John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Remember kids, if you drop out of school you could wind up in jell [Cool]

Thursday 9 June 23:49:23 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man who's clearly doing it wrong falls asleep at the wheel, then tries to flee when cops notice a large quantity of cocaine on the seat [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 23:44:22 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Disney cashier accused of stealing $112k from Magic Kingdom restaurant register, or a meal for a family of 4. Florida: It took Disney 2 years to figure it out [Florida]

Thursday 9 June 23:44:19 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It turns out the elderly driver wasn't drunk or in need of help. He was just looking for some rhubarb pie [Strange]

Thursday 9 June 23:42:23 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chinese Government: We're not as good at making up lies as we used to be [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 23:38:10 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » California has some new laws; one to help you live, one to help you die, and one to annoy hipsters [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 23:36:44 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Here Are the Names of the Periodic Table's Four Newest Elements

Thursday 9 June 23:30:00 UTC 2016

In five months, they'll be official. [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Exploding Career Opportunities

Thursday 9 June 23:15:00 UTC 2016

"Professional lotto winner" remains woefully under-represented. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Another Confederate flag is coming down, this time at The Washington National Cathedral…..Wait they had a Confederate flag in the Cathedral ? [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 23:12:44 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 TV Characters Who Were Inspired By Real People

Thursday 9 June 23:00:00 UTC 2016

To get into the role of The Countess on ‘American Horror Story: Hotel,’ Lady Gaga studied Robert Durst. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Kitten adopted by mechanic who found her trapped in Hyundai Sonata. Poor kitten… no one wants to be trapped inside a Hyundai [Sappy]

Thursday 9 June 22:56:04 UTC 2016

Sappy [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Russia grounds entire fleet of SU-27 fighter planes after deadly crash, putting their entire program of provocative flights against NATO aircraft in jeopardy [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 22:43:10 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Governor Kasich finally realizes the cure for dealing with the ailment "Living in Ohio" [Spiffy]

Thursday 9 June 22:41:09 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man carrying umbrella robs bank. Police commissioner asks Batman for help [Strange]

Thursday 9 June 22:35:17 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Nothing Is Hidden in This Fully Transparent Hong Kong Office

Thursday 9 June 22:30:00 UTC 2016

You can even see through the desks. [Link]

Mental Floss » Study Finds Women Are Twice as Likely to Suffer From Anxiety

Thursday 9 June 22:15:00 UTC 2016

And there are a few theories as to why. [Link]

Mental Floss » How to Turn a Battery Into a Homemade Electric Train

Thursday 9 June 22:00:00 UTC 2016

Here's your next rainy-day science project. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » FL man calls 911 because his girlfriend won't buy him vodka. I think many farkers would agree this is a 911-worthy crisis [Florida]

Thursday 9 June 21:57:19 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In America they call it an arrest or a "collar" but in France, they call it " Ass fouettant avec du fromage" [Repeat]

Thursday 9 June 21:55:40 UTC 2016

Repeat [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NYC's Verrazano Bridge, North America's longest suspension bridge, has been spelled wrong … for 52 years [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 21:46:07 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [52 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Normally when someone says they've dropped a bomb in the restroom, this isn't what they mean [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 21:45:22 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Potential jurors lift their middle fingers to the Stanford sex assault case judge, refuse to serve on his juries citing him as a hardship [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 21:41:13 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [220 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Seagull falls in vat of chicken tikka masala and turns bright orange, earning it the nickname Gullfrazie. Some would call that korma [Repeat]

Thursday 9 June 21:31:12 UTC 2016

Repeat [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Instagrammer Creates Junk Food Art That Swaps Logos With Calorie Counts

Thursday 9 June 21:30:00 UTC 2016

A lot more colorful than those standard nutrition facts. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Due to a 19th Century quirk of wording, Canadians can now legally allow dogs to lick peanut butter off their genitals [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 21:25:22 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When you think bowling alley food, you think Schlitz and burgers. Not Heady Topper and Citizen Cider's ginger-laced Dirty Mayor, mac and cheese with spinach, smoked bacon and truffle oil, and skewers of Indonesian chicken satay, or crab fritters

