response Robar created a "toilet garden" — which consisted of rows of old toilets with poles behind them. The toilets had flowers in them. The 'toilet garden' was apparently allowed … [Link]

FMyLife » stonehengeva says FML

Monday 27 July 13:18:31 UTC 2015

Today, the drive-thru lady at Taco Bell broke my debit card and tried to hide it by wrapping it in a receipt. FML [Link]

FMyLife » wot02 says FML

Monday 27 July 13:18:30 UTC 2015

Today, my long distance boyfriend got angry because I like touching myself while we sext. It "distracts" me from him. I'm sorry you turn me on. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police have been called after a senior British Parliamentarian was pictured snorting cocaine with two prostitutes and pleasuring himself. Authorities have confirmed he is a high wanking official [Repeat]

Monday 27 July 13:02:45 UTC 2015

Repeat [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this roaring beast [Photoshop]

Monday 27 July 13:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Who knew smoking was THIS bad for you? (with video) [Scary]

Monday 27 July 12:43:29 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Stunning photographs show where the world gets its lifeblood from. Thank you, coffee farmers [Hero]

Monday 27 July 12:30:26 UTC 2015

Hero [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Genius Acts of Awesomeness

Monday 27 July 12:30:00 UTC 2015

Making the world a better place can be tough. But as these tenaciously altruistic moves prove, sometimes all you need is a great idea. [Link]

Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 67: Composing Beyond the Grave

Monday 27 July 12:27:13 UTC 2015


In 1933, violinist Jelly d’Aranyi declared that the spirit of Robert Schumann was urging her to find a concerto that he’d written shortly before his death in 1856. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll describe the discovery of Schumann’s lost violin concerto, as well as a similar case in which a London widow claimed to receive new … [Link]

FMyLife » blondebarbie271 says FML

Monday 27 July 12:25:14 UTC 2015

Today, I had to bail my ex-husband out of jail. He didn't want his new wife to get mad at him. FML [Link]

Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #255

Monday 27 July 11:34:08 UTC 2015


image

[Click upper and/or lower half of ad to enlarge]

Who knew that fresh coffee promoted dancing?

Original ad here. [Link]

FMyLife » GreatParenting says FML

Monday 27 July 11:17:14 UTC 2015

Today, I had to go to the emergency room in the middle of the night. Even though they know I don't have any money, let alone shoes on my feet, my parents have decided it's far too much trouble to come pick me up because we're on vacation and they want to have fun. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Mick Jagger

Monday 27 July 11:15:00 UTC 2015

[Link]

Mental Floss » A Light Powered by Salt Water

Monday 27 July 10:31:33 UTC 2015

Rural communities in the Philippines will no longer have to depend on kerosene and candles to illuminate their homes at night. [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 27 July 10:31:08 UTC 2015

Today, I went to put a lasagna in the oven for dinner. I was greeted by a revolting scent of a chicken-soup and biscuits boxed dinner. The fridge apparently was too full for my brother to put it away inside, so he covered it up and forgot about it in the oven. We made that dinner two weeks ago. FML. [Link]

GraphJam » I Think of Your Mother

Monday 27 July 10:30:57 UTC 2015

climax peak Pie Chart your mom - 4784771840 Graph by: Entwistlefan101 Tagged: climax , peak , Pie Chart , your mom Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How people fix things

Monday 27 July 10:30:55 UTC 2015

duct tape fix hit Pie Chart professional super glue WD-40 yell - 3453771008 Graph by: Stolle Tagged: duct tape , fix , hit , Pie Chart , professional , super glue , WD-40 , yell Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You've Definitely Never Heard of It

Monday 27 July 10:30:50 UTC 2015

hipster,Line Graph,movies,obscure Graph by: hookembears Tagged: hipster , Line Graph , movies , obscure Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Replotted: And Men Fapping With Them

Monday 27 July 10:30:46 UTC 2015

dong fap Omegle Pie Chart replotted - 5928891648 Graph by: Tagged: dong , fap , Omegle , Pie Chart , replotted Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Monday 27 July 10:30:45 UTC 2015

freeze tag hot boys normal Pie Chart statues Graph by: Unknown Tagged: freeze tag , hot boys , normal , Pie Chart , statues Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » He's Got Lots of "Survival Liquid"

Monday 27 July 10:30:44 UTC 2015

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bear grylls , pee , Pie Chart , stranded , survival Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Entertainment value of things being smashed

Monday 27 July 10:30:43 UTC 2015

Bar Graph car collection destroy egg guitar muffin nickelback pumpkins smash - 3510029824 Graph by: gunsnake Tagged: Bar Graph , car , collection , destroy , egg , guitar , muffin , nickelback , pumpkins , smash Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » It's a Chiller Thriller Ice

Monday 27 July 10:30:42 UTC 2015

caution,ice,michael jackson,moonwalk,Pie Chart,thriller Graph by: supo32 Tagged: caution , ice , michael jackson , moonwalk , Pie Chart , thriller Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Remote Quality Control

Monday 27 July 10:30:36 UTC 2015

Graph by: Brown Tagged: channels , Line Graph , log scale , quality control , remote , superpun , television Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Is Your Fridge Running?

