Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » fark says FML
Today, I slipped on a wet floor at the supermarket and busted my nose. It wouldn't be as embarrassing if I hadn't missed the "CAUTION: WET FLOOR" sign that I'd put there myself just 30 minutes earlier. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my boss said he's worried about our network, because "Wifi's all in the air. People could spy on us from anywhere!" I sarcastically said "My god, you're right!" and suggested switching to tin-foil ethernet cables to stop the signal escaping. He told me to do it ASAP. This moron makes five times my salary. FML [Link]
FMyLife » fuck fof and die dad says FML
Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Walmart finally agrees to help employees cover expenses during the holidays – by holding a canned food drive for "needy associates" [Asinine]
[link] [228 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: The Most Stolen Car In Each State
Find out the most stolen car in your state. Then consider buying one of those annoying alarms. * E.T. is making us grownups look bad. Ban him! Cracked runs through some movies that got banned for really silly reasons. * If your life’s grand goal is to have your DNA buried on the moon, then you’re in luck. * Don’t … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Having friends or family over and like to put together snacks or appetizers? Share recipes for tasty little morsels, dips, and other goodies. Your Farkers will thank you [Interesting]
[link] [133 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photos of toilets around the world show that in some places, sanitation is pretty crappy [Misc]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Remember, kids: Always do your assigned reading. Your life may depend on it [Followup]
[link] [79 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » U.S. Navy ship runs across Amelia Earhart in the Gulf of Aden [Interesting]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » I am this dog. This dog is me [Amusing]
[link] [80 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pit bull parade planned in Rhode Island to celebrate end of the ban on the dog breed. What could possibly go wrong? [Stupid]
[link] [143 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When 90 pounds of marijuana positively has to be there overnight, you may first want to verify the delivery address [Fail]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "This is a drill. Repeat, this is only a drill' is the kind of thing you probably want to say when having a school shooting drill [Dumbass]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: NBC, Netflix Cancel Bill Cosby’s Return To TV Amid Rape Allegations
After decades-old allegations resurfaced and more women came forward this week with new accusations that comedian Bill Cosby had drugged and sexually assaulted them, NBC and Netflix announced they were canceling in-development projects with the 77-year-ol… 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » NSA Director warns that China can Shut. Down. Everything [Scary]
[link] [70 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this un-regular checkup [Photoshop]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Doctors Reveal Derrick Rose Injuries Leading To Incredible New Advancements In Orthopedic Surgery
CHICAGO—Saying that the 26-year-old’s body has necessitated cutting-edge medical treatment never before thought possible, leading doctors confirmed Thursday that Derrick Rose’s persistent injuries have led to groundbreaking advancements … 
[Link]
Mental Floss » Got a Business Idea that Will Change the World?
Brought to you by Chivas [Link]
Mental Floss » The Sound Design of "Interstellar"
When I saw Interstellar last weekend at an IMAX theater, I thought the sound system was mis-calibrated. The subwoofers were so strong that my seat vibrated for minutes on end, sections of dialogue were inaudible, and at times the raging sound was so loud I had to plug my ears. It was a sonic assault. Having said that, it was … [Link]
Mental Floss » Can You Ice Cream Thanksgiving?
Turkey flavored ice cream is pretty tasty. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you look at porn on a computer in the children's section of the public library you work at and do not wish to be caught, clearly the correct course of action is to steal and destroy said computer. Or not [Dumbass]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » My life with the Thrill Kill . . . robotics engineer? [Sick]
[link] [43 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 8 Celebrity Chefs of Yesteryear
Since Julia Child created and began hosting the television cooking show The French Chef in 1963, making finer fare more accessible and feasible for the general public, it seems as if the celebrity chef has been a staple of pop culture—with interest in the culinary masters reaching peak popularity in today's Food Network age. But before Anthony Bourdain and Tom … [Link]
The Onion » Temple University Receives Anonymous Donation To Build Center For Discrediting Rape Allegations
PHILADELPHIA—Stipulating that the funds be used for “furthering the invalidation of sexual assault claims wherever they occur,” an anonymous donation received Thursday by Temple University is reportedly intended to be used to build a cen… 
[Link]
The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » Cat's Schrödinger
View [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Winnie the Pooh banned from being playground mascot, because he's a pantless hermaphrodite [Stupid]
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » We're not saying Hollywood celebrities are lazy, but their latest PSA against Ebola consists of them silently staring at the camera [Silly]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Students walk in on headmaster giving oral to math teacher – which about sums it up (Not safe for work) [Fail]
[link] [150 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Google Internet balloon crashes on farm in Roswell, South Africa [Ironic]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Edward Drinker Cope and the Story of the Paleontologist’s Wandering Skull
Edward Drinker Cope’s skull started out on his body, naturally enough. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » A wall map featuring just about every rude and silly place name in Britain was launched this week – including 136 places in the country named 'bottom' [Cool]
[link] [70 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » UN reports that nearly 1,000 people have died fighting in Eastern Ukraine since the government signed a truce with rebels. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means [Sad]
[link] [11 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Desperate GOP Spotted In South Dakota Trying To Build Keystone Pipeline Themselves
RAPID CITY, SD—Excavating hundreds of miles of trench following the defeat of a Senate bill that would have approved the project, dozens of desperate GOP congressmen were reportedly spotted in rural South Dakota Thursday trying to build the Keystone… 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » 400 pound deputy can't handle 100 pound girls fighting during a food fight, so he punches one to the ground, then calls in backup. And the highway patrol. And the fire department. And a helicopter. Yes, a helicopter [Fail]
[link] [142 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Welcome to Sacred Monkey Forest. "Aw, isn't that cute." Then it turns from cute to evil and kills them [Strange]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Do you know your A.R.S.E score? (Quiz) [Silly]
[link] [67 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Slideshow: 9 Most Popular Dog Breeds
9 Most Popular Dog Breeds 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Stupid students suspended for snorting Smarties [Strange]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML [Link]
FMyLife » LemonTree says FML
Today, I realized that I ran out of deodorant. On top of that, I was late to work so I had to run, making me all sweaty and smelly. To cover it up, I used the air-freshener in the toilet at work. Everyone recognized the "Lemon Tree" scent and now all of my colleagues think I'm a cheap bastard. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Ten Toys NOT to get your kids for Christmas this year. Bag of Glass suspiciously missing [Amusing]
[link] [147 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Denmark announces its first national dish: stegt flæsk med persillesovs og kartofler. And it's as tasty as it sounds [Spiffy]
[link] [43 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » George Orwell was wrong: Big Brother *won't* be watching you. But Little Hacker Brother certainly will [Scary]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Police decide to let a 90 year-old pastor feed the homeless in a park. This time [Florida]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Owner's Box: Your Friend’s Death Could Leave 6-8 Quality Starters For Pick Up
OSN’s fantasy guru, Perry Bigwell, reminds you that it is well within your right to ask your league commissioner to release a dead friend’s dormant roster to the waiver wire. 
[Link]
Futility Closet » Constellation
Circling the earth aboard Friendship 7 in 1962, John Glenn had an odd encounter: The strangest sight of all came with the very first ray of sunrise as I was crossing the Pacific toward the U.S. I was checking the instrument panel and when I looked back out the window I thought for a minute that I must have tumbled … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » After walking away from a $37 million NFL contract, Jason Brown buys a farm and donates his harvest to food banks [Cool]
[link] [74 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Makeshift Opinion Thrown Together From Viewpoint Currently Dominating Conversation
IOWA CITY, IA—Despite his having almost no actual knowledge or strong convictions related to the subject at hand, sources confirmed that local man Brendan Enos managed to hastily throw together a makeshift opinion from the viewpoint that was current… 
[Link]
The Onion » Statshot: Least Notorious Serial Killers
Least Notorious Serial Killers 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Falsely accused of putting glass on a Big Mac a cop had ordered? That's a $437,000 settlement [Followup]
[link] [47 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » So far, the 2016 field of presidential candidates is the biggest group of losers since the Columbus Blue Jackets held their alumni night [Stupid]
[link] [299 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » It's all fun and games 'til you get charged with aggravated assault on a law enforcement officer, fleeing and eluding, reckless driving, grand theft and more after trying to run down an officer in the Kohl's parking lot [Florida]
