John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » A key part of the Earth's ozone layer is failing to heal – and scientists don't know why [Scary]

Tuesday 6 February 23:50:04 UTC 2018

Scary [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mike Pence is handling all the latest White House controversy in the best way possible: By being far far away from the White House [Obvious]

Tuesday 6 February 23:35:02 UTC 2018

Obvious [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Purchaser of many bridges calls pastor "wolf in sheep's clothing" after she accepted his offer to heal her PTSD with his penis [Facepalm]

Tuesday 6 February 23:23:47 UTC 2018

Facepalm [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » San Francisco Birthday Fark Party, 2/7 at 6pm PT – come celebrate Drew's birthday [FarkParty]

Tuesday 6 February 23:01:58 UTC 2018

FarkParty [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trump's proposed immigration plan could end up extending the duration of whites as the majority race in America by five years. Hey, what's that razor called? Ox ham or something? [Obvious]

Tuesday 6 February 22:44:05 UTC 2018

Obvious [link] [135 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Florida Man + m/ = (mugshot) [Florida]

Tuesday 6 February 22:20:05 UTC 2018

Florida [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police are looking for an older man with white hair and glasses and a lot of helium balloons. A talking dog may also have been involved [Strange]

Tuesday 6 February 22:01:43 UTC 2018

Strange [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Happy Birthday wishes to Tom Brokaw, longtime anchor of media outlet NBC news who is 78 years young today [Murica]

Tuesday 6 February 21:35:03 UTC 2018

Murica [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Enraged Florida Man hit girlfriend after she made "provocative" comments about Tom Brady during Super Bowl, cops say [Florida]

Tuesday 6 February 21:20:05 UTC 2018

Florida [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not nearly as dramatic when the headline is corrected to "Mum finds bizarre way to cure daughter's cough with a potato on FACEBOOK" [Silly]

Tuesday 6 February 21:05:03 UTC 2018

Silly [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this treading of the boards [Photoshop]

Tuesday 6 February 21:00:01 UTC 2018

Photoshop [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » SpaceX prepares to launch Falcon Heavy for the first time, plans to land all 3 Falcon 9 rockets back on Earth and put payload of Musk's own Tesla Roadster in orbit around the Sun. So, just another Tuesday. Launch window updated to between 3:45 an

Tuesday 6 February 20:54:48 UTC 2018

Live [link] [1094 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Houston Fark Party on Saturday, Feb 24th, 7:30pm CT @ Neil's Bahr [FarkParty]

Tuesday 6 February 20:46:52 UTC 2018

FarkParty [link] [83 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Forget making it rain: man accused of flooding strip club [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 20:35:03 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Please note: it is never appropriate to wax a toddler [Sick]

Tuesday 6 February 20:16:44 UTC 2018

Sick [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pirates release 22, vow to use the money saved to rebuild the farm system [Cool]

Tuesday 6 February 19:50:04 UTC 2018

Cool [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A third of all pugs can't even walk right. This explains so much about the raid finder [Sad]

Tuesday 6 February 19:35:03 UTC 2018

Sad [link] [92 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark NotNewsletter: Guess who turns 19 tomorrow [FarkBlog]

Tuesday 6 February 19:27:04 UTC 2018

FarkBlog [link] [113 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canadian sub on covert mission to bolster North Korea surveillance. WELL, IT'S NOT COVERT ANYMORE, IS IT? [Hero]

Tuesday 6 February 19:20:06 UTC 2018

Hero [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Cooperation

Tuesday 6 February 18:56:02 UTC 2018

University of Minnesota percussionist Gene Koshinski’s composition “As One” has two performers (here, Koshinski and Tim Broscious) complementing each other on identical setups, splitting one complex piece into two complex halves. More about Koshinski at his website. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Tuesday morning includes: a) Canadian whiskey, b) menthol cigarettes, c) strutting around with your junk hanging out, or d) all of the above [Florida]

Tuesday 6 February 18:49:19 UTC 2018

Florida [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2018-01-28 to Sat 2018-02-03 [FarkBlog]

