John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Billionaire pharma CEO who funded anti-cannabis campaign charged with bribing doctors to prescribe opioids; will probably still receive lighter sentence than some guy busted with a dime bag [Dumbass]

Friday 27 October 23:40:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pumpkin Spice conquers the pot brownies. Cannableahs [Sad]

Friday 27 October 23:13:25 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Headline: "These giant robots can pick strawberries. What does that mean for humans?" Well, humans are probably easier to grab with a robot's huge metal claws [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 22:46:45 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why do Romanians like garlic so much? Because they look thinner from a distance [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 22:20:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [54 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nothing to see here, just Hanford cleanup workers pouring radioactive waste directly into the ground [Scary]

Friday 27 October 21:40:45 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Surely that won't arouse any suspicion [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 21:14:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New memorial to crackheads everywhere to be unveiled [Amusing]

Friday 27 October 20:50:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guy leads police on a hour long, 100 MPH+ chase in Ohio. The police comment, "He's a good driver". And by "guy" I mean a 10 year old kid. Sounds like the cops were imitating Ron Burgundy, "Actually, I'm not even mad, that&

Friday 27 October 20:31:54 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Consumer Reports brings out the Grinch early, shows us what 100 calories of our favorite Halloween candies looks like [Sad]

Friday 27 October 20:10:05 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Former FBI Director James Comey has joined Twitter. Photoshop his posting from Iowa [Photoshop]

Friday 27 October 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today marks the 113th anniversary of the New York subway system and the earliest recorded example of New York finishing second in a competition with Boston [Cool]

Friday 27 October 19:50:05 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » School counselor has "sex romp" with 2 students. College. Nope. High school. Nah. Um, Junior High. Nuh-uh. Oh no. No no no no no [Sick]

Friday 27 October 19:44:05 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [99 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You're not allowed to dye your hair, so you must dye your hair. Sorry, I don't make the rules [Asinine]

Friday 27 October 19:20:05 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Cow Rebellion started, it has [Scary]

Friday 27 October 19:03:42 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Priorities

Friday 27 October 19:02:12 UTC 2017

“Once I saw a chimpanzee gaze at a particularly beautiful sunset for a full 15 minutes, watching the changing colors until it became so dark that he had to retire to the forest without stopping to pick a pawpaw for supper.” — Adriaan Kortlandt [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fat, stupid, and hopped up on opioids stolen during Irma is no way to go through life, ossifer [Florida]

Friday 27 October 18:41:53 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Mayo says it's OK to let the dogs sleep in the room with you, if for no other reason than to have a scapegoat for all your farts [Cool]

Friday 27 October 18:38:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dolphin living at controversial Arizona aquarium has died. Whose bright idea was it to open a dolphin aquarium in Arizona anyway? [Sad]

Friday 27 October 18:20:04 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [44 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman: Hi, doctor? I think I have kidney stones. Doctor: Let me check… no stones, but there is a tiny person in here [Awkward]

Friday 27 October 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [80 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 'Murica, where everyone can own a gun but no one can afford to get shot [Murica]

Friday 27 October 17:34:45 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [103 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chicago man awarded $44 million after his cop best friend drunkenly shot him in the head and tried to cover it up with the help of the CPD [Murica]

Friday 27 October 17:10:45 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [83 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mississippi schools kill 'To Kill A Mockingbird' ban [Followup]

Friday 27 October 16:44:05 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Newly-released JFK files reveal CIA tried to kill Castro in very strange ways, including bacteria-laden swimsuits and booby-trapped seashells [Strange]

Friday 27 October 16:20:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not only are pot smokers more relaxed and fun to be around than you, but they're having more sex, too. Although, honestly, that may be sort of a chicken-and-egg thing [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 16:13:31 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [116 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Catalan declares independence after Spain refuses to give them wood for sheep [News]

Friday 27 October 15:49:31 UTC 2017

News [link] [225 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Puppy needs to be revived by Narcan after finding and chewing on opioids it found on the sidewalk. Fark: Vets say it's the fourth time they've had to give Narcan to a dog this year [Scary]

Friday 27 October 15:46:45 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Getting a sex change is all fine and good, however having it done in a motel room by an aircraft engineer who answered your online ad is another thing [Followup]

Friday 27 October 15:16:45 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Caption what this jockey is thinking [Caption]

Friday 27 October 15:00:01 UTC 2017

Caption [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » … — … .-.-.- / -.. — –. / … ..- .–. .–. .-.. -.– / .-. ..- -. -. .. -. –. / .-.. — .– .-.-.- / .–. .-.. . .- … . / … . -. -.. / -.- . – -.-. …. ..- .–. .-.-.- [Sappy]

Friday 27 October 14:46:45 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [225 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Deputies find more than 60 cocks in Oklahoma man's home [Asinine]

Friday 27 October 14:20:05 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today in kangaroo court: An Aussie mum in insurance claims court claims "massive dinosaur-like creature" hit her car [Weird]

Friday 27 October 14:10:04 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Martin Luther nailed his protest up to the church door in 1517. 500 years later, one can wear whatever one wants on his John Thomas [PSA]

Friday 27 October 13:50:04 UTC 2017

PSA [link] [76 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Let's see: Lawyer wins $5.8 million judgment against man for shooting homeless man on his property. Court starts seizing properties. Lawyer found shot dead on porch. Yeah, this is a real whodunit for sure [Scary]

Friday 27 October 13:20:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [195 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this um, science project? [Photoshop]

Friday 27 October 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The anti-daylight saving time revolution has begun on time ..as usual [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 12:50:06 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [101 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You could ask D2S who's a threat, of course. But if you really want to know, ask the people in the military [Obvious]

Friday 27 October 12:19:14 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [111 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Will Catalonia declare independence a day before Caturday? Catalonian legislators introduce independence legislation. This is your Spanish Civil War Deux: Electric Boogaloo discussion thread [News]

Friday 27 October 12:10:45 UTC 2017

News [link] [118 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » So what have we learned so far from the released Kennedy documents? Well, for one thing, the Russkies were alarmed his assassination was part of an "ultra-right coup" to overthrow the government. Huh. Guess they warmed up to that idea [Intere

Friday 27 October 12:02:13 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [113 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Carl's Jr. that survived Northern California firestorm catches fire while cooking up free burgers for firefighters [Ironic]

Friday 27 October 11:48:39 UTC 2017

Ironic [link] [20 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Most Cockroach-Infested Home

Friday 27 October 11:41:54 UTC 2017

In early 1997, Combat Insect Control ran a contest offering a $5000 cash prize to the person with the most cockroach-infested home.

The winner, from over 1000 people who entered, was Mary Esposito of Forest Park, Georgia. She complained that she had roaches living in her dishwasher, refrigerator, oven, coffeemaker, VCR, wallpaper, dresser drawers, and bathtub faucet. An entomologist hired … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bureau of Labor Statistics projects that demand for health care workers will exceed job losses amongst truck drivers and retail cashiers, so at least the mathematicians and data analysts have nothing to worry about [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 11:04:37 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oh, nothing, just a third U.S. carrier strike group moving off the shores of North Korea, which is preparing to test another nuclear device [Scary]

Friday 27 October 10:29:36 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [101 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Queen of the House

Friday 27 October 10:05:00 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » There's something to be said about group of seniors who meet each week to build and decorate their coffins [Cool]

Friday 27 October 9:58:02 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you grew up before color TV was invented you probably dream in black and white [Weird]

Friday 27 October 8:46:01 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [128 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mother who didn't like the way her daughter was reading the good book, gets book thrown at her and plenty of reading time of her own [Dumbass]

Friday 27 October 8:39:45 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [54 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » How Google Glass Goes

Friday 27 October 7:33:24 UTC 2017

technology neat google glass - 7301498112 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: technology , neat , google glass Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » It's the Only Game I Can Run

Friday 27 October 7:33:23 UTC 2017

pie charts computers graphs spider solitaire funny - 7632562176 Graph by: SimmerDown12 Tagged: pie charts , computers , graphs , spider solitaire , funny Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Go Cry, Jon Snow

Friday 27 October 7:33:22 UTC 2017

Game of Thrones Jon Snow mom venn diagram - 6546257920 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Game of Thrones , Jon Snow , mom , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Usage of Shins

