John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Dr. Peter Johnson, OBGYN, has license suspended for sexual addiction after getting way too deep into his job [Weeners]

Thursday 17 September 23:34:34 UTC 2015

Weeners [link] [102 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » This Elegant Pavilion Is Made Of 10,000 Recycled BIC Pens

Thursday 17 September 23:30:00 UTC 2015

You'd never know this gorgeous crystalline netting was made of an everyday office supply. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Red Bull gives you WIIINGS…and 8-10 years for kidnapping [Weird]

Thursday 17 September 23:23:47 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Russian satellites to be launched into space on board Satan [Interesting]

Thursday 17 September 23:16:13 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » These 3D Printable Habitats Were Designed for Life on Mars

Thursday 17 September 23:15:00 UTC 2015

Here are the finalists of NASA's 3D printable design contest. [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Thursday 17 September 23:09:18 UTC 2015

Today, I went to visit my senile grandma, since she's ill and nobody else in the family visits her. I ended up having to sit through a long rant about the Illuminati, black people, and how we'd have a cure for the common cold already if it weren't for "those god damned foreigners". FML [Link]

FMyLife » TheNewGuy03 says FML

Thursday 17 September 23:09:17 UTC 2015

Today, while playing with a group of kids at the school where I work, I heard an immense rip. I looked down and recoiled in shock as I noticed a gaping maw in my pants stretching from my ass to my left kneecap. I had to finish the rest of the day and walk home like that. FML [Link]

FMyLife » mother teresa was a cunt says FML

Thursday 17 September 23:09:16 UTC 2015

Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Whovians Beware: Daleks are Invading London Metro Stations

Thursday 17 September 23:00:00 UTC 2015

Their appearance coincides with the season nine premiere of 'Doctor Who.' [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chicken struck by car, reasons for crossing road undetermined [Obvious]

Thursday 17 September 22:50:43 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Can you hear me now? Hello? Is this thing on?" [Fail]

Thursday 17 September 22:36:46 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Whataburger employee learns Whataifiring is after jokingly refusing to serve two cops [Facepalm]

Thursday 17 September 22:31:08 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [146 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Bloodthirsty Facts About 'Little Shop of Horrors'

Thursday 17 September 22:30:00 UTC 2015

At first, the horrifically hilarious musical remake wasn't a huge hit. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Gross AL judge wants to have special privileges to defy SCOTUS and not issue "license to commit sodomy" [Stupid]

Thursday 17 September 22:26:34 UTC 2015

Stupid [link] [154 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » New Study Reveals How Brushing Your Teeth Helps Keep Your Heart Healthy

Thursday 17 September 22:00:00 UTC 2015

New research clarifies how bacteria in our mouths may lead to cardiovascular health problems. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guantanamo Bay prisoner has a dating profile on Match.com. Apparently he switched over after getting very little response on Terroristmingle.com [Weird]

Thursday 17 September 21:51:44 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » After a shoot-out, the uncle is dead and at the coroner, the nephew is shot and in the ICU, and the rooster is unharmed and tied to a chair [Murica]

Thursday 17 September 21:41:47 UTC 2015

Murica [link] [51 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Sportsgraphic: Strongside/Weakside: Marcus Mariota

Thursday 17 September 21:30:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Mental Floss » These House-Themed ‘Harry Potter’ Covers Are Gorgeous

Thursday 17 September 21:20:52 UTC 2015

Embrace you're inner (insert Hogwarts house here) with these customized book covers. [Link]

Mental Floss » 'Mother' Robot Builds Better, Faster Robot Offspring

Thursday 17 September 21:20:51 UTC 2015

In case artificially intelligent robots weren’t terrifying enough. [Link]

Mental Floss » Make Cat-Shaped Eggs With This Cool Mold

Thursday 17 September 21:20:50 UTC 2015

Move aside Mickey Mouse-shaped pancakes, cat eggs are here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Follow up on our earlier thread with homegrown items for your table.. how did your green thumb work out for the season? What did you make with your own gardening results? Show us the goods and what we missed out on [Followup]

Thursday 17 September 21:00:00 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [147 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Pepsi

Thursday 17 September 21:00:00 UTC 2015

Quench your thirst with these fun facts about the popular soft drink and the company that makes it. [Link]