Thursday 9 June 21:11:21 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police shoot the wrong innocent person after going to the wrong address [Asinine]

Thursday 9 June 21:10:23 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » On second thought, maybe I shouldn't have written as a character witness in support of a rapist [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 21:02:18 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Pudding Cups of British Pudding Terms and Idioms

Thursday 9 June 21:00:00 UTC 2016

In the U.S., pudding has a relatively small life, nutritionally and lexically. But when you look back at jolly old England, this seemingly one-dimensional word has lived a vibrant life in metaphors and idioms. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: What was an unexpected win you had in the kitchen? Was it a recipe you 'fixed' or a utensil you found on the cheap? Victory is yours.. now share the good news. Difficulty: aside from not poisoning your family [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 21:00:00 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Escaped capybaras continue to outwit Toronto trackers [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 20:54:23 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Evangelical Christians say they are the most hated group in America. You know, the country where 'In God We Trust' is stamped on every coin, polling stations are held in churches, and Presidents end speeches with 'God bless America' [

Thursday 9 June 20:45:23 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [183 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Divide and Conquer

Thursday 9 June 20:31:43 UTC 2016

Facing dental surgery one day, mathematician Matt Parker asked Twitter for a math puzzle to distract him. A friend challenged him to put the digits 1-9 in order so that the first two digits formed a number that was a multiple of 2, the first three digits were a multiple of 3, and so on. Leaving the digits in the … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oklahoma Police say they found "no evidence of suicide" in the death of the OK oil billionaire that was about to lose everything after being indicted on federal fraud charges who crashed his car into a bridge abutment while going over 100mph

Thursday 9 June 20:31:22 UTC 2016

Unlikely [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Toy Story. Voltron. Shut up. And. Take. My. Money [Cool]

Thursday 9 June 20:16:12 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police officers charged after using their helicopter to film surprise amateur porn [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 20:03:23 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this nope [Photoshop]

Thursday 9 June 20:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Louisiana governor signs law raising minimum stripper age to 21. Younger dancers to volunteer, or work the parking lot tailgate parties [Boobies]

Thursday 9 June 19:30:20 UTC 2016

Boobies [link] [138 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Something Fishy: Big Mouth Billy Bass

Thursday 9 June 19:30:00 UTC 2016

Queen Elizabeth, Al Gore, and Tony Soprano all had one. [Link]

Mental Floss » 'The Powerpuff Girls' Will Take On Coding in New Episodes

Thursday 9 June 19:15:00 UTC 2016

Sugar, spice, and everything digital. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Former judge who sued dry cleaner for $65M for lost pants loses his shirt to the DC Board of Professional Conduct [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 19:12:38 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Apparently Seagull curry smells amazing, once you get past the color [Strange]

Thursday 9 June 19:10:12 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The 5 Best Sunglasses for Sports

Thursday 9 June 19:00:00 UTC 2016

Athletic sunglasses have come a long way, now sporting more fashionable designs, advanced materials, and features tailored to specific activities. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The Triborg: it's part tank, part skateboard and part dirt bike, and when you see it coming you wonder what it is [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 18:54:11 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bad: Being found sleeping at work. Very bad: By the CEO. Very very bad: Who takes a selfie with you and posts it to Twitter [Awkward]

Thursday 9 June 18:38:12 UTC 2016

Awkward [link] [67 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Obama picks another nominee that Republicans aren't going to like [NewsFlash]

Thursday 9 June 18:36:45 UTC 2016

NewsFlash [link] [370 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » A Frank Lloyd Wright Retrospective Will Open at MoMA Next Year

Thursday 9 June 18:30:00 UTC 2016

An expansive exhibition on the groundbreaking 20th-century architect will go on display in New York City next June. [Link]

Mental Floss » Man Powered His Artificial Heart in a Backpack for 18 Months

Thursday 9 June 18:30:00 UTC 2016

Stan Larkin received a heart transplant in May after relying on an artificial heart for more than a year. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Being impaled by a flying beach umbrella is not the ideal way to die [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 18:24:21 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [69 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drone and satellite imagery reveals possible location of the Holy Grail. Even cooler: the same technology was used to locate the Ark of the Covenant [Cool]

