John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » You may want to read this before you go frolic in that pile of leaves [Cool]

Thursday 17 November 23:46:44 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Brilliant Gifts Everyone Is Going to Want

Thursday 17 November 23:24:15 UTC 2016

In an age where pretty much anything someone could want is just a couple of mouse clicks away, it’s the rare object of desire that makes you work for it. [Link]

Mental Floss » Did We Miss a Quarter of the Ebola Infections?

Thursday 17 November 23:24:14 UTC 2016

A new paper lends further support to the idea that a significant number of individuals can become infected with Ebola but not show symptoms. [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Brilliant Gifts for the Dog in Your Life

Thursday 17 November 23:24:02 UTC 2016

This holiday season, don’t forget the furry friends that bring you comfort and joy all year round. [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the States With No Repeated Vowels

Thursday 17 November 23:23:54 UTC 2016

Take the quiz! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man nets €44k by recycling one bottle. Hell, the pile of empty bourbon bottles outside Drew's office door might be worth enough to pay off the national debt [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 23:16:44 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Sacramento Animal Lover Offers to Cover All Adoption Fees at Local Shelter

Thursday 17 November 23:00:00 UTC 2016

Through the end of the year, Kim Pacini-Hauch will pay for all animal adoptions to help the shelter make room for new rescues. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Stay with me on this one: Satan, Jesus and God walk into a car dealership [Florida]

Thursday 17 November 22:46:44 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Japan’s Shower Habits Mean Nearly Every Phone There Is Waterproof

Thursday 17 November 22:30:00 UTC 2016

Japanese women can't resist texting in the shower, and phone companies have adapted. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cuba pardons nearly 800 convicts after finally realizing there's nothing of value in Cuba to steal to justify the cost of keeping someone in prison [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 22:16:44 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Domino’s Completes First Successful Pizza Delivery By Drone

Thursday 17 November 22:15:00 UTC 2016

The future of pizza delivery is here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Numerous holidays are right around the corner. Are you ready with a great dessert to take to the festivities? Share your fall and winter treats so your fellow Farkers can take the good stuff (or, c'mon, stay home and gorge) [Int

Thursday 17 November 22:00:00 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Tips for Moving Back in With Your Parents

Thursday 17 November 22:00:00 UTC 2016

Forced to move back in with your parents? Here's how to make it work. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fake news outperforms real news. News Directors everywhere stroking their beards in a super-villiany fashion [Fail]

Thursday 17 November 21:46:44 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » New Google Maps Tool Will Help People in India Locate Public Toilets

Thursday 17 November 21:30:00 UTC 2016

The addition to India's Google Maps will allow users to rate facilities, too. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yellow, foamy blob found outside hazardous waste facility was only 'soap,' according to spokesman, and was not Donald Trump as initially feared [Scary]

Thursday 17 November 21:16:44 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [43 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this guy between a rock and a hard place [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 November 21:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » New York City ATMs Are Covered in Skin Microbes, Mold, and Food Bacteria

Thursday 17 November 21:00:00 UTC 2016

ATMs are gross—but just how gross can depend on where they're installed. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you share a single Apple ID between your wife's iPhone and yours, call your girlfriend from a payphone [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 20:50:04 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [54 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Today's Top Amazon Deals Feel Like Early Black Friday Specials

Thursday 17 November 20:32:54 UTC 2016

Chromebooks, Sony headphones, huge discounts on boots, and much more. [Link]

Mental Floss » These Adidas Sneakers Are Made From Ocean Plastic

Thursday 17 November 20:32:53 UTC 2016

Each pair uses 11 plastic bottles retrieved from ocean waters. [Link]

Mental Floss » How to Tell the Difference Between 7 Pairs of Commonly Confused Animals

Thursday 17 November 20:30:00 UTC 2016

Sometimes, it’s all in the antennae. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ig-pay atin-lay on't-way ool-fay ops-cay [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 20:20:05 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » A Cushy History of Pound Puppies

Thursday 17 November 20:00:00 UTC 2016

The tiny faux-fur dogs were "adopted" by millions of kids, thanks to the imagination of a Ford assembly line worker. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Old and busted: Playing the race card. New hotness: Playing the Trump card [Murica]

Thursday 17 November 19:50:04 UTC 2016

Murica [link] [5 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » crazymentalblond says FML

Thursday 17 November 19:48:03 UTC 2016

Today, my class and I were discussing our country's relationship with other countries. One person stated that the French have never done anything for us. A classmate took that moment to chime in and ask, "I thought the French gave us that giant statue of the Mona Lisa?" He was dead serious. FML [Link]