Mental Floss » The Missing Links: NASA's Zero Gravity Research Facility

Thursday 17 September 20:30:00 UTC 2015

Take a look inside NASA’s Zero Gravity Research Facility. * Facebook may be adding a "dislike" button, but Conan has a list of suggestions for other buttons they should add. * Check out a stunt driver completing a full loop up and down a vertical ring. * Intriguing Headline of the Day: Why Can’t We Get Rid of the 7-Day … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's hard to teach a one year old to use an inhaler. Especially if it's an otter [Interesting]

Thursday 17 September 20:28:09 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Good fences make good neighbors, or at least keep them from sawing your outhouse in half [Strange]

Thursday 17 September 20:26:53 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [14 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You gotta admit, at least the "your honor, I can't be the pedophile who's flashing children because my Pennsylvania is too small to take out in public" defense is an original one [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 September 20:26:16 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pensioner blames funny smell in apartment on next door's obsession with home hygiene. Turns out to be crack cocaine [Obvious]

Thursday 17 September 20:23:39 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Has the jury reached a verdict?" "Yes, your honor. We find the defendant bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy" [Misc]

Thursday 17 September 20:14:52 UTC 2015

Misc [link] [59 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » First look at the new T-X training dildo being built for the US Air Force [Strange]

Thursday 17 September 20:00:44 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this glitz & glam [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 September 20:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Who was Granny Smith?

Thursday 17 September 20:00:00 UTC 2015

There really was a woman behind the tart varietal. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » American Airlines grounds flights nationwide to fix computer issue. Probably just discovered their Windows 95 software can't handle 3-digit baggage fees [Interesting]

Thursday 17 September 19:58:42 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bar serves cocktails containing liquid nitrogen because it produces a "dramatic effect" — specifically, causing a woman's stomach to explode [Followup]

Thursday 17 September 19:56:45 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [63 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Study Finds Harshly Criticizing U.S. Education System Only Causing It To Fall Further Behind Peers

Thursday 17 September 19:47:00 UTC 2015

PALO ALTO, CA—Explaining that even the most well-meaning criticism can lead to adverse repercussions, a study released Thursday by researchers at Stanford University has found that berating the U.S. education system has only caused it to fall further behind its international peers. “We often feel compelled to point out flaws and shortcomings when we’re trying to help our nation achieve … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The best part of waking up turns out not to be Meth in your coffee cup [Sick]

Thursday 17 September 19:43:26 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "It's a good thing I have my 'smart' phone because otherwise I couldn't call you to help get me and my BMW out of this lake" [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 September 19:41:40 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That sinking feeling you get when a humpback whale jumps onto your kayak [Scary]

Thursday 17 September 19:38:41 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 20 Cognitive Biases That Affect Your Decisions

Thursday 17 September 19:30:00 UTC 2015

You put a lot of thought into every choice that you make … which could be the reason why you’re making bad decisions. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Protip: When attempting to shoplift from Walmart, try not to stab yourself [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 September 19:13:18 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [25 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Obama Invites Arrested Clock-Building Teen To White House

Thursday 17 September 19:09:00 UTC 2015

After being arrested for bringing a homemade clock to school that his teachers mistook for a bomb, Muslim teenager Ahmed Mohamed garnered massive social media support that decried the school for its supposed Islamophobia, leading to an invitation by President Obama for Ahmed to attend the upcoming White House Astronomy Night. What do you think?
[Link]

The Onion » Sports News in Brief: Luke Kuechly Undergoes Quick Brain Arthroscopy To Clean Up Cerebral Cortex

Thursday 17 September 19:06:00 UTC 2015

CHARLOTTE, NC—After suffering a concussion that sidelined him against the Jacksonville Jaguars last weekend, the Carolina Panthers announced Thursday that All-Pro linebacker Luke Kuechly has undergone a quick brain arthroscopy in order to clean up his cerebral cortex. “Earlier today, we successfully scoped Luke’s brain and removed some buildup of tissue that had been accumulating in there,” said team doctor … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mozambique declares critical shortage of landmines [Spiffy]

Thursday 17 September 19:05:01 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Harrowing Facts About 'The Things They Carried'

