John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Icelandic man tries to sell you on culinary merits of skata, the national equivalent of durian. "It is one of the most debated gastronomic issues in Icelandic society, even more than putrefied shark" [Strange]

Monday 25 December 22:09:45 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [135 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this home on the range [Photoshop]

Monday 25 December 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's the most wonderful time of year: when we review the objects idiots got stuck in their various body orifices over the last twelve months. "It was a one-in-a-million shot, doc. I'm tellin' ya" [Fail]

Monday 25 December 20:49:45 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [126 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pope calls for peace in the Middle East. This is not a repeat since the first Christmas [Interesting]

Monday 25 December 19:45:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Moscow bus decides it would rather take the subway [Scary]

Monday 25 December 19:05:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Step 1: Take off your top. Step 2: Steal Baby Jesus from Vatican nativity. Step 3: Defeat the patriarchy? [Strange]

Monday 25 December 18:41:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 8-year-old killed two adults in 2008. He's now about to anonymously walk free. They still don't know why he killed them [Strange]

Monday 25 December 18:07:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [235 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yeah go ahead and rob a store in one of the country's busiest airports on the Friday before Christmas. I'm sure that the cops won't be around. Oh what's that? You're also on the DEA's Most Wanted list? [Dumbass]

Monday 25 December 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Silver and Gold

Monday 25 December 17:44:26 UTC 2017

I know of only one triple pun that is also an accurate touché. A visitor who came in upon the wife of Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree while she was giving her daughter a geography lesson, asked the child: ‘What is the capital of the Rothschilds?’ Answered the mother: ‘Bering Straits.’ (The Baring family, it is perhaps permissible to add, were … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The original war on Christmas was started by the Society for the Prevention of Useless Giving [Amusing]

Monday 25 December 16:50:04 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Best. Gift. Ever [Spiffy]

Monday 25 December 16:30:06 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nothing says Merry Christmas like spelling out the words with more than 7,000 dominos, Christmas ornaments, mistletoe, Christmas lights and way the hell too much time on your hands [Cool]

Monday 25 December 15:30:06 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Creepy low-life racist is hiding out in Ohio. OK, everybody in Ohio, looks like it's time to pin the Klan hat on the douchebag racist [Sick]

Monday 25 December 14:05:07 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [195 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Captain Steroid presents his 8th Annual X-Mas Photoshop Contest. Theme: Weird holiday photo. Top 3 'shops receive 1 month FREE TotalFARK. Difficulty: Non-TFers only. Contest ends @ 11pm CT. Merry X-Mas, everyone. 🙂 [Photoshop]

Monday 25 December 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Nobody Shoots at Santa Claus

Monday 25 December 13:50:38 UTC 2017

Not entirely true.

Newsweek – Feb 15, 1965

Arizona Daily Star – Dec 25, 2013 [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you crashed into a utility pole, taking out the bottom half but leaving the top suspend in midair, the police would really like a call explaining how you managed it [Fail]

Monday 25 December 13:50:05 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » American propaganda at its best: The real reasons for NORAD's "SantaCams" on Christmas Eve and how it all came about [Interesting]

Monday 25 December 13:20:07 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yes [Live]

Monday 25 December 12:20:06 UTC 2017

Live [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Merry Christmas 2017!

Monday 25 December 12:02:00 UTC 2017

Santa phones Alfred E. Newman?

Hope you all have a swell day!

[Link]

GraphJam » Not Pictured: They Just Pooped

Monday 25 December 9:39:48 UTC 2017

bathrooms hygiene Pie Chart washing - 4765168896 SHAME Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bathrooms , hygiene , Pie Chart , washing Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » This Building Looks FABULOUS

Monday 25 December 9:39:42 UTC 2017

architects building clothes engineers fabulous gay straight venn diagram - 4375416064 Graph by: fotsifotsi Tagged: architects , building , clothes , engineers , fabulous , gay , straight , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Uses of an electronic stud finder

Monday 25 December 9:39:41 UTC 2017

christmas graphjam husband situational humor - 1677751552 LoL by: Kalli Breda Tagged: christmas , graphjam , husband , situational humor Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Consequences of Discovering a Superhero's Secret Identity

Monday 25 December 9:39:38 UTC 2017

comics movies superhero TV - 1606320896 LoL by: kayqy Tagged: comics , movies , superhero , TV Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Japanese population according to the average person.

Monday 25 December 9:39:31 UTC 2017

bishounen cosplay giant japanese lolita monster ninja Pie Chart population schoolgirls - 2582623488 Graph by: whimsyy Tagged: bishounen , cosplay , giant , japanese , lolita , monster , ninja , Pie Chart , population , schoolgirls Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Got 99 Problems, and They're All Dinkelberg

Monday 25 December 9:39:29 UTC 2017

99 problems blame dinkleberg governement Pie Chart - 5870326272 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: 99 problems , blame , dinkleberg , governement , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Harlem NOPE

Monday 25 December 9:39:28 UTC 2017

dont-do-it horrible harlem shake - 7256780544 Graph by: justindaneau Tagged: dont-do-it , horrible , harlem shake Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Awkwardness Ensues

Monday 25 December 9:39:27 UTC 2017

pie charts ads graphs funny - 4457674496 Graph by: Happy5790 Tagged: pie charts , ads , graphs , funny Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Think It Was Supposed to Be About Love or Something

Monday 25 December 9:39:25 UTC 2017

kristen stewart twilight Pie Chart - 7046901504 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: kristen stewart , twilight , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Ice is Back With a Brand New Invention!

