John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » RT finally registers as a foreign agent rather than having their assets seized. Russia promises retaliation. "We're not a foreign agent" argument takes a severe beating [Giggity]

Friday 10 November 23:50:07 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you worry about spending too much money on your two pack a day smoking habit you can always move to New Delhi and just breathe normally [Sick]

Friday 10 November 23:20:08 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "I met a man who despised me. He despised me for who I am, a veteran. And you know what? That, that right there, is the highest compliment I could be paid" [Hero]

Friday 10 November 22:50:09 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [187 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » OK, who farted? [Repeat]

Friday 10 November 22:20:01 UTC 2017

Repeat [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Need a laugh? Take a gander at the finalists in this year's Comedy Wildlife Photo contest [Amusing]

Friday 10 November 21:40:01 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [127 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this crab shack [Photoshop]

Friday 10 November 21:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sultry poultry? All the breasts? Get stuffed? Something to gobble? We can go on, or you can just read this very Florida [Florida]

Friday 10 November 20:50:07 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » A Mating Machine

Friday 10 November 20:35:15 UTC 2017

A “no-brainer” by Harvard mathematician (and chess master) Noam Elkies. White has choices as to how to play, but no matter how he proceeds, he’ll wind up mating Black on the seventh move. (From Tim Krabbé’s chess diary.) [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This booby has a problem with crabs [Giggity]

Friday 10 November 20:20:07 UTC 2017

Giggity [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » US Senate to require senators to have sexual harassment training, as if they weren't good enough at it already (bonus: picture in the article is of the Italian senate chamber) [Silly]

Friday 10 November 19:50:07 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Spot me [Followup]

Friday 10 November 19:20:12 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Smoking hot substitute teacher arrested for heavy petting in Kettering and soaking wood in Oakwood [Facepalm]

Friday 10 November 18:50:06 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [240 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "In the history of spaceflight, no casualties due to falling space debris have ever been confirmed." China: Hold my beer and watch between 43°S and 43°N [Interesting]

Friday 10 November 18:20:08 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [140 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Family finds dog lost in tornado, good Samaritans pay his vet bill for treatment of flying monkey trauma [Sappy]

Friday 10 November 16:50:05 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Just as we've always suspected, cats are just biding their time waiting for a chance to kill us [Weird]

Friday 10 November 16:20:06 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Seniors try to decode millennial dating slang" [Facepalm]

Friday 10 November 15:50:04 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [110 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Price was killed when he rushed into a burning pet store to save a litter of purring, adorable kittens. Or maybe not. We all know how he liked to tell stories" [Spiffy]

Friday 10 November 15:20:05 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Has he lost his mind? Can he see or is he blind? A British inventor billed as a real-life version of the superhero Iron Man set a record for fastest speed in a body-controlled jet engine power suit at 32 mph [Spiffy]

Friday 10 November 14:50:04 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mysterious radiation cloud wafting over Europe from Russia. This is not a repeat from 1986 [Scary]

Friday 10 November 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [78 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this kayaker [Photoshop]

Friday 10 November 14:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When you go to the animal shelter, check behind the ear of the dog you want to adopt. If it has a number tattooed there, it was probably used for medical research. Happy adopting [Sad]

Friday 10 November 13:20:07 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [109 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Dirty-Talking Microwave

Friday 10 November 13:17:33 UTC 2017

Wanda Hooper claimed that various electrical appliances around her home (her microwave, curling iron, TV set) were picking up and broadcasting obscene CB radio chatter. Is this really possible? I have no idea. Any radio experts care to weigh in with an opinion?

Alexandria Town Talk – May 1, 1987 [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Billionaire rapist binds and gags the Daily Mail [Scary]

Friday 10 November 12:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [93 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And like magic, here it is: the stupidest thing I've read all day. Fox News legal analyst: Actual victims of sexual predators are 'very few and far between' [Stupid]

Friday 10 November 11:42:24 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [197 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Photographer Leslie Jones

Friday 10 November 10:39:00 UTC 2017

Leslie Jones (1886-1967) seems to have had a quirky sense of humor. I like his series of shots titled "Odd Fences."

You can see more at this link.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kid almost dies from not using a computer [Florida]

Friday 10 November 10:11:24 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [54 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » Breaking Bad for ALL the Categories!