Thursday 17 September 19:00:00 UTC 2015

This widely read novel about war is more fact than fiction. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police description of boatless woman found 3 miles offshore: "She was completely naked." "She was really far out" [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 18:53:11 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [96 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » When you're slinging rocks at the window of the car next to you, you better make sure that the passenger in that car doesn't pull out their phone camera [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 September 18:49:45 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [41 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: GOP Promotes Carly Fiorina To Male Candidate After Strong Debate Showing

Thursday 17 September 18:45:00 UTC 2015

WASHINGTON—Saying she had proven herself to be a formidable contender worthy of respect, GOP leaders announced Thursday that Carly Fiorina had been officially promoted to a male candidate after her strong showing in last night’s primary debate. “Given her steady rise in the polls and her consistent performance on the national stage, we have determined that Ms. Fiorina’s skills as … [Link]

Mental Floss » The World's Largest Green Roof Might Be on Top of a Silicon Valley Shopping Mall

Thursday 17 September 18:30:00 UTC 2015

A developer is proposing covering Cupertino, Calif.'s Vallco mall with a 30-acre park. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Stanislav, the Kremlin wants to know if the U.S. didn't really launch missiles at us or should they just go ahead and destroy the U.S.?" "Tell them yes on one, no on two." "Which one was yes, go ahead and destroy the U.S. or

Thursday 17 September 18:14:35 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [77 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Studies Show Babies Understand Skype

Thursday 17 September 18:00:00 UTC 2015

Studies show tech savvy babies differentiate between TV and Skype. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Naked Spanish clowns anger Palestinians" (Not safe for work) [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 17:53:26 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pacifist debate in Japanese parliament turns into a brawl. Come on, even subby knows Japan isn't in the Atlantic [Ironic]

Thursday 17 September 17:49:23 UTC 2015

Ironic [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In South Sudan, Mad Max: Fury Road is a documentary [Scary]

Thursday 17 September 17:45:20 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [36 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: 45-Minute Phone Call To Credit Card Company Goes Great

Thursday 17 September 17:44:00 UTC 2015

FORT WAYNE, IN—Grinning with contentment as he reminisced about the call he placed earlier in the day, 31-year-old accountant Greg Schulhoff told reporters Thursday that his 45-minute phone call with MasterCard regarding late payment fees went “really great.” “That was a wonderful experience from beginning to end—just a really nice way to spend an afternoon, you know?” said Schulhoff, remarking … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nobel director now regretting giving prize to the President with the highest drone kill count in history [Followup]

Thursday 17 September 17:39:54 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [130 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Channel Your Inner Jedi at a Singapore Lightsaber Academy

Thursday 17 September 17:30:00 UTC 2015

Because you'll need more than the power of the force if you ever get in a battle with a Sith Lord. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » New coup in Ouagadougou [Interesting]

Thursday 17 September 17:27:03 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cuba, come for the five star hotel, stay for the mist of the "paradise" lawn sprayed with sewage [Sick]

Thursday 17 September 17:19:46 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Munich welcomes refugees, but warns that if they start any scheiß over Oktoberfest and girls in dirndls they'll be put on the next train back to Damascus [Followup]

Thursday 17 September 17:07:06 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 6 of the Least Presidential Words Used in the Second GOP Debate

Thursday 17 September 17:00:00 UTC 2015

Here, courtesy of Vocabulary.com, are six of the least presidential words used in last night’s debate. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A plan to build dozens of six-hundred foot tall wind turbines has divided the town of Yates, NY. Half say they will cause health issues and lower house prices while the others are really big fans [Obvious]

Thursday 17 September 16:56:45 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [97 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A tiny puppy survived a 30-minute cycle in a dryer after being accidentally shut in the machine by a toddler. He's softer and gentler than ever before [Sappy]

Thursday 17 September 16:55:47 UTC 2015

Sappy [link] [38 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Ryoichi says FML

Thursday 17 September 16:54:17 UTC 2015

Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Science proves it. Human stupidity is rubbing off on dogs [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 16:45:50 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [53 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you really want to survive the apocalypse you need a portable Styrofoam igloo that you can wear around your body and plug up the neck hole at night with your hat [Strange]

Thursday 17 September 16:30:33 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Rembrandt Painted a Masterpiece Over a Failed Self Portrait

Thursday 17 September 16:30:00 UTC 2015

Even the masters need a do-over every now and again. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pro tip: If you're going to torch someone's van, stand a little bit further back [Dumbass]

Thursday 17 September 16:17:40 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [19 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Unemployed says FML

Thursday 17 September 16:14:59 UTC 2015

Today, I found out that after three years of telling my boss our strategy wasn't going to work, that I was right – it didn't work. I also found out that because it didn't work, I lost my job. My boss still has his. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pilot diverts a trans-Atlantic flight full of passengers for a single chili dog [Hero]

Thursday 17 September 16:04:02 UTC 2015

Hero [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Robbers steal over $1,000 worth of lottery tickets. Police looking for suspects who are bad at math [Facepalm]

Thursday 17 September 15:52:35 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [18 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What happens when you eat Olive Garden pasta for 7 weeks straight? [Sick]

Thursday 17 September 15:43:32 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [117 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man with pants on head robs store. That's retarded [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 15:42:51 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [24 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Photographer Snaps Pic of a Seal Surfing on a Whale's Back

Thursday 17 September 15:02:02 UTC 2015

It was a classic case of being in the right place at the right time. [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Airplane Parts

Thursday 17 September 15:01:53 UTC 2015

[Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Industrious Facts About Ants

Thursday 17 September 15:01:45 UTC 2015

Though they be but little, they are fierce. (Also: smart, resourceful, and clean.) [Link]

Mental Floss » A 19th-Century Log Cabin Was Discovered Inside a Texas Home's Walls

Thursday 17 September 15:00:00 UTC 2015

The structure is thought to be one of the oldest original buildings in North Texas. [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Top Snake Handler Leaves Sinking Huckabee Campaign

Thursday 17 September 14:40:00 UTC 2015

LITTLE ROCK, AR—Dealing yet another blow to the former Arkansas governor’s presidential hopes, Dalton Hobbs, one of Mike Huckabee’s top snake handlers, has decided to leave the sinking campaign, sources reported Thursday. “This guy was one of the most loyal campaign staffers on the Huckabee team, and no longer being able to rely on his extensive experience with handling poisonous … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Attorney: "There was a language barrier." Client: "I WILL FEAST ON YOUR TESTICLES." Attorney: "The situation deteriorated." Client: "WITH A WHITE WINE SAUCE" [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 14:31:34 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [61 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Critical Facts About 'ER'

Thursday 17 September 14:30:00 UTC 2015

A 20-year-old script from the author of 'Jurassic Park' led to the creation of one of the longest-running dramas in TV history. [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: New Prosthetic Hand Provides Sense Of Touch

Thursday 17 September 14:21:00 UTC 2015

The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency has designed a prosthetic hand that “completes the circuit” to the brain by connecting directly to the motor cortex, affording the wearer a sense of touch unattainable with other prosthetics. What do you think?
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Finally, a criminal that respects gun control laws [Florida]

Thursday 17 September 14:09:23 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [78 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pop quiz, MacGyver: You're in a prison cell with only a blanket and a tube of toothpaste. How do you (almost) escape? [Strange]

Thursday 17 September 14:08:48 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [58 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: College Freshman Decides To Be Lanyard-Wearing Kind

Thursday 17 September 14:06:00 UTC 2015

ANN ARBOR, MI—Emphasizing that this was not a choice he had made lightly, University of Michigan student Kevin Peterson told reporters Thursday that he had officially decided to become one of the lanyard-wearing kind of freshmen. “I have given this matter plenty of thought, weighing the various benefits and drawbacks, and I’ve decided that, henceforth, I will be one of … [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Do Dogs Play Fetch?

Thursday 17 September 14:00:00 UTC 2015

It's in their DNA. [Link]

Weird Universe » Realized he was Jesus

Thursday 17 September 13:37:47 UTC 2015

Here at WU we've explored a number of odd reasons marriages have failed (such as the husband's over-fondness of horse fondling, and a man's dislike of his wife's deformed nipples).

