Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
Overheard In The Office » It's Renée Zellweger.
Secretary: This looks like a tiny dead bird.Director: But it's not one, that's the important part.University of Maine
Orono, Maine [Link]
Mental Floss » 7 of the World’s Most Famous Trees
Martin Bodman, Wikimedia Commons // CC BY-SA 2.0 With their imposing size and symbolic weight, trees are already the plant world’s celebrities. But some trees can boast special A-list status, whether for their massive measurements, the number of years they’ve got under their belt (and inside their trunks), or their place in history. Below, some trees worth rolling out the … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Rick Santorum said Bruce Jenner IS a human being, not that he deserves to be treated like one. Big difference [Followup]
[link] [114 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » What Seaweed Farms Look Like From Space
If you want to know where your seaweed salad comes from, NASA's satellite imagery can help. [Link]
Mental Floss » These Monkeys Wield Makeshift Hammers And Anvils
Humans aren’t the only animals that know how to wield a tool. Bearded capuchin monkeys, a species that lives in Central and South America, use stones to crack tucum nuts against logs and rocky outcroppings that act as natural anvils. The surprisingly dexterous primates can even adjust their tool use on the fly based on the way the nut is … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nine workers sent to hospital, with one in critical condition, after accident at Los Alamos Neutron Science Center. No word yet on charges [Scary]
[link] [98 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Millionaires worry they are one stock market crash away from not being able to afford another miniature giraffe [Interesting]
[link] [87 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » How to Put On a 200 Pound Turban
If you think your morning beauty routine is time consuming, check out what Baba Avtar Singh has to do. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Dallas cartoon attacker named. Apparently, it was neither Snidely Whiplash nor Yosemite Sam [Followup]
[link] [220 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » One down, two to go. Rubella has been eliminated from the Western Hemisphere [Hero]
[link] [72 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » to_complicated_4_u says FML
Today, I got screamed at to the point of tears by a Starbucks employee for "giving an obviously fake name" to confuse one of the employees. I told her my real name. My name is Ian. FML [Link]
FMyLife » _Domster_46 says FML
Today, my little sister came up to me holding up my phone. It wouldn't be so bad if she hadn't dropped it in the toilet first. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Guinness Book record for the world's largest facial busted in China [Strange]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Things We Learned About Big Bird from 'Bullseye'
#3: A cameraman saved him from being burned to death during taping. [Link]
Mental Floss » 16 Illuminating Facts About 'Sixteen Candles'
John Hughes' original teen movie is almost twice as old as its protagonist. [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Colorful Facts About the Red-Eyed Tree Frog
Agalychnis callidryas, better known as the red-eyed tree frog, is one charming amphibian. With bright red eyes, colorful sides, and an extremely expressive face, it’s hard not to be captivated by this wonderful frog. But no animal should be defined by good looks alone—so we talked to Don Boyer, Curator of Herpetology at the Bronx Zoo, to find out more. … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these inner workings [Photoshop]
[link] [37 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Making Chipotle Guacamole
Stop the presses. Chipotle has released their actual guacamole recipe. * It’s warm out, so it’s time to start hitting up some amusement parks. If you're sick of Six Flags, Thrillist has some alternatives. People in Ohio, Virginia, Pennsylvania, and California sure know how to have fun. * Science Explains: Strange behaviors like not replacing the toilet paper or laughing … [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Mayweather-Pacquiao Fight Derided As Boring
Saturday’s welterweight title fight between boxers Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Manny Pacquiao, which had been hyped as the “Fight of the Century,” was widely criticized as boring and a waste of time by many viewers who paid $100 to watch it on TV. What do you think? 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » As a reward to Baltimore residents for ending the violence, police shoot another black man – Update: Fox has changed their article with the phrase "conflicting reports" [NewsFlash]
[link] [486 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Inside the Toxic Explosion Shooting Out of a Beetle’s Butt
Bombardier beetles share their name with Air Force crews who drop bombs for a reason. When under attack, the beetles, native to much of the world, expel a noxious jet of scalding chemicals at their enemies.
As part of a study published in Science magazine, intrepid researchers at MIT, the University of Arizona, and Brookhaven National Laboratory in New York … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You know all those glass-half-full people? They can suck it: Science [Interesting]
[link] [85 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: Who Is Ben Carson?
Retired neurosurgeon and rising conservative star Ben Carson announced his bid for the presidency Monday, the first African-American candidate of either major political party to do so. Here’s what you need to know about the Republican candidate: 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Russian provocations in Transcarpathia worries locals, who still remember what happened the time a different guy named Vlad got angry [Scary]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Name the Star Wars Characters With the Most Lines
[Link]
Mental Floss » 9 Ways 'The Art of War' Conquered the World
Image credit: A bamboo copy of The Art of War, housed at the University of California, Riverside, via Wikimedia Commons // CC BY 2.0 Sun Tzu’s The Art of War is perhaps the most influential treatise on leadership and war ever written. Everyone from New England Patriots’ coach Bill Belichick to Tupac Shakur has supposedly read the 2500-year-old text’s 13 … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 'Edutainment failed me.' Or, how learning to die of dysentery doesn't teach you how to get to Oregon [Misc]
[link] [66 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: Who Is Carly Fiorina?
Carly Fiorina, a former Silicon Valley executive, announced Monday her candidacy for the 2016 presidential election, becoming the first female Republican hopeful to officially launch a campaign. Here’s what you should know about Fiorina: 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Millions infected, tens of millions will die, everybody panic [Sick]
[link] [101 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fark NotNewsletter: May the fourth be whiff you [FarkBlog]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Punching two guards on your way out of jail is no way to get out of jail [Dumbass]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » This Shirt Comes Pre-Stained To Hide Your Spills
Accident-prone fashionistas, go ahead and accept errant mustard stains as part of your personal look. With Dirt Pattern Material, a shirt from Stockholm-based designers Mair/Wennel, the cotton button-down comes pre-stained to camouflage your worst oops moments. Red wine, bike chain grease, grass stains, and other evidence of an active life come baked into the pattern. So if you add a … [Link]
The Onion » News in Brief: Fetus Going To Pretend He Doesn’t Hear Loud Argument Coming From Other Side Of Uterine Wall
WICHITA, KS—Searching for something to take his attention off the uncomfortable domestic dispute occurring just a few feet away, a local 6-month-old fetus reportedly decided Monday to pretend he couldn’t hear the loud argument coming from the other side of the uterine wall. 
[Link]
FMyLife » FMe says FML
Today, I got yelled at for 'letting' my muddy dog jump on my cousin's wedding dress as she was getting ready. I don't own a dog and haven't since I was a kid. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Canada too flirted with prohibition in the 20's – in such a half-assed way that most folks were too drunk to notice (except for the odd shoot-out between cops & bootleggers) [Interesting]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Berkshire Hathaway Products Featuring Warren Buffett's Face
If you didn't make it to "Woodstock for Capitalists," here are the souvenirs you missed out on. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Men's beards "found to contain more human poop than a toilet" [Scary]
[link] [324 comments] [Link]
The Onion » News in Brief: Obama Lays Out Plan To Achieve Lasting Peace Talks In Middle East
WASHINGTON—Expressing his belief that a new future for the troubled region was within reach, President Obama unveiled his strategy Monday for attaining lasting peace talks in the Middle East. 
[Link]
The Onion » News in Brief: Guy Who Died Playing ‘League Of Legends’ In Internet Café Really Starting To Ruin Game For Other Patrons
SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA—Admitting he was having difficulty concentrating on destroying his enemy’s nexus as he sat inside PC Zone internet café Monday, League Of Legends: Dominion player JuHo Lee complained that the guy who died at the adjacent computer station was really starting to ruin the game for him. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » People are literally dying to get a funny obituary published [Silly]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » How Pay-Per-View Television Worked in 1951
Eugene McDonald enjoyed taking risks. He was an avid outboard motor racer who was fond of arduous polar expeditions and showing off his collection of gangster-used firearms. In the late 1940s, what he was proposing to do may have been the most radical idea of them all: getting people to pay for television, one program at a time. McDonald was … [Link]
Mental Floss » Which Historical Figure Was Born First?