Tuesday 6 February 18:22:39 UTC 2018

FarkBlog [link] [2 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » How Tide Pod eating went viral. This story is long and very weird [Weird]

Tuesday 6 February 18:20:05 UTC 2018

Weird [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Several buildings in Taiwan have suffered serious damage after a M 6.4 earthquake [News]

Tuesday 6 February 18:01:09 UTC 2018

News [link] [89 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A snuggie bar crawl? Thanx for that walking nightmare [Amusing]

Tuesday 6 February 17:50:04 UTC 2018

Amusing [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » L.A. is number one… in traffic congestion, once again. Well, at least L.A. endures in a nice pleasant climate. Pretty soon there'll be self driving cars and it won't even matter [Obvious]

Tuesday 6 February 17:35:03 UTC 2018

Obvious [link] [88 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not news: another snake story from Australia. News: Kids say "best science lesson ever" when a python decides to join the class. Fark: the snake catcher lets it explore around the chairs and tables for lulz. Bonus snake stories in the sidebar

Tuesday 6 February 17:05:03 UTC 2018

Amusing [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 14th time is the charm [Interesting]

Tuesday 6 February 16:35:03 UTC 2018

Interesting [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » China continues to demonstrate its virility by launching a long, hard megadrone that flies up to 80mph and safely ejaculates passengers including Wang Dong, the deputy mayor of Guangzhou [Giggity]

Tuesday 6 February 16:20:05 UTC 2018

Giggity [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Only in Pennsylvania is where a man hunting for squirrels can put a school on lockdown [Strange]

Tuesday 6 February 16:05:03 UTC 2018

Strange [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trolley operator was posting to Reddit just prior to crash. See, this is why I only post on Faaaaaaaaarrrh [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 15:50:04 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kid would rather lift weights, have energy drinks from private fridge in his room, practice with his Zelda sword than go to school. Of course, you are reading this on Fark, so you just know it doesn't end well [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 15:35:03 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The list of rejected vanity license plates in Utah is fairly creative for Utah [Interesting]

Tuesday 6 February 15:26:52 UTC 2018

Interesting [link] [100 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "A man was arrested Monday morning for attempting to rob a Big Daddy's Pizza with a large metal pole" [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 15:05:03 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Salad Beauty Treatment

Tuesday 6 February 14:43:41 UTC 2018

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Errant tsunami warning issued for Manhattan, much of East Coast. Can't believe the Hawaii missile guy got a new job already [News]

Tuesday 6 February 14:42:16 UTC 2018

News [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Another perfect example wherein the rich want to be exempt from the rules [Awkward]

Tuesday 6 February 14:35:03 UTC 2018

Awkward [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » These days you can't even clumsily ride your horse down the street in the middle of a Mardi Gras parade without somebody filming it and sending the video to the SPCA [Obvious]

Tuesday 6 February 14:05:03 UTC 2018

Obvious [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this swan lake [Photoshop]

Tuesday 6 February 14:00:01 UTC 2018

Photoshop [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Glamorous Kazakhstan beauty beats 4,000 contestants to the final of Miss Kazakhstan. It's a man, baby [Amusing]

Tuesday 6 February 13:50:04 UTC 2018

Amusing [link] [141 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Authorities race to farm to save the cows from vicious tiger that turned out to be stuffed animal. They got suspicious when the "tiger" didn't move for 45 minutes [Facepalm]

Tuesday 6 February 13:35:03 UTC 2018

Facepalm [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That terrorist attack on a London pub was actually teenagers throwing in fireworks. Admittedly, all teenagers are terrorists in one way or another [Followup]

Tuesday 6 February 13:05:03 UTC 2018

Followup [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Name That List, #46

Tuesday 6 February 12:38:48 UTC 2018

What is this a list of? The answer is below in extended.

vagabonds discharged soldiers discharged jailbirds escaped galley slaves swindlers mountebanks lazzaroni pickpockets tricksters gamblers maquereaux [pimps] brothel keepers porters literati organ grinders ragpickers knife grinders tinkers beggars [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Norway decides in favor of wild reindeer over energy. They'll go down in history, like Columbus [Spiffy]

Tuesday 6 February 12:33:55 UTC 2018

Spiffy [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NC transportation officials hope to use drones to help transport lifesaving supplies to those in need. The tough part will be finding one capable of lifting a Saint Bernard [Cool]

Tuesday 6 February 10:37:18 UTC 2018

Cool [link] [19 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » ARE YOU NOTICING MY ELATION!

