Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Anyone have a spare $56 million? You can buy Sting's Central Park West duplex. In other news, the AC on your 440-sq ft 1-bedroom basement apartment that you pay WAY too much for just went out…again [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 23:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Cancel that Amber Alert and whip up some murder charges against the little accomplice" [Dumbass]

Thursday 4 May 23:45:51 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Japan in short supply of ninjas [Weird]

Thursday 4 May 23:20:04 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » In a Word

Thursday 4 May 21:41:12 UTC 2017

alembicated
adj. over-refined, excessively subtle in thought or expression brachylogy
n. conciseness of speech; a condensed expression mycterism
n. a subtle or scornful jibe; a piece of sarcasm or irony; subtle mocking In 1886 Grover Cleveland suspended certain officials during a recess of the Senate and refused to give his reasons. When the Senate objected, he sent them a letter … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Climate change may wipe out all monuments to the confederacy [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 21:16:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Cheese is popular for many but what are some fun ways you use it? Special selections for your mac or the perfect complement for mushrooms? Share your favorite uses.. especially if they break from the ordinary [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 21:00:33 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Judge acquits woman who tried to water down bacon [Followup]

Thursday 4 May 20:40:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » You ever laugh so hard at a TV show you choked and knocked yourself unconscious? This Australian MP has [Amusing]

Thursday 4 May 20:14:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this ghostly presence [Photoshop]

Thursday 4 May 20:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » This Finals week, students at Montana State University can get themselves a piece of ass [Cool]

Thursday 4 May 19:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Of all the places you don't want to hide an error, a nuclear plant has got to be at the top of the list [Scary]

Thursday 4 May 19:16:44 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man charged with assault for attacking neighbor with bowling pin, wearing ridiculous-looking shoes [Amusing]

Thursday 4 May 18:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Obamacare flatlines [NewsFlash]

Thursday 4 May 18:44:36 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Man enters home, discharges fire extinquisher, prays with resident. Wait, what? [Strange]

Thursday 4 May 18:44:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Customs: Anything to declare? Man: Those aren't my sealed buckets full of snakes [Dumbass]

Thursday 4 May 18:20:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Guess what happens if you take a drug called "Gray Death" [Sad]

Thursday 4 May 18:03:42 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Minneapolis Park Board votes to change name of lake named after noted slaver John Calhoun to the original Dakota name of Bde Maka Ska, which translates loosely as "Whitey Lake" [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 17:41:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » North Korea now threatens the "final doom of the U.S." To which most people said we already had that last November [Followup]

Thursday 4 May 17:20:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Gunman shoots and kills sports bar employee, then gets killed by a customer because Texas [Murica]

Thursday 4 May 17:03:42 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Fake news in 'Star Wars' is probably their number one problem". Jar Jar Binks nods in approval [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 16:41:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » US Special Operations Command is on the lookout for performance enhancing drugs for dogs, raising the possibility of tactical milk-bones [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 16:20:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Delta sees all the free publicity that United is getting and says, "Yeah I wanna piece of that" [Facepalm]

Thursday 4 May 16:02:32 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » DC Comics is bringing The Watchmen to its universe, but unless you live in the USA, you won't be seeing any bloody smiles thanks to a trademark troll [Silly]

Thursday 4 May 15:44:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Woman swallows $7,000 in cash to hide it from her husband, suffers penalty for early withdrawal [Awkward]

Thursday 4 May 15:35:27 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » School on lockdown as police investigate Darth Vader threatening younglings again [Weird]

Thursday 4 May 15:31:57 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Parents Of The Year give daughter a vodak party for turning 13. She Absolutly blew a .32 [Fail]

Thursday 4 May 15:20:05 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » What part of "Don't go near the komodo dragons" don't you understand? [Scary]

Thursday 4 May 15:10:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Alanis Morissette is broke but happy after manager who had one hand in her pocket sentenced to 6 years in prison for theft [Ironic]