Thursday 9 June 18:21:10 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Sanders pledges fealty to the Crown Princess of the Democratic Party [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 18:17:37 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [373 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » No concealed carry for YOU [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 18:11:22 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [249 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » HuffPo editorial argues in favor of violent protest against Trump. Naturally, some conservatives have problems with this, and show it by arguing in favor of violence against editorial writer. 6/9/2016: we have achieved an ouroboros of fail [Facepalm]

Thursday 9 June 18:09:09 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [47 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Young mom returns home to find armed burglar leaving her house. Does what any sensible person would do – beats him with a chainsaw and holds him down until police can arrive [Spiffy]

Thursday 9 June 18:05:06 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [50 comments] [Link]

The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » Remember that time a firework tipped over?

Thursday 9 June 17:36:46 UTC 2016

Remember that time a firework tipped over?View [Link]

Mental Floss » Follow Along with a Conversation in Doric Scots

Thursday 9 June 17:30:00 UTC 2016

The Scottish Corpus of Text and Speech (SCOTS) is a collection of over 1300 spoken and written texts covering a wide range of language use in Scotland. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bill Gates announces he'll give away 100,000 a) Windows Phones, b) xBox Ones, or c) Chickens? [Spiffy]

Thursday 9 June 17:18:37 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Emergency room nurse faces up to 15 years in prison for groping three women while he was taking their blood pressure. See, if he'd just gone ahead and raped them, he'd be out in like 18 months [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 17:13:08 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [53 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Belt issues says FML

Thursday 9 June 17:09:16 UTC 2016

Today, I took a train for 5 hours to a remote northern community. My belt broke as I was getting off the train. I went to the only store and bought a new belt. Taking it off to go to bed, the new belt broke. I have to go visit clients today with a shoestring holding up my pants. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Because of heavy flooding, spiders are taking to the trees. Sleep tight [Creepy]

Thursday 9 June 16:56:10 UTC 2016

Creepy [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » THE Ohio State university decides to allow beer sales at sports events. Revenue from sales to pay for additional cops. Additional cops required because of beer sales. Moebius strippers arriving soon [Facepalm]

Thursday 9 June 16:51:38 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Turns out you can be above water and still suffer an attack by an electric NOPE [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 16:50:24 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Movie written by algorithm turns out to be hilarious, intense, full of artificial intelligence [Spiffy]

Thursday 9 June 16:50:12 UTC 2016

Spiffy [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Best Amazon Deals We Could Find Today, June 9

Thursday 9 June 16:26:53 UTC 2016

As a recurring feature, our team combs the Web and shares some amazing Amazon deals we’ve turned up. Here’s what caught our eye today, June 9. [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Safari Animals

Thursday 9 June 16:26:43 UTC 2016

[Link]

Mental Floss » Video Reveals Average Hollywood Film Crew Salaries

Thursday 9 June 16:15:00 UTC 2016

The difference in pay for various on-set roles may surprise you. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » DUI checkpoint, big dude, no neck, goatee ribbon, red pantyhose, and a tutu. Oh yes it gets weirder [Weird]

Thursday 9 June 16:01:48 UTC 2016

Weird [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The fox was reported to be sparkling clean & free of streaks [Strange]

Thursday 9 June 15:55:05 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Disciplined for not wearing a bra, high school girl creates No Bra, No Problem Facebook group. And since you've already clicked the link, Trump has made Snoop Dogg his running mate [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 15:54:21 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [212 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mississippi named the least safe state in the country. The study was based on poverty, alcohol, and the number of people with a valid NRA membership [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 15:36:42 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A single chart that explains how politics let down the American people since 1998 [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 15:34:10 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [297 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Trump would tear down Mecca's holiest Islamic sites and replace them with cheesy malls, expensive tacky hotels and office towers…he would, if the Saudis weren't doing that already [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 15:33:20 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Paradise Contained: Visit This German Tropical Resort Inside an Old Soviet Airplane Hangar