[link] [10 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Town where Hot Fuzz was filmed descends into lawlessness. It's like The Purge [Silly]
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » US was going to end NSA snooping program before Snowden leaked it all. Uh…huh….all those who believe that, stand on your heads [Unlikely]
[link] [89 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Obesity costs the global economy $2 trillion a year, or about as much as war and terrorism combined [Scary]
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Utah wants to bring back the firing squad. Well, it can't be any more cruel or unusual than a botched lethal injection [Interesting]
[link] [93 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Gun control in Britain is so effective that criminals are now robbing supermarkets with pieces of paper on which they have drawn handguns [Weird]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Police warn angry goat on roof 'only respects one man' [Amusing]
[link] [16 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hell-raising Spanish duchess who held more royal titles than anybody on earth dies at 88; Earl of Cloves, Sir Osis of the Liver and Sir Loin of Beef ruled out as causes of death [Sad]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman, 24, racks up 100 convictions for alcohol offences, is warned by British court after the magic 100th that "she is running out of chances" [Asinine]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » It's not just American media that pad out their news with bullshiat what-if stories. Here's a British newspaper asking if the lake-effect snow that hit New York is on its way to bury the UK [Stupid]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Real Movie Locations You Can Actually Visit
1. The Firehouse from Ghostbusters. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Dear Prudence: My wife is constantly walking around naked, and now she's teaching our children that it's okay to walk around the house naked. She doesn't understand that there is good naked and bad naked. How can I stop this?" [S
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » ISIL expands its Head-Dangling World Tour to include performances at St. Peters Square. "The crusaders' missiles will not stop our advance on Rome" [Unlikely]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Uh, you know that cemetery plot where we buried that person was reserved for someone else, right?" [Fail]
[link] [13 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In an emergency procedure, dentist removes 202 teeth from a 7-year-old girl. Yes, he was abscessive compulsive [Weird]
[link] [60 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Whole Foods moved into Detroit and lowered prices in an attempt to make residents eat healthier. Naturally, their plan backfired and was perceived by many as racist elitism [Obvious]
[link] [109 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Biden Tossed Out Of Car Passing By White House
WASHINGTON—At approximately 2 a.m. Thursday morning, White House sources confirmed that Vice President Joe Biden was forcibly pushed out the rear door of a moving 1980 Lincoln Town Car onto the curb outside 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Apparently there might be some sex in the Champagne Room [Obvious]
[link] [66 comments] [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Study: Kids Throwing Away Healthier School Lunches
A new study has found that even though more U.S. children have access to healthier school lunches, thanks in part to efforts by First Lady Michelle Obama, the average kid eats about one bite of healthy food before throwing the rest away. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » 350-lb. man arrested for trying to steal five rib eye steaks from Walmart by hiding them under his folds on the seat of his mobility scooter. If only a crying bald eagle were involved, this story would epitomize America [Fail]
[link] [58 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Guess what state is claiming the first Thanksgiving actually happened there [Florida]
[link] [45 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » What is Lake–Effect Snow?
WBEN NewRadio Facebook By Tuesday night, the National Weather Service was reporting 60 inches (that's 5 feet!) of snowfall about a mile south of Lancaster, New York. Just six miles northwest from that spot, at Buffalo Niagara International Airport, only 3.9 inches were reported. The intensity and disparity of the snow is a result of something called the lake effect. … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Residents of Minden, Nebraska are shocked, SHOCKED that someone would put up a sign reading: "Aids, Ebola, Obama, Thanks Africa" [Obvious]
[link] [133 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you shoot a 12-year-old boy in a drive-by shooting it probably wouldn't be the smartest idea to send the boy's aunt a friend request on Facebook the day after the shooting [Florida]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: A Timeline Of Upcoming Superhero Movies
Following the massive successes of the Spider-Man, Batman, Avengers, and X-Men franchises, studios Marvel and DC Entertainment have announced as many as 40 upcoming superhero movies to be released over the next six years … 
[Link]
The Onion » Area Theater Has Strict Rule Against Bringing In Outside Movies
AUSTIN, TX—Reiterating the movie theater’s longstanding policy, employees at Barton Creek Cinema confirmed Thursday that customers are strictly prohibited from bringing in their own films. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Astronomers discover that black holes all line up in a row, like spinning tops across the universe – but they don't know why [Strange]
[link] [49 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Robber stole cash from grocery store, but felt real bad about it [Florida]
[link] [10 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » As Allah is my witness, I had no idea powerful stage lights would make the sheer panels on my dress do that [Silly]
[link] [116 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this public affection [Photoshop]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Nipper, the corn-eating cat
Nipper, cat owned by Dorothy Brinn, likes to eat his corn in comfort. His mistress fixed up this skewer and Nipper uses it for about two ears a day. The cat, a corn addict since his kitten days, likes it best with butter.
