Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » On the mean streets of Seattle, there can be only one way to clean up crime. And since this is Seattle, that way is 'send in more Starbucks' [Interesting]

Friday 4 August 23:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Woman dying of pancreatic cancer in VA: I'd really love a last mocha milkshake from my favorite restaurant. In Cleveland. Woman's friend, Restaurant Owner, and UPS: challenge accepted [Sappy]

Friday 4 August 23:31:16 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » We're not going to use those brand new Ford police interceptor SUVs, until we ensure that they're safe. Because, one of our officers smelled carbon monoxide. Ya know, that odorless and tasteless gas [Facepalm]

Friday 4 August 22:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man dumps body in horrendous act, then gets horrendous food at Applebee's [Scary]

Friday 4 August 22:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » CCTV footage clears USC student, 20, of rape after it showed the girl, 19, who claimed she was too drunk to consent being the aggressor, kissing him, making sexual gestures and leading him to her room [Facepalm]

Friday 4 August 21:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Canadian Catholic snowflakes outraged by demonic giant robot spider climbing all over their cathedral [Amusing]

Friday 4 August 21:19:48 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Good news: Man released two years ago after serving 30 years for two murders he did not commit. Better: Alabama Senate committee unanimously approves $1.5 million compensation. Bad: full Senate fails to approve payout before going on vacation [Stupid

Friday 4 August 20:50:04 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » Overtime

Friday 4 August 20:22:17 UTC 2017

By 1804, English engineer George Cayley was building model gliders that were remarkably similar to modern airplanes, with fixed wings, a body, and a tail. In the 1840s he built a glider large enough to carry a 10-year-old boy, and in 1853 he launched his coachman, John Appleby, across a valley on the first heavier-than-air flight by an adult. When … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Aliens may be deterring nocturnal pollinators. With helpful picture of possible alien spacecraft [Interesting]

Friday 4 August 20:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these fireworks [Photoshop]

Friday 4 August 20:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Syria prepares for 72 hour ceasefire. Oh, wait, sorry. Baltimore prepares for 72 hour ceasefire [Sad]

Friday 4 August 19:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Tanker truck goes over bridge and POOP THREAD! [Sick]

Friday 4 August 19:45:00 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » It's like a year's worth of "after school specials" about bad life choices crammed into a single headline: "Principal-turned-stripper gets 32 years for killing cop in DUI" [Fail]

Friday 4 August 19:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Pharma Bro guilty of 2 counts securities fraud, 1 count conspiracy to commit securities fraud, and 1 count of having an incredibly punchable face [NewsFlash]

Friday 4 August 19:15:28 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » The DEVAST8 tattoo guy decides not to remove any more of the tattoo because he now has a job as a "chicken chaser" and "the chickens don't care about my face" [Followup]

Friday 4 August 18:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » You mean that it's not okay to drag your wheelchair-bound friend behind your car? [Fail]

Friday 4 August 18:20:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Woman moves into apartment that had previously been rented to tenant with same last name. Hilarity ensues [Interesting]

Friday 4 August 17:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Comedian: "What, you're gonna heckle me? I don't go to where you work, jump up and down on the beds and slap the Funyons out of your . . . Funyons. Oh my god I want Funyons right now. Where am I again?" [Amusing]

Friday 4 August 17:20:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man charged in third murder says he has a hard time being rejected [Florida]

Friday 4 August 16:50:05 UTC 2017

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The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » Tiny arms

Friday 4 August 16:31:33 UTC 2017

Tiny arms View [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Study shows your first name may change your physical and perceived appearance. This explains why Chads are such Chads [Interesting]

Friday 4 August 16:20:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Caption what Catwoman is saying to this cat [Caption]

Friday 4 August 16:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » The NYPD is threatening to boycott Dunkin' Donuts. Not everybody runs on Dunkin, apparently [Fail]

Friday 4 August 15:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Happy 227th Birthday to the United States Coast Guard. And while it's confusing for all the other Armed Services to read 14 U.S. Code 1, if they could read, they would have joined the Coast Guard [Murica]

Friday 4 August 14:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Trolls collectively hijack white power website discussion groups to have candid conversations about color swatches [Amusing]

Friday 4 August 13:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » First of all, don't sexually abuse kids. Also, don't text people about it about if you do. And if you do text people about it, don't do it in a supersized font. On an airplane. In front of the woman who's taking pictures of your scree

Friday 4 August 13:20:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this PC user [Photoshop]

Friday 4 August 13:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » After learning a student had been bullied by his classmates and dreaded his return to school, a group of over 50 bikers gave him a special escort to his first day of 6th grade [Hero]

Friday 4 August 12:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Seattle's air quality is worse than Beijing [Amusing]

Friday 4 August 12:19:33 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » Zippo Car

Friday 4 August 11:57:49 UTC 2017

The Zippo Manufacturing Co. built the Zippo car in 1947 by adapting a Chrysler Saratoga. However, the weight of the lighters kept causing the tires to blow out. So in 1952 the car was sent to a Pittsburgh garage for repairs and re-adaptation. It was never seen again. To this day, no one knows what happened to the Zippo car. … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teenage joker's wave of social media pranks curtailed after he's hauled in by COBRA, because Knowing is half the battle [Dumbass]

Friday 4 August 11:01:32 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Sewage sprayed on luggage of 380 passengers in Nashville Airport. Hope you had clean underwear in your carry on [Sick]

Friday 4 August 7:26:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » An incident involving a red-haired girl and a cucumber escalates into assault on a police officer [Sad]

Friday 4 August 4:38:06 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » If you're going to steal 7-Eleven hot dogs that have been rolling for a week, don't post the video on social media [Florida]

Friday 4 August 3:20:35 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Christians are nearly twice as likely to think people are poor because they don't work hard enough. You don't think Jesus just had heaven and earth handed to him by his dad, do you? [Repeat]

Friday 4 August 3:04:34 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » ♫ Start spreading the news / I'm leaving today / I want to be a part of it, New York, New York ♫ (not safe for work audio so keep the volume down) [Awkward]

Friday 4 August 3:03:08 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » For sale: Waterfront home. Quiet neighborhood in exclusive area [Florida]

Friday 4 August 2:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Drew Curtis says the rents in Newark, NJ are too damn high in the gentrifying city. Silent on the price of beer [Obvious]

Friday 4 August 2:42:27 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Do not have sex with a minor. If you have sex with a minor, do not secretly record it. If you secretly record it, do not share it with her best friend who will post it online. Also, do not have sex with a minor [Dumbass]

Friday 4 August 2:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Here's just how close that Air Canada jet came to slamming into four other planes [Followup]

Friday 4 August 2:13:33 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Protip for women (and some men): Never apply fake eyelashes without wearing your glasses, you might just be gluing a dead fly to your eye [Weird]

Friday 4 August 1:57:31 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Reefer madness strikes Dallas Area Rabid Transit [Scary]

Friday 4 August 1:50:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Noseless man who swam across river while high on meth pleads guilty to assaulting the police officer who rescued him. Why yes, this did happen in Saskatoon, how did you guess? [Asinine]

Friday 4 August 1:20:05 UTC 2017

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John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons