Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » The "Wet Prince of Bel Air" used 11.8 Million gallons of water last year. Gotta keep the lawn Fresh, Prince [Facepalm]

Saturday 24 September 23:12:52 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Former NFL linebacker has quite an adventure accidentally solving a murder case and, thanks to CTE, will treasure those memories for the next 3.5 hours [Interesting]

Saturday 24 September 22:17:37 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Photographer sues after he was arrested for taking pictures in a public place. Isn't this America? I thought this was America [Facepalm]

Saturday 24 September 21:56:00 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Fark Store Daily Deal: TNT Stream unblocker – watch the streaming services you subscribe to when you're traveling or living in areas that have location blocks. (Sponsored Link) [Plug]

Saturday 24 September 21:45:09 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Not News: Crime stoppers stop crime. News: Uncovers a $3 million marijuana trafficking business. Fark: President of Crime Stoppers is arrested [Ironic]

Saturday 24 September 21:05:37 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » How middle class are you? No need to answer if you're poorer. Please do answer if you're richer so we can gather pitchforks and torches [Interesting]

Saturday 24 September 20:54:37 UTC 2016

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Mental Floss » You Can Now Make a Drone With LEGOs

Saturday 24 September 20:27:08 UTC 2016

Don't worry about smashing this airborne vehicle to smithereens—you can always rebuild. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dog will not face charges in stabbing of owner [Followup]

Saturday 24 September 20:19:37 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » St. Louis couple wins $3 million settlement against after sedative injection into husband's hand left him unable to walk. Wait, what? [Strange]

Saturday 24 September 20:00:58 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this Infrared Helix. Difficulty: No politics [Photoshop]

Saturday 24 September 20:00:01 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Solar plant is fined for pollution [Ironic]

Saturday 24 September 19:44:39 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Man cited for using the classic mannequin in the carpool lane trick. Funny mannequin thread, anyone? [Dumbass]

Saturday 24 September 19:33:57 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Pro-gun rally in Salem, Oregon, burns Gov. Brown in effigy. Hmm… you'd think they'd shoot her in effigy, but I digress [Sick]

Saturday 24 September 19:06:37 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Newspapers across Britain are creating hysteria about super fleas with giant penises invading people's homes. Sorry to disappoint any horny female fleas [Amusing]

Saturday 24 September 18:19:58 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » ISIS wives are given suicide vests and machine guns as wedding gifts. Brides will now wear something old, something new, something borrowed and something blew [Scary]

Saturday 24 September 17:34:12 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » "In terms of horrible seat companions on a flight, this rates between a drunk couple fighting and someone who has shiat their pants. But creepier" [Creepy]

Saturday 24 September 16:45:15 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Man who absconded with a naked Donald Trump statue surrenders to police, but refuses to speak about his actions [Florida]

Saturday 24 September 16:13:13 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » "Wayne Neal has exited his rickety old body, having lived twice as long as he expected and way longer then he deserved." And it just gets better [Amusing]

Saturday 24 September 16:11:10 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Just like today's Saturday Morning Book Club is late, what books have you never gotten around to reading? [Interesting]

Saturday 24 September 16:00:00 UTC 2016

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Mental Floss » Grab This Weekend's Best Amazon Deals While You Can

Saturday 24 September 15:14:21 UTC 2016

As a recurring feature, our team combs the Web and shares some amazing Amazon deals we’ve turned up. Here’s what caught our eye today, September 24. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Climate change threatens the world's coffee supply. Price may go up so much that people who are brewing a cup at home will soon be able to have the same feeling of what it's like to go to Starbucks [Scary]

Saturday 24 September 14:33:09 UTC 2016

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Weird Universe » Hypnotic Boob Enhancement

Saturday 24 September 14:23:59 UTC 2016

Michael Stivers had an interesting career. He was a professional wrestler, who used the stage name "Pretty Boy Behning." He was also a police officer for 13 years, but around 1990 he quit that profession to become a hypnotist.

At first, he ran a pretty ordinary hypotism business — using hypnotism to help people lose weight or quit smoking. But … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Because nobody will get annoyed with a vehicle that automatically honks at pedestrians in its path [Asinine]

Saturday 24 September 14:21:07 UTC 2016

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Overheard In The Office » Large and Cold and Benign?