Add to this list Alan John Miller, whose marriage didn't survive his realization that he was Jesus Christ, reincarnated. I can see how that might put a strain on a … [Link]

FMyLife » guest says FML

Thursday 17 September 13:16:59 UTC 2015

Today, I got a text from my ex-boyfriend that said, "I love you." Thinking this meant he'd changed his mind about breaking up with me less than 24 hours before, I replied back excitedly. Turns out that was a text sent last weekend that didn't go through until now. What great timing. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this stage fright [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 September 13:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » See the Web of Undersea Cables That Power the Internet

Thursday 17 September 13:00:00 UTC 2015

How does information on the World Wide Web travel internationally? Under the ocean. [Link]

Mental Floss » Photographer Captures the Beauty of Rest Stops Along American Highways

Thursday 17 September 13:00:00 UTC 2015

Photographer Ryann Ford wants to capture these rest stops before they disappear completely. [Link]

Mental Floss » 19 Cromulent Words You Can Still Adopt for a Good Cause

Thursday 17 September 12:30:00 UTC 2015

Wordnik is an online interactive dictionary with a mission to include every English word—and for $25, you can adopt a word. [Link]

Mental Floss » The First Foldable Smartphone Could Be Coming in January

Thursday 17 September 12:11:21 UTC 2015

Hold the phone: the old school mobile devices may be making a comeback. [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Washington Relinquished His Power, And Why He Returned

Thursday 17 September 12:00:00 UTC 2015

“For Washington,” writes Edward Larson in The Return of George Washington, “retirement made sense.” [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Here is the best hair you will see in a mugshot all day [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 11:52:43 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [46 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » StickyPickles says FML

Thursday 17 September 11:51:45 UTC 2015

Today, I tried the 'Casual Encounter' page on Craigslist. Three hours, a bunch of spam, and a 30-minute call to some company, speaking to some lady I could barely understand to recover the $40 somehow charged to my card. I think I might want to try other ways to meet people. FML [Link]

Weird Universe » Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films

Thursday 17 September 11:48:02 UTC 2015

[Link]

Mental Floss » Airplane Parts

Thursday 17 September 11:45:00 UTC 2015

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Seven moments in the New Testament when Jesus Christ acted like a dick [Strange]

Thursday 17 September 11:33:58 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [200 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Facebook Is Developing Virtual Reality That Lets You Play Ping Pong in Space

Thursday 17 September 11:30:00 UTC 2015

Facebook has been tinkering with virtual reality, and it sounds like they're enjoying themselves. [Link]

Mental Floss » Twisted Cinema: Balloon Recreations of Iconic Movie Scenes

Thursday 17 September 11:00:00 UTC 2015

Rob Driscoll recreates one movie poster or scene a week. [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Where to See Fall Colors

Thursday 17 September 10:00:43 UTC 2015

Fresh, hot links to start your morning right! [Link]

FMyLife » lhazel says FML

Thursday 17 September 9:52:35 UTC 2015

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about what we want to be when we grow up. He said he wanted to be a bartender, and single. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ohio court says ballot measure to legalize weed has to be rewritten because it was like bogus and like misrepresentin and stuff [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 9:10:52 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 7 Mysterious Rock Formations to Rival Stonehenge

Thursday 17 September 9:00:00 UTC 2015

by Jordi Lippe Ancient ruins have fascinated us for years, as they are the only tangible glimpse into the past that gives us an idea of how our ancestors once lived. And with the recent discovery of Superhenge in the United Kingdom, archaeologists have their tongues wagging at the thought of another major piece of the prehistoric puzzle being solved. … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Subby's close friend missing since September 11th, any Scottsdale farkers find her please let us know. We will pay reward money in cash or beer [Sad]

Thursday 17 September 8:50:12 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [68 comments] [Link]

GraphJam » The Knitted Quicker Picker Upper!

