John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » If you can get past the first sentence of this article without breaking a rib from laughing too hard, there's some shockingly shocking information that will shock you with shocking news about who actually profits from speed cameras [Obvious]

Tuesday 25 April 23:50:04 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman fired from job for a: Embezzling funds? B: Stealing sensitive data? or C: Not loving Jesus enough? [Asinine]

Tuesday 25 April 23:30:04 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [119 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » These Caterpillars Chow Down on Plastic Bags

Tuesday 25 April 23:30:00 UTC 2017

Scientists say wax worms may be a way to help dispose of non-biodegradable plastic waste. [Link]

Mental Floss » How Guglielmo Marconi Cheated Death—Twice

Tuesday 25 April 23:15:00 UTC 2017

It’s common knowledge that a lot of famous people went down with the Titanic—John Jacob Astor, Benjamin Guggenheim, and Isidor Straus, to name a few. Several notable men had tickets but chose not to board, including Milton Hershey, Henry Clay Frick, and J.P. Morgan. But only one man avoided maritime disaster not just once—but twice. Nobel Prize winner Guglielmo Marconi, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 300 pounds of illegal Nepalese yak meat seized at JFK … relatedly, Nepalese yak meat is apparently illegal [Strange]

Tuesday 25 April 23:10:04 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 1) Create YouTube channel; 2) Abuse your kids as "pranks"; 3) Profit 4a) Hire PR firm and apologize; 4b) Begin family counseling [Sick]

Tuesday 25 April 22:30:04 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [133 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Scientists Develop Germ-Fighting Fake Mucus

Tuesday 25 April 22:20:00 UTC 2017

“I am so excited about mucus,” said the lead researcher. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today is ANZAC day – so here's an American flag for you Kiwis, Aussies, and Poms honouring your heroes today [Hero]

Tuesday 25 April 22:10:04 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How Ella Fitzgerald's Career Began on a Dare

Tuesday 25 April 22:00:00 UTC 2017

The jazz legend was born 100 years ago today. [Link]

Mental Floss » Learn a Language While You Wait for People to Respond to Your Gchats

Tuesday 25 April 21:33:52 UTC 2017

An MIT project is trying to help people learn during brief moments of online waiting. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New restrictions added to Florida's medical marijuana law, adding a 90-day waiting period before a sick person can get pot they're not allowed to smoke, vape or eat [Florida]

Tuesday 25 April 20:50:04 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [88 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Barbie's got a bun in the oven. Ken demands paternity test. fb- quietly skulks away [Weird]

Tuesday 25 April 20:35:53 UTC 2017

Weird [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Here we go again: Federal judge blocks Trump's order denying funding to sanctuary cities [NewsFlash]

Tuesday 25 April 20:24:29 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [490 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Nordstrom is Selling Jeans Covered in Fake Dirt. They Cost $425.

Tuesday 25 April 20:21:35 UTC 2017

All the mess, none of the yard work. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Student finds earworm in school lunch. Not hears, finds [Sick]

Tuesday 25 April 20:11:53 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these high-flyers [Photoshop]

Tuesday 25 April 20:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 7 Expert-Approved Ways to Write a Better To-Do List

Tuesday 25 April 20:00:00 UTC 2017

It's time to ditch the old-school format. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fiery freeway pileup in Los Angeles leaves one dead, nearly a dozen injured and causes traffic chaos [NewsFlash]

Tuesday 25 April 19:54:34 UTC 2017

NewsFlash [link] [127 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Well, someone's Kentucky Derby celebration is going to be a little short on party favors [Awkward]

Tuesday 25 April 19:50:04 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police who removed United passenger: Coming right for us, furtive movements, fear for my life, etc [Murica]

Tuesday 25 April 19:40:05 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [135 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Central Florida town to fly Confederate flag at half-mast. I guess we need to send the army back down there [Florida]

Tuesday 25 April 19:20:05 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » While it's not technically illegal to have a sex dungeon in your attic across the street from a school, police really don't like to find teenagers in it [Sick]

Tuesday 25 April 19:10:04 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Scientists bring us one step closer to a future where humans are grown in bags [Cool]

Tuesday 25 April 18:50:04 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [80 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why no one respects science: "Being "pro-science" has become a bizarre cultural phenomenon in which liberals engage in public displays of self-reckoned intelligence as a kind of performance art, while demonstrating zero evidence to justif

Tuesday 25 April 18:38:55 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [366 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Walmart Unveils the ‘Crotilla,' a Tortilla And Croissant Hybrid

Tuesday 25 April 18:21:57 UTC 2017

If you’re confused about how to eat a combination of two foods that rarely appear on the same menu, Walmart has a few recommendations. [Link]

Mental Floss » Owner of Alleged 'Spite House' in London Allowed to Keep Her Paint Job

Tuesday 25 April 18:21:56 UTC 2017

The UK court ruled that the motive behind the pattern choice didn't matter. [Link]

Mental Floss » The Best Amazon Deals We Could Find Today, April 25

Tuesday 25 April 18:21:34 UTC 2017

From the Smart Shopping Team… [Link]

Weird Universe » 7 Clicks (April 24, 2017)

Tuesday 25 April 18:17:23 UTC 2017

7 Clicks
A Weird Universe News Service
April 24, 2017

Can't Possibly Be True: Backpacking white college kids frolicking in poor Asian countries–and begging locals to crowdfund them. [The Coverage (Malaysia)]

Nor This One: Ms. I. H. Spjut, a California restaurant server, born in 1998 with the birth name Isis Harambe Spjut. [Daily Dot]

U-S-A! U-S-A! District of Columbia officials, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Crime fighting robots may be coming to a mall near you. You have thirty seconds to put down that Cinnabon [Interesting]

Tuesday 25 April 18:14:55 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Wife's Fitbit logs steps after husband says she died [Awkward]

Tuesday 25 April 17:50:04 UTC 2017

Awkward [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Unroll.me Has Been Selling Your Email Data—Here’s How to Make it Stop

Tuesday 25 April 17:45:00 UTC 2017

You'll need to sort through your email settings to revoke the service's access to your data. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » US special forces end 6 year search for warlord Joseph Kony, who still remains at large. So be prepared for Kony 2017 reboot release this summer, with Kony 2023 and Kony 2030 also in the pipeline [Followup]

Tuesday 25 April 17:20:04 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Organization Lets You Pay the Water Bill for a Family in Need

Tuesday 25 April 17:15:00 UTC 2017

The Human Utility helps residents in Detroit and Baltimore who are facing plumbing shutoffs. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In the Spanish language version of T2 of course the terminator doesn't say "hasta la vista baby" [Obvious]

Tuesday 25 April 16:50:03 UTC 2017

Obvious [link] [76 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » So, how does China's first aircraft carrier stack up against other military powers? [Followup]

Tuesday 25 April 16:20:04 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [137 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Note to Americans: You can't just walk around Canada with a loaded gun. Sorry [Murica]

Tuesday 25 April 15:50:04 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [162 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bill O'Reilly: "I am sad that I'm not on television anymore" [Sad]

Tuesday 25 April 15:20:04 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [140 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Fascinating Facts About Ella Fitzgerald

Tuesday 25 April 14:58:49 UTC 2017

The First Lady of Song would have turned 100 today. [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: State Capitals

Tuesday 25 April 14:58:46 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » North Korea threatens to nuke Australia. Australia threatens to mail them a box of local wildlife [Scary]

Tuesday 25 April 14:50:04 UTC 2017

Scary [link] [217 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Evolution

Tuesday 25 April 14:49:04 UTC 2017

Order a beer at Kayabukiya Tavern, in Japan’s Tochigi prefecture, and it will be brought to you by one of five monkeys. Owner Kaoru Otsuka started his business nearly 30 years ago, but business really took off when he brought his pet macaque to the premises and got it to hand a wet oshibori towel to a customer. Now the … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » India's 68-year-old "Mother of Orphans" has raised over 1,400 abandoned children. "I am there for all those who have no one" [Hero]

Tuesday 25 April 14:30:42 UTC 2017

Hero [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How 'The Great Stink' Infiltrated London in 1858

Tuesday 25 April 13:58:49 UTC 2017

The past was a truly smelly place. [Link]

Weird Universe » The Sex Detector

Tuesday 25 April 13:47:50 UTC 2017

The Sex Detector made its debut around 1920. It was a gadget, sold by "Sex-Detector Laboratories," that promised to be able to detect the gender of an egg — or any piece of biological matter whose sex one might want to find out (oysters, butterflies, caterpillars, beetles, worms). It supposedly even worked on blood. So police could use it to … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these Easter bonnets [Photoshop]

Tuesday 25 April 13:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Secrets of Ghostwriters

Tuesday 25 April 13:00:00 UTC 2017

Some celebrities are brash in the public light, but get skittish when the writing starts. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » After one superpower invades Afghanistan a rival superpower arms insurgents. 1980? No. Today [Interesting]

Tuesday 25 April 12:50:03 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [99 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Arkansas death row: Let's play two [Sick]

Tuesday 25 April 12:02:20 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [168 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » State Capitals