Thursday 9 June 15:30:00 UTC 2016

The world's largest airport hangar is now a full, self-contained tropical paradise. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » China plans massive Sea Lab underneath the water. A Sealab, At the bottom of the sea. Pod Six is jerks [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 15:27:17 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hawaii judge drops murder charge against evil twin [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 15:23:05 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » So, crushing up ecstasy in a bag and swallowing it like it was crumbs in a chip bag will kill you, and it's even worse if you've already done cocaine and heroin. WHO KNEW [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 15:13:07 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Doctor assisted dying is about to become legal in Canada. Or as it's called in the U.S., membership in an HMO [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 15:06:29 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Deer May Rely on Internal Compasses to Avoid Colliding When They Flee

Thursday 9 June 15:00:00 UTC 2016

A new study suggests that fleeing deer leap along a north-south axis to keep everyone moving safely in the same direction. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What was it like to live in the Soviet Union? For some, it was living in a self-sufficient, independent country full of urine-smelling babushkas [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 14:51:05 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Want a whole lot of Zika? Go to Puerto Rico. "The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates 25% of Puerto Rico's 3.5 million population will be infected with Zika by the end of 2016" [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 14:48:24 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Store Daily Deal: Speed reading course and speed e-reader subscription. If you read less than 3 pages per minute it explodes. (Sponsored Link) [Plug]

Thursday 9 June 14:41:39 UTC 2016

Plug [link] [2 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A mom left her infant child in a hot car while she stripped at a club. Yes, again. No, this is not a repeat [Facepalm]

Thursday 9 June 14:27:58 UTC 2016

Facepalm [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Star-Studded Facts About the Hollywood Sign

Thursday 9 June 14:26:35 UTC 2016

When developers put up a larger-than-life advertisement for their new L.A. housing development in 1923, they had no idea it would become one of the most iconic landmarks of all time. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bristol Palin marries the father of one of her children [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 14:19:07 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » …As I Had Requested in That Inter-Office Memo.

Thursday 9 June 14:00:02 UTC 2016

Woman exiting bathroom stall to woman washing her hands at sink: Shirley! I like you! You've filled out your jeans! Chesapeake, Virginia [Link]

Mental Floss » What's the Difference Between a Broadway and Off-Broadway Show?

Thursday 9 June 14:00:00 UTC 2016

It has to do with a few seats (and a couple million dollars). [Link]

Mental Floss » South Korea Tested Alarms That Help Pregnant Train Passengers Find Seats

Thursday 9 June 13:30:00 UTC 2016

A blinking pink light gets passengers' attention. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Young boy infected by what appears to be Greyscale. Let's hope Jorah Mormont finds the cure soon [Sad]

Thursday 9 June 13:28:23 UTC 2016

Sad [link] [66 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Jo_kat says FML

Thursday 9 June 13:02:02 UTC 2016

Today, I came home to find out my stay-at-home neighbor built his kids an awesome treehouse deck two stories up in the air. Three feet from my house. Directly adjacent to my second-floor bedroom. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this golden axe [Photoshop]

Thursday 9 June 13:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Make Sense of Menu Jargon With This Colorful Glossary

Thursday 9 June 13:00:00 UTC 2016

Never again confuse crudo and carpaccio. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Some men choke their chickens after a woman refuses their Facebook advances. This guy choked her chickens [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 12:57:35 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Eviction arrived before second coming

Thursday 9 June 12:55:38 UTC 2016

Grannis, Arkansas: On September 29, 1975, the Nance family — about 40 of them in all — stopped paying all their bills (including their mortgage) because they were sure the Second Coming was about to happen. They knew this because Aunt Iola Walker had received a message from God. Ten months later, U.S. marshals evicted them, and the family members … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Want 'Chewbacca Mom's' autograph? Get ready to pay [Asinine]

Thursday 9 June 12:28:36 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [152 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Bikini Atoll is Still Hot

Thursday 9 June 12:16:39 UTC 2016

Great links for everyone! [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ex delicto electo [Giggity]

