John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Airport sets aside parking spaces just for women: extra wide, painted pink, and each labeled with an image of a high heel shoe. Not surprisingly, some people have a problem with this [Facepalm]

Thursday 20 July 23:58:35 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Chilies? In MY vagina?" It's more likely than you think … if I catch you sleeping with my husband [Scary]

Thursday 20 July 23:15:12 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [105 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In D.C. for a robotics competition, 6 Burundians decide that returning to Burundi isn't really their thing [Obvious]

Thursday 20 July 22:50:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cleveland Browns' stadium may contain flammable panels similar to the ones used on the London apartment building that caught fire and killed many people. But on the bright side, how many people go to see a Browns game [Fail]

Thursday 20 July 22:20:08 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Naked gunman fired over 200 rounds in rare sail-by shooting [Murica]

Thursday 20 July 21:50:04 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Sampson told authorities she tried to set the house on fire to kill her girlfriend but denied threatening her girlfriend with a hunting knife" [Murica]

Thursday 20 July 21:20:10 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man mistakes cemetery for farmer's market. "They were already having a horrible day, and this just made it more tragic" [Scary]

Thursday 20 July 20:50:08 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Couple claim they can orgasm for up to 18 hours just from hugging. Little man in the boat unavailable for comment [Unlikely]

Thursday 20 July 20:20:09 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Misc

Thursday 20 July 20:07:00 UTC 2017

Conceptual artist Joseph Beuys accepted responsibility for any snow that fell in Düsseldorf February 15-20, 1969. Any three of the numbers {1, 22, 41, 58} add up to a perfect square. Nebraska is triply landlocked — a resident must cross three states to reach an ocean, gulf, or bay. The only temperature represented as a prime number in both Celsius … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this fashion trend [Photoshop]

Thursday 20 July 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two-year-old found crawling on the roof of its house. Maybe it was bitten by a radioactive spider. I mean, it could happen, right? [Sick]

Thursday 20 July 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cecil the Lion's son Xanda shot dead by trophy hunters two years after Minnesota dentist killed his father [Sad]

Thursday 20 July 19:20:11 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [146 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Juice is loose [NewsFlash]

Thursday 20 July 19:00:29 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [305 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man who sued to marry his computer which he watched porn on sues to stop display of gay pride flag [Fail]

Thursday 20 July 18:50:04 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [89 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » No matter how you cut it, people love stealing cheese [Obvious]

Thursday 20 July 18:20:08 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There are several reasons Trumpcare failed. Reason number one: Trump [Obvious]

Thursday 20 July 17:50:10 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NY to DC in 29 minutes — Elon Musk gets go-ahead for hyperloop [Cool]

Thursday 20 July 17:20:07 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [203 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Angry Florida man shoots out tires of AT&T trucks because they are parked too close to his home. Seems reasonable [Florida]

Thursday 20 July 16:50:08 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [111 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Husband set to join wife in prison for child sex crimes. Shouldn't the guards put a stop to that? [Sick]

Thursday 20 July 15:50:04 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The best part of waking up, is Viagra in your cup [Amusing]

Thursday 20 July 15:20:08 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mueller is expanding Russia probe to include Trump's business transactions. Trump to fire Mueller in 3…2…1 [News]

Thursday 20 July 14:54:58 UTC 2017

News [link] [623 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man with machete fights man with garbage can. Winner takes on the winner of the tire iron-vs.-bag of dog poo bracket, while it's a bye week for the guy with the gun [Obvious]

Thursday 20 July 14:50:09 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Plane makes unexpected landing in middle of moving traffic on Long Island road. "GET OFF THE ROAD, YA BUM" [Strange]

Thursday 20 July 14:20:10 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not to alarm anybody, but there is spider out there that looks like somebody sewed the head of bunny onto the body of a daddy longlegs [Creepy]

Thursday 20 July 13:50:10 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [119 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » French mayor of beach town forced to apologise for a rude plane banner that read "Go home f**king tourists" in English and Spanish [Amusing]

Thursday 20 July 13:20:10 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop theme: Aren't you the punny one? [Photoshop]

Thursday 20 July 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Student posts note on why she's protesting her elite school by pooping on school property because the teachers are sh*tty. Poop [Weird]

Thursday 20 July 12:50:09 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Toilet Tissue Illness

Thursday 20 July 12:42:53 UTC 2017

In the late 1920s and early 1930s, Scott Tissues ran an advertising campaign that sought to convince the American public that there was such a thing as 'Toilet Tissue Illness,' and that it was one of the great public health crises of the time. Toilet Tissue Illness was caused by using cheap toilet paper. It could lead to serious complications, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Americans' alcoholic beverage of choice is … Wait for it. BEER [Interesting]

Thursday 20 July 12:20:14 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Mystery Illustration 51

Thursday 20 July 9:28:00 UTC 2017

Which internationally famous best-selling singer of the 1970s is this supposed to be?

Answer is here.

And after the jump. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Released from the oppressive yoke of British rule 20 years ago, Hong Kong is now enjoying the freedom of living as part of China [Obvious]

Thursday 20 July 8:43:00 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Don't like the apology letter from your ex-girlfriend? Simple, just grade it and send it back [Amusing]

Thursday 20 July 6:28:06 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [132 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Lost Treasure

Thursday 20 July 6:03:55 UTC 2017

Robert Louis Stevenson’s original map of Treasure Island was lost during publication. He sent it to his editor and was “aghast” to learn that it was never received. “I had written it up to the map,” he wrote — most of the novel’s plot had been inspired by the picturesque map he had dreamed up at the start. Now he … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The 58-story Millennium Tower in San Francisco is sinking faster than ever. The top of the building is now leaning 14 inches towards the Sales Force Tower, having tilted another 2.5 inches in the first 6 months of 2017 [Scary]

Thursday 20 July 4:30:02 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [213 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 637: "Come and Sit with Me". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 20 July 4:01:00 UTC 2017

Farktography [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ugly-ass baby wombat born in Australian nature refuge [Creepy]

Thursday 20 July 3:50:14 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cop films himself planting evidence at crime scene (with video) [Asinine]

Thursday 20 July 3:40:18 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [221 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » We can't close our eyes to the plight of the city. Kids, are you noticing all this plight? [Facepalm]

Thursday 20 July 2:50:14 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I have no idea what you're talking about so here's Kyle MacLachlan making a "Twin Peaks" themed bento box on Japanese television [Weird]

Thursday 20 July 2:10:14 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » All I'm saying is, the point of a voodoo doll is kind of lost if you actually stick needles in the person themselves [Sick]

Thursday 20 July 1:30:14 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Former model pays to have four pints of fat injected into her buttocks for the Kim Kardashian look. Of course, if she really wants the whole package, she might consider having a few pints injected directly into her head [Dumbass]

Thursday 20 July 0:25:12 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man robs doughnut store twice in one week. Truly, there can be no cruller crime [Dumbass]

Thursday 20 July 0:10:14 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Airline passenger upset when two extra feet of legroom appear [Sick]

Thursday 20 July 0:06:25 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [95 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this egg cup holder [Photoshop]

Thursday 20 July 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [19 comments] [Link]

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