John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Nuke Penn State From Orbit: Fraternity Hazing Edition [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 23:50:04 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [113 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Anything is a quote if you're brave enough – Abraham Lincoln [Interesting]

Monday 13 November 23:20:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police in Massachusetts would like to remind the public that you can't just make your own license plates from a pizza box [Obvious]

Monday 13 November 22:50:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Funny thing about trying to get rid of an an art collection that you swiped from the Nazis: No one seems to want the stuff [Interesting]

Monday 13 November 22:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [51 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three women stop, park their cars on dark highway median to argue over love triangle. Since you're reading this here, you know what happens next [Florida]

Monday 13 November 22:14:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Jared Fogle: "I'm sovereign citizen, you have no jurisdiction over me, release me." Judge: "lol no" [Amusing]

Monday 13 November 21:50:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [134 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Donald "Scooty Putt Putt" Trump Jr. was Twitter DMing with Wikileaks for months [NewsFlash]

Monday 13 November 21:39:03 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [407 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently police are confounding American white supremacists the same way Sheriff Bart delayed Hedley Lamarr's goon squad from destroying Rock Ridge [Amusing]

Monday 13 November 21:20:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this lonesome plant [Photoshop]

Monday 13 November 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Good news for millennials, there's now a new generation between '77 and '83 that we can dump on [Interesting]

Monday 13 November 20:50:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [126 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Burner phones generate tens of millions in revenue every year. No wait, make that PAYPHONES. In related news, when's the last time you used one, and subsequently felt the need to take a disinfecting shower after hanging up? [Strange]

Monday 13 November 20:20:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [107 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » THE Ohio Cheaters [Obvious]

Monday 13 November 19:47:08 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [88 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In a move that will surely never come back to bite us, the US is now arming Iranian militants in Iraq [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 19:20:05 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [92 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you are going to wreck your car, why not do it at an event for Emergency Responders [Spiffy]

Monday 13 November 18:20:06 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Marine Warfare

Monday 13 November 18:12:04 UTC 2017

Humans tend to abuse sea creatures, so digital artist Neil Mendoza gave them a way to fight back. As Smashie the fish swims around his aquatic habitat, he takes aim at the human habitat outside; the hammer drops periodically when a rotating cam releases it. Mendoza created the project through Autodesk’s artist-in-residence program. You can build your own “fish hammer … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Only pay phone near Ice Caves to be removed, further threatening Clark Kent's ability to change into Superman [Interesting]

Monday 13 November 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Welcome aboard United Flight 1867. If you look out at the starboard wing, you'll see our in-flight meal of roasted, pureed seagull being prepared in the engine" [Scary]

Monday 13 November 17:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "OK, going out for some smokes." *42 years later* "I'm back" [Weird]

Monday 13 November 16:08:36 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [77 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Artwork Khrushchev Probably Would Not Have Liked 7

Monday 13 November 15:40:20 UTC 2017

Artist's Wikipedia entry here. [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Miss Vacant Lot of the World

Monday 13 November 15:20:00 UTC 2017

The Miss Vacant Lot of the World contest was started in 1972. It was part of the Annual Armadillo Exposition and Confab held in Victoria, Texas. The contest rules were as follows:

The contest will be open to women between the ages of 18 and 65. Mandatory requirements of the contest will be certified proof of one of the following … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's OK, everyone. Not all of the 200 containers deputies found at this drunk man's home had explosive substances in them. Some just had "bodily fluids" [Scary]

Monday 13 November 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [92 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these heads [Photoshop]

Monday 13 November 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Naked man stabbed to death in Oklahoma City probably didn't plan on being in this headline [Scary]

Monday 13 November 13:20:06 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guns were drawn and punches were thrown during the raid of a drug house. Only this time it was the cops fighting each other while the homeowner stood and watched [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 13:05:33 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [139 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Costa Shaker [News]

Monday 13 November 12:48:34 UTC 2017

News [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woodchippers always have the nom nom nom, so yeah falling into one would make it hungry for more. Welcome to Queensland, Australia [Scary]

Monday 13 November 12:20:25 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Washington Post laments that Gawker isn't around to enjoy this [Unlikely]

Monday 13 November 11:16:34 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » After being caught molesting children at birthday party, New York man inexplicably falls to his death instead of ascending to U.S. Senate [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 9:29:34 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [92 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » Forgot Nutella for My Spoons!

