Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
Fark.com RSS » 4th Circuit: Virginia is for lovers, even same-sex lovers [Spiffy]
[link] [100 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Silly White Girl or: How I learned that I am useless at foreign aid and love staying the fark away so professionals can work [Interesting]
[link] [163 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » wyverntail says FML
Today, I almost passed out choking in front of my friends, because I was laughing too hard at my own pathetic joke while eating. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hey ladies–have you ever used a bathroom at the University of Delaware? Congratulations on your film debut [Spiffy]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hello officer, I'd like to report that I think this meth I've been smoking is laced with something. Any chance you can take a ride over and check it out? Great, see you soon [Dumbass]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The most piss-poor excuse for a drug bust I've ever heard [Asinine]
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 21 Designs for The Great Tower of London That Never Was
"Taking into consideration the enormous popularity of the Eiffel Tower and the consequent pecuniary benefits conferred on those interested in that undertaking, it is not too much to anticipate that, in the course of a short time, every important country will possess its tall Tower." So said a pamphlet released in 1890 entitled Descriptive Illustrated Catalogue of the Sixty-Eight Competitive … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Dad furious after Wal-Mart refuses to sell him beer because he was shopping with his 15-year-old daughter [Asinine]
[link] [291 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » David Koch is a big fan of dinosaurs [Obvious]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Putin won't be swimming bare chested in this Russian pond any time soon [Scary]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Guy Riding ATV Has Really Been Looking Forward To Breaking His Neck On Wooded Trail
VALLEJO, CA—Saying he’s been anticipating this moment ever since a friend severed his spine on the same route last year, local man Aaron Carr excitedly told reporters that he’s really been looking forward to renting an all-terrain vehicl… 
[Link]
The Onion » Open-Minded Man Would Be Willing To Look Past Jennifer Lawrence’s Flaws
JOLIET, IL—Saying that he would be open to giving a relationship with the Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Lawrence a shot, local man Alex Robard, 31, told reporters Monday that despite any preconceptions he might have formed about the Hollywood star,… 
[Link]
The Onion » ExxonMobil, Chevron Locked In Bidding War To Acquire Lucrative Pennsylvania Senator
HARRISBURG, PA—With both sides increasing their initial offers for the prized asset, multinational energy companies ExxonMobil and Chevron Corporation are currently locked in a fierce bidding war to obtain a lucrative Pennsylvania senator, sources c… 
[Link]
Mental Floss » The 15 Weirdest Wikipedia Pages Edited From Congressional IP Addresses
Your government at work! [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 of the Scariest Streets in the World
Five routes that put the New Jersey Turnpike to shame. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » What happens when One Direction's Zayn Malik Tweets #FreePalestine? Well, we learn that there are lots of losers out there reading One Direction's Zayn Malik's Tweets, for one thing [Stupid]
[link] [170 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Looks like someone's not getting to the gym in 26 minutes [Amusing]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this bride-to-be [Photoshop]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Onion Poll: Should We Let Immigrant Children Who Crossed The U.S. Border Stay In America?
The Onion – America's Finest News Source 
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: New York Times Endorses Legalizing Marijuana
The New York Times editorial board published the first in a planned six-part piece on Sunday calling for the legalization of recreational marijuana, arguing that outlawing the drug is just as ineffective as the government’s failed ban on alco… 
[Link]
Mental Floss » 50 Words That Sound Rude But Actually Aren't
To paraphrase Krusty the Clown, comedy isn’t dirty words—it’s words that sound dirty. [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Life Hacks That Will Make Your Life Worse
These tips from WheezyWaiter will not save you time or money or make your life easier in any way. * Tap Into the Mainframe Check out this supercut of computer hacking from 1980s flicks. * Breaking Into Your House: There’s An App For That This is scary. * Cartoon Crossover Check out five minutes from the upcoming episode where the … [Link]
Mental Floss » How Your Favorite Sneakers Got Their Names
We all know that Nike is named after the Greek goddess of victory, and the origin of "Air Jordan" is hardly obscure, but where did some other famous shoes and brands get their names? [Link]
The Onion » Assisted Care Facility Hits Grand Fucking Slam With Little Styrofoam Cups Of Sherbet
PHOENIXVILLE, PA—From residents’ prompt arrival in the dining room at 2 p.m. to the extended length of time they spent socializing in the sitting area afterward, staff members confirmed that the 4-ounce Styrofoam cups of sherbet served Sunday … 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Universities are starting to realize that having an entire department dedicating to teaching students how to analyze the feminist symbolism of Chaucerian mythology and its effect on post-Industrial deconstructionism might be kind of a waste [Obvious]
[link] [364 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Russia: Those satellite images are clearly Photoshopped. You can tell by the pixels. I should know, I've doctored photos in my time [Followup]
[link] [153 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The joy of sects, tyrannosaur gangs, and feathered little bags of shiat: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 7/20 – 7/26 [FarkBlog]
[link] [2 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Strange States: Missouri’s Hair-Raising Hair Museum
This week we’re headed to the home of Mark Twain, Harry Truman, and Jesse James—the Show-Me State, Missouri. [Link]
The Onion » T.J. Maxx Job Application Just Asks Prospective Employees How Much They Plan To Shoplift
FRAMINGHAM, MA—In a move meant to streamline the company’s hiring process, representatives from T.J. 
[Link]
FMyLife » Scotty says FML
Today, I met someone who works in radio advertising. Making conversation, I described an ad that I can't stand. He wrote it. FML [Link]
The Onion » Slideshow: The Week In Pictures – Week Of July 28, 2014
The Week In Pictures – Week Of July 28, 2014 
[Link]
The Onion » Hulk Hogan Donates Hair To Lucky Locks Of Love Recipient
Hulk Hogan Donates Hair To Lucky Locks Of Love Recipient 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pub owner loses watch, only finds it when his dog's stomach starts ringing last call [Amusing]
[link] [32 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Dozens hospitalized after exposure to Country music [Obvious]
[link] [86 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When robbing a beauty supply store and the till won't open, do you A) Take the till with you B) Leave, or C) Give up and take the hair extensions [Asinine]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Liberia closes barn doors well after the horse has bolted and then died bleeding from all its orifices [Scary]
[link] [110 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 2,000 Mini-Dominoes Toppled
Here's a big achievement with tiny blocks. [Link]
Mental Floss » 17 Fun Facts About 'Deep Blue Sea'
This so-bad-it's-good horror flick swam into theaters 15 years ago today. Here are a few things you might not have known about it. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » That "hand-bottled, small-batch" rye you like to impress your friends with? Yeah, it was produced in a giant factory distillery in Indiana [Interesting]
[link] [307 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Grandpa Looking Absolutely Precious In New Baseball Cap
A new report finds climate change skeptics could reach catastrophic levels by 2020, the nation’s gratuitously sexual couples announce plans to wait in line at Six Flags, and a local grandpa looks absolutely precious in his new baseball cap. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Weak tornado leaves short trail of minimal damage in small state [Misc]
[link] [50 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Supreme Court Issues 7-1 Decision To Find Scalia's Killer
Supreme Court Issues 7-1 Decision To Find Scalia's Killer 
[Link]
FMyLife » EliTheAdorable says FML
Today, I dyed a friend's hair dark brown. She assured me I didn't need gloves as the dye would wash off. It didn't. My shift as a server is in an hour and it looks like I've been working in a tire shop my whole life. Goodbye tips, hello angry customers not wanting me anywhere near their food. FML [Link]
FMyLife » blow away says FML
Today, my husband decided to play a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Study: Earth In Middle Of ‘Sixth Extinction’
According to a new study published in the journal Science, earth is in the middle of its sixth mass extinction of biological life, which is being caused by human beings destroying habitats, disrupting climates, and killing wildlife. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » In case you haven't noticed, and judging from this morning's commute, you have, gas has dropped nine cents in the past week and is threatening to actually start following the law of supply and demand [Spiffy]
[link] [171 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Three out of four employees working in buildings without air conditioning have called in sick at least once this summer because they couldn't face another day working in a smelly, clothed sauna [Obvious]
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Editorial Cartoon: Casualties Of Bore
Casualties Of Bore 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Apple is spying on you — but, then again, what computer technology isn't? [Scary]
[link] [122 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bull semen collector says it's a tricky and dangerous job. "We know just by reading an animal, how far we can push things" [Strange]
[link] [80 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » What's old is new again especially in the case of this 1990 Toyota Supra for sale in Canada. Only 92 kilometers and still sporting the plastic wrap on the seats [Cool]
[link] [85 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Why Do Some Elements Have Symbols That Aren’t in Their Names?
The chemical symbol for oxygen is O. Makes sense. Calcium gets repped by a Ca. Sounds good. Hydrogen? H. Cobalt? Co. Lithium? Li. With you so far. Lead? Pb. Stop the presses! [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Craps Lingo
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » A century ago today Kaiser Wilhelm II had a cunning plan [Sad]
[link] [180 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Firefighter obesity is becoming a problem in the US, especially when the jaws of life have to be used to remove firefighters who become stuck in the hole while sliding down the pole [Interesting]
[link] [98 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » With all other crimes solved in New York City, police spent the weekend collecting DNA from scene of where U.S. flags were replaced with white flags on Brooklyn Bridge. Such villainy will not stand [Followup]
[link] [135 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pentecostal Evangelist claims to have Lord's authorization to sidestep biblical commands against homosexuality [Unlikely]
[link] [74 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Avoid the Noid
During the 1980s, Domino's Pizza ran a series of ads featuring "The Noid" — an annoying creature that ruined pizzas intended for delivery. By ordering pizza from Domino's you could supposedly "Avoid the Noid."
The ads were very successful, but were abruptly cancelled in January 1989 when a man named Kenneth Lamar Noid "wielding a .357 magnum revolver stormed into … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » British police to start confiscating drivers' cell phones after all car accidents, no matter how minor, to check whether either one was on their phone when the accident happened [Stupid]
[link] [67 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » tlm84 says FML
Today, while out shopping, I could hear what sounded like two grown men talking about me, and they were being pretty gross. I turned around to scold them and it turned out being a dad and his 13-year-old son. He said he was, "teaching a son to be a man, and that my ass was grounds for discussion." FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I watched a manager and a co-worker sit underneath a table in our store all day as I got yelled at for not working hard enough. I was the only one actually working. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "I've been killing them for 57 days," said Hill. "I was saving them in a 5-gallon bucket, since then it's gone out with the trash. I was going to take it down there and show them, this is what I'm living with" (gross image
[link] [59 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Podcast: Episode 20
In 1944, fully a year before the first successful nuclear test, Astounding Science Fiction magazine published a remarkably detailed description of an atomic bomb. The story, by the otherwise undistinguished author Cleve Cartmill, sent military intelligence racing to discover the source of his information — and his motives for publishing it. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » A look at how secret societies can stay secret during the age of the internet [Interesting]
[link] [74 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » As it's summertime, what's your favorite driving song? [Survey]
[link] [180 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Vietnamese are eating less dog, but more cat: "Eating cat meat is better than eating dog as the meat is more sweet, more tender than a dog" [Interesting]
[link] [103 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this run-down facility [Photoshop]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Pie Man to the Rescue!
Pie Man to the rescue: 13-plus one-off TV superheroes. Any weird superhero can be interesting for a single appearance.
*
Eight-year-old Noah Aldrich pushed, pulled, and towed his disabled brother through a youth triathlon because they do everything together. They are the living embodiment of a Hollies song.