FMyLife » ribx says FML

Thursday 17 November 19:48:02 UTC 2016

Today, despite feeling healthier than ever, losing fat, gaining muscle and having perfect blood results, my morbidly obese relatives keep telling me that my new vegan diet is "unhealthy". FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Canada’s Parliament Debates the Use of the Word ‘Fart’

Thursday 17 November 19:45:00 UTC 2016

Should members of Parliament talk about flatulence? It’s controversial. [Link]

Mental Floss » Scientists Make Antibiotics from Bacteria Found in the Human Body

Thursday 17 November 19:30:00 UTC 2016

The new drugs may even be able to help treat MRSA—a condition that, by definition, is resistant to antibiotics. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sick of drivers behind them flashing their high beams, drivers in China are putting scary ghost and monster decals in their back windows to freak out the offenders [Weird]

Thursday 17 November 19:20:05 UTC 2016

Weird [link] [101 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Sweden Now Has a Hotline to Help Deal With Mansplaining Jerks at Work

Thursday 17 November 19:15:00 UTC 2016

Someone talking down to you? Callers in Sweden can help. [Link]

Mental Floss » Good News: Low-Cost Mosquito Nets Continue to Prevent Malaria

Thursday 17 November 19:00:00 UTC 2016

A report from the World Health Organization finds that treated bed nets stop malaria transmission even among pesticide-resistant mosquitoes. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Important safety tip: Do not attempt to change your pants while drinking and driving [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 18:50:04 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Brainy Facts About the Neocortex

Thursday 17 November 18:30:00 UTC 2016

The brain is arguably the one organ that makes you who you are—and the largest part of the brain is the neocortex. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Accused prostitute to undercover cop: Guacamole is extra [Silly]

Thursday 17 November 18:20:05 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Son steals $8,000 coin collection from father, puts it through Coinstar to make $60 to buy crack [Facepalm]

Thursday 17 November 17:50:04 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [144 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Long Distance

Thursday 17 November 17:36:58 UTC 2016

[Link]

Mental Floss » The Women Who Chained Themselves to D.C.'s Cherry Trees

Thursday 17 November 17:30:00 UTC 2016

In November 1938, D.C.'s famous trees saw some fireworks. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Driver fleeing hit-and-run with a car gets into second hit-and-run with a train [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 17:20:05 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Enjoy Explosion-Free Fried Turkey With This Discounted Cooker

Thursday 17 November 17:00:00 UTC 2016

Just hook up a propane tank and get cooking. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The greatest threat of our time is evolving: "Grizzlies are learning that gunshots are dinner bells" [Scary]

Thursday 17 November 16:50:04 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [150 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Father Pens Spot-On Response to Son's Permission Slip to Read 'Fahrenheit 451'

Thursday 17 November 16:30:00 UTC 2016

You should expect a bit of sarcasm when your student's father is a 'Daily Show' writer. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bob Dylan has planted his last potato. That's, uh, apparently a bad thing [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 16:20:05 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [7 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Thursday 17 November 16:13:39 UTC 2016

Today, I am starting a new job. Only problem is, I haven't been told what my duties are, who my line manager is or who to ask if I need help. FML [Link]

FMyLife » rainbowlack says FML

Thursday 17 November 16:13:38 UTC 2016

Today, I was in the city newspaper for something I worked my ass off on. There was a picture of me working on my creation in the article with a caption, something like, "Chloe B, part of the robotics team." My name isn't Chloe, and I talked to the article writers. I haven't heard back at all. FML [Link]

FMyLife » beetregeneration says FML

Thursday 17 November 16:13:37 UTC 2016

Today, I was walking to a bathroom on campus before class when my professor walked in behind me. There were two urinals in the bathroom, we walked right up next to each other and unzipped our pants in unison. It became so awkward for me, I actually said out loud, "Nope, too awkward" and left. FML [Link]

FMyLife » num1piglover says FML

Thursday 17 November 16:13:36 UTC 2016

Today, my dad told my mom to only drop off my sister for Thanksgiving and not me. Guess I was wrong about him wanting to work on our relationship. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Smart Facts About ‘Revenge of the Nerds’

Thursday 17 November 16:00:00 UTC 2016

More than 30 years after the classic comedy's release, nerds rule the world. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Denver cops unveil 'pot breathalyzer' which if you put the batteries in backwards makes a great bong, man [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 15:50:04 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [233 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Apple Is Releasing a Coffee Table Book of Its Gadgets

Thursday 17 November 15:30:00 UTC 2016

It will run you $300. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Director of National Intelligence: My position is an oxymoron, so I'll be going now [Obvious]

Thursday 17 November 15:26:34 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [83 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Drive a Tractor and Raise Livestock in This Meditative Farming Game