Thursday 4 May 14:50:04 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Group of bounty hunters who surrounded a car in a Walmart parking lot and shot up the vehicle, killing the innocent man, have been charged with murder. IG-88, Bossk, Zuckuss, 4-Lom, and Dengar insist they were set up by Boba Fett and claim innocence

Thursday 4 May 14:40:04 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » Destruct Therapy

Thursday 4 May 14:24:08 UTC 2017

The Stop Stress Group is a Spanish company founded by Jorge Arribas Haro in 2003. It offers stress management and team-building therapy to companies, and it specializes in "Destruct Therapy" (Destructoterapia), which involves giving office workers sledge hammers, taking them out to a junk yard, and having them vent their rage on "cars, washing machines, refrigerators, television sets, and so … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Biodegradable burial pod turns your body into a tree. Roger Williams nods approvingly [Sappy]

Thursday 4 May 14:11:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » It's the time of year when middle school students do stupid things in yearbook photos to piss people off [Dumbass]

Thursday 4 May 13:11:53 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Theme: Running with scissors [Photoshop]

Thursday 4 May 13:00:01 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Prince Philip is not on the cart after all; he's fine and thinks he'll go for a walk [Followup]

Thursday 4 May 12:10:18 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Students try to crawl through an air duct to steal a final exam from a teacher. Police say the suspects were a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal [Strange]

Thursday 4 May 12:08:27 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Live boy [Awkward]

Thursday 4 May 11:19:28 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » US Department of Justice says it was OK for police to continue shooting Alton Sterling because he was still moving [Facepalm]

Thursday 4 May 11:06:28 UTC 2017

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Weird Universe » The Rhino

Thursday 4 May 10:59:00 UTC 2017

More info here.

1954 coverage here.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ground beef [Scary]

Thursday 4 May 10:49:26 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Okay, so the terrorism angle didn't work. What else do we have to compel people to give up their passwords and erode the Fifth? An Instagram celeb, nudes, and a text reading "can have them back as I said you dope chick"? Fine, let's g

Thursday 4 May 10:37:27 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » "Alcoholic British Baby Boomers Overrunning NHS" is the name of my Godsmack tribute band [Silly]

Thursday 4 May 9:59:27 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Scientists now say it's okay to masturbate at work [Hero]

Thursday 4 May 9:48:26 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Terminally-ill cancer patient jailed for LEGAL cancer drug in her system, will miss chemotherapy. Kansas: The Heart(less) Land of America [Asinine]

Thursday 4 May 8:08:26 UTC 2017

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Futility Closet » Far From Home

Thursday 4 May 6:17:35 UTC 2017

You’d look forlorn too if you were the first zebra in England. The bewildered creature, known as “Queen Charlotte’s she-ass,” departed the Cape of Good Hope “Noah’s-ark fashion” with another zebra in 1762, but her companion died on the voyage. Installed at Buckingham Palace, she “was pestered with visits, and had all her hours employed from morning to night in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 626: "Gardens 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 4 May 4:01:00 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Dumb: Faking an injury to get a big payout from workers' compensation. Really dumb: Doing it in view of a security camera [Florida]

Thursday 4 May 3:59:58 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Today in "only works in the movies" news, police officer arrested after planning to fake his own death and flee to Mexico [Dumbass]

Thursday 4 May 1:46:45 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Still have some leftover Peeps from Easter? Behold the beauty that is Peepcorn [PSA]

Thursday 4 May 1:16:45 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Lawmakers outraged after being tricked into honoring KKK member. In all fairness, though, they were Tennessee lawmakers, so the "trickery" may have involved using two-syllable words and hiding the crayons [Dumbass]

Thursday 4 May 0:46:45 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » Ancient 'hamster' that outlived the dinosaurs found in Siberia. Wow, I didn't know they lived that long [Interesting]

Thursday 4 May 0:16:45 UTC 2017

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Fark.com RSS » U.S. airlines collected $4.2 billion in baggage fees last year, which comes to about 2.67 billion dead giant rabbits if you're United [Asinine]

John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons