Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my sister got me in deep trouble at the store I worked security for. She "dropped by to say hi" and stole a bunch of things when I wasn't looking. I wasn't arrested, due to lack of any evidence. But my boss didn't care about evidence and fired me anyway. FML [Link]
FMyLife » GreenShelves says FML
Today, after staying up late all week to get work done, I arrived at my job having accomplished all my goals. In my sleep-deprived stupor, I completely forgot to bring the briefcase that had all of the evidence of that hard work. FML [Link]
FMyLife » John_Elvis says FML
Today, I took a girl to a sushi restaurant for our first date. She insisted she's had sushi before, but I had to watch her struggle with the chopsticks for a few minutes before mercifully asking the waitress for a fork. She then ate a fork full of wasabi, thinking it was guacamole. I think there won't be a second … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Two ugly-ass white tiger cubs are born at theme park. Welcome to Earth, Titan and Apollo [Spiffy]
[link] [18 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Young woman punched in the face for no apparent reason by man in the park. With helpful picture of the park in the early 1930s [Scary]
[link] [43 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 1,200 participants successfully break world record in a game of 'human mattress dominoes.' Yes, there is a video [Silly]
[link] [16 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » One-week-old ugly-ass tiger cubs make their debut at Chinese zoo [Sappy]
[link] [16 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Intense Facts About ‘Hostel’
Eli Roth’s intense horror film, which helped revitalize the “torture porn” genre, was a commercial success. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You may think you're a badass, but are you a 70-year-old, cane-wielding, chased-off-a-robber at-Waffle-House badass? [Hero]
[link] [37 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » School children launched a stuffed animal into space. It's basically become Sandra Bullock in 'Gravity' (Some Not safe for work images in sidebar) [Interesting]
[link] [58 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In defense of pretension [Interesting]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » B-52's join the fight against ISIS, bringing a New Wave in the allied offense [Interesting]
[link] [134 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Houston, we have a problem [Scary]
[link] [59 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You know who else liked to seize territory? [Ironic]
[link] [57 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Starbucks barista offends customer with accurate prediction [Amusing]
[link] [131 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » You Can Eat Avocado Seeds (But It’s Unclear Whether You Should)
Avocado seeds are getting a lot of attention these days, but are they actually worth the trouble? [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Challenge: Get jiggy with this puzzle piece [Photoshop]
[link] [31 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » A 4-year-old saved his mom's life by unlocking her cellphone and calling for help, is now planning to put Kindergarten on hold while he considers offers made by both Apple and the FBI [Spiffy]
[link] [24 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Facebook campaign underway to get female tourists to take off their clothes and post pictures of it [Giggity]
[link] [67 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » I was wondering if I'd be able to get a pic of that plane landing when suddenly it hit me [Dumbass]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Stop me if you have heard this one before. Apple and the Justice Department are locked in a battle over unlocking an iPhone [Facepalm]
[link] [60 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, while hiking alone for the first time, I had to take a leak. I ended up wiping with what turned out to be a poison ivy leaf. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Overweight dog loses half his body weight. Goes from chunky to hunky [Spiffy]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "I'm scared on top of this utility pole. I'm going to puma pants" [Strange]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fark Store Daily Deal: iSafe Drive 64GB. Thumb drive for backing up your iPhone and expanding your iPhone storage. I need this yesterday. (Sponsored Link) [Plug]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Sorry, Crocodile Dundee, but if you want a REAL knife, you have to come to Texas [Amusing]
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » This Skin-Sensitive Camisole Was Designed for Breast Cancer Patients
Radiation oncologist Katie Deming was determined to make radiation treatment less painful for breast cancer patients. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Use the forms, Luke [Silly]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Want to cut your risk for diabetes or obesity? Simple: drink the good stuff, not that 2%, 1%, or (god forbid) skim crap [Interesting]
[link] [146 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Best Amazon Deals We Could Find Today, April 9
As a recurring feature, our team combs the Web and shares some amazing Amazon deals we’ve turned up. Here’s what caught our eye today, April 9. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You know that Facebook post that claims you can pay your income taxes in cash at the nearest 7-Eleven? Yeah, about that…wait, you mean it's true? Really? [Strange]
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Oh hi, thanks for using our sperm bank to conceive your child. Turns out that donor wasn't the PhD candidate we advertised, he was a career criminal with schizophrenia. We good? Kthxbye" [Followup]
[link] [122 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 12 Fib-Free Facts About 'Pinocchio'
Earlier incarnations of the beloved marionette had him cracking wise, and getting handsy with the Blue Fairy. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you're drinking and driving, just go home and sleep it off. Don't set up a fake DUI checkpoint along the highway [Dumbass]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Tractor Flees Burning Barn
Several years ago we got to hear Paul talk about the theory of resistentialism — this being the theory that inanimate objects can display spiteful behavior toward people.