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Study: Funny Men Better In Bed
According to a new study, funny men are more likely to give women orgasms and have partners who want to have sex more often. What do you think? 
[Link]
FMyLife » double trouble says FML
Today, I found my bike that was stolen a week ago in front of someone's house. Now this wouldn't have been a problem if my husband didn't steal it to go meet with his girlfriend. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Chinese man who collapsed after 14-day web binge begs paramedics to turn on his computer: "Leave me alone and turn on the computer for me. I want to surf the internet" [Dumbass]
[link] [54 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Editorial Cartoon: They’ve Got A Beef
[Link]
The Onion » Slideshow: The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 4, 2015
[Link]
Weird Universe » News of the Weird / Plus, May 4, 2015
News of the Weird / Plus
May 4, 2015 (Part 1 of 2) [weird stuff that made me excited (frightened) (ROTFL) (appalled) last week, some of which will appear in News of the Weird soon] [Part 1 on Monday, Part 2 on Tuesday]
There’s an Iditarod Fantasy League (It’s on the mushers, not the dogs!) Alaska Dispatch News
There’s now … [Link]
Mental Floss » 12 Tangy Facts about Yogurt
You know it’s creamy and delicious. But how well do you really know the yogurt on your spoon? [Link]
Mental Floss » Who is the Mailer-Daemon?
If you've ever mistyped an email address, you have surely been paid a visit by the Mailer-Daemon (in the form of a reply email). Who is this terrifying ghoul and why did it journey from the fiery depths of hell through your computer to remind you of your mistake? Simply put, a daemon is a computer program that automatically performs … [Link]
Overheard In The Office » After That, I Wore It all the Time, So It Wasn’t Really a Costume
Male peon: I was a pink My Little Pony for Halloween once.312 Plum Street
Cincinnati, Ohio [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Not All on the Same Day, As Her Suit Alleges
Boss: It’s not like I was banging her in the supply closet.Bigger boss: But you did bang her in the supply closet and in your office… And, for that matter, my fucking office, you asshole.Boss: Yeah, but those were different occasions.Alpharetta, Georgia [Link]
Overheard In The Office » The Boss-Lady’s Mistake Was Referring to Workers as “Peons”
Coworker #1, at nine AM: Is it time to go home yet?Coworker #2: Not quite! Why, not feeling well?Coworker #1: Was at a friend’s house last night — mixed rum and wine. It’s gonna be a long day… Think the boss lady will let us go home early?Coworker #2: Don’t think so. Just drink a glass of water; you’ll be fine.Coworker … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Surfing the roof of a stranger's car while riding down the highway tweaking out on meth is no way to go through life, son [Florida]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "The two-hour autism segment was squeezed in before a refresher on Tasers" [Unlikely]
[link] [128 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Lynyrd Skynyrd rycyrdyng nyw albym, the world's first video game for cats, and Konami gets fans' hopes up up, down down: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/26 – 5/2 [FarkBlog]
[link] [0 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this extra-sandy beach [Photoshop]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Noise Complaint
The joy of neighbors! Police gave 91-year-old Yvette Vachon of Quebec a ticket for $148 after her neighbors downstairs complained she was making too much noise. Apparently her la-z-boy style rocking chair was too loud.
However, after reviewing the complaint (and possibly swayed by all the media attention the case was getting in Canada) the city cancelled the fine. [National Post] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Carly Fiorina promises to do for the US what she did for HP. And Lucent. And AT&T [Hero]
[link] [0 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Might As Well Shave Your Head While You’re at It
Female coworker, as another is delivered flowers: Every time I see the flower delivery guy I hope it’s for me. I wish someone would send me something nice like that. Oh, well. I’ll just take a piece of chocolate from the candy dish.Male coworker: That’s right, decrease your chances even further.Route 110
Long Island, New YorkOverheard by: Drone [Link]
Weird Universe » Femineered!
