John Gordon Ross

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Beating off is sexual battery? [Strange]

Friday 8 September 23:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Mom refuses to evacuate her five kids because, when they moved to FL, they "knew that hurricanes were just part of the deal." Mmmmm, Coral Gables, ten miles inland with 13-foot elevation? Possible Cat-5 hurricane? Amateur Floridian, I see [Fl

Friday 8 September 23:05:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » When you have to announce that you weren't defeated by an 11-year-old girl, it's pretty clear that you were defeated by an 11-year-old girl [Followup]

Friday 8 September 22:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » So what if the Russians bought $100k worth of Facebook ads to boost Trump? It's not like those ads reached 70 million people or anything [Followup]

Friday 8 September 22:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Longtime Farker timujin has passed away [Sad]

Friday 8 September 20:59:46 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Plane full of cats and dogs displaced by Harvey flown from Texas to San Diego. Your dog wants an upgrade (with many awww pics) [Sappy]

Friday 8 September 20:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this race car [Photoshop]

Friday 8 September 20:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » What's worse than having to flee Hurricane Irma and spending close to $1,000 for a flight home from your college? Getting stuck in a smelly New Jersey rail yard because you fell asleep [Scary]

Friday 8 September 19:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Australians turn in 26,000 guns during amnesty campaign. Americans ask if that's one guy, one family or in one small town [Strange]

Friday 8 September 18:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Equifax has signed up everyone affected by their recent breach for complimentary monitoring through their TrustedID service. In unrelated news, this morning Equifax changed the EULA for TrustedID to say that users can't sue or join a class action

Friday 8 September 18:43:19 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Meet Harvey and Irma Schluter. Married 75 years and astonished to share their names with back-to-back hurricanes [Sappy]

Friday 8 September 18:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Headline: "Your cellphone porn habit isn't as secret as you thought." Wait…why did this show up under "Recommended for you"? [Interesting]

Friday 8 September 17:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » FEMA could run out of cash this weekend, which means your relatives in Florida may be moving back in with you permanently [Murica]

Friday 8 September 17:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Mom wears T-Rex costume to walk daughter to kindergarten bus stop on first day of school. "Ferrell said she has a few life-size dinosaur costumes lying around the house" [Amusing]

Friday 8 September 16:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Seattle favorite Dick's announces new location. So if you're in the area and you want a hot bag of Dick's, here you go [Cool]

Friday 8 September 16:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Jose can you see another category-4 hurricane? [Scary]

Friday 8 September 16:02:23 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Rush Limbaugh to evacuate Florida home after calling Hurricane Irma and climate change a ploy to sell ad time on the liberal media [Ironic]

Friday 8 September 16:02:23 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Best photo of bathroom full of flamingos you'll see outside Vegas [Misc]

Friday 8 September 15:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » People are buying these so-called 'micro' pigs not realizing what 'small' means in the pig world [Facepalm]

Friday 8 September 15:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Remember that airport on Saint Martin that's approach required Jumbo jets to fly a few dozen feet over the heads of bathers at a popular beach? After Irma, it's not there anymore. The airport OR the beach [Scary]

Friday 8 September 14:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Since it's obviously a slow news day, let's learn about the mysterious 'Pittsburgh Potty' [Interesting]

Friday 8 September 14:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » DOT Engineer: I will post electronic speed limit signs and make traffic change speed on my command. Drivers: What's a speed limit? [Obvious]

Friday 8 September 13:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Confederate statue cannonball thief caught on video [Followup]

Friday 8 September 13:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this tennis racket and player [Photoshop]

Friday 8 September 13:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Hurricane Irma's noodly appendages are poised to make landfall, Florida and Georgia in its wake. Gas and water are in short supply as residents flee to safety or hunker down in their homes. It's your Hurricane Irma Discussion Thread. Be safe

Friday 8 September 12:59:18 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Ham radio operators have already activated the Hurricane Watch Net. If you don't have a shortwave receiver, you can click the link to the left for live streaming audio [Florida]

Friday 8 September 12:50:04 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » Mystery Gadget 52

Friday 8 September 12:30:00 UTC 2017

Maybe this one is too easy? Purpose of this office machine?

The answer is here.

And after the jump. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Plastic surgery addict left with permanent erection after botched nose job. If the picture is any indication, he's in real trouble [Weird]

Friday 8 September 12:10:24 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Weather-weary nation not surprised by forecast of blood storms [Satire]

Friday 8 September 11:59:08 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » Get Lauren

Friday 8 September 11:39:00 UTC 2017

Artist Lauren McCarthy is renting herself out for three days at a time as a 'virtual assistant' like Siri, Alexa, or Google Now. From her website:

LAUREN is a human intelligent smart home. Lauren will visit your home, deploy a series of smart devices, and watch over you remotely 24/7. Lauren will control your home for you, attempting to be … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Equifax has set up a website to check to see if you're one of the 144 million people who had their entire identity leaked on the internet due to Equifax sucking at cybersecurity [PSA]

Friday 8 September 11:21:09 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » *cries* [Sad]

Friday 8 September 11:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Is there anything millennials can't ruin? Look what they made Le Creuset cookware do [Facepalm]

Friday 8 September 10:56:38 UTC 2017

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GraphJam » That's Why I Sleep at Work

Friday 8 September 9:56:53 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: sick , sickness , sleep , story of my life , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » An Episode of House

Friday 8 September 9:56:51 UTC 2017

Graph by: yubbles09 Tagged: diagnosis , die , episode , hospital , House MD , patient , TV Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Classic: Very Funny, Guys

Friday 8 September 9:56:48 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: hacked facebook , friends , gay , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Ugh, Is This Another "Call Me Maybe" Joke?

Friday 8 September 9:56:47 UTC 2017

Graph by: (via Bite) Tagged: call me maybe , maybe , maybelline , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Link Your Twitter Account And Cheezburger Account

Friday 8 September 9:56:46 UTC 2017

Submitted by: Unknown Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Locks

Friday 8 September 9:56:45 UTC 2017

Locks Graph by: Unknown Tagged: burglars , families , locks , people , security Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » According to my wife…

Friday 8 September 9:56:44 UTC 2017

LoL by: Unknown Tagged: husband , marriage , relationships , wife Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Find This Upsetting

Friday 8 September 9:56:43 UTC 2017

Graph by: tehvenezuelan Tagged: anger , Bar Graph , best of week , effort , feels , happy Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Getting a Costume together for the new Star Trek Movie release

Friday 8 September 9:56:42 UTC 2017

Graph by: 626ish Tagged: cheap , costume , ebay , fast , iron-on , mom , movies , perfect , premiere , Star Trek Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Success is…

Friday 8 September 9:56:41 UTC 2017

Graph by: Red15nukes Tagged: age , friends , Line Graph , money , old , pants , peeing , sex , success , teen , young Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Understanding of Graphs

Friday 8 September 9:56:40 UTC 2017

LoL by: ToxicShockTaco Tagged: education , elementary school , experts , graphs , high school , middle school , reading , understanding Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Everyone Has to See My Fabulous Taste

Friday 8 September 9:56:39 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: books , kindle , Pie Chart , pretentious , reading Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Let Them Play Around You

Friday 8 September 9:56:38 UTC 2017

I'm pretty sure they wont notice the difference so long as you flail your arm at them every once in a while. Graph by: Unknown Tagged: kids , laying on the floor , Pie Chart , playing , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » This Could Also Be The Heat Map for Good Cheese

Friday 8 September 9:56:36 UTC 2017

Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: lactose intolerant , heat map , dairy , lactase Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I'm Never Going to Get a Message Back From Batman

Friday 8 September 9:56:35 UTC 2017

Graph by: Ebony Tagged: batman , phones , Pie Chart , texting Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Why Didn't I Think of That Before?

Friday 8 September 9:56:34 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: pie charts , arguments , graphs , funny Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » sh*t I'll Get Fired For

Friday 8 September 9:56:33 UTC 2017

Graph by: Scarlet_letterman84 Tagged: deals , fired , policy , sarcasm , stealing , truth , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Are Smart, Me Swears

Friday 8 September 9:56:31 UTC 2017

Graph by: sauvignonblanca Tagged: Bar Graph , grammar , interviews , jobs , life , nervousness Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » How My Cat Reacts to…

Friday 8 September 9:56:30 UTC 2017

Graph by: Larii Tagged: cat , christmas , favorite , fun , interesting , new , reacts , sweet , toy , tree Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Replotted: And Now I Forgot Why I Got on the Internet in the First Place

Friday 8 September 9:56:29 UTC 2017

Graph by: Warplexion Tagged: interwebs , Pie Chart , replotted , unproductive , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Noises from my office building's toilet stalls

Friday 8 September 9:56:27 UTC 2017

Graph by: Brown Tagged: blackberry , flush , keys , noises , Office , rude , stalls , toilet , toilet paper , work Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Heat of Toast – What I'm doing with the Toast

Friday 8 September 9:56:26 UTC 2017

Graph by: Suzu Tagged: bread , burn , butter , Heat , melt , toast , toaster Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Unidentified Flying Weather Baloon

Friday 8 September 9:56:24 UTC 2017

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: aircraft , batman , identification , swamp gas , weather balloon Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Me Gusta los Dishes

Friday 8 September 9:56:23 UTC 2017

Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: chores , dishes , me gusta , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Eating Isn't Productive?

Friday 8 September 9:56:21 UTC 2017

Graph by: brandinosaur Tagged: bored , eat , Pie Chart , productive Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Non Capisco Italiano

Friday 8 September 9:56:20 UTC 2017

Graph by: Pas_Qual Tagged: comments , english , italian , no comprende , Pie Chart , youtube Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » She Never Lets Me Finish

Friday 8 September 9:56:19 UTC 2017

Graph by: morganmcmurtrie Tagged: graphs , mom , funny , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » What Driver's Education Consists Of

Friday 8 September 9:56:18 UTC 2017

Graph by: fourtwosevenmela Tagged: driving , education , school , shock value , value Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Reality of Putting On Eyeliner

Friday 8 September 9:56:17 UTC 2017

Submitted by: Unknown Tagged: fashion , Chart , eyeliner , makeup Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Perfect Amount of Time to Forget About Them

Friday 8 September 9:56:16 UTC 2017

Graph by: X8_Bliss Tagged: banana , food , fruit , Line Graph , ripe Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Just Add Bacon… to Anything

Friday 8 September 9:56:15 UTC 2017

Graph by: Micd00gs Tagged: bacon , profit Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Don't Like My Soulful Lyric Statuses, Mom

Friday 8 September 9:56:14 UTC 2017

Graph by: muench Tagged: facebook , flow chart , friend request , parents Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » No Gratification Without Separation

Friday 8 September 9:56:13 UTC 2017

Graph by: gb1333 Tagged: fun , Party , separation , tea , tea party , terrible , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Cheez in the Microwavez

Friday 8 September 9:56:12 UTC 2017

LoL by: ThingsIFindFunny Tagged: cheez , food , microwaves Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » That Means It's a Race, Right?

Friday 8 September 9:56:11 UTC 2017

Graph by: BobPowes Tagged: Pie Chart , running , jogging , gym class , school , race Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » So Like, Modeling My Life After Paris Hilton Was, Like, a Bad Thing?

Friday 8 September 9:56:10 UTC 2017

Graph by: kelleysbreakroom Tagged: arrogance , like , paris hilton Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Most of Them Don't Have to Be Cooked!

Friday 8 September 9:56:09 UTC 2017

Raw beetle is the best beetle. Graph by: xiaojer Tagged: bear grylls , man vs wild , Pie Chart , protein Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Value of the Home Cooked Meal over Time

Friday 8 September 9:56:05 UTC 2017

Graph by: TrustyMadison Tagged: college , cooked , elementary school , food , high school , home , marriage , meals , time , value Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Awwwww … welcome to the negative Internet. You'll get over it [Interesting]

Friday 8 September 9:16:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Night food, outside beer, underwear drunkenness and other foreign concepts that don't exist in English [Spiffy]

Friday 8 September 8:19:59 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » Straight Business

Friday 8 September 8:17:37 UTC 2017

In 2014 I described the Peaucellier–Lipkin linkage, a mechanism that transforms a rotary motion into a perfect straight-line motion: Image: Wikimedia Commons That linkage was invented in 1864 by French army engineer Charles-Nicolas Peaucellier. A decade later, Harry Hart invented two more. “Hart’s inversor” is a six-bar linkage — links of the same color are the same length. The fixed point … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Magnitude 8.2 earthquake hits off the coast of southern Mexico prompting a tsunami watch for Mexico, El Salvador, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Panama and Ecuador, because why not [NewsFlash]

Friday 8 September 7:10:33 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Oh, shiat [Florida]

Friday 8 September 6:39:23 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » High School football players learn that wearing hoods, burning a cross, and waving a rifle are not ways to increase your chances of starting in Friday's game. At least not in Iowa [Stupid]

Friday 8 September 5:56:17 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » In 2017, war was beginning. You have no chance to survive, make your time [News]

Friday 8 September 4:06:24 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Well, at least it is orderly, and no one has panicked and called this a Sharknado, or Gatorcane. Wait, this just in: "This is a nuclear hurricane" [Misc]

Friday 8 September 3:21:35 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Fish in Minnesota lake have developed a taste for human flesh [Scary]

Friday 8 September 3:14:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man arrested for impersonating Jack Ryan. To be fair, that's not the worst of his increasingly implausible plot lines [Facepalm]

Friday 8 September 2:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Shoot Out at the Taco Bell [Scary]

Friday 8 September 2:49:37 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Churches in Texas that pay no taxes are suing FEMA demanding federal funds for recovery [Asinine]

Friday 8 September 2:40:47 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » It's official. Irma is taking her talents to South Beach [Scary]

Friday 8 September 1:28:50 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » One brave human is going to stay and tend to the 55 Hemingway cats that wander about Key West's Hemingway House [Sappy]

Friday 8 September 1:19:03 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » WeHo Sheriff's apprehend 7-Eleven's axe-wielding shoplifter suspect. With link to "Oh My God" surprise attack security footage #DontGetInvolved [Followup]

Friday 8 September 1:14:37 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Miyazaki officials apologize for bringing deadly tick to news conference to illustrate danger of tick-borne disease, then letting it escape. "Prefectural government officials conducted a search for the insect with the help of reporters" [Face

Friday 8 September 1:01:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » With no other news going on, Sky News decides to answer the hard hitting questions, like 'Where's the most expensive place in England to get a pint?' In related story, Drew cancels flight to Surrey [PSA]

Friday 8 September 0:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pointed drop [Photoshop]

Friday 8 September 0:00:01 UTC 2017

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