Thursday 17 September 8:17:13 UTC 2015

bounty floor paper towel Pie Chart sock spill wipe - 4435656192 Graph by: gadget593 Tagged: bounty , floor , paper towel , Pie Chart , sock , spill , wipe Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Burgers by Location

Thursday 17 September 8:17:11 UTC 2015

Graph by: fdvce Tagged: amusement park , burgers , county fair , fancy , fast food , food , gas station , good , homemade , junk food , tasty Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » That's Why I Dragon Shout Her Out of the Way

Thursday 17 September 8:17:09 UTC 2015

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: dragon shout , elder scrolls , fus ro dah , Pie Chart , Skyrim , swear , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Where socks end up after doing the laundry

Thursday 17 September 8:17:06 UTC 2015

LoL by: MyNameBeStudz Tagged: clothes , laundry , machine , narnia , socks Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Thursday 17 September 8:17:05 UTC 2015

be a man mother nature mulan Pie Chart raging river sexism typhoon - 4063363328 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: be a man , mother nature , mulan , Pie Chart , raging river , sexism , typhoon Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Can't Win

Thursday 17 September 8:17:03 UTC 2015

cant-win Pie Chart school summer think - 6512526592 Submitted by: junkfrp Tagged: cant-win , Pie Chart , school , summer , think Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » M&M Color Distribution

Thursday 17 September 8:16:54 UTC 2015

candy food graphs mms Useless knowledge LoL by: il1019 Tagged: candy , food , graphs , mms , Useless knowledge Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Classmates

Thursday 17 September 8:16:50 UTC 2015

Graph by: Unknown Tagged: class , coffee , jerks , punctuality , school , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Damn, Only a Delay

Thursday 17 September 8:16:44 UTC 2015

Reasons for Checking County Schools' Website Graph by: Unknown Tagged: delay , Pie Chart , school , school cancelled , truancy story Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Angles = Numbers

Thursday 17 September 8:16:43 UTC 2015

Mind = Blown Graph by: Incontroll Tagged: Angles , geometry , math , numbers Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » You Don't Have to Lie; This Is the Internet

Thursday 17 September 8:16:40 UTC 2015

essays faptimes Pie Chart school wrist cramp
Graph by: Unknown Tagged: essays , faptimes , Pie Chart , school , wrist cramp Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Use of Flashlights

Thursday 17 September 8:16:35 UTC 2015

flashlight lightsaber product scary star wars - 1443364096 LoL by: Afterburner Tagged: flashlight , lightsaber , product , scary , star wars Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Hey Bruce

Thursday 17 September 8:16:34 UTC 2015

batman,beatles,lyrics,Songs,theme songs,venn diagram Graph by: Irhaslegendaryswordlol Tagged: batman , beatles , lyrics , Songs , theme songs , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

Mental Floss » Finger Biscuits Cut Out the Middle Man: Your Spoon

Thursday 17 September 8:00:00 UTC 2015

Let's not kid ourselves: we're not spreading Nutella on anything. Finger biscuits let you eat the chocolatey goodness right out of the jar. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The awful life of a McDonald's franchise owner [Sad]

Thursday 17 September 7:41:00 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [220 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Decisions

Thursday 17 September 7:03:11 UTC 2015

Image: Wikimedia Commons A man who enters a public restroom has to make a complex choice quickly. He wants to choose a urinal that maximizes his chances of maintaining privacy — that is, that minimizes the chance that someone will occupy a urinal next to him. Which choice is best? Computer scientists Evangelos Kranakis and Danny Krizanc modeled a number of … [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Of The Most Amazing Items Ringo Starr Put Up For Auction

Thursday 17 September 7:00:00 UTC 2015

Ringo Starr is putting over 800 items up for auction, including various items from his days in the Beatles. [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Shirtless Mike Huckabee Spends Entire Debate Seated In Rickety Rocking Chair

Thursday 17 September 6:06:46 UTC 2015

SIMI VALLEY, CA—Reckoning it was dern near hotter on the stage than a $2 pistol, a shirtless Mike Huckabee reportedly spent the entire Republican primary debate Wednesday seated in a rickety rocking chair. “This economy’s been done ruined on account of President Obama getting too big for his britches and making a whole mess of new laws that feared away … [Link]

Mental Floss » The Brits Made A Giant Yorkshire Pudding Burger for Food Challenges

Thursday 17 September 6:00:00 UTC 2015

Who says Americans are the only ones with crazy-big appetites? [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Climate change isn't bad news for everyone – just look how it's helping arctic mosquitoes [Scary]

Thursday 17 September 5:46:00 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Garbage men refusing to pick up trash because people are putting their trashcan wheels facing the wrong way [Facepalm]

Thursday 17 September 5:44:00 UTC 2015

Facepalm [link] [73 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 541: "Show us your Nerdiness" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]