Saturday 24 September 13:52:38 UTC 2016

Worker #1: Did you vote?
Worker #2: I can’t vote.
Worker #1: Why not?
Worker #2: I’m not a citizen.
Worker #1: You’re from here, no?
Worker #2: No, I’m from Canada.
Worker #1: Oh… You don’t look like a Canadian. 45 Rockefeller Center
New York, New York [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That's….actually a pretty good idea [Cool]

Saturday 24 September 13:28:16 UTC 2016

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Weird Universe » Lou Bunin’s ALICE IN WONDERLAND

Saturday 24 September 13:06:57 UTC 2016

It's harder to be more surreal than the original, but this mixed live-actor stop-motion version by Lou Bunin tries hard.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this public screening [Photoshop]

Saturday 24 September 13:00:01 UTC 2016

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Mental Floss » Welcome to Wigtown: A Photo Tour of Scotland's National Book Town

Saturday 24 September 12:30:00 UTC 2016

This tiny Scottish town is every bibliophile's dream. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Pasadena Humane Society's donation box has a sign that reads: 'It isn't every day that you can say you saved a life'. Well, an anonymous donor just saved more than one life by dropping $8,000 in the box, just in time for Caturday

Saturday 24 September 12:00:00 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Father lets 5-year-old son perform burnouts in his car because 'car addiction stops drug addiction' and besides, nothing could ever go wrong [Facepalm]

Saturday 24 September 11:39:41 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Disney pulls its new 'Moana' Halloween costume because one mom complained. "You're literally letting children pretend to be Polynesian" [Silly]

Saturday 24 September 10:23:33 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Those F-35s are really on fire [Murica]

Saturday 24 September 9:14:33 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Remember when you were in high school and your teacher beat you up because he gave you four thousand dollars for some weed but you just took his money and spent it? [Fail]

Saturday 24 September 8:38:44 UTC 2016

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Mental Floss » Watch Leonard Nimoy's 'Star Trek Memories'

Saturday 24 September 8:30:00 UTC 2016

Live long and prosper. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Give me an S!" …crickets [Strange]

Saturday 24 September 8:29:54 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Zika? In MY meth? [Silly]

Saturday 24 September 8:19:50 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Good idea: We'll move the mattress on top of your van early in the morning. Bad idea: No need to tie it down, I'll just sit on it [Sad]

Saturday 24 September 7:36:43 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Three lobsters? That will be $75,000. Please pay the court clerk [Followup]

Saturday 24 September 6:52:00 UTC 2016

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Mental Floss » Alien ‘Dragon Boogers’ Are Clogging Californian Waters

Saturday 24 September 6:30:00 UTC 2016

They don't actually come from outer space, although they look like it. [Link]

Futility Closet » Shifting Ground

Saturday 24 September 6:26:54 UTC 2016

For her 2000 book Obituaries in American Culture, Janice Hume collated thousands of newspaper death notices to reveal the most admired characteristics of American men in various eras: 1818: Patriotism, gallantry, vigilance, boldness, merit as an officer
1838: Benevolence, intellect, kindness, affection, indulgence, devotion to family
1855: Public esteem, activity, amiability, fame, intelligence, generosity
1870: Christianity, education, generosity, energy, perseverance, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Contender for the Turner Prize: Venetian Sebastiano Magnanini, the art thief who once roadied for Prince, his body was tied to shopping trolley and weighed down with dumbbells before being thrown into canal found by tourist and his seven-year-old son

Saturday 24 September 3:43:11 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Museum's restoration of a large fish finds 1883 newspaper stuffed inside … announcing the landing of the fish [Strange]

Saturday 24 September 3:42:23 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Because when you think 're-creation of the biblical idea of Noah's Ark', you automatically think of Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada [Asinine]

Saturday 24 September 2:25:46 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » ♫ Leprosy. I'm not half the kid I used to be. Body parts keep falling off of me. Can't go to school with leprosy ♫ [Scary]

Saturday 24 September 2:01:46 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » "Any past crimes?" "Murder. Will that be a problem?" "Oh, no, the TSA doesn't care. Welcome to your new job" [Scary]

Saturday 24 September 1:58:48 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Japanese love hotel plans to apply for Guinness World Record, but not for the reason you are thinking of [Spiffy]

Saturday 24 September 0:49:46 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Man buys computer and is willing to sit in a park to prevent Uber from offering people rides at low cost [Silly]

Saturday 24 September 0:49:12 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » To whom it may concern: Cara is tardy this morning as a result of a condition known as teenage-ism. She suffered from an inability to remove herself from her bed, and also felt the need to talk back to her birth-giver [Amusing]

Saturday 24 September 0:31:32 UTC 2016

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Fark.com RSS » Feds say Cleveland man bought 28 houses in the Cleveland area and used them as fronts for his drug selling business, say they became suspicious when they realized someone was voluntarily buying real estate in Cleveland [Obvious]

Saturday 24 September 0:25:46 UTC 2016

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John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons