John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Trump: I would give myself 10/10 for Puerto Rico response [Facepalm]

Thursday 19 October 23:49:56 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [94 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Sir, that's a $40 surcharge" [Repeat]

Thursday 19 October 23:17:58 UTC 2017

Repeat [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guy nabbed at airport trying to make Americium great again [Scary]

Thursday 19 October 23:06:17 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police department defends Officer who lied about warning suspect before shooting him. Apparently, thinking something is the same as doing something if you have a badge [Fail]

Thursday 19 October 22:59:40 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: How are you preparing for Halloween? Have your party treats planned out or are you looking for tips on goodies to make and take? Link goes to a festive drink since Farkers are notoriously bad at finding ways to booze it up [Interest

Thursday 19 October 21:00:00 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [98 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these bees [Photoshop]

Thursday 19 October 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » D’oh!

Thursday 19 October 19:00:00 UTC 2017

In a 2005 story about The Simpsons, San Francisco Chronicle writer Steve Rubenstein mentioned that in a dream Homer once “wrote that 1782 to the 12th power plus 1841 to the 12th power equals 1922 to the 12th power.” Rubenstein added, “(It does.)” Well, it doesn’t — the first factor here must be even, and the second must be odd, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What do you get when you cross a Ewok with Gallagher? This guy [Dumbass]

Thursday 19 October 16:20:05 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man mistakes Ken Griffey, Jr. for a Civil War general [Strange]

Thursday 19 October 15:33:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Tinder is reinforcing ancient mating habits…like the 2am booty calls behind the Gas-N-Sip [Interesting]

Thursday 19 October 15:20:04 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [97 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You know things are farked up when the Washington Post does a feature on fallout shelters that are still in existence and have remained pristine for half a century [Scary]

Thursday 19 October 14:50:05 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some dumbass who got defeated by a Rust Monster wants to tell you all about how D&D changed the way he views his life [Stupid]

Thursday 19 October 14:17:11 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [84 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Is world's oldest tortoise GAY? Not that there's anything wrong with that [Awkward]

Thursday 19 October 13:50:04 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [54 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Growing Up Skipper

Thursday 19 October 13:30:13 UTC 2017

In the Barbie family, Skipper is Barbie's younger sister. The 1975 version of her included the unusual feature that moving her arm caused her to experience "plastic puberty" (as one reporter put it). From wikipedia:

In 1975 Growing Up Skipper was released. The gimmick of the doll, which led to much controversy in the newspapers, was that if Skipper's arm … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Just because you can, doesn't mean that you should. Case in point, the 17-string guitar [Strange]

Thursday 19 October 13:20:05 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [178 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these wine connoisseurs [Photoshop]

Thursday 19 October 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NY Police: No, we can't tell you how much we took in civil asset forfeiture, as our database fell down the stairs by accident and injured itself. Judge: Fark You [Scary]

Thursday 19 October 12:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [151 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Spain to trigger direct rule on Catalonia to crush independence rebels [News]

Thursday 19 October 12:42:44 UTC 2017

News [link] [116 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » McCain wants answers about Niger, oh and a strategy, or a plan, or some reason why men had to die would be nice, too [News]

Thursday 19 October 12:35:41 UTC 2017

News [link] [203 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today's question for those who felt we shouldn't rebuild New Orleans because it was flood prone: Should we allow people to build homes in areas prone to wildfires? [Awkward]

Thursday 19 October 12:22:00 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [167 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Microbrewery offers to exchange tickets to Alt-Right Richard Spencer's speech in Gainesville for free beer, so of course they've received death threats [Followup]

Thursday 19 October 11:15:57 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [190 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » People in one neighborhood come together to raise an orphaned deer. Up until the day wildlife agents shoot it because it lost its fear of humans [Asinine]

Thursday 19 October 10:22:56 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [97 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That's what Xi said [Interesting]

Thursday 19 October 9:26:56 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [73 comments] [Link]

<title>Weird Universe » Home on Wheels

Thursday 19 October 9:11:00 UTC 2017

Dora Bryan was certainly somewhat homely for a famous actress, with a female assistant prettier than herself. And surely anyone who names their parakeet "Cecil Gibson" must've been a few caravans shy of a trailer park. [Link]

GraphJam » The World Is More Dangerous Than I Thought!