Monday 13 November 9:17:37 UTC 2017

grocery store memory nutella Pie Chart shopping spoons - 4356666880 Graph by: snarkmode Tagged: grocery store , memory , nutella , Pie Chart , shopping , spoons Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What you do when you enter a hotel room

Monday 13 November 9:17:35 UTC 2017

Cheezburger Image 3670062080 What you do when you enter a hotel room. Graph by: Unknown Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Is It Game Over for Console Gaming?

Monday 13 November 9:17:33 UTC 2017

industry console video games infographic game over - 6938197248 Source: Kapitall Graph by: (via Daily Infographic ) Tagged: industry , console , video games , infographic , game over Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I'm On a Graph, Better Drink My Own Piss

Monday 13 November 9:17:31 UTC 2017

bear grylls better drink my own piss Pie Chart survival - 5578388736 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bear grylls , better drink my own piss , Pie Chart , survival Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The chance my Boss will walk into my office vs. What's on my screen

Monday 13 November 9:17:30 UTC 2017

ads boss computer Office technology work - 1412851968 LoL by: Unknown Tagged: ads , boss , computer , Office , technology , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Words that Rhyme With 'Noodle'

Monday 13 November 9:17:29 UTC 2017

books dr seuss kids rhyme words - 1539997440 LoL by: TheCapm Tagged: books , dr seuss , kids , rhyme , words Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » One Does not Simply Walk Into a Middle Earth Vacation

Monday 13 November 9:17:25 UTC 2017

Lord of the Rings new zealand middle earth vacation - 7828332800 Graph by: nataliebaggins Tagged: Lord of the Rings , new zealand , middle earth , vacation Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Knowledge vs Time

Monday 13 November 9:17:24 UTC 2017

end exam first knowledge lecture Line Graph term time - 3031176960 Graph by: turbominkia Tagged: end , exam , first , knowledge , lecture , Line Graph , term , time Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What I Do Not Want My Child to See

Monday 13 November 9:17:23 UTC 2017

30s audience child children desperate housewife dialogue early funny hannah montana kids kissing laughs men mild not old Pie Chart posing say sitcom studio teenagers think TV venn diagram want women - 3226891520 Graph by: ddavis82991 Tagged: 30s , audience , child , children , desperate housewife , dialogue , early , funny , hannah montana , kids , kissing , laughs , men , mild , not , old , Pie Chart , posing , say , sitcom , studio , teenagers , think , TV , venn diagram , want , … [Link]

GraphJam » Time spent playing with a yo-yo

Monday 13 November 9:17:21 UTC 2017

Pie Chart playing rolling time yo yo - 3077162240 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Pie Chart , playing , rolling , time , yo yo Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Only Time I Visit Facebook

Monday 13 November 9:17:19 UTC 2017

frustration internet Pie Chart slow websites - 4662507264 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: frustration , internet , Pie Chart , slow , websites Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Child's Estimate of Parents' IQ

Monday 13 November 9:17:18 UTC 2017

adult age children estimate IQ Line Graph parents teenage - 2517288704 Graph by: fdes Tagged: adult , age , children , estimate , IQ , Line Graph , parents , teenage Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What Does Lizard Look Like?

Monday 13 November 9:17:16 UTC 2017

hand games paper Pie Chart rock scissors Spock - 4780793856 Graph by: (via nathanthenerd) Tagged: hand games , paper , Pie Chart , rock , scissors , Spock Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Replotted: It Just Isn't a Snow Day Without Graphs

Monday 13 November 9:17:13 UTC 2017

facebook Pie Chart posting self referential snow snow day - 5433389056 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: facebook , Pie Chart , posting , self referential , snow , snow day Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Mine Actually Contains a Pen, and an Old Sandwhich

Monday 13 November 9:17:11 UTC 2017

action briefcase explosions guns movies Pie Chart - 5898344192 Graph by: BasementCatsAdvocate Tagged: action , briefcase , explosions , guns , movies , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Race Windu

Monday 13 November 9:17:10 UTC 2017

flow chart lightsaber Mace Windu purple racism Samuel L Jackson star wars - 4486668544 Are you sure they're black? Here's how to tell. Graph by: Luc Jenson Tagged: flow chart , lightsaber , Mace Windu , purple , racism , Samuel L Jackson , star wars Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Belief in Santa

Monday 13 November 9:17:08 UTC 2017

christmas holiday santa - 1477360896 LoL by: Essylt Tagged: christmas , holiday , santa Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Age vs Tactfulness

Monday 13 November 9:17:03 UTC 2017

adult age child elderly fat Line Graph loud obvious pre teen small tactfulness teen whisper - 2816595968 Graph by: soul_grafitti Tagged: adult , age , child , elderly , fat , Line Graph , loud , obvious , pre teen , small , tactfulness , teen , whisper Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Fight.