Monday 25 December 9:39:23 UTC 2017

ice ice baby Vanilla Ice venn diagrams graphs funny - 4458265856 Graph by: swan854 Tagged: ice ice baby , Vanilla Ice , venn diagrams , graphs , funny Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Quantity vs price in restaurants

Monday 25 December 9:39:21 UTC 2017

cost diners fast food gourmet high class Line Graph McDonald's price quantity restaurant - 2440308480 Graph by: Staz Tagged: cost , diners , fast food , gourmet , high class , Line Graph , McDonald's , price , quantity , restaurant Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Back Away From the Phone

Monday 25 December 9:39:20 UTC 2017

crush phone Pie Chart texting - 4766591744 Graph by: Tagged: crush , phone , Pie Chart , texting Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » So What Does That Make You?

Monday 25 December 9:39:17 UTC 2017

intelligence internet meta news RPGs trolls venn diagram venn diagrams - 4533478656 Graph by: nonhydrogenated Tagged: intelligence , internet , meta , news , RPGs , trolls , venn diagram , venn diagrams Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Graph Boredom

Monday 25 December 9:39:16 UTC 2017

bored ms pacman - 2432554240 Graph by: Kraygh Tagged: bored , ms pacman Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » SunshinePurpleromance123

Monday 25 December 9:39:13 UTC 2017

hacking lulzsec passwords - 4875483136 A visual representation of the most common passwords, as determined by recent Sony password leaks. 'Scuse me while I change all of my passwords. Graph by: (via www.reddit.com) Tagged: hacking , lulzsec , passwords Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Slightly Alarming

Monday 25 December 9:39:05 UTC 2017

alarming Bar Graph murder whatdoestheinternetthink - 5945644544 And .2% really couldn't care less… Graph by: VINDEX Tagged: alarming , Bar Graph , murder , whatdoestheinternetthink Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Dial M for Misdial

Monday 25 December 9:39:03 UTC 2017

alfred hitchock dial m keyguard murder phone Pie Chart pocket - 4291959040 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: alfred hitchock , dial m , keyguard , murder , phone , Pie Chart , pocket Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Teens Are Really Personable People

Monday 25 December 9:39:00 UTC 2017

teens text message ask out - 4515826176 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: teens , text message , ask out Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Well, Christmas is finally here, and you know what that means. Yes, Easter egg displays in stores [Facepalm]

Monday 25 December 8:08:34 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Skiers in the French Alps get an early Christmas present as they get stuck on a gondola high above the ground [Scary]

Monday 25 December 7:33:35 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Maybe requiring a signature for the delivery of $5,000 in kidney medication would have been a good idea [Sick]

Monday 25 December 7:26:19 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 183: An Everest Mystery

Monday 25 December 7:00:09 UTC 2017

In 1924 two British mountaineers set out to be the first to conquer Mount Everest. But they never returned to camp, and to this day no one knows whether they reached the top. In this week’s episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll review the case of George Mallory and Andrew Irvine, which has been called “one of the greatest … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's gotten to where a Muslim can't even celebrate Christmas without receiving death threats. From other Muslims [Awkward]

Monday 25 December 6:27:27 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Is the Christmas Pickle a real thing? It's been awhile since we had a decent pickle incident. Hiding the pickle in a Christmas tree is an old German tradition. True or False? How many of you have a pickle in your tree right now? Be honest [Weird]

Monday 25 December 6:01:33 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [112 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This just in: Santa moving to south pole due to climate change. Oh, Canada [Silly]

Monday 25 December 5:57:41 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Town in N.J. tries to prevent non-residents from driving on its streets. "Freie Fahrt für freie Bürger" is obviously a foreign concept [Asinine]

Monday 25 December 5:26:02 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [103 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Have a creepy little Christmas with these unsettling Victorian cards. Come and see Santa abducting kids, stay for the Christmas goats [Weird]

Monday 25 December 4:17:01 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ninety-nine cans of beer in the case, ninety-nine cans of beer. Take one oot and pass it aboot, ninety-eight cans of beer in the case [Spiffy]

Monday 25 December 3:39:44 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Widow asks son for a heart monitor after monthly electric utility bill hits $284 billion. Jeez, unplug the Christmas lights, Mom [Unlikely]

Monday 25 December 2:49:59 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Will the real reborn Jesus please step forward so we can write off the rest of these heathens from around the world? [Amusing]

Monday 25 December 2:30:48 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Women used to be much, much hotter [Weird]

Monday 25 December 1:22:32 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this demonstration of what we call a "laser" [Photoshop]

Monday 25 December 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Even on Christmas Eve… reset the clock [Satire]

Monday 25 December 0:30:23 UTC 2017

Satire [link] [63 comments] [Link]

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