This 1970 story seems to be related to that concept, as it demonstrates another form of purposeful behavior exhibited by an inanimate object — in this case, a will to survive.
The Louisville … [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Wanna Borrow the Kneepads in My Desk?
Owner: Have you proposed to her yet? When are you gonna propose to that girl? You're not getting a bonus, a raise, or a review until you get down on your knees.
Employee: (smirks)
Owner: For her! Rogers, Arkansas [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Italian foodies unimpressed by inflammatory French video demonstrating one-pot recipe for pasta alla carbonara with creme fraiche and onion. "We're open to all kinds of variations on the carbonara, but this goes too far…désolé"
[link] [70 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » minissaussette says FML
Today, my 4-year-old brother has a very strict 8:30 PM bedtime. Since I would have to walk past his door to get to the rest of the house, I'm not allowed to leave my room past that time, lest I tempt him to get up too. I can't even go to the bathroom. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anon says FML
Today, I proudly told my family I lost 15 pounds. My dad looked me up and down and said, "Well, you've got a looooong way to go." FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Colorado's proposed universal healthcare organization would rank 80th on the Fortune 500 list if it were a private company. Revenues would surpass state budget by over $16 billion [Interesting]
[link] [105 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The USPS is adjusting the postal rate yet again … downward? Wait, what? [Weird]
[link] [101 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Flying a Trump flag in front of your home in New Jersey? Yeah, that's a jailing [Asinine]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this buffalo soldier [Photoshop]
[link] [17 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Because it's not everyday that a kitty jumps straight into your van engine as you're going down a busy London street, let's give a hats-off to this fire brigade for rescuing this frightened little guy in just three hours after ripping the
[link] [481 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Adjust the Lighting of These Portraits By Moving Your Cursor
This art project from Microsoft brings still photos to life. [Link]
Mental Floss » Learn to Make a Paper Airplane With a World Record Holder
“The paper airplane you folded in middle school—horrible design.” Ouch, John Collins. [Link]
GraphJam » What I'm Looking Forward to the Most In HP-DH Pt. 2
Graph by: abkneal Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » The Blackest of Fridays
Graph by: (via Brads Deals) Tagged: black , black friday , FRIDAY , infographic , shopping Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Obvi
Graph by: (via I Love Charts) Tagged: Line Graph , math , nerd , proof Share on Facebook
[Link]
Weird Universe » Hat Styles From the Kitchen
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » VP of Jet Pack International critically injured after falling 10 feet during demo at Go Fast energy drink company [Scary]
[link] [82 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Watch Marbles Race (With Pro Commentary)
Watching marbles "race" is surprisingly exciting. [Link]
FMyLife » piss off says FML
Today, a customer at the fast-food joint I work at gave me a pitying look and asked "How's that liberal arts degree treating ya?" FML [Link]
Mental Floss » In Honor of Obscura Day, Get Off the Couch and Explore
Why not visit an underground cave, historic cemetery, or troll museum? [Link]
Futility Closet » Moving Constants
If you mark two points on a circle, A and B, and a third point T, then angle ATB remains constant as T moves along the segment between A and B. (If you mark a point S in the circle’s other segment then you get another constant angle, ASB, and ASB = 180 – ATB.) If two circles intersect at … [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my 12 and 14 year olds told me they'll be doing whatever they like from now on and there will be no rules or bedtime, otherwise they'll tell their teachers that my husband and I abuse them. Where did I go wrong? FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I asked a customer for a number we could call her at to let her know when we'd finished fixing her PC. I'm so desperately lonely that when she wrote it down for me, I got a raging boner. FML [Link]
The Onion » Clinton Campaign Treasurer Crushed To Death After Stack Of Campaign Funds Topples Over
NEW YORK—Confirming the accident occurred while transferring a new load of cash into Hillary Clinton’s campaign finance warehouse, sources reported that Hillary for America treasurer Jose Villarreal was crushed to death Friday after a stack of campaign funds toppled over onto him. “We are deeply saddened to report that our friend and colleague Jose Villarreal was killed instantly this morning … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Need to cure your sugar addiction? Take up smoking [PSA]
[link] [74 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Watch This Flamethrower Set the Sky Ablaze in 4K Slow Motion
YouTube's The Slow Mo Guys take on 50-foot walls of fire. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » NC congressman thinks the person standing up for gay people is a bully, rather than the people passing anti-LGBT laws [Followup]
[link] [386 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Some 'Simpsons' Fans Are Petitioning to Make Lisa a Vegan
The beloved character's vegetarian lifestyle just isn't enough for some people. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Japan invents the salad cake: all the spongy texture of a cake, all the great flavor and vegetable-based nutrition of a salad. We shall call it….sake! No wait [Weird]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Former Navy SEAL who killed bin Laden never has to buy a drink again…but he does have to face the consequences for DUI [Dumbass]
[link] [67 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Red Deer Likely Got a Boat Ride to the Scottish Isles 5000 Years Ago
Neolithic humans may have transported the red deer from central Europe, which would make them far better seafarers than previously believed. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Castaways learn a valuable lesson because they'd watched Gilligan's Island all those years ago [Hero]
[link] [65 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Mother-Daughter Team Makes Impossibly Intricate Cookie Masterpieces
So detailed they hardly look real. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In annual tradition, over 100 Tokyo cherry blossom viewers rushed to hospital for acute alcohol intoxication [Obvious]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » New sign for Civil War veterans buried in Billings cemetery. Personally I think displaying the sign would have been a better choice [Cool]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » THIS is how you Sonic [Strange]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » can you read? says FML
Today, I got a ticket for driving without insurance. I gave the cop my insurance information, but he said it was invalid because it didn't show an expiration date. When I pointed out the information he was looking for, he ignored me and gave me a ticket anyway. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Belle says FML
Today, all of the long hours I've spent rehearsing paid off because tonight I'll be the lead at the opening show of my school musical. This is a dream come true. Too bad I just got bronchitis. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » These Biodegradable Water Bottles Are Made From Algae
This is one disposable bottle you wouldn't have to feel guilty about using. [Link]
Mental Floss » Take a 360-Degree Virtual Look Inside India's Golden Temple
This interactive video places you in the middle of the important religious site. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cost of liver disease medication jumps from $400 a month to $40,000 a month. Martin Shkreli unavailable for comment [Sick]
[link] [143 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » This App-Controlled Couch May Be the Ultimate Piece of Customizable Furniture
The Lift-Bit is a piece of customizable furniture whose only limits are your imagination. [Link]
Mental Floss » Dumb, Nosy People Plug in Random Found USB Drives, Study Shows
A new study sheds light on how often people risk their cybersecurity for the sake of altruism (or curiosity). [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Buzzfeed is now officially the Gallagher of news media [Stupid]
[link] [52 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » New Study Suggests That Retail Therapy Is Real—If You Buy the Right Things
Money may be able to buy happiness after all. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The Falcon has landed [Cool]
[link] [108 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Archbishop of Canterbury learns he is a bastard [Interesting]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this blackhawk [Photoshop]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Enter a Competition to Spend a Night in Hamlet's Castle
Royal ghosts and revenge plots not included. [Link]
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