Friday 27 October 7:33:21 UTC 2017

calendar find foot guards knee large object shins stylish usage - 2954726400 Graph by: Mulonkey Tagged: calendar , find , foot , guards , knee , large , object , shins , stylish , usage Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Doctor Who: 50 Years of Time Travel in the TARDIS

Friday 27 October 7:33:20 UTC 2017

bbc doctor who timeline interactive doctor who 50th anniversary - 7913297152 See this brilliant interactive timeline get all wibbley-wobbley by clicking here! Submitted by: (via the BBC) Tagged: bbc , doctor who , timeline , interactive , doctor who 50th anniversary Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » whats in snapple

Friday 27 October 7:33:19 UTC 2017

citric acid drink flavor food high fructose corn syrup ingredients juice junk food natural snapple tea water - 3353818368 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: citric acid , drink , flavor , food , high fructose corn syrup , ingredients , juice , junk food , natural , snapple , tea , water Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Study of Ants?

Friday 27 October 7:33:16 UTC 2017

anthropology best of week How People View Me Pie Chart reaction - 5279241984 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: anthropology , best of week , How People View Me , Pie Chart , reaction Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Celebribrowsers

Friday 27 October 7:33:14 UTC 2017

browsers celeb infographic internet - 4794903040 Graph by: (via walyou) Tagged: browsers , celeb , infographic , internet Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » A Wonderfully Misspent Youth

Friday 27 October 7:33:13 UTC 2017

video games Pie Chart - 7963789312 Submitted by: (via Rick Crane) Tagged: video games , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Last I Checked One Hundred Percent Meant Done

Friday 27 October 7:33:11 UTC 2017

100 computers downloading Pie Chart - 6604129280 Graph by: BioBark Tagged: 100 , computers , downloading , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The T-Rex Will Know

Friday 27 October 7:33:09 UTC 2017

coffee dinosaurs flow chart work - 5975650816 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: coffee , dinosaurs , flow chart , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Pretending to Do One of These Things to Avoid You

Friday 27 October 7:33:08 UTC 2017

angry birds iphone smart phone - 4874614784 Graph by: andime Tagged: angry birds , iphone , smart phone Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The #Selfie Phenomenon

Friday 27 October 7:33:07 UTC 2017

selfie cameras infographic - 7859726080 Submitted by: (via visual.ly) Tagged: selfie , cameras , infographic Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Also, Killing Peasants

Friday 27 October 7:33:06 UTC 2017

assassins creed games Pie Chart video games - 4741156608 Graph by: lolwok33 Tagged: assassins creed , games , Pie Chart , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » When You See It… You'll See That It's Actually Racist

Friday 27 October 7:33:04 UTC 2017

black people Pie Chart racist when you see it - 5656413184 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: black people , Pie Chart , racist , when you see it Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Hey, I Was Gonna Go to That

Friday 27 October 7:33:02 UTC 2017

classmates high school reunion venn diagram - 5219502336 Are you trying to say you never want to see me again?! Graph by: rvg1981 Tagged: classmates , high school , reunion , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Then We Wrap the Entire Thing in Bacon

Friday 27 October 7:33:00 UTC 2017

bacon strips Bar Graph epic meal time food Pie Chart youtube - 5757461248 Graph by: NyanNyanNyan1337 Tagged: bacon strips , Bar Graph , epic meal time , food , Pie Chart , youtube Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Reading Rainbow Made Me an English Major

Friday 27 October 7:32:57 UTC 2017

levar burton Pie Chart reading rainbow wishbone - 4596068608 True story. Graph by: PatrickRsGhost Tagged: levar burton , Pie Chart , reading rainbow , wishbone Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Replotted- Pol·i·ti·cian: A Person Who Thinks They Know What's Best for Everyone

Friday 27 October 7:32:56 UTC 2017

church and state Pie Chart Politians politics religion - 5780585472 Graph by: Tagged: church and state , Pie Chart , Politians , politics , religion Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Line Blurs With Beers

Friday 27 October 7:32:54 UTC 2017

crazy gifs hot how i met your mother Line Graph - 5277742080 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: crazy , gifs , hot , how i met your mother , Line Graph Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How Much I Want Something

Friday 27 October 7:32:53 UTC 2017

buy day first month store want - 1657579264 LoL by: MeinHandiKatzen Tagged: buy , day , first , month , store , want Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » So, Not Kentucky Then?

Friday 27 October 7:32:52 UTC 2017

Cheezburger Image 4507573504 Graph by: Unknown Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Whatever, Pie Has Fruit in It

Friday 27 October 7:32:50 UTC 2017

food fruit health pie Pie Chart - 5906486016 Graph by: (via I Love Charts) Tagged: food , fruit , health , pie , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » When Life Gives You Lemons

Friday 27 October 7:32:49 UTC 2017

bitch complain facebook lemonade lemons life Pie Chart - 2696352256 Graph by: Greeny Tagged: bitch , complain , facebook , lemonade , lemons , life , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Nothing Can Stop These Deals!

Friday 27 October 7:32:46 UTC 2017

convenient storm Bar Graph commercials - 7059686656 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: convenient , storm , Bar Graph , commercials Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » They're Not Going to Check the Dates

Friday 27 October 7:32:43 UTC 2017

best of week essays history class Pie Chart school truancy story - 5797343488 Graph by: Reelcheeper Tagged: best of week , essays , history class , Pie Chart , school , truancy story Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Then Comes the Clean Up

Friday 27 October 7:32:42 UTC 2017

cleaning brownies chocolate food Pie Chart - 7050873856 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cleaning , brownies , chocolate , food , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Classic: You're Probably the Least Funny Human I Know

Friday 27 October 7:32:40 UTC 2017

chatspeak funny jokes lol Pie Chart - 5078388992 I remember days when we were younger I used to say LOL and it meant something Graph by: heeeyitsjillian Tagged: chatspeak , funny , jokes , lol , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » My Favorite Song Comes on the Car Radio

Friday 27 October 7:32:38 UTC 2017

radio FAIL song favorite - 7657252864 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: radio , FAIL , song , favorite Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Iowa DOT forced to remind Iowa drivers that deer crossing signs are meant for drivers, not deer, as deer can't read [Facepalm]

Friday 27 October 7:00:37 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Responsible 2nd Amendment advocates sending death threats to Vegas shooting survivors [Murica]

Friday 27 October 6:59:36 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Daddy!

Friday 27 October 6:34:57 UTC 2017

In Rex Stout’s mystery novels, detective Nero Wolfe maintains that he was born in Montenegro, but the stories give conflicting evidence, and after careful study historian Bernard DeVoto concluded that he was really born in the United States sometime between 1892 and 1896, having been conceived in Montenegro between March 1891 and March 1895. Now, Sherlock Holmes had his climactic … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A nurse comforted a dying patient by singing her her favorite song, and my god is it dusty in here [Hero]

Friday 27 October 6:11:39 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm not quite dead yet [Creepy]

Friday 27 October 6:04:39 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » U.S. bishops release translation of exorcism rituals so fast that it would make your head spin [Followup]

Friday 27 October 5:30:42 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And here you thought being a passenger going through airport security was a crappy experience [Stupid]

Friday 27 October 5:30:18 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you've secretly been suspecting that a forgotten level of hell in Dante's Inferno involved being stuck in a house with fifty-six poodles and cockapoos, the Florida Police would like you to know they found it on earth instead [Florida]

Friday 27 October 4:57:59 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [12 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Science Care is the McDonald's of the cadaver supply business. Would you like flies with that? [Creepy]

Friday 27 October 4:15:33 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Marijuana sellers stressed out over software delays. If only they had some way to relax [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 4:11:32 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Vet helps free kitten from wheel, with cutest pics of my new patented 'kitten spinner' you'll ever see [Sappy]

Friday 27 October 4:05:04 UTC 2017

Sappy [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The most Wisconsin thing you'll read all day: "Man locked in Kwik Trip beer cooler stays and drinks" [Silly]

Friday 27 October 3:40:44 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Florida woman gets arrested for stealing pavers, threatens to sue because she hurt her back while stealing them [Florida]

Friday 27 October 3:15:32 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What does it mean in this era of hating Muslims when Americans are trying more Islamic food? Halal if I know [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 3:03:48 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [110 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Convicted drug dealer's movie memorabilia collection goes under the hammer. Who'll start the bidding on this Batboat? [Cool]