Tuesday 25 April 11:45:00 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman banished from community after attacking her former lover with a sword. This is not a repeat from 1465 England [Strange]

Tuesday 25 April 11:34:21 UTC 2017

Strange [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man, Now in Pool Float Form

Tuesday 25 April 11:30:00 UTC 2017

Don't be surprised when people come by looking for deals on used cars. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Good: Oakland residents attempt historical reenactment. Bad: Train robbery [Fail]

Tuesday 25 April 11:25:21 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Oh we got both kinds. We got country AND western," say UW Madison bar owners [Murica]

Tuesday 25 April 11:15:21 UTC 2017

Murica [link] [171 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Life can be funny. One day you're on a reality TV show catching fish off the coast of Alaska and the next thing you know you're being arrested on meth charges in Phoenix [Dumbass]

Tuesday 25 April 10:43:20 UTC 2017

Dumbass [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Wikipedia founder coming out with new site that is all about fighting fake news. They'll hire and pay actual journalists which is the way you stop fake news. I know, you're saying, but what about Fox News? [Cool]

Tuesday 25 April 10:27:21 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trump declares war on Canada [Stupid]

Tuesday 25 April 10:13:20 UTC 2017

Stupid [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: The Real Zorro

Tuesday 25 April 10:00:00 UTC 2017

Check out these fascinating links! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » $100k/yr is considered low income in parts of the Bay Area. Sad and Scary tags fight over a crappy two room apartment for $5k/mo [Sad]

Tuesday 25 April 9:59:21 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [126 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Chicago General Motors Powerama

Tuesday 25 April 9:45:00 UTC 2017

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man denied lung transplant by University of Utah because he had THC traces in blood dies [Asinine]

Tuesday 25 April 9:15:20 UTC 2017

Asinine [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Quick Tips For Making Flowers Last

Tuesday 25 April 9:00:00 UTC 2017

Bloomin' great advice. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mall employees panic when topless female runs amok in shopping center splash pad. A 3-year-old topless female [Silly]

Tuesday 25 April 8:55:20 UTC 2017

Silly [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Discover the Historic Origin of Your State's Name With This Map

Tuesday 25 April 8:00:00 UTC 2017

From sea to shining sea. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Robert Pirsig has discovered the meaning of quality [Sad]

Tuesday 25 April 6:51:56 UTC 2017

Sad [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Update Your Picnic Menu With This Recipe Book

Tuesday 25 April 6:00:00 UTC 2017

Say goodbye to limp sandwiches and bland macaroni salad. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Earthquake hits Lancaster, Pennsylvania, not a manure pit was harmed [Amusing]

Tuesday 25 April 5:31:54 UTC 2017

Amusing [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Travel Innovations That Made the Modern World Possible

Tuesday 25 April 5:00:00 UTC 2017

Presented by National Geographic. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Attendees at the annual Denver 4/20 marijuana event turn the venue into a sh*thole. But, like, we didn't hurt anybody, man [Fail]

Tuesday 25 April 4:10:58 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [124 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Hold my beer" becomes "hold my baby" [Florida]

Tuesday 25 April 2:50:03 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today's Fark-ready headline: Florida man convicted of murdering former FSU mascot in fight over gumbo spices [Florida]

Tuesday 25 April 2:15:46 UTC 2017

Florida [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently Russia has its own version of Disneyland. Although in place of Mickey Mouse they've got dead Nazis and instead of the Magic Kingdom they've got a German building on fire [Interesting]

Tuesday 25 April 1:41:29 UTC 2017

Interesting [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Still putting two spaces after a period in a sentence? YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG [Fail]

Tuesday 25 April 1:10:33 UTC 2017

Fail [link] [391 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Homestar Runner's going back to their roots for a 20th anniversary episode, and they are using Mario Paint? Also Fark gets a big nod [Cool]

Tuesday 25 April 1:07:12 UTC 2017

Cool [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'll see your four Mattress Firms in the same mall parking lot and raise you 10 mattress stores within .6 miles of each other [Followup]

Tuesday 25 April 0:32:55 UTC 2017

Followup [link] [100 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mrs. Orange County, why don't you have a seat over there [Sick]

Tuesday 25 April 0:30:38 UTC 2017

Sick [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Single Americans Spend About $1596 on Dating Every Year

Tuesday 25 April 0:30:00 UTC 2017

Love may be free, but the pursuit of it certainly isn’t. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this red fox, you big dummy [Photoshop]

Tuesday 25 April 0:00:01 UTC 2017

Photoshop [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » These Five Comma Types Can Make or Break a Sentence

Tuesday 25 April 0:00:00 UTC 2017

Commas are pretty important. (They are also pretty, important.) [Link]

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