Thursday 9 June 12:02:21 UTC 2016

Giggity [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Firefighters in Arizona hoping their effort shields Yarnell, for now remain silent [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 11:42:02 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Old and Busted: Seeing Mary or Jesus on a tree stump. New and Improved: Seeing Donald Trump on the bathroom tile [Amusing]

Thursday 9 June 11:41:05 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [52 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Contest guidelines: 400 words "about the entrant's skills and vision for owning a paid weekly newspaper in the new millennium." Winner gets the newspaper business & historic Main Street building where it has been published for better

Thursday 9 June 11:37:00 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #284

Thursday 9 June 11:29:09 UTC 2016

Reminding me of that old proverb, "If billfolds were neckties, publicists would be geniuses."

Scanned from Good Housekeeping for December 1953. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chimp still loves woman who rescued her from a research lab 25 years ago. Your chimp wants bananas [Sappy]

Thursday 9 June 11:19:43 UTC 2016

Sappy [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending their best. They're bringing drugs, they're bringing crime, they're getting 13 medals and a 4.5 GPA on a full scholarship, but some, I'm sure, are good people [Ironic]

Thursday 9 June 11:13:24 UTC 2016

Ironic [link] [127 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Molly the three-legged pony makes regular visits to schools, nursing homes, cancer camps, rehabilitation centers and children's hospitals, offering people a story of courage. My allergies must be flaring up because right now I'm a little hors

Thursday 9 June 11:04:53 UTC 2016

Sappy [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » You Can Now Use Any Website as a Screensaver

Thursday 9 June 11:00:00 UTC 2016

See what's happening on your favorite site, even while your computer sleeps. [Link]

Mental Floss » Safari Animals

Thursday 9 June 10:45:00 UTC 2016

[Link]

FMyLife » caryl101698 says FML

Thursday 9 June 10:36:47 UTC 2016

Today, after spending $850 on having our siding, roof and windows powerwashed, a 5-minute storm blew the siding clear off the house. FML [Link]

FMyLife » bshoemaker45601 says FML

Thursday 9 June 10:36:46 UTC 2016

Today, I got a job at a casino where I was actually planning on spending my 21st birthday next month. After they hired me, they told me no employees are allowed to play or gamble on or off the clock, for as long as they are employed there, or termination will immediately follow. FML [Link]

FMyLife » codyolimason says FML

Thursday 9 June 10:36:45 UTC 2016

Today, I went to pick my dog up from my old house where my ex-boyfriend still lives. I rang the doorbell and saw him look out of the side window holding the dog. When I told him I was there for my dog, he claimed that the dog was his now. He broke up with me because he hates dogs. … [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Thursday 9 June 10:36:44 UTC 2016

Today, a friend pointed out to me that my girlfriend of 5 years looks a bit like my mom. She does, and I can't get it out of my head. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » San Francisco Barista Creates Adorable Latte Art

Thursday 9 June 10:30:00 UTC 2016

Some of the best latte art out there. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Donald Trump, blogger, circa 1988: "I know Hillary, and I think she would make a great president or vice president" and "Bill Clinton was a great president" [Awkward]

Thursday 9 June 10:19:26 UTC 2016

Awkward [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "It's a bold strategy Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for him." Man caught with over 2700 child porn movies and images blames it on viruses [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 9:47:00 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [54 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » School tells graduate that it's perfectly OK to celebrate her proud native American heritage, as long as she does so alone where nobody can see her [Asinine]

Thursday 9 June 8:42:00 UTC 2016

Asinine [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Founding member of the Minutemen border militia group found guilty of child molestation. Bonus: He represented himself in court because of course he did [Sick]

Thursday 9 June 8:23:00 UTC 2016

Sick [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Original Locations of 15 Famous Chain Stores

Thursday 9 June 8:00:00 UTC 2016

1. Gap // Ocean Ave., San Francisco, California The first Gap opened in 1969 after Donald and Doris Fisher were so fed up with their previous jeans-buying experiences, they decided to get in the game themselves. The merchandise of the original Gap store was comprised of Levi’s and records. While the original is no longer an active clothing store, there … [Link]

GraphJam » Che Guevara T Shirts vs. The People Who Wear Them

Thursday 9 June 7:32:54 UTC 2016

Che Guevara clothing communism Hall of Fame middle class Pie Chart rebels shoot t shirts - 3428826368 Graph by: YourFriendlyNeighborhoodGrammarNazi Tagged: Che Guevara , clothing , communism , Hall of Fame , middle class , Pie Chart , rebels , shoot , t shirts Share on Facebook [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Vendor accidentally shoots himself on MU campus while showing his friend his gun. Missouri law does not allow guns on campus without permission from the institution. Of course there will be no charges [Fail]

Thursday 9 June 7:14:24 UTC 2016

Fail [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » General Mills Announces New Toast-Inspired Cereal

Thursday 9 June 7:00:00 UTC 2016

Pass the milk, please. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Malvin Greston Whitfield, an orphan three-time Olympic gold medalist Tuskegee airman veteran of WWII and Korea, who went on to the foreign service and raised a CNN anchor, has been buried at Arlington. Presumably with his giant brass balls [Hero]

Thursday 9 June 6:22:00 UTC 2016

Hero [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Last Words

Thursday 9 June 6:11:26 UTC 2016

Note found in the pocketbook of an English corporal killed during the battle of the Somme: Dear Mother I am writing these few lines severely wounded. We have done well our Batt. advanced about 3 quarters of a mile. I am laid in a shell hole with 2 wounds in my hip and through my back. I cannot move or … [Link]

Mental Floss » Use This Calculator to Determine the True Cost of Homeownership

Thursday 9 June 6:00:00 UTC 2016

It comes down to more than just your monthly mortgage. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Drinking homemade grappa distilled by someone who doesn't know what is in the dozens of unlabeled bottled around his house might not be the smartest plan you can have, but it could be your last [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 5:01:00 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » An Animated Guide to the Psychology of Self-Esteem

Thursday 9 June 5:00:00 UTC 2016

How successful your parents are influences how good you feel about your own life. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Nature Made" dietary supplements recalled after containing two additional nature made ingredients: Staphylococcus aureus and Salmonella [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 4:37:49 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Real Hobbits once walked the Earth. And walked. And walked. And walked [Interesting]

Thursday 9 June 4:09:03 UTC 2016

Interesting [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 579: "B's" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 9 June 4:01:00 UTC 2016

Farktography [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 18 Play-Along Facts About Shari Lewis and Lamb Chop

Thursday 9 June 4:00:00 UTC 2016

Even if you started singing “The Song That Doesn’t End” not knowing what it was—and will continue singing it forever, just because—there may be a few things you don’t know about the multitalented lady behind Lamb Chop. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » All hopes of finding man who fell into hot spring in Yellowstone have dissolved [Followup]

Thursday 9 June 3:55:11 UTC 2016

Followup [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How the Rat Pack Got Its Name

Thursday 9 June 3:30:00 UTC 2016

The phrase didn’t originally refer to the group of guys most people think it does—and actually, it wasn’t even a group of all guys. [Link]

Mental Floss » WWI Centennial: Germans Capture Fort Vaux

Thursday 9 June 3:19:47 UTC 2016

Erik Sass is covering the events of the war exactly 100 years after they happened. This is the 239th installment in the series. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Iranian soccer player suspended for six months for wearing SpongeBob ShortPants shorts. He must have been showing his genius [Stupid]

Thursday 9 June 3:12:55 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Hangover Maids Clean Up After Parties (And Bring Fast Food)

Thursday 9 June 3:00:00 UTC 2016

Have someone else deal with the aftermath of your fun while you rest. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Never get in a land war in Asia, never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line, and never, ever go against a mom in tug of war [Florida]

Thursday 9 June 2:38:50 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Leave it to the Japanese to make urinals a wee bit more entertaining [Amusing]

Thursday 9 June 2:37:54 UTC 2016

Amusing [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Take an Up-Close Look at the Daniel Radcliffe Doll from 'Swiss Army Man'