Friday 27 October 2:50:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ok, which one of you Farkers is messing with the electronic road signs in Queens? [Amusing]

Friday 27 October 2:41:00 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Do you want ghosts scaring off your tourists? Because this is how you get ghosts scaring off your tourists [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 2:20:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » North Carolina teenagers may or may not be in trouble for acting like their parents and grandparents [Stupid]

Friday 27 October 1:54:31 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » He who represents himself has a total stoner as a client. Behold the trial of NJ Weedman [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 1:50:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oklahoma Supreme Court rules convenience stores can be sued for selling alcohol to intoxicated customers, cutting their business in half [Interesting]

Friday 27 October 1:20:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kiss NAFTA goodbye. The U.S. negotiators are following the Trump model for negotiations: bigly bullying, complete chaos and pointless posturing [Fake]

Friday 27 October 1:13:41 UTC 2017

Fake [link] [89 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Elderly couple gets unexplained Amazon packages for months. Holding a breast pump, woman says, "When you're 83 years old, that is very weird" [Silly]

Friday 27 October 0:50:04 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Just a Little One

Friday 27 October 0:20:12 UTC 2017

Cubicle #1: Oh no, today is Tuesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Umm… Today is the 12th. Tomorrow is the 13th. And humpday!
Cubicle #1: Oh no! Wednesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Well, it’s the day before Valentine’s Day. You got your wife something already, right?
Cubicle #1: Dang! I better think of something quick, right?
Cubicle #2: You … [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Which You've Already Done by Wearing Such a Loud Tie.

Friday 27 October 0:20:10 UTC 2017

Temp: It's so silent in here.
Boss: Don't ruin the magic. East Circle Drive
East Lansing, Michigan [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Tonight on SportsChat: Wankers Talk Wanking

Friday 27 October 0:20:09 UTC 2017

Designer: Gosh, I just hate when you’re watching a porn and they cut to the guy’s face. It’s always such an unfortunate time. I should write a letter of complaint.
IT guy: Yeah, if you only had a free hand. Leverington Avenue
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Overheard by: JB [Link]

Overheard In The Office » 4PM Hire New Intern

Friday 27 October 0:20:08 UTC 2017

Intern: I’ve got to start looking for a job.
Secretary: Did you talk to your Placement Office about networking?
Intern: They sent me some contacts. But they were in the Pacific.
Secretary: Did you contact them?
Intern: I don’t even speak Japan. 1010 Gratiot Avenue
Saginaw, Michigan [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Fortunately Your Backup Alarm Saved My Rear Quarter Panel

Friday 27 October 0:20:07 UTC 2017

Coworker, about near-collision the night before: Mark*, I swear when I looked back last night you weren't pulling out! (entire office collapses in giggles) Hailey, Idaho [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Canadian Employees Often Face This Kind Of Harassment

Friday 27 October 0:20:06 UTC 2017

Female boss, demanding computer use from underling: I want your SAP! Cardiff
Wales Overheard by: Sean [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Only the Ones With Hearing Aids

Friday 27 October 0:20:05 UTC 2017

Two nursing assistants were feeding old men at the home. Nursing assistant #1: Wow, you’re a really awesome chewer.
Nursing assistant #2: I bet you say that to all the guys. 694 Isaac Prugh Way
Kettering, Ohio [Link]

Overheard In The Office » I Hate This Fucking Place So Much.

Friday 27 October 0:20:04 UTC 2017

Middle aged boss to flunky on last day of his internship: Hey, Chris, it'll be a shame to see you go… So tell me, is your name short for Christian or Christopher?
Flunky: My name's Craig. Public Sector Commission
Perth
Australia [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sea otter returned to wild after acid poisoning, road trip to Coachella [Spiffy]

Friday 27 October 0:20:04 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Psh, Like That's Hard to Get

Friday 27 October 0:20:03 UTC 2017

Only female worker in office, to five males: Speaking of Hummers…
(everyone stops working and looks up)
Technician: You have our attention. Malvern, Pennsylvania Overheard by: Were we? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this melee [Photoshop]

Friday 27 October 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Archive

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