Thursday 19 October 8:59:55 UTC 2017

Portal traffic signs war of the worlds - 4877710848 Graph by: Vanos_Ira Tagged: Portal , traffic signs , war of the worlds Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » With Your Flavors Combined

Thursday 19 October 8:59:53 UTC 2017

awesome blt captain planet convergence flow chart infographic mmm bacon - 4468966912 Graph by: (via fuckyeahalbuquerque.tumblr.com) Tagged: awesome , blt , captain planet , convergence , flow chart , infographic , mmm bacon Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Finding the Warm Spot Shouldn't Be Like Cracking a Safe

Thursday 19 October 8:59:52 UTC 2017

best of week cold hot shower - 5720070144 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , cold , hot , shower Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » At Least It's an Excuse to Drink Heavily

Thursday 19 October 8:59:51 UTC 2017

Pie Chart relaxation stress time vacation work - 6324054528 Graph by: (via Happy Place) Tagged: Pie Chart , relaxation , stress , time , vacation , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Putting That BS To Use

Thursday 19 October 8:59:47 UTC 2017

astronomer bachelor of science BS college graduate Pie Chart ufo - 4475730176 Graph by: Aubie2 Tagged: astronomer , bachelor of science , BS , college , graduate , Pie Chart , ufo Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » If You Actually Used This Flowchart Then Probably

Thursday 19 October 8:59:44 UTC 2017

flowchart geek glasses nerdy - 6568105984 Graph by: (via Bite) Tagged: flowchart , geek , glasses , nerdy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Math Dance

Thursday 19 October 8:59:43 UTC 2017

best of week dance math moves - 6321270784 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , dance , math , moves Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Movie Franchise Lexicon: Remake or Reboot or Reimagination or Retcon?

Thursday 19 October 8:59:42 UTC 2017

movies language infographic - 7889018112 Submitted by: (via empire online) Tagged: movies , language , infographic Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » OMG Say Something Hot!

Thursday 19 October 8:59:41 UTC 2017

accents england english girls internet Pie Chart - 4903961088 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: accents , england , english , girls , internet , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Be Careful What You Major In…

Thursday 19 October 8:59:40 UTC 2017

liberal arts school major engineering graduation Line Graph - 6696089344 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: liberal arts , school , major , engineering , graduation , Line Graph Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Still Good for a Good Time

Thursday 19 October 8:59:39 UTC 2017

john green nerdfighters venn diagram youtube - 4923598336 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: john green , nerdfighters , venn diagram , youtube Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How I Spend My Time in Zelda

Thursday 19 October 8:59:38 UTC 2017

slow zora zelda - 7162346752 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: slow , zora , zelda Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Make Sure You Follow Through

Thursday 19 October 8:59:36 UTC 2017

golf graphs line graphs funny putting - 4479110144 Graph by: Saanengoatgirl Tagged: golf , graphs , line graphs , funny , putting Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Not a Lot

Thursday 19 October 8:59:33 UTC 2017

commercials klondike bar Pie Chart what would you do - 4829012480 Graph by: accountname0 Tagged: commercials , klondike bar , Pie Chart , what would you do Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Likability Of People Who Use the Word "Like"

Thursday 19 October 8:59:31 UTC 2017

always annoying day friend hour like normal teens word - 2203996928 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: always , annoying , day , friend , hour , like , normal , teens , word Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » But Harry Is Always Younger

Thursday 19 October 8:59:30 UTC 2017

cedric diggory edward cullen equation Harry Potter logic math voldemort - 4260244224 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cedric diggory , edward cullen , equation , Harry Potter , logic , math , voldemort Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Where's a 1-Up When I Need One

Thursday 19 October 8:59:29 UTC 2017

mario Pie Chart video games - 5383795456 Get Over Here and Play a Video Game Graph by: Deadhead2393 Tagged: mario , Pie Chart , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What People Think About "What People Think About"

Thursday 19 October 8:59:28 UTC 2017

best of week parody what people think who cares - 5848993024 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , parody , what people think , who cares Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What Proactiv Gets Rid Of

Thursday 19 October 8:59:22 UTC 2017

acne money Pie Chart proactiv - 2538440704 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: acne , money , Pie Chart , proactiv Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » And Let Us Not Forget the "I've Never Eaten Here But…" Review

Thursday 19 October 8:59:21 UTC 2017

review restaurant yelp Pie Chart - 6889204736 Graph by: teverton Tagged: review , restaurant , yelp , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Mario Gets His Revenge

Thursday 19 October 8:59:18 UTC 2017

mario nintendo pokey video games - 6544366848 Graph by: (via Bite) Tagged: mario , nintendo , pokey , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Great, Now the Whole Class Knows