Thursday 9 June 2:30:00 UTC 2016

It really, truly, unnervingly looks like Radcliffe—and you can soon see the doll in a city near you. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » GOP announces interactive website allowing public to participate in crafting their 2016 platform. Unfortunately, Weedlord Bonerhitler seems to have crashed it already [Stupid]

Thursday 9 June 2:09:51 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [148 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Quirky Bird Feeders

Thursday 9 June 1:46:54 UTC 2016

Be a good host to your feathered friends. [Link]

Mental Floss » The Average Cost of One-Bedroom Apartments in 50 Major U.S. Cities

Thursday 9 June 1:30:00 UTC 2016

See how drastically rent prices can vary depending on where you choose to live. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canada elects a Liberal government and the next thing you know, their capital city is devoured by a giant sinkhole [Strange]

Thursday 9 June 1:29:55 UTC 2016

Strange [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Raptors fan ejected from playoff game shot and killed in Toronto. Wow, that's strict security [Scary]

Thursday 9 June 1:21:54 UTC 2016

Scary [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » MASTURBATE FURIOUSL-oh, wait [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 1:21:32 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [71 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Baseball's Golden Ticket: The MLB Lifetime Pass

Thursday 9 June 1:15:00 UTC 2016

If you'd use it, you'll probably never be one of the people who gets it. (And in some cases, you wouldn't want to be.) [Link]

Mental Floss » London's Tribute to Tragic Tales of 'Heroic Self-Sacrifice'

Thursday 9 June 1:00:00 UTC 2016

Postman's Park is small, but it commemorates huge heroic deeds. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you're going to dine and dash, don't leave behind anything which could identify you. Like your 10 year old daughter [Dumbass]

Thursday 9 June 0:55:54 UTC 2016

Dumbass [link] [31 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Chumpee says FML

Thursday 9 June 0:48:36 UTC 2016

Today, after years busting my hump for my father's business with the understanding of one day taking it over, he informed me that my nephew, who has never shown any interest in the company, is being brought in to take it over. FML [Link]

FMyLife » TPelekakis says FML

Thursday 9 June 0:48:35 UTC 2016

Today, I lost the 5 pounds I had gained over the last few weeks. I had vowed to do whatever it took to lose that weight, and I actually did, when I caught a horrible stomach bug. I'd eat my words, but I'm pretty sure I'd just end up throwing them up. FML [Link]

FMyLife » happiestturtle says FML

Thursday 9 June 0:48:34 UTC 2016

Today, my mom thought the best way to stop me from taking people to my room was by changing my wallpaper into a nursery-themed one. Now I get to see bunnies, letter blocks and teddy bears all day long. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » NJ photographer recreates 'The Walking Dead' scenes with children under 7. Resulting backlash is more interesting than the show [Silly]

Thursday 9 June 0:38:52 UTC 2016

Silly [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » As relationships improve between the US and Cuba, St. Petersburg Yacht Club brings back the Havana race. For the first time since 1959, boats are racing TO Cuba [Cool]

Thursday 9 June 0:38:18 UTC 2016

Cool [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Marijuana growers blamed for house fire on High Street. High Street? You bet it was [Stupid]

Thursday 9 June 0:36:52 UTC 2016

Stupid [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Do the Alaska Bush People live in a resort lodge while filming? That's like asking "Is Reality TV scripted?" [Obvious]

Thursday 9 June 0:30:50 UTC 2016

Obvious [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Introducing ‘Broomgate,’ the Latest Controversy to Hit Professional Curling

Thursday 9 June 0:30:00 UTC 2016

A new line of high-tech brooms is leaving many cold. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Boy, 7, splashes pool water near female guest at Florida resort. So woman grabs her bottle of vodka and pours it "directly into the eyes and face" of youngster [Florida]

Thursday 9 June 0:16:54 UTC 2016

Florida [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this mesmerizing metronome [Photoshop]

Thursday 9 June 0:00:01 UTC 2016

Photoshop [link] [25 comments] [Link]

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