Friday 10 November 9:37:43 UTC 2017

breaking bad television - 7821573120 Submitted by: (via theoldreader.com) Tagged: breaking bad , television Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What You Don't Know Can't Make You Unhappy

Friday 10 November 9:37:42 UTC 2017

best of week happiness ignorance is bliss intelligence Line Graph - 5403432448 Graph by: lazarus90 Tagged: best of week , happiness , ignorance is bliss , intelligence , Line Graph Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Re-Plotted: Why Did I Get Married?

Friday 10 November 9:37:41 UTC 2017

Pie Chart Sad sexytimes wife - 5296047360 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Pie Chart , Sad , sexytimes , wife Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How Battles Work… in 80's Cartoons

Friday 10 November 9:37:32 UTC 2017

80s battles cartoons GI Joe lasers Pie Chart - 6508926720 Graph by: (via Nerduo) Tagged: 80s , battles , cartoons , GI Joe , lasers , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Don't Need It!

Friday 10 November 9:37:29 UTC 2017

jacket mom Pie Chart - 7051965952 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: jacket , mom , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What's Your Literary Coffee Choice?

Friday 10 November 9:37:26 UTC 2017

coffee Chart literature school - 7906625280 Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: coffee , Chart , literature , school Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Monkeys Do Not Cure Loneliness

Friday 10 November 9:37:25 UTC 2017

pet monkey lonely - 4515339520 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: pet , monkey , lonely Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Here's a Llama, There's a…What The?

Friday 10 November 9:37:24 UTC 2017

borrowed infographic language llama weird - 4664468992 Graph by: greatday4awalk Tagged: borrowed , infographic , language , llama , weird Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How Awkard Moments Work

Friday 10 November 9:37:22 UTC 2017

Awkward change laugh moments Pie Chart subject work - 3140459264 Graph by: Edgey Tagged: Awkward , change , laugh , moments , Pie Chart , subject , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » It's One Better Than Four

Friday 10 November 9:37:19 UTC 2017

apple buying iphone 5 Pie Chart - 6584879104 Graph by: Emmer (via Just Say Mehbe ) Tagged: apple , buying , iphone 5 , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Shut Up, Navi

Friday 10 November 9:37:16 UTC 2017

games Pie Chart sidekicks video games zelda - 4664340736 Graph by: joemamaphat Tagged: games , Pie Chart , sidekicks , video games , zelda Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Always Patrick

Friday 10 November 9:37:11 UTC 2017

krusty crab SpongeBob SquarePants patrick - 5168078592 Graph by: Tahlya31 Tagged: krusty crab , SpongeBob SquarePants , patrick Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » At This Rate, the Next Wolverine will be Nearly Nude

Friday 10 November 9:37:10 UTC 2017

xmen infographic wolverine Logan - 7693354496 Graph by: (via Halloween Costumes) Tagged: xmen , infographic , wolverine , Logan Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » First thoughts when told "don't press this button"

Friday 10 November 9:37:09 UTC 2017

button guy listen Pie Chart press pretend scare - 2523597568 Graph by: will_f1986 Tagged: button , guy , listen , Pie Chart , press , pretend , scare Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » None of It Intelligible

Friday 10 November 9:37:06 UTC 2017

babbling nicki minaj Pie Chart profanity - 6257854464 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: babbling , nicki minaj , Pie Chart , profanity Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Wasn't Even Asking a Question

Friday 10 November 9:37:05 UTC 2017

Pie Chart texting message k length - 5371250688 Graph by: ioanalov3 Tagged: Pie Chart , texting , message , k , length Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Untitled

Friday 10 November 9:37:04 UTC 2017

globe Maps sterotypes world - 4949393664 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: globe , Maps , sterotypes , world Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Until You Get Cornered…

Friday 10 November 9:37:03 UTC 2017

parkour Pie Chart running zombie - 6544902912 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: parkour , Pie Chart , running , zombie Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » F5, F5, F5

Friday 10 November 9:37:02 UTC 2017

refresh facebook Pie Chart - 6920203264 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: refresh , facebook , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Supply and Demand be Damned

Friday 10 November 9:37:01 UTC 2017

cost value water coke - 7736373248 Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: cost , value , water , coke Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » And 100% Reason to Remember the Name

Friday 10 November 9:36:59 UTC 2017

fort minor Music percentage Pie Chart remember the name - 6402925568 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: fort minor , Music , percentage , Pie Chart , remember the name Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » A Good Reason To Play GTA Offline

Friday 10 November 9:36:56 UTC 2017

community video games - 7810416128 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: community , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Airport Logic