Monday 13 November 9:17:01 UTC 2017

apologizing fight point proving swear words threatening time - 3197838080 Graph by: alexxandraa Tagged: apologizing , fight , point , proving , swear words , threatening , time Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Tiredness Dilemma

Monday 13 November 9:16:59 UTC 2017

dilemma funny Line Graph tired - 5610403072 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: dilemma , funny , Line Graph , tired Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Never Too Fast, Never Too Affordable

Monday 13 November 9:16:57 UTC 2017

awesomeness technology Line Graph the internet - 7878388224 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: awesomeness , technology , Line Graph , the internet Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Pet All the Goggies!

Monday 13 November 9:16:54 UTC 2017

dogs goggies pet store Pie Chart - 5526773504 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: dogs , goggies , pet store , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Arguments, How Do They Work?

Monday 13 November 9:16:51 UTC 2017

angry arguement best of week flow chart girls guys Memes - 6363624448 Graph by: dcsooner Tagged: angry , arguement , best of week , flow chart , girls , guys , Memes Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Neil Patrick Harris Deserves His Own Graph

Monday 13 November 9:16:50 UTC 2017

andy samberg armie hammer preppy venn jock ryan lochte James Franco tim tebow dude - 7667020288 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: andy samberg , armie hammer , preppy , venn , jock , ryan lochte , James Franco , tim tebow , dude Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Good news if you're hoping to go to college in Virginia: Colleges are waiving their application fees for "College Application Week." So that's a good $30 or $40 off the six-figure debt you'll have later in life. Go chase those dre

Monday 13 November 8:46:25 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman discovers the identity of the man who had been leaving flowers at the grave of her 12-year-old brother for nearly 70 years [Followup]

Monday 13 November 8:31:41 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In case you've ever wondered what a three-and-a-half carrier strike group looks like, the Navy took a few pictures [Spiffy]

Monday 13 November 7:40:33 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [200 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New study shows that women are less likely to receive CPR from bystanders and therefore more likely to die, mainly because everybody is scared to touch a strange woman's chest and be accused of sexual assault. Yay, feminism [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 7:13:41 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [235 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cats only let humans think they domesticated them when in reality it was the other way around [Obvious]

Monday 13 November 7:00:40 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [93 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 177: Averting a Catastrophe in Manhattan

Monday 13 November 7:00:24 UTC 2017

Image: Flickr New York’s Citicorp Tower was an architectural sensation when it opened in 1977. But then engineer William LeMessurier realized that its unique design left it dangerously vulnerable to high winds. In this week’s episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll describe the drama that followed as a small group of decision makers tried to ward off a catastrophe in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Young people are fleeing rural areas because the broadband connections are so terrible [Facepalm]

Monday 13 November 6:52:05 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [131 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pedophile spared jail because. A) He had a good lawyer. B) The evidence wasn't compelling enough. C) His bad back would make prison 'uncomfortable' [Fail]

Monday 13 November 6:34:41 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Rule #1. Keep it in your pants [Stupid]

Monday 13 November 5:53:34 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you left 7 large garbage bags full of weed by the side of the road in North Yorkshire, the police would like a word with you [Strange]

Monday 13 November 4:34:18 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Math teacher suspended and facing termination over misgendering trans student [Stupid]

Monday 13 November 4:10:46 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [224 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » About that Green Beret found dead in Mali…. you can say the investigation into his death is SEAL'd [Fail]

Monday 13 November 3:10:19 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I bet he flipped Rene the bird for like the 200th time while blowing his clippings or leaves onto the guy's lawn [Sick]

Monday 13 November 2:06:43 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop the answer to this age-old question [Photoshop]

Monday 13 November 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Archive

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