Monday 27 July 10:30:34 UTC 2015

Graph by: S.P.A-Bits (via Bite) Tagged: food , fridge , personality , rotting Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Probability of operating an alarm clock Rubix cube, doable with hours of concentration Qauntum physicists have yet to unravel the mysteries

Monday 27 July 10:30:30 UTC 2015

Cheezburger Image 3670012160 Probability of operating an alarm clock Graph by: kmhlucky13 Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why I love having my own office

Monday 27 July 10:30:29 UTC 2015

Graph by: BirchSaws Tagged: co-workers , desk , eat , fart , internet , Music , Office , online Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » They Hate Us!

Monday 27 July 10:30:28 UTC 2015

Bar Graph hate whatdoestheinternetthink Graph by: Hani.os Tagged: Bar Graph , hate , whatdoestheinternetthink Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Proof That Women Are Evil!

Monday 27 July 10:30:21 UTC 2015

Why Women are evil! Women Time Money Everbody knows that: Time Money Women Money Money Money 2 ( ) We know that money is the root of all evil: Money Evil Women Evil ( ) 2 Women Evil Graph by: Marushin Tagged: best of week , equation , evil , math , money , time , women Share on Facebook [Link]

FMyLife » sarah4241 says FML

Monday 27 July 10:04:50 UTC 2015

Today, I was making some scrambled eggs. I had the eggs in a pan, stirring for about ten minutes, before I realised that the eggs were cooking very slow. I tried to figure out what was wrong for another few minutes before my grandma pointed out to me that the oven wasn't turned on. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: From Short to Feature Film

Monday 27 July 10:00:18 UTC 2015

Cool links to get your week started right! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And then there was that time we helped nuke a Japanese city and then two thirds of us got eaten by sharks. I'm not saying it was a good time [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 9:01:07 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [108 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Old and busted: Responding to "black lives matter" with "all lives matter." New hotness: Responding to "black lives matter" with pepper spray [Asinine]

Monday 27 July 8:11:30 UTC 2015

Asinine [link] [258 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » An Interactive Guide to Literary Road Trips Across America

Monday 27 July 8:00:00 UTC 2015

Check out a map that tracks 12 classic America books featuring road trips across the country. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "I didn't realize his arm was cut off until probably a minute or two into the conversation" [Followup]

Monday 27 July 7:52:30 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you think that all cultures embrace the idea of two people pressing their lips together, you can kiss that idea goodbye [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 7:40:00 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [52 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » rissa5214 says FML

Monday 27 July 7:20:39 UTC 2015

Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » The Subtle Genius of Minionese

Monday 27 July 7:09:30 UTC 2015

Because the 2010 film Despicable Me was about an evil genius, it was only natural that it should also feature minions. From Dr. Frankenstein’s Igor to Dr. Evil’s Mini-Me, underlings who are prepared to fawn over evil geniuses and do their every bidding are a staple of the genre. A minion is by definition a particular type of subordinate henchman. … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Members of British parliament view porn on their work computers 20,000 times a month. As a whole, not individually; that would be impossible [Giggity]

Monday 27 July 6:08:00 UTC 2015

Giggity [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The New York Times article on the treatment of Asian nail salon workers in New York was written to the same Journalistic standards as a Rolling Stone Magazine rape article [Facepalm]

Monday 27 July 5:48:25 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Rare and Expensive Types of VHS Tapes

Monday 27 July 5:42:55 UTC 2015

Collectors of any kind know that scarcity is king, but that the loving eye of the beholder can also account for a lot; for example, a slice of Prince William and Kate Middleton’s wedding cake recently sold for almost $3000, even though it was presumably pretty stale. The same is true of VHS, a medium which, having only finally been … [Link]

Mental Floss » The One Disney Song That's Copyright Free

Monday 27 July 5:42:44 UTC 2015

Arguably Disney's most-performed song earns the company not a single penny. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » GPS tells bus driver that his 3.6 meter tall vehicle can fit under a 2.6 meter bridge [Fail]

Monday 27 July 5:18:00 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [70 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » lextoast says FML

Monday 27 July 4:55:41 UTC 2015

Today, I went on a fabulous date with a really cute, smart, funny guy. He only mentioned his dad, so when I asked about his mom, I asked if they were divorced. She'd died of breast cancer so I felt awful. Then I asked if his dad had ever remarried. His stepmom had died of cancer too. FML [Link]

FMyLife » suosi says FML

Monday 27 July 4:55:40 UTC 2015

Today, the crush I've had for months finally came over to my place for the first time. It didn't last long however, as I suddenly had to go to the ER for severe testicular pain. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Search for the bodies of 43 missing students has been a case of good news/bad news. Bad news: They haven't found any of the missing students yet. Good news: They've found at least 129 other missing people, in 60 unmarked graves [Scary]

Monday 27 July 4:55:00 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man calls out Starbucks customers he thinks are wrongly using the handicapped space. Starbucks responds by banning him from all stores for life [Florida]

Monday 27 July 4:39:00 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [180 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » We all woke up this morning never expecting to read a sentence that contained the words "artificial-semen suppositories," and yet here we are [Weird]

Monday 27 July 3:40:11 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Have you researched your family history? Find any interesting or embarrassing ancestors? Tell us about them [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 1:12:19 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [489 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Like mother, like daughter [News]

Monday 27 July 1:08:29 UTC 2015

News [link] [206 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sex worker kills possible serial killer which puts her ahead of the FBI for serial killers stopped this year [Interesting]

Monday 27 July 0:33:27 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » John and Abigail Adams: America's First Power Couple

Monday 27 July 0:24:49 UTC 2015

The Adamses set the tone for generations of American political celebrity pairs to come. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this method of payment [Photoshop]

Monday 27 July 0:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

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