Friday 10 November 9:36:55 UTC 2017

fluid security planes airport america TSA logic - 7003692032 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: fluid , security , planes , airport , america , TSA , logic Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Moms of the world, it's time to put down the wine and pick up the weed. For the sake of humanity [Obvious]

Friday 10 November 9:20:55 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [151 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "TweakerCam" creator gets ten percent of vote in write-in campaign, plans to start a political action committee. See how bad drugs are? Just putting them on camera turned him into a political junkie [Followup]

Friday 10 November 7:20:14 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Twice Missed

Friday 10 November 6:54:14 UTC 2017

Union general Joseph Hooker had an eventful day at the Battle of Chancellorsville: I was standing on this step of the portico on the Sunday morning of the 3d of May, and was giving direction to the battle, which was now raging with great fury, the cannon-balls reaching me from both the east and the west, when a solid shot … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Why men use masturbation to harass women." Because they're jerks? [Creepy]

Friday 10 November 6:46:37 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [155 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A 10-year deferred sentence was given to daughter for marrying her birth mother. Sick tag has the weirdest boner right now. (Bonus matching shirt mug shot goodness) [Sick]

Friday 10 November 5:59:38 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [143 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not the kind of 'enchanted forest' you want to be stumbling around in after dark [Creepy]

Friday 10 November 4:14:36 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The eternal conflict between Spicolli and Mr. Hand takes a dark turn [Fail]

Friday 10 November 3:50:36 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you have £1.6million-worth of drugs in your home, you might not want to have a 'grenade prone to exploding' lest the police might come investigate (with mugshot goodness) [Fail]

Friday 10 November 3:50:30 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Scientists at Oxford find new super-fuel to enhance human performance. Is it meth? I bet its meth [Interesting]

Friday 10 November 3:49:56 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Vatican to stop selling cigarettes, potentially causing Heavenly discord as a fight erupts between the patron saints of lung cancer and black market sales [Interesting]

Friday 10 November 3:31:28 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Just because she delivers your mail doesn't mean she wants your package [Florida]

Friday 10 November 3:23:37 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pastor demands footage of him reviving parishioner's erection be aired on TV. Well that should raise ratings [Facepalm]

Friday 10 November 3:13:00 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Deadly pallet costs Walmart $7.5 million. Next time just hire Gallagher to hand out the watermelons [Asinine]

Friday 10 November 2:54:32 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [54 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mom arrested after leaving 3-year-old son home alone to go off drinking for 13 hours. Amazingly, her 13-hour binge mug shot looks way better than Subby's following 5 hours of drinking [Florida]

Friday 10 November 2:36:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You know that small Montana company that had the friendly no bid contract. Well one of the lines they "fixed" before the contract was cancelled just failed [Followup]

Friday 10 November 2:34:19 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Charges against people accused of dropping Confederate monument have been dropped [Followup]

Friday 10 November 2:17:37 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If the government says you owe them money, and that you need to pay them in Bitcoin, do I really need to tell you that something ain't right? Apparently so [PSA]

Friday 10 November 1:59:09 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drugs testing positive for fentanyl has gone up by a fair bit in Canada… and by "fair bit", they mean 2,000% [Scary]

Friday 10 November 1:40:42 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » LARP version of Frogger goes about as well as you'd expect [Dumbass]

Friday 10 November 1:22:14 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » All you guys who think you have the 'stash' that mushes the ladies, you haven't met this master of the mustache [Spiffy]

Friday 10 November 1:19:37 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's okay to hold your lighter in the air at a concert when Gun N' Roses plays your favorite song, but please don't do it on a plane that's trying to land [Dumbass]

Friday 10 November 1:03:46 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pretty creepy image [Photoshop]

Friday 10 November 1:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pal with pen is preferable [Creepy]

Friday 10 November 0:56:26 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dad horrified to learn daughter surreptitiously booked trip to Disneyland Paris and used all his frequent flyer miles [Amusing]

Friday 10 November 0:45:19 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not News: Neighbors argue over property line. News: One neighbor posts sign "Your cancer is taking to long". Fark: Sign poster moved in last fall. UltraFark: Quoted as saying "I would rather him be anywhere but here bothering me" [Asi

Friday 10 November 0:26:51 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A British landlord who writes childrens books and Nazi-occupied Britain-themed erotica won't rent to "coloureds" because of the curry smell is your sentient mad lib of the week [Followup]

Friday 10 November 0:08:23 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Archive

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