John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Texas sheriff blames Manchester attack on bad people. And by "bad people," he means the stupid politically correct British people who disarmed their citizens and let that guy in [Murica]

Wednesday 24 May 23:37:12 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [153 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » DOJ: Attorney General Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III did not disclose Russia meetings when applying for his security clearance [NewsFlash]

Wednesday 24 May 23:18:35 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [523 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fundraisers started for the homeless in Manchester who rushed to help the victims of the terror attack [Followup]

Wednesday 24 May 22:50:04 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » FIGHT…FIGHT…FIGHT…oh it's a teacher and an aide…Nothing to see here [Stupid]

Wednesday 24 May 21:50:05 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pro-Tip: 'I guess you're here about the opium,' should not be the first words out of your mouth when a sheriff knocks on your door [Fail]

Wednesday 24 May 21:20:06 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Grandma flees hit-and-run, causes second accident down the road, tells officers she drank half a pint of vodka, oh and those are her grandchildren in the back seat [Asinine]

Wednesday 24 May 20:50:05 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen [Cool]

Wednesday 24 May 20:20:05 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [129 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this woman from another time [Photoshop]

Wednesday 24 May 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New York businesses are providing Plan B to their employees to address commuter problems by aborting the drivers of the future [Obvious]

Wednesday 24 May 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If some stranger from the internet wants to buy your used iPhone for $450 but only has $500 in $100 bills and needs change, maybe look at the bills he's giving you before you give him the money and phone [Dumbass]

Wednesday 24 May 19:20:06 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Room 101

Wednesday 24 May 18:54:12 UTC 2017

In 1941, the BBC established an Eastern Services Committee to discuss programming in India. The meetings were held in Room 101 at 55 Portland Place in London. George Orwell attended at least 12 meetings there and was asked to convene a subcommittee to consider organizing drama and poetry competitions. Orwell scholar Peter Davison writes, “In Nineteen Eighty-Four O’Brien tells Orwell … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Move over China, India is number one in total human population now [Interesting]

Wednesday 24 May 18:50:05 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [108 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman knew something was fishy when her neighbor was hiding the founders of the Mormon Church in her garage [Amusing]

Wednesday 24 May 18:20:05 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three things are guaranteed to bring farkers together: cancer sucks, Dolly Parton is good and genuine and Mr. Rogers rocks. This link has one of those three [CSB]

Wednesday 24 May 17:50:05 UTC 2017

CSB [link] [94 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Best yearbook photo ever [Cool]

Wednesday 24 May 17:38:50 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [133 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia." -Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. Huh, maybe that's why everyone who reads my novel gets sick. THIS is your Fark Writer'

Wednesday 24 May 17:04:33 UTC 2017

CSB [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dude tries to escape police by looking like a lady, but ends up looking like Steven Tyler instead [Florida]

Wednesday 24 May 16:50:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NJ activates emergency alert system, sends nuclear warnings to TVs — by accident [Dumbass]

Wednesday 24 May 16:20:06 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman stopped trying to bring a live monkey into court in her purse. Includes helpful photo of an x-ray view of a monkey in a purse [Stupid]

Wednesday 24 May 15:50:04 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [89 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And Jesus said unto his disciples "Verily I say unto you, that a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven…unless you are offered a free Toyota Land Cruiser, then I say go for it" [Facepalm]

Wednesday 24 May 15:20:07 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [76 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sure, Trump may be an arrogant inexperienced blowhard bent on profiting from the presidency, but at least he "united the entire Muslim world" according to his administration [Unlikely]

Wednesday 24 May 14:50:09 UTC 2017

Unlikely [link] [163 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What is your best, one line advice? [Survey]

Wednesday 24 May 14:20:07 UTC 2017

Survey [link] [568 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Sologamy

Wednesday 24 May 14:08:09 UTC 2017

Sologamy = marrying yourself. Apparently it's a growing trend. A way to say yes to yourself. And there are various companies (such as here and here) that will help you do it.

I don't buy into all the talk about marrying yourself as a form of self-affirmation, but I think there is some logic to the idea that if you … [Link]

Overheard In The Office » The Sash and Tiara Are Just One Facet Of the Office

Wednesday 24 May 14:06:40 UTC 2017

Office drone on phone: There's a woman out there. Oh, that's not a woman, that's the governor. Providence, Rhode Island Overheard by: evelyn [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Porn and speed dating are the key to survival [Spiffy]

Wednesday 24 May 13:50:06 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Do do do do do do do do d oOOOH OH OH OH GOD YES YES YES NOKIA RINGTONE (page might be not safe for work) [Creepy]

Wednesday 24 May 13:20:07 UTC 2017

Creepy [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this simple coffeepot [Photoshop]

Wednesday 24 May 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man run over by tractor in LaGrange. Police want to know a-how how how how such a thing could happen [Weird]

Wednesday 24 May 12:50:05 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » At Buckingham Palace, the Changing of the Guard ceremony was cancelled over security concerns. So… those guys just have to stay out there then? [Weird]

Wednesday 24 May 12:15:20 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » United's PR is now on fire [Scary]

Wednesday 24 May 11:35:20 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some reporter just went to Walmart for the first time [Murica]

Wednesday 24 May 11:20:06 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [133 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Mystery Gadget 48

Wednesday 24 May 10:37:00 UTC 2017

What's going on here?

Answer at the link (scroll down).

And after the jump.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's not spam, it's not robocalls – it's ringless voicemail and the GOP's FCC wants to make it legal [Fail]

Wednesday 24 May 10:17:17 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [288 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Four hikers set new record by dying in Everest's highest camp [Sad]

Wednesday 24 May 9:20:17 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Visit beautiful Juneau, Alaska…. find random body parts [Scary]

Wednesday 24 May 8:42:16 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Stale french fries? That's a gas, gas, gas [Scary]

Wednesday 24 May 7:05:29 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "So to recap, a couple of white ladies learned to make burritos good while on vacation and now they are literally comparable to Hernán Cortés" [Facepalm]

Wednesday 24 May 4:45:38 UTC 2017

Facepalm [link] [443 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Truck plows into Delaware company AnalTech, releases odor …obviously [Scary]

Wednesday 24 May 3:55:32 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Firefighters rescue ducklings that were swept down a storm drain. And by 'ducklings', I mean big, burly construction workers [Spiffy]

Wednesday 24 May 2:50:04 UTC 2017

Spiffy [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There's a level of drunk and disorderly where the cops get called, and then there's the level where fighter jets are scrambled [Dumbass]

Wednesday 24 May 1:50:04 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two men with dreadlocks, one wearing a Jamaican beanie, are wanted for attempting to rob a marijuana dispensary [Obvious]

Wednesday 24 May 0:50:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman, 43, arrested for "passionately kissing" 14-year-old. And she's not even a teacher (with mugshot) [Florida]

Wednesday 24 May 0:27:50 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this peaking gator [Photoshop]

Wednesday 24 May 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

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