John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » With someone pooping on so many lawns in this town, police admit they don't have much to go on [Sick]

Wednesday 13 December 23:43:25 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » World Health Organization says medical marijuana has no public health risks and should not be withheld from patients, World Health Organization officials [Spiffy]

Wednesday 13 December 23:16:45 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [105 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The BBC covers the CIA's guide for office warfare. Now, you too can be a saboteur though inefficiency, complaining, and potentially hiding behind the copy machine with a makeshift garrote constructed from office supplies [Interesting]

Wednesday 13 December 22:50:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If your kid gets a drone for Christmas, remember to register their name, address, email, and ID number with the government. Or if you don't like paperwork you could get them a nice AR-15 [PSA]

Wednesday 13 December 22:36:45 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [122 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Aquarium finds novel way to keep nativity scene safe from vandals [Scary]

Wednesday 13 December 22:24:21 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yes, every great artist should sign their masterpieces, but hold on there, liver surgeon [Sick]

Wednesday 13 December 22:16:45 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bad: a couple boards your Flight with a pair of fussy babies. Good: they considerately pass out noise cancelling headphones to the other passengers. Holy Shiat: it's George and Amal Clooney [Cool]

Wednesday 13 December 21:20:05 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [99 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these selfie snappers [Photoshop]

Wednesday 13 December 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A probable cause affidavit states the man told officers his wife, Taylor Swift, "told me to kill him" [Amusing]

Wednesday 13 December 20:38:04 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hip-hop grandpa dressed as an elf brings cheer to everyone [Cool]

Wednesday 13 December 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Meat may soon be taxed to fight greenhouse gas emissions. You'd think they'd go after cabbage first [Unlikely]

Wednesday 13 December 19:20:05 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [118 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Another year, another lineup featuring ridiculous Williams-Sonoma Christmas merchandise. Includes floaters and SMEG, for extra LOLs [Amusing]

Wednesday 13 December 18:50:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [101 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Orcas near South Africa learn how to flip endangered Great White Sharks to make them helpless, then eat their livers. Only about 2000 Great Whites left in the wild. In other news, Great White shark livers are delicious [Giggity]

Wednesday 13 December 18:40:27 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [121 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Much like your mother, Detroit expects to get 5 to 8 inches tonight [Interesting]

Wednesday 13 December 18:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Resolution

Wednesday 13 December 18:06:40 UTC 2017

Image: Wikimedia Commons Australia’s ARM Architecture designed the 31-story Swanston Square apartment building in Melbourne with custom-shaped white balconies against black windows, so that from a distance the face of Aboriginal leader William Barak emerges. It’s situated to face the Shrine of Remembrance, which honors Australians who have served in war. “The site has this potential to be a very significant … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oklahoma City zoo got a hippopotamus for Christmas. Gayla Peevey was there and approves [Cool]

Wednesday 13 December 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » California's Skirball Fire caused by illegal cooking fire at homeless camp. "It does appear as if people were sleeping and cooking in that area. The fire department was not aware of this encampment prior to the fire" [Interesting]

Wednesday 13 December 17:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [160 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's that time of year again when people send you these bricks of fruit called fruitcakes during the holidays, but what exactly are they? [Interesting]

Wednesday 13 December 16:50:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [116 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Forget "The Last Jedi" – let's all remember the time Harrison Ford was forced to spend Christmas with Chewbacca's dysfunctional, sex-crazed family [Weird]

Wednesday 13 December 16:20:05 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [133 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Seriously, how can somebody forget a baby by the sidewalk? [Dumbass]

Wednesday 13 December 15:50:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you eat brussels sprouts for some reason, you could spend up to 1000% more [Strange]

Wednesday 13 December 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [94 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Not ever to dance again

Wednesday 13 December 14:06:17 UTC 2017

Is the ad implying that one of her legs got infected from a dirty bandage and had to be amputated? Or perhaps a foot? Because that's the only reason I can think of why she'll never dance again.

Pittsburgh Press – Nov 8, 1936 [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Nixon and Snooks

Wednesday 13 December 14:06:16 UTC 2017

Original article here.