Thursday 17 November 15:00:00 UTC 2016

Low-stakes gaming is all the rage. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I was a gardener like you, then I took an arrow to the thigh [Florida]

Thursday 17 November 14:57:53 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "A thrill seeker from Sheffield has combined his passions for biscuits and bungee jumping by successfully dunking from 75 metres in the air" (w/ vid) [Amusing]

Thursday 17 November 14:50:04 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Give yourself an honest review and realize that there is no reason in the world that an attractive lady from the Philippines wants to be your friend" [PSA]

Thursday 17 November 14:20:05 UTC 2016

PSA [link] [170 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Destructivist Art

Thursday 17 November 14:06:48 UTC 2016

In September 1966, the first ever "Destruction in Art Symposium" was held in London, highlighting the work of the self-styled Destructivists. Basically, they destroyed things and called it art.

LA Times staff writer Robert Toth delivered the following report from the Symposium (LA Times – Sep 11, 1966):

The artists say they create by demolishing objects and even killing animals. … [Link]

Weird Universe » The Frozen Woman

Thursday 17 November 14:06:47 UTC 2016


Original article here.

Alas, two years after the coverage above, she was gone.

Original article here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this Pallas cat [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 November 14:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 13 Behind-the-Scenes Secrets of Roller Derby

Thursday 17 November 14:00:00 UTC 2016

There's a good reason players refuse to wear the number "1" on their jersey. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A Swedish union has set up a hotline for workers to report instances of "mansplaining". Actually, mansplaining is when you explain something, typically to a woman, in a manner regarded as condescending or patronizing [PSA]

Thursday 17 November 13:50:04 UTC 2016

PSA [link] [221 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » For Sale: The Dress Marilyn Monroe Wore While Singing 'Happy Birthday' to JFK

Thursday 17 November 13:00:00 UTC 2016

The gown is “truly the most important artifact of Marilyn’s career that could ever be sold.” [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dog saves 5-year-old with Down syndrome who was trapped in a clothes dryer. Your dog wants Bounce dryer sheets [Hero]

Thursday 17 November 12:52:29 UTC 2016

Hero [link] [52 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Too broke for missiles, switching to guns [Facepalm]

Thursday 17 November 12:52:28 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [123 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » LAPD planning stings to crack down on holiday 'porch pirates' [Amusing]

Thursday 17 November 12:50:04 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Long Distance

Thursday 17 November 12:45:00 UTC 2016

[Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Magical Gifts for Unicorn Lovers

Thursday 17 November 12:30:00 UTC 2016

Colorful and magical gifts for the young at heart. [Link]

GraphJam » At least he is not the only one learning about…

Thursday 17 November 12:27:02 UTC 2016

politics - 8990184960 Graph by: (via Imgur) Tagged: politics Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This may come as a shock to those of you who don't live in Texas, but old white judges in Houston don't give a fark about poor black people [Obvious]

Thursday 17 November 12:05:28 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [166 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Packing Hacks for Your Trip Home for the Holidays

Thursday 17 November 12:00:00 UTC 2016

Presented by Allstate. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man turns to ID theft after wife leaves him for an Elvis impersonator. No, Subby is not having a stroke [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 11:52:29 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Teen surprised by Captain America goes out like Captain Marvel [Sad]

Thursday 17 November 11:29:29 UTC 2016

Sad [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: A Glossary of Fantastic Beasts

Thursday 17 November 11:00:00 UTC 2016

Great links for all you great internet surfers! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why you should be drinking whiskey this Thanksgiving- besides your relatives, that is [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 10:32:00 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Even if your hospital is part of your insurance network, the physicians working inside the ER may not be, leading to thousands of dollars of extra bills and a possibly a return visit for your heart attack after the bill [Scary]

Thursday 17 November 10:31:28 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [157 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Surprising Ways Robots Can Make Your Life Easier

Thursday 17 November 10:00:00 UTC 2016

Presented by Neato Robotics. [Link]

Mental Floss » Watch the Opening Credits of 'Friends' Get the Funko Treatment

Thursday 17 November 9:00:00 UTC 2016

The upside of being plastic? You won’t get soaked while taking a dip in a fountain. [Link]

FMyLife » CaffeinePlz_24_7 says FML

Thursday 17 November 8:20:27 UTC 2016

Today, my mum called me at work in hysterics, saying she had just been arrested and that I needed to get her dog from her house. I had no idea why she was arrested. I hear nothing from her until 1 a.m. when she calls, waking me up. The first words out of her mouth are, "How's the dog?" FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Nintendo Is Making an Escape Room Featuring 'The Legend of Zelda'

