Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
Mental Floss » 15 Pretty, Pretty Good Facts About ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’
Larry David’s improvised HBO series was pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Flatulent fatso furious for firing, fights former firm for flippant frustrating failure to forget fault-free farts, feces flare-ups. FFS [Fail]
[link] [84 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Man of Steal [Dumbass]
[link] [14 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I overheard my crazy grandma talking about how she wished someone would kill her, just so she wouldn't have to live with the "shame" of being related to me any more. All because I teach a college-level evolution course. FML [Link]
FMyLife » wormiformed says FML
Today, I had an emergency appendectomy, so I texted my boss to let him know about the situation. He replied that it'd be good for my continued employment prospects if I come into work tomorrow. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » How Do Plants Grow in Space?
When a weed tries to take root in zero gravity, interesting things start to happen. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » What should you do on your scooter after running a red light and almost causing a crash with a car? Dance on the top of their car of course [Weird]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Tie-dye hair is the next big thing and… no, no it isn't [Stupid]
[link] [68 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » It's time to take up a collection for Warren Buffett, who's no longer the richest man in America [Sad]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this plain tour [Photoshop]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "The thief was efficient, professional, highly polished" [Strange]
[link] [16 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cities throughout Colorado drop enforcement of panhandling bans after federal judge rules that simply asking for help is protected speech; just don't be a jerk about it [Spiffy]
[link] [136 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Melt-In-Your-Mouth Facts About M
Do you remember the time when there were no red M&M's? [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Lazy researchers at Chapman Unviersity "prove" that taller, thinner people have more sex [Obvious]
[link] [70 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » NothowIimaginedmyday says FML
Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML [Link]
FMyLife » TordNorski says FML
Today, I started a new job at a family owned business. About ten minutes in to training, the mother and father started an argument that ended in each of them storming off, demanding a divorce. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Three siblings arrested after assault with a hot dog. There are no clear wieners in this case [Dumbass]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Home owners living near O'Hare Airport sue Chicago because it's too noisy. Air pollution, traffic still presumably okay [Facepalm]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Beard Transplants
Beard transplants (yeah apparently that's a thing) are on the rise as men increasingly go for that 'masculine look'. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Walking your dog at a car show? That's a night in the slammer [Asinine]
[link] [72 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When I first came here, this was all sandy beach. Everyone said I was daft to build a McMansion on a sandy beach, but I built it all the same, just to show them. It sank into bay. So I built a second one. That sank into the bay [Obvious]
[link] [61 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Reminder
This website is supported mostly by readers’ donations. You can help by pledging a monthly contribution to our Patreon campaign. You choose the amount to contribute, and you can change or cancel your pledge at any time. In return we offer bonus posts and other rewards — see the page for details. If you prefer, there’s a separate Patreon campaign, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Juror: Your Honor, I need to be excused from jury duty. Judge: On what grounds? Juror: I'm going to miss the ball game. Judge: Permission granted [Amusing]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Ring bearer, flower girl tie the knot 17 years later. In the same church [Sappy]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The new ICD-10 medical codes can be pretty specific, like a V91.07X: Burn due to water skis on fire and W61.42XA which is used for someone struck by a turkey, which is not to be confused with a W61.62X, which is to be used for duck strikes [Stupid]
[link] [136 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Giant spiders are fighting and eating one another in Britain in a long war of attrition, and the battle is happening inside everyone's homes. Why, there could be thousands of spiders fighting in your crawlspace and cupboards RIGHT NOW [Creepy]
[link] [72 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » To dump or not to dump all of your photos of your ex after you dump them? That is the question [Interesting]
[link] [122 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You global warming people need to CHILL out, Earth's natural coolant could be TWICE as powerful as scientists previously believed [Interesting]
[link] [195 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Couple's wedding favors were explosive…ly popular. Just dynamite. They could really blow up…on Etsy [Stupid]
[link] [18 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Ten-year-old boy leads blind deer to grass patches every day before school to make sure it has enough to eat [Sappy]
[link] [51 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Today's data breach involving 4.65 million customers comes to you compliments of Scottrade [Fail]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » #16: We're all arrogant [Asinine]
[link] [154 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Have Known About 'Growing Pains'
The Seavers entered the American pop culture mainstream 30 years ago. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When they're not busy waging Jihad or beheading infidels, ISIS finds time to run two theme park attractions [Strange]
[link] [53 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Philadelphia marijuana decriminalization one year later: "The sky has remained in place. No one has tried to turn the Liberty Bell into a bong. Yet" [Spiffy]
[link] [53 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » scarredforlife says FML
Today, after taking my little niece out onto the balcony of her family's new apartment to enjoy the view, we watched as a man jay-walked across the street down below and was run over by a car. My niece is pretty much traumatized for life now. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » US airstrike in Kunduz accidentally bombs the heck out of a medical facility, collaterally damaging members of Doctors Without Borders. Whoopsiedoodles [Awkward]
[link] [175 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Feds argue that a search warrant is good for your entire hard drive, not just what they said they were looking for. Ghost of Thomas Jefferson cries [Murica]
[link] [95 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Attention people bad at math: Powerball is changing their odds [Unlikely]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » OK, which of you Farkers has $96,000 less in the bank today? [Giggity]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this meteorite that proves the Moon & the Earth got it on [Photoshop]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Listen up kids, this is what the internet looked like before it was a series of tubes. You don't want to know what the Fark drawer looked like [Strange]
[link] [51 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Wrong Date
Leroy Irwin, a 92-year-old farmer living in Allegan, Michigan, decided to have the dates of his life carved on his gravestone before he died, because (having no children) he wasn't sure who would pay to do it after he died.
He carved the dates 1856-1950, but it turned out he was a little too optimistic. He died in November 1949, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » College towns with the best burgers. Hold the mayo [Amusing]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cassidy, the two-legged kitten, born on the streets and surviving nine weeks alone in a forest, tries out his new wheelchair – just in time for Caturday [Caturday]
[link] [554 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » What Japanese People Thought Westerners Looked Like in 1860
The artists who created Yokohama-e often used Western newspapers as their source material. [Link]
Weird Universe » Isa Leal at Labbodies
How can we ever honestly tell a young child again that it is wrong to play inside plastic bags? [Link]
FMyLife » illuminatzi says FML
Today, I was running late for work. I forgot my name tag and work hat at home, but my boss is pretty laid back, so I wasn't worried about it. Five minutes into my shift, the district supervisor walked in for a surprise employee inspection. FML [Link]
GraphJam » CHANCES I'LL CATCH MY TYPOS
Graph by: dogheadbuttchow Tagged: Bar Graph , careful , catch , nanosecond , proofreading , save , typos Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » So, Who's Next, Chewbacca?
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bad guys , beard , bin Laden , enemy , facial hair , Line Graph Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Toys 'R' Alive?
Graph by: CodySimpsonToronto Tagged: buying things , dont-stop , Music , Pie Chart , run , store , toys Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Temperature of Bathwater
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Bar Graph , bathtub , burn , clean , relax , scorch Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » She Always Cares
Graph by: cincy_rob Tagged: dead , gf , girlfriend , i dont care , Pie Chart Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Your Beautiful Eyes
Graph by: stugil Tagged: Awkward , food , Pie Chart , sexytimes , thinking Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Irony
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: church , ironic , Pie Chart , religion Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » American Map According to Europeans
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: americans , bigger , europeans , idiots , infographic , Maps , texans Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Classic: It'd Take a Lot Less to Scare Me to Death
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: best of week , Euthanasia Coaster , roller coaster , scary Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Sporange!
Graph by: hamsterlove Tagged: orange , Pie Chart , rhyming , words Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » Things that are in Russia, according to non-Russians
Graph by: RedCray0n Tagged: bears , commies , nukes , russia , russians , unicycle , vodka Share on Facebook
[Link]
GraphJam » And TV Makes It Look so Relaxing
Graph by: S.P.A-Bits (via Bite) Tagged: bathing , bathtub , bored , stages , TV Share on Facebook
[Link]
Mental Floss » Trippy William Shatner Songs
"Captain Kirk is climbing a mountain—why is he climbing a mountain?" Answer: "To hug the mountain." [Link]
Mental Floss » Why Cheese Mold is Rapidly Evolving—And What That Means For Cheese Lovers
Scientists have found that cheese mold is in evolutionary overdrive. [Link]
Futility Closet » Worldly Wise
Proverbs from around the world: A pretty basket does not prevent worries. (Congo) Good painters need not give a name to their pictures; bad ones must. (Poland) Sickness comes riding on horseback and goes away on foot. (Belgium) The spectator is a great hero. (Afghanistan) Those who have to go ten miles must regard nine as only halfway. (Germany) The … [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my parents pranked me hard. They spent breakfast messing with my head, all to convince me that I was dreaming. I got so excited at finally having a lucid dream that I ran outside in my pajamas, yelling "Woo-hoo!" and trying to fly. Nothing happened. People saw. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » A Beer Bong for Champagne Drinkers
Why sip champagne when you can shoot it? [Link]
FMyLife » FML says FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to dinner to meet my parents. He agreed to be on his best behavior, but when my mom told us about some shady stuff going on at her job, he replied that it sounded "fishier than Justin Bieber's cunt." We were quickly kicked out. FML [Link]
FMyLife » sad-boing says FML
Today, my hormones are so screwed, I popped a boner at the sight of two grasshoppers mating and had to retire to my room for a wank. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Weird, Rare Accidents With Their Own Medical Codes
Crashed your spacecraft? The hospital knows exactly how to bill for that. [Link]
Mental Floss » Performance Artist Tony Orrico Makes Art by Chewing
Tony Orrico's preferred tools of the art-making trade are his very own chompers. [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Crunchy Facts About Fritos
Salty, crunchy, and the perfect companion for everything from chili to sandwiches, Fritos are a stalwart of the chip aisle. But how much do you really know about their story and their spicy international travels? [Link]
Mental Floss » New Trend: Beard Transplants
Can't grow a beard? Get a transplant. [Link]
Mental Floss » 7 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Rats
We used to think rats were gross. Now we think they’re gross and fascinating! [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Reasons Physical Books Might Be Better Than E-Books
Studies have shown that if you want to really remember something, it's easier to do with paper. [Link]
Mental Floss » Bronze-Age Brits May Have Mummified Their Dead
Scientists use modern technology to get a glimpse of prehistory. [Link]
FMyLife » Catlover234 says FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute after I got into the front seat of an elderly man's car. The man was my grandfather, and he was taking me to a doctor's appointment, since I wasn't going to be allowed to drive home after it. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I found a baby squirrel on the pavement and thought I'd try and rescue it. While I googled what to do, it started running around. I tried to grab it, but it ran straight into the path of a car. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » Tree Trunks Find Second Life in Mind-Bending Artwork
New York-based artist Jason Middlebrook paints on discarded wood and found natural materials to create intricate works of art that can be hung on the wall. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Tornado in Laurel, MD confirmed, downgraded from extra aggressive lane change [Scary]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Drunk man befriends chicken, entices it to commit cannibalism [Dumbass]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop theme: Design an ad for the 2050 automotive model year [Photoshop]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Science Behind Why You Don't Think Your Friend's Boyfriend Is Cute
Turns out, our individual experiences shape how we perceive physical attractiveness. [Link]
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