Original article here.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this athletic effort [Photoshop]

Wednesday 13 December 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Broadway dog confused by Cats. Enjoy your Woofday Wednesday [Silly]

Wednesday 13 December 14:00:00 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [111 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sheriff's department apologizes for photo showing a needle with the caption: "NARCAN: Robbing Darwin of his bountiful harvest since 1971" [Murica]

Wednesday 13 December 13:50:06 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [240 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kim Jong-Un will profit off of Bitcoin rather handsomely (possible nsfw content on page) [Creepy]

Wednesday 13 December 13:10:10 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Roy Moore once again refuses to take "no" for an answer [Followup]

Wednesday 13 December 12:05:39 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [337 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Robot carries Olympic torch in South Korea. Robot expected to do well in the "taking away jobs" marathon event [Strange]

Wednesday 13 December 11:34:54 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [58 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » I'm a Soulless Machine

Wednesday 13 December 10:37:04 UTC 2017

charity events facebook Pie Chart - 4706488064 They can judge me all they want, miserable do-gooders. Graph by: dbrockman Tagged: charity , events , facebook , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Average person's conception of themself by age

Wednesday 13 December 10:37:03 UTC 2017

age average cool ego feelings kings self image world - 2032514816 Graph by: usctrojanfan77 Tagged: age , average , cool , ego , feelings , kings , self image , world Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Fear of Change vs. Addiction to Change

Wednesday 13 December 10:37:02 UTC 2017

best of week coca cola coke pepsi pop soda - 5402658304 Graph by: JBrah93 Tagged: best of week , coca cola , coke , pepsi , pop , soda Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » And a Well-Made Toy!

Wednesday 13 December 10:37:01 UTC 2017

cancer happy meal McDonald's obesity Pie Chart toy - 4272467712 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cancer , happy meal , McDonald's , obesity , Pie Chart , toy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Tournament of Brackets

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:54 UTC 2017

brackets march madness tournament - 5980775168 Graph by: (via The New Yorker) Tagged: brackets , march madness , tournament Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Definition of "no offense"

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:52 UTC 2017

definition jackass offend offense Pie Chart - 2759604736 Graph by: Aqp Tagged: definition , jackass , offend , offense , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things People Do While Driving

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:46 UTC 2017

cell phone driving eating food kids people - 1769209088 LoL by: Sanclestia Tagged: cell phone , driving , eating , food , kids , people Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Difference Is Grease

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:45 UTC 2017

best of week logic meal mom logic noms - 5159923712 My mom says crazy things. Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , logic , meal , mom logic , noms Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I'd Use All of These

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:41 UTC 2017

gross colors crayola crayons rejected - 6796152320 Graph by: markot9 Tagged: gross , colors , crayola , crayons , rejected Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Things You'll See At A Flea Market

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:39 UTC 2017

flea market fleas garbage Jewelry rare - 2403163904 Graph by: Nuetch Tagged: flea market , fleas , garbage , Jewelry , rare Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Bromine, the Tannest Element

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:37 UTC 2017

bro bromine periodic table - 4839153664 Graph by: (via epic4chan) Tagged: bro , bromine , periodic table Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Doctor and I Share Similar Fears

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:34 UTC 2017

scary fear doctor who - 7219038464 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: scary , fear , doctor who Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Don't Forget: 101 Sex Tips That Will Never Ever Work

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:33 UTC 2017

beauty cosmopolitan magazines Pie Chart weight loss women - 5848475136 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: beauty , cosmopolitan , magazines , Pie Chart , weight loss , women Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » U Mad Vegetarians?

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:31 UTC 2017

animals meat u mad vegetarian - 5528565760 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: animals , meat , u mad , vegetarian Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Exxageration

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:28 UTC 2017

bills cell phone expensive insurance parents - 1892276992 LoL by: Unknown Tagged: bills , cell phone , expensive , insurance , parents Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » instruments kids play

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:21 UTC 2017

Bar Graph drums flute guitar Guitar Hero instrument kids Music play saxaphone video games - 2713861632 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Bar Graph , drums , flute , guitar , Guitar Hero , instrument , kids , Music , play , saxaphone , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Venn Diagram of Tastiness