Toledo Blade – July 12, 1951 [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Defending your right to privacy? Guess you want KIDS to DIE [Asinine]
[link] [133 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If men don't have to shave their upper lips in November, then women shouldn't have to shave their legs [Obvious]
[link] [172 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » How To Improve Immigrants’ English
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » In five months the United States will become the chair of the Arctic Council, an international group that looks after the Arctic Circle. I get goosebumps just thinking about it [Cool]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Shang-a-"Lang"
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Man says he's created a lotion that protects people from Ebola and it also might work against HIV, hepatitis C, enterovirus, polio, MRSA, staph infections, E. coli, salmonella and other bacteria [Unlikely]
[link] [79 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » There might be a huge blizzard going on up in Buffalo but more importantly the surfs up.. Let's hang -10 [Weird]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Shang-a-"Lang"
[Link]
Mental Floss » This Miniskirt Displays Your Tweets
Often when we think about wearable technology, we think of gadgets that we can wear—fashion is generally not in the equation. Wearable tech studio Cute Circuit wants to reverse this trend by making items that are fashion first and technology second. The company designs the fashion, creates the technology, and writes the software, designing every aspect themselves to create interactive … [Link]
Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Before the Mayflower
Why the Pilgrims Came to America. It was a move of desperation.
*
The snowstorm in Buffalo trapped people in their homes and on the roads, and seven people have died in western New York state. After more than five feet fell Tuesday, there could be a couple more feet to come today.
*
How to fold The World’s Best Paper … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 100-year-old Tennessee woman finally gets her feet wet [Spiffy]
[link] [26 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In this corner we have the U.S. government, and in the other corner is an air bag maker for cars. Who is going to win? DING DING [Interesting]
[link] [50 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my friendly neighbor asked me to check in on his apartment every few days while he's gone on vacation. You can imagine my horror when I walked in for the first time and found out he's a snake breeder. Twelve more days to go. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Uh… guys? One Eyed Willy might be real [Interesting]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Weird Looking (But Fascinating!) Frogs
These aren't your run-of-the-mill amphibians; these frogs are downright freaky. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Today's failed crowd funded campaign: The Bible translated into Emoticons [Fail]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Your obligatory HOLY CRAP Buffalo Lake Effect Snow photo compilation. I'm guessing the only reason people actually want to live there is because the city has an excellent football team [PSA]
[link] [164 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Gunman opens fire in Florida State University library, at least two shot [News]
[link] [265 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Good News: Drivers talking on the phone less. Bad News: It's because they're surfing and checking email [Dumbass]
[link] [13 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » The Peace Arch
The border between the United States and Canada blurs a bit between Blaine, Wash., and Surrey, B.C. There stands the Peace Arch, a 20-meter monument to amity between the two nations commissioned by railroad executive Sam Hill in 1921. The arch stands precisely on the border, at the center of an international park: Citizens of either nation can pass without … [Link]
Mental Floss » WWI Centennial: Revolving Door War on the Eastern Front
Lodz.fotopolska.eu The First World War was an unprecedented catastrophe that shaped our modern world. Erik Sass is covering the events of the war exactly 100 years after they happened. This is the 154th installment in the series. NEW: Would you like to be notified via email when each installment of this series is posted? Just email RSVP@mentalfloss.com. November 19, 1914: … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » How much blood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck blood? [Cool]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 62 Last Name Meanings
Where does your last name come from? [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 498: "Just a Geek". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]
[link] [22 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Some of these cars were lemons, some were total flops. Others were wildly successful and are still on the market today. But every last one is packed with sex appeal. The 50 hottest cars of the past 100 years [Interesting]
[link] [204 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About 'Scott Pilgrim vs. the World'
Supercharge your next viewing of Edgar Wright’s comics-inspired film with these 15 little-known facts. 1. Edgar Wright waited six years before agreeing to direct. The eventual executive producers of Scott Pilgrim vs. the World first approached Wright to make the film in 2004 after a screening of Wright’s first film, Shaun of the Dead, by giving him a copy of … [Link]
FMyLife » bookworm says FML
Today, my supervisor was watching a video of his son. I heard a voice in the background and asked if it was Elmo. It was his wife. FML [Link]
FMyLife » honeybunny says FML
Today, I am 11 weeks pregnant and my husband has taken great glee in the fact that his horrible gas is enough to trigger my morning sickness. We're about to go on a long 12 hour drive. FML [Link]
FMyLife » limpdick9 says FML
Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this golfing soldier [Photoshop]
[link] [17 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The Broadway Hotel in Blackpool, England, is a filthy, dirty, rotten hotel. Pass it on [Dumbass]
[link] [52 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » A surprisingly informative article about marijuana edibles and dosage, and just in time for high-stress family get-togethers. Not that we'd recommend gigglecookies, just an observation [Interesting]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Baby boy in India born with eight limbs has Hindus up in arms [Strange]
[link] [59 comments] [Link]
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