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:25 UTC 2018

capital letters elation grammar happiness Pie Chart - 5411844352 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: capital letters , elation , grammar , happiness , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What I Learn From School Projects

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:23 UTC 2018

school group projects pie graph trust - 7943077632 Graph by: Squidkid915 Tagged: school , group projects , pie graph , trust Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Britney Spears Is…

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:21 UTC 2018

britney spears innocent Music singers - 1812868352 LoL by: Orion92786 Tagged: britney spears , innocent , Music , singers Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » A Chart About Pies? I See What You Did There

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:17 UTC 2018

clever Bar Graph food pies - 7875675904 Graph by: D_kountz1 Tagged: clever , Bar Graph , food , pies Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Chances people are listening in on your conversation

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:13 UTC 2018

chance conversation people secret - 1762322688 LoL by: 723rewound Tagged: chance , conversation , people , secret Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Not Anymore, Thanks to Diabeetus

Tuesday 6 February 9:57:05 UTC 2018

butter diabeetus paula dean Pie Chart - 5640852480 Graph by: jiggles117 Tagged: butter , diabeetus , paula dean , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Is He Even Trying?

Tuesday 6 February 9:56:51 UTC 2018

Bar Graph guns superhero movies villains - 6270500608 Graph by: Iamsang1616 Tagged: Bar Graph , guns , superhero movies , villains Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Wouldn't Like Them When They're Angry

Tuesday 6 February 9:56:50 UTC 2018

boss battle chickens legend of zelda Pie Chart video games - 6481197568 Get Over Here and Play a Video Game Graph by: olivia221 Tagged: boss battle , chickens , legend of zelda , Pie Chart , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Every winter it's the big debate: Do you clear your driveway for less than 3" of snow? [Unlikely]

Tuesday 6 February 8:43:09 UTC 2018

Unlikely [link] [182 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It turns out for Steve Wynn, the 'G' in GILF does not stand for 'gambler' [Strange]

Tuesday 6 February 7:59:28 UTC 2018

Strange [link] [52 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drunk man who went streaking on the fairway of the Phoenix Open and was arrested for indecent exposure: "It was worth it" [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 7:52:09 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man answers ad that offers help to get out of timeshare. Winds up buying second timeshare [Dumbass]

Tuesday 6 February 7:44:07 UTC 2018

Dumbass [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » A Changeable City

Tuesday 6 February 6:34:55 UTC 2018

In his letters, Tchaikovsky comes to two contrary impressions of Venice in the space of three years: April 17, 1874: “Now I will tell you about Venice. It is a place in which — had I to remain for long — I should hang myself on the fifth day from sheer despair. The entire life of the place centres in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » An obviously better get-rich-quick scheme than the stock market: Steal a bucket of gold, launder it with the Russian mob, hide most of it in a locker that only your lover knows about, flee to Ecuador and hope someone just mails the rest to you [Muric

Tuesday 6 February 3:50:04 UTC 2018

Murica [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two drinks a day can help you fight Alzheimer's, whereas six drinks a day can help you fight anyone in the bar [Repeat]

Tuesday 6 February 3:04:04 UTC 2018

Repeat [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Runners get the shaft after receiving a free t-shirt for completing the Dewsbury 10k run [Giggity]

Tuesday 6 February 1:50:04 UTC 2018

Giggity [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this cold cave [Photoshop]

Tuesday 6 February 1:00:01 UTC 2018

Photoshop [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fell victim to the Superb Owl "hangover" where the DJ has problems functioning on a couple of hours sleep. The server gets put into autopilot mixing music and comedy for tonight's Paul's Memory Bank at 8PM ET [Audio]

Tuesday 6 February 0:30:45 UTC 2018

Audio [link] [12 comments] [Link]

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