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:20 UTC 2017

best of week foods tasty treats venn diagram yummy - 6253245952 Graph by: (via Roaring Softly) Tagged: best of week , foods , tasty treats , venn diagram , yummy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » They're Extremely Nutritious

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:19 UTC 2017

diet dogs essays excuses pets Pie Chart - 4773655296 Graph by: Dragonjimd Tagged: diet , dogs , essays , excuses , pets , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Moms Who've Got It Going On

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:17 UTC 2017

song moms stacys-mom - 7034352896 Graph by: LardyOne Tagged: song , moms , stacys-mom Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Replotted: It's Everywhere

Wednesday 13 December 10:36:16 UTC 2017

Pie Chart pron replotted - 5708894208 Submitted by: jakeface Tagged: Pie Chart , pron , replotted Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Getting boozed-up by drinking donated wine left by parents and chowing down the pellet food of the school's pet guinea pig is no way to enjoy the holidays, teacher (possible nsfw content on page) [Weird]

Wednesday 13 December 10:24:41 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Would-be burglar doesn't get anything, gives moon instead (NSFW video moment of the moon) [Fail]

Wednesday 13 December 9:33:43 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [9 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » U.S.: "Absolutely, positively, definitely no talks until you lose the Nukes." Best Korea: "Nuh-uh." Rex Tillerson: *BLINK* [Awkward]

Wednesday 13 December 9:13:39 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » From the "Fat Chance" Department – If you picked up any bank robbery cash thrown on 15 Freeway, police would like it back [Unlikely]

Wednesday 13 December 8:45:04 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Mysterious Ways

Wednesday 13 December 6:31:52 UTC 2017

Image: Flickr Between 1950 and 1964, Meyer Wertlieb rented a garage in Washington D.C. to James Hampton, a janitor who worked at the General Services Administration. When Hampton died, Wertlieb opened the garage and found a throne. Hampton, the son of a minister, had been born in South Carolina in 1909. In 1928 he moved to Washington to share an apartment … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Australian town had one job to do for its 150th birthday celebration: remember the actual date [Fail]

Wednesday 13 December 5:37:53 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You want Jurassic Park? Because that's how you get Jurassic Park [Interesting]

Wednesday 13 December 4:15:52 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hey, baby. Wanna come back to my Pepco substation? [Strange]

Wednesday 13 December 3:42:32 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And now some good news: London's Euston station to turn into homeless shelter for 200 people on Christmas Day [Sappy]

Wednesday 13 December 3:41:00 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Roy Moore banned from National Mall [NewsFlash]

Wednesday 13 December 3:39:31 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [1652 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm a shaaaaark, I'm a shaaaaark, enjoy your honeymoon, I'm a shaaaaark [Scary]

Wednesday 13 December 2:49:12 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Study from Italy finds that stubbornness increases life expectancy. Subby want to know where they found Italians who weren't stubborn for the control group [Cool]

Wednesday 13 December 2:22:32 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NYC bomb suspect sent Trump a warning, but nobody noticed since it was on Facebook instead of Twitter [Dumbass]

Wednesday 13 December 2:18:54 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you've been putting off your online holiday shopping, get yer butt in gear. UPS, FedEx, DHL are already running days late [PSA]

Wednesday 13 December 1:55:52 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "And if you come this way, you can see some famous artifacts from early human history and over here some famous paintings from the renaissance era…and now here is a 130 ton fatberg that was found in the sewers" [Strange]

Wednesday 13 December 1:29:12 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Policeman crashes car while off duty and takes off running wearing nothing but his birthday suit. That's a promoting [Facepalm]

Wednesday 13 December 1:02:32 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this whole park [Photoshop]

Wednesday 13 December 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Robotic device helps paralyzed patients walk. Shoulder-mounted cannon still in development [Cool]

Wednesday 13 December 0:35:52 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Here comes Santa B, here comes Santa B, paying layaway at Walmart [Sappy]

Wednesday 13 December 0:09:12 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Car-ma [Dumbass]

Wednesday 13 December 0:06:29 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Texan woman dumps her trash in a Colorado parking lot, discovers that the internet and police love making people like her famous [Dumbass]

Wednesday 13 December 0:02:29 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [85 comments] [Link]

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