Thursday 17 September 4:31:00 UTC 2015

Farktography [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The good news is the fish in our oceans have a lot more room to swim than they did 32 years ago, the bad news is our oceans marine life has been cut to almost half since then [Followup]

Thursday 17 September 4:03:28 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Wear Your Favorite Book Around Your Neck

Thursday 17 September 4:00:00 UTC 2015

Everyone has a favorite book that they've read multiple times. To celebrate that special tome, you can have it recreated as a tiny necklace charm. [Link]

FMyLife » Urinator says FML

Thursday 17 September 3:56:26 UTC 2015

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » Quentin Tarantino's 'Pulp Fiction' Wish List Has Been Leaked Online

Thursday 17 September 3:30:00 UTC 2015

John Travolta's comeback was made possible by Michael Madsen. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Edinburgh to Geneva in just one hour by car? Sure it could be done in theory ….and with this rocket propelled car [Cool]

Thursday 17 September 3:24:29 UTC 2015

Cool [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 9 Trees With Spectacular Fall Foliage

Thursday 17 September 3:00:00 UTC 2015

Watch out for these species if you want to see a rainbow of autumn colors. [Link]

Mental Floss » Multitasking Fish Pee Out of Their Intestines

Thursday 17 September 2:30:00 UTC 2015

The stickleback may not look like much, but this little fish is quite the overachiever. [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Does Everyone Else's Skin Feel Softer Than Mine?

Thursday 17 September 2:00:00 UTC 2015

Touching another person’s skin and thinking it’s super soft is an illusion that may help cement social bonds, one study finds. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Animal shelter advertises Live Nude Dogs and Free Lap Dances [Amusing]

Thursday 17 September 1:47:49 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » AI Machine Teaches Itself to Become a Top Chess Player in 72 Hours

Thursday 17 September 1:45:00 UTC 2015

It took 72 hours for the machine to play at the International Master Level. [Link]

Mental Floss » Sleep Like a Celtic Chief in a Replica Iron Age Roundhouse

Thursday 17 September 1:30:00 UTC 2015

The living history hotel is a stone's throw away from an ancient village that's today called Bodrifty [Link]

Mental Floss » Arresting Appearances: 10 Real Prisons Featured in Films

Thursday 17 September 1:00:00 UTC 2015

Why build a fake prison set when you can use the real deal? [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Aides Rush On Stage To Rotate Scott Walker Back To Direction Of Audience

Thursday 17 September 0:36:44 UTC 2015

SIMI VALLEY, CA—Upon noticing that the Wisconsin governor had become disoriented during one of the moderator’s questions and begun delivering his response while facing the set’s backdrop, several of his aides rushed on stage during Wednesday’s GOP primary debate to rotate Scott Walker back in the direction of the audience. “It’s not unusual for him to get a little confused … [Link]

Mental Floss » It Cost $1500 to Make This Sandwich Completely from Scratch

Thursday 17 September 0:30:00 UTC 2015

One man spent six months and $1500 to find out what really goes into making a sandwich from scratch. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Remember the panda cub that died last month? Me neither. In other news, its brother is doing fine [Sappy]

Thursday 17 September 0:28:02 UTC 2015

Sappy [link] [9 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In legal news, KitKat badly whacked, gives the court a bone [Misc]

Thursday 17 September 0:09:56 UTC 2015

Misc [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japanese angler reels in super-sized fish off the coast of Japan near the Fukushima plant and OMG, WTH is that? [Creepy]

Thursday 17 September 0:09:45 UTC 2015

Creepy [link] [88 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you had "54" as the answer to "How many Syrian rebel soldiers can be trained by the U.S. to fight ISIS for $42 million?" claim your prize. Double or nothing offer: "How many are left after 2 months?" a) 54-50, b) 25-20, c)

Thursday 17 September 0:05:42 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [70 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Thursday 17 September 0:02:59 UTC 2015

Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this lone warrior [Photoshop]

Thursday 17 September 0:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Study Finds Up To 14,000 Bed Bugs in Infested Apartments

Thursday 17 September 0:00:00 UTC 2015

A study/horror story followed a bedbug infestation for more than a month to see where the pests went. Answer: Everywhere. [Link]

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