Thursday 17 November 7:56:14 UTC 2016

“The Defenders of the Triforce" opens early next year, so start your training now. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The high price of elderly romance – flirty matchmaking trips to IKEA, differences in living habits, adult children questions, pensions. To say nothing of the chafing [Obvious]

Thursday 17 November 7:26:26 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Charles Darwin is not known for his cooking skills, but his braising recipe is to die for, and the meat just falls off the bones [Followup]

Thursday 17 November 7:06:00 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » There are plenty of ways one could send a cake through the British Post. This is not one of them [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 7:01:48 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 1-Year-Old Gets a Custom-Built Space Shuttle for His Birthday

Thursday 17 November 7:00:00 UTC 2016

This dad went above and beyond for his son's first birthday. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police in Texas are turning on their sirens and pulling people over so they can give them free Thanksgiving turkeys. And if they just so happen to smell alcohol or pot during these friendly little stops, so be it [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 6:33:00 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cheetos are not a good fire starter [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 6:19:00 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Point to Point

Thursday 17 November 6:07:05 UTC 2016

Here’s a triangle, ABC, and an arbitrary point, D, in its interior. How can we prove that AD + DB < AC + CB? The fact seems obvious, but when the problem is presented on its own, outside of a textbook or some course of study, we have no hint as to what technique to use to prove it. Construct … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hipsters are rebooting taxidermy to reflect their love of animals and fringe art. "Sure, some of us enjoy black lipstick and winged eyeliner, but that really isn't the focus… Taxidermy today has an edge that I do not think it had in its own

Thursday 17 November 5:32:00 UTC 2016

Ironic [link] [76 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 602: "Orange 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 17 November 5:01:00 UTC 2016

Farktography [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Swinging the Rudder Around on cycling safety, MP proposes 'Dutch Reach' bill [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 4:51:07 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cuban seamen, condoms, fish… this joke should write itself [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 3:44:59 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ♪ Florida man, Florida man, sells tainted South American cheese products and gets fifteen months in the federal pen, and I don't know where to go with this song after that ♪ [Florida]

Thursday 17 November 3:42:05 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Flights back to normal after police identify the body of the gunman who apparently met a man he didn't like earlier in the day outside of Will Rogers International Airport in Oklahoma City [Followup]

Thursday 17 November 3:40:50 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Actress who played Michelle Obama goes low when police go high regarding her mother's arrest over a bad check [Weird]

Thursday 17 November 3:23:10 UTC 2016

Weird [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » University of Albany sorority members arrested for forcing pledges to eat mud and garbage. Police charge them with impersonating a fraternity [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 November 3:01:21 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cow's great escape attempt foiled after jumping overboard, swimming to shore and then running through town. To be fair, Steve McQueen had a motorcycle and he still didn't make it [Misc]

Thursday 17 November 2:36:59 UTC 2016

Misc [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Worried about birth control? Try an IUD: It will last longer than a Trump Presidency. Submitter's Warning: If you experience a Trump Presidency lasting longer than four years, please contact a medical professional [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 2:18:20 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Breakfast in London, lunch in New York, luggage in Los Angeles [Interesting]

Thursday 17 November 2:17:43 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 7 Surprising Buildings That Were Once the World’s Tallest

Thursday 17 November 2:00:00 UTC 2016

The back catalog of former World’s Tallest Building title-holders actually includes some quite surprising entries. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Party Rock Fire rages on mostly uncontained in western North Carolina, where residents are not having a good time [Scary]

Thursday 17 November 1:55:54 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canadian Feds ok butt secs. Suggest using maple syrup as lube [PSA]

Thursday 17 November 1:34:05 UTC 2016

PSA [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dead pig carcasses reported on I-75 after accident. On the bright side, at least they're not live pig carcasses [Florida]

Thursday 17 November 1:12:16 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this interrogation [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 November 1:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Three Dutch WW2 shipwrecks vanished from Java Sea bed. Divers say there are large holes, they cannot even find a rudder [Strange]

Thursday 17 November 0:50:27 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Look Up! The 'Doomsday' Leonid Meteor Shower Peaks Tonight

Thursday 17 November 0:30:00 UTC 2016

The good news: Tonight is the best night of the year to spot the Leonid meteor shower. The bad news: there’s a giant moon up there washing things out. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Your supreme leader so fat when he wears a Malcolm X t-shirt, helicopters try to land on his back [Repeat]

Thursday 17 November 0:28:38 UTC 2016

Repeat [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The rare headline question that is answered not only yes, but "Hell Yes" [Obvious]

Thursday 17 November 0:06:49 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Van Gogh Sketchbook That Might Not Be by Van Gogh

Thursday 17 November 0:00:00 UTC 2016

Art experts are feuding over whether a sketchbook attributed to the famous artist is the real thing. [Link]

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