*
Rebecca Ehalt returned home after a two-year absence and was greeted … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Britain's extreme heatwave may kill up to 10,000 people. "Raging temperatures have continued to fuel a frenzy of betting with bookmakers" [Scary]
[link] [165 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Otto Witte, the King of Albania
Wikipedia article here. Click text below in first article to enlarge.
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Remember the magical warlock who convinced kids to have sex with him by promising to bring their dead parents back to life? Well, he got his ass kicked in prison today [Followup]
[link] [117 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » ano says FML
Today, I got fired by text because my coworkers had apparently told my boss that I was aggressive with customers. When I asked my boss directly and explained that I was always polite and friendly, she said it might have sounded that way because I have an accent. Still fired. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » Craps Lingo
[Link]
Mental Floss » Brain Game: Math Square #226
Welcome to today's mentalfloss.com Brain Game challenge, Monday Math Square #226. Good luck: Place the digits 1 through 9 in the white blanks so that the mathematical equations work both across and down. Each digit 1 through 9 should appear only once in the main grid (the red square). 
Here is the SOLUTION. [Link]
FMyLife » why says FML
Today, I listened to my best friend describe having sex with her boyfriend in explicit detail. This would have been fine, but her boyfriend is my little brother. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The reason why milk is located in the back of the grocery store? It's not as obvious as you think [Interesting]
[link] [185 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pilot who never heard of Sully Sullenberger attempts Florida beach landing [Florida]
[link] [98 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Possibly the greatest advance in water balloon technology of all time. OF ALL TIME [Cool]
[link] [69 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » In a Word
obolary
adj. poor or impecunious inopious
adj. lacking wealth or resources; needy ptochocracy
n. government by the poor [Link]
Fark.com RSS » American doctor infected with Ebola while in Africa. This is, terrifyingly enough, not a repeat [Scary]
[link] [150 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » notgoth says FML
Today, I went to a bar with my best friend, and some guys came up to us and started flirting with her and offering her a drink. I felt a bit left out and started joking that "I'm thirsty too". One guy looked at me, cringed and said, "No, I don't buy drinks for weird girls." FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » World's Worst Arsonist: Confused man sets himself on fire attempting to burn down an occupied home [Florida]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Not news: Dog chases cat. News: Dog gets his leg caught in long grass on council-owned land and slips a disc. FARK: Dog's owner sues council for £5,000 [Stupid]
[link] [63 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Father of the year candidate doesn't notice when his 3-year-old son wandered out of the house ending up 10 blocks away at 2:30 in the morning and refused to open the door to police or pick up his son from the police department [Fail]
[link] [75 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Need braaains [Stupid]
[link] [63 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Breast feeding equipment? In my vending machines? It's more likely than you think [Interesting]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » At least thirteen people shocked to learn that sometimes it really does rain in southern California [Scary]
[link] [50 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Map of Pangea With Current International Borders
Let's get the band back together. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Riders of the Skyhawk ride at Ohio's Cedar Point need a sedative and a new pair of underwear after a cable that swings patrons as high as 124 feet snaps, injuring two [Scary]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Blow-by-blow of a home invasion: "As I was dragging him out he went down and then came up and grabbed my nuts. He grabbed them really hard and it was really painful, but I had a lot of adrenalin" [Hero]
[link] [50 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Actual words in this article, in this actual order: CNN is one of the world's ranking quality news brands [Stupid]
[link] [80 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » With all the things kids have to learn today in order to be competitive in a global economy, why are schools still teaching cursive writing? [Silly]
[link] [306 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Taliban poised to retake southern province of Kandahar, an event that pretty much nullifies everything the US and the west did in Afghanistan for 13 years [Sad]
[link] [162 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 9:30 a.m. – Redneck Baby Contest. 3 p.m. – Cornhole. 10:30 p.m. – Bikini Bullride Contest. 9:30 a.m. Sunday – Church Services. Just another year at the Tilton Redneck Games [Amusing]
[link] [17 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these superstars [Photoshop]
[link] [12 comments] [Link]
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