Now this is how you encourage young girls to study engineering: by showing them refrigerators! I think it's time we brought back this neologism. "The Army Corps of Femineers!" Can you imagine the uniforms? Who wouldn't want to belong? [Link]
Mental Floss » "Tex" in the End
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bodybuilder injected oil and alcohol into his biceps to become a real life version of The Incredible Hulk. If he was going to be that stupid, he may as well have just exposed himself to Gamma rays [Dumbass]
[link] [103 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » I pick em' good says FML
Today, I found out why my husband has been coming home from work so late. Turns out he loves to help people. Specifically female people. And by help, I mean sleep with. FML [Link]
FMyLife » umyuck says FML
Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML [Link]
GraphJam »
Graph by: krisnickell451 Tagged: csi , david caruso , Deal With It , Pie Chart , sunglasses Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Pay and Get Played
Graph by: Epicluce Tagged: buying , movies , paying , Pirate Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » THAT'S NOT TRUE
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: commercials , couch , dancing , menstruation , Pie Chart , reality , whining Share on Facebook
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GraphJam »
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Line Graph , Photo , say cheese , school , washed out , yearbook Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Now if Only I Could Fly to Work
Graph by: Scott (via HowStuffWorks) Tagged: airports , infographic , planes , safety , transportation , Travel Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » I Must Strive to Become a Chuck
Submitted by: tekrat Tagged: chuck norris , How People View Me , science Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Delivery Areas of Nearby Pizza Places
Graph by: Mandie… Tagged: close , delivery , house , near , pizza , proximity , venn diagram Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » How happy my dog is to see me
Graph by: dEbBiE-o Tagged: all , Bar Graph , day , dinner , mail , Movie , seconds , work Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Take Us, Robot Overlords
Graph by: May (via singularityhub.com) Tagged: infographic , interesting , labor , robots Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » If Any Comes Out at All
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: fountain , mouth , nose , Pie Chart , pressure , shirt , water Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam »
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Pie Chart , poke it with a stick Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » U.S. State Names Kids Misspell
Graph by: Pom-Pom Tagged: Bar Graph , easy , hard , kids , misspellings , spelling , states Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Hold On, I Can Open This Without Breaking My Pinky
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: door , groceries , Pie Chart , pull , push Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Insert Laugh Track Here
Graph by: StarsHallelujah Tagged: BFFs , friends , Laugh Track , real life , sitcoms , TV , venn diagram Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Reasons to refill my windshield washer fluid
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cars , fluid , Pie Chart , quit , reminder , windshield , wiper Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Is Your Name Ricki Roll?
Graph by: K-Dawg87 Tagged: calling , girl , numbers , phone , Pie Chart , rickroll , verification Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » News Coverage This Week
Graph by: TheQuestion Tagged: crash , Death , economy , iran , michael jackson , news , recalls , Subway , swine flu , trains Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » What I Can Do
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Bar Graph , believe , butter , directions , laces , remember , shoes , tie , time , wake up Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Better Out Than In
Graph by: IsTHISoneTakenTOo Tagged: embarrassing , facts , fart , gas , infographic , Pie Chart Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » They're Not Asleep Anymore
Graph by: (via Ryan Selvy) Tagged: asleep , audio , movies , volume Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Coffee Awesomeness
Coffee Awesomeness Graph by: DarylM Tagged: coffee , cold , delicious , drinks , gross , hot , tastes , temperature Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Notches Not Working?