Thursday 19 October 8:59:17 UTC 2017

failing Pie Chart progress report school teacher - 4245178112 Graph by: TFace Tagged: failing , Pie Chart , progress report , school , teacher Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Susan Glenn Always Comes Out on Top

Thursday 19 October 8:59:16 UTC 2017

axe infatuation infographic Memes secret ad Susan Glenn - 6284826880 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: axe , infatuation , infographic , Memes , secret ad , Susan Glenn Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Burgers by Location

Thursday 19 October 8:59:13 UTC 2017

amusement park burgers county fair fancy fast food food gas station good homemade junk food tasty - 2244895488 Graph by: fdvce Tagged: amusement park , burgers , county fair , fancy , fast food , food , gas station , good , homemade , junk food , tasty Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Coffee Awesomeness

Thursday 19 October 8:59:12 UTC 2017

coffee cold delicious drinks gross hot tastes temperature - 3692591616 Coffee Awesomeness Graph by: DarylM Tagged: coffee , cold , delicious , drinks , gross , hot , tastes , temperature Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What Base Have You Made It To?

Thursday 19 October 8:59:11 UTC 2017

girlfriend hot Pie Chart relationships - 5762286336 Graph by: LongArmProductions Tagged: girlfriend , hot , Pie Chart , relationships Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Oh, Play That One Song!

Thursday 19 October 8:59:10 UTC 2017

chopsticks Music piano Pie Chart - 5946593280 Graph by: CatLolzLover Tagged: chopsticks , Music , piano , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Should See What Happens When I Mess Up That Last Bird

Thursday 19 October 8:59:09 UTC 2017

angry birds apps games iphone Pie Chart - 4567866112 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: angry birds , apps , games , iphone , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Important Difference Between Correlation and Causation

Thursday 19 October 8:59:07 UTC 2017

best of week - 5558249216 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Plot Is For…Real Films

Thursday 19 October 8:59:06 UTC 2017

action Michael Bay movies Pie Chart - 4970454016 Graph by: cdm1138 Tagged: action , Michael Bay , movies , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's still too soon for somebody in Las Vegas to set up a Halloween display featuring 58 headstones and the hashtag #vegasstrong [Facepalm]

Thursday 19 October 8:58:56 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Efficiency

Thursday 19 October 6:00:25 UTC 2017

Benjamin Franklin and Sir Francis Dashwood once set out to shorten the Book of Common Prayer. Noel Perrin writes in Dr. Bowdler’s Legacy: Franklin and Dashwood had made contact while each was a postmaster general, and found themselves agreeing that the great trouble with church services is that they are too long. They then put out their anonymous Abridgement of … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Every teeny tiny itsy-bitsy little bit of separation is a step in the right direction. We're so proud of you… New Mexico? [Hero]

Thursday 19 October 5:53:17 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [79 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 🤢 [Weird]

Thursday 19 October 4:56:28 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [99 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 650: "Let There Be Light". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 19 October 4:01:00 UTC 2017

Farktography [link] [86 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New study finds that three-quarters of flying insects have vanished during the last 25 years. Hmm. Maybe they just flew somewhere else [Scary]

Thursday 19 October 3:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [100 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Thieves on surveillance video hug in celebration after car-break-ins [Strange]

Thursday 19 October 2:50:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Long time Farker published a sci-fi novel. To quote Jay Sherman from The Critic, "Buy my book Buy my Book" [Plug]

Thursday 19 October 2:34:42 UTC 2017

Plug [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This is EXACTLY what your day needs: the mental image of a bunch of 60-something retirees jogging naked around the trailer park [Florida]

Thursday 19 October 2:16:23 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Tower, this is Air Berlin requesting a flyby." "Negative, Air Berlin, the pattern is full" [Dumbass]

Thursday 19 October 1:41:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently not a drive-thru ATM [Dumbass]

Thursday 19 October 1:10:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three little pigs found running loose amid reports that someone blew their houses down [Strange]

Thursday 19 October 0:59:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Florida Brewery brews clever plot of trading in your admission tickets for free beer to thwart white nationalist Richard Spencer's speaking event. BRILLIANT [Florida]

Thursday 19 October 0:47:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [84 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Dammit, are you the one responsible for putting this crossing guard in my way?" [Facepalm]

Thursday 19 October 0:24:06 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pastoral setting [Photoshop]

Thursday 19 October 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [22 comments] [Link]

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