Graph by: (via omnomnominator.tumblr.com) Tagged: belt , hat , lost , notch , watch Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Typecast to Death
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , dead , Game of Thrones , movies , Pie Chart , sean bean Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » Types of Commercially Available Toilet Paper
LoL by: jkdamighty Tagged: clog , comfortable , device , Fluffy , medieval , soft , toilet paper , torture Share on Facebook
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GraphJam » DIRTY CHEATERS
ALL OF YOU Graph by: boyzoid Tagged: call of duty , losing , Pie Chart , video games Share on Facebook
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GraphJam »
Graph by: k3v1n112 Tagged: available , computers , ignore , Pie Chart , reminder , update , windows Share on Facebook
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Mental Floss » Scientists Created "Ghosts" in the Lab
Have you ever experienced the creepy sensation that you’re not the only person in the room? You get a chill, maybe the hair on the back of your neck stands up, and for a second you think maybe you do believe in ghosts. This sensation is commonly reported in people with certain neurological or psychiatric disorders, or those exposed to … [Link]
Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 56: Lateral Thinking Puzzles
Here are six new lateral thinking puzzles to test your wits! Solve along with us as we explore some strange scenarios using only yes-or-no questions. Many were submitted by listeners, and most are based on real events. A few associated links — these spoil the puzzles, so don’t click until you’ve listened to the episode: Puzzle #1 Puzzle #3 Puzzle … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » People are stunned to discover that unused gift cards to stores that no longer exist suddenly have no value. "This Radio Shack thing really hit me" [Sad]
[link] [125 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fake newspaper makes real money [Ironic]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Reporter suggests royal baby will cheer everyone up after 'doom and gloom' of Nepal earthquake …. because one entitled princess trumps 6,000 peasant deaths [Dumbass]
[link] [83 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » This man has a rare form of synaesthesia. A disorder that causes him to taste words. His unique story to the left, you spewing up the most vile glossary to the right. Mmm purple [Interesting]
[link] [41 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Entire lake in India is basically 100% pee [Sick]
[link] [199 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » You Can Help Fund the World's First Cat Cinema
With cat cafes popping up to great fanfare in cities around the world, it's time for a new frontier in commercial cat-access. Enter the cat cinema. The idea is simple: in addition to furry felines and a hot beverage, the proposed Great Kitten will treat patrons to a feature film. The urban retreat—to be based in London—will be "staffed" by … [Link]
Mental Floss » Charles Darwin, Glutton
Charles Darwin: Naturalist, geologist, visionary … glutton? Though most of us know Darwin for his theory of evolution and travels on the HMS Beagle, a select group of friends from his days at Cambridge knew him mainly as a member of the Glutton Club. The culinary crew met on a weekly basis to eat “birds and beasts, which were before … [Link]
Mental Floss » 37 'Star Wars' Facts for Star Wars Day
May the Force (and the 4th) be with you! In honor of everyone’s favorite space epic set in a galaxy far, far away, here are some fun facts about the 'Star Wars' Saga. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In this building, every ground-floor apartment is a penthouse [Unlikely]
[link] [51 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Why They Stopped Hiring Ballerinas
Workbee on cell: Woah, she clogged that toilet? That’s a new toilet! What’d she do, take a gorilla shit or something?!New York City, New YorkOverheard by: Eileen [Link]
Overheard In The Office » I've Really Watched His, Uh, Practice Grow.
Patient on phone: I would like to make an appointment to see Dr. Radcliff*CSR: Okay, have you seen Dr. Radcliff before or are you a new patient?Patient: Well, he's been in me three times before (referring to stent placed in heart and legs) So he's pretty much my doctor already!CSR: Okkkkkk… (nervous chuckle)Burlington, VermontOverheard by: TMI [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Danny Here Takes Care of Exasturbating the Boss
Ditzy intern: I know you’re busy so I’m not going to exasturbate things…
Suit: Oh, not at all… In fact, better that you exasturbate me than the boss. 1901 Main Street
Columbia, South Carolina [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Your Editors Just Learned Something New!
Coworker on phone: Now, there's some guys that can really pitch washers. Don't shit yourself.Point Comfort, TexasOverheard by: Did I really just hear that? [Link]
Overheard In The Office » …If I Imagine They’re All About to Blow Up
20-something receptionist, commenting on cutesy photo of boy and dog praying: You know, I don’t really like kids, animals or god, but that photo’s okay.Mill Valley, California [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 11AM Get Mail
Mailroom worker: I know she in there ’cause I can smell her. Sweet and savory. 10 East 53rd Street
New York, NY Overheard by: Pookiepie [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Texas event promising to award $10k for the best cartoon of the Prophet Mohammed has ended in the way organizers presumably wanted [Obvious]
[link] [1237 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » It's My Prerogative
Sales manager: Did you hear Whitney died?Director: Who?Sales manager: Whitney Houston.Director: Oh, I don't care, she's a cracked out whore.Sales manager: She wasn't always a cracked out whore.Director: I'm a what-have-you-done-for-me-lately kind of guy.Fort Mill, South Carolina [Link]
Mental Floss » Pick the NBA Players Who Won at Least Two MVPs
Steph Curry just won his first MVP. Can you name everyone who won more than one? [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this fine art [Photoshop]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
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