John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

The Onion » Photo Finish: Roger Goodell Vows To Punish Whoever Responsible For Suspending Tom Brady

Monday 11 May 23:24:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 11 May 23:17:43 UTC 2015

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML [Link]

FMyLife » oops says FML

Monday 11 May 23:17:42 UTC 2015

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 11 May 23:17:41 UTC 2015

Today, my girlfriend surprised me with what was allegedly a birthday "cake". It was so horribly deformed, I wasn't sure whether to eat it or wear it as a hat. I had to pretend it didn't taste like play-doh, and ended up throwing it up in the toilet. Happy birthday to me. FML [Link]

Mental Floss » 12 Friendly Facts About Labrador Retrievers

Monday 11 May 23:13:01 UTC 2015

You probably have or know at least one Labrador retriever, so you should get to know them better! [Link]

Mental Floss » Because You've Always Wanted to Pet a Crocodile!

Monday 11 May 23:13:00 UTC 2015

If you love petting zoos, but hate that they're never stocked with crocodiles, Paga, Ghana is the place for you. [Link]

Mental Floss » ‘80s Music is Boring, According to Science

Monday 11 May 23:12:49 UTC 2015

Most debates about pop music may be entirely subjective, but Matthias Mauch, an engineer at Queen Mary University of London, decided to take a more scientific approach to the subject. He and a team of colleagues put 17,000 songs spanning 50 years of the Billboard 100 list through data-mining software to generate a quantitative data set about the evolution of … [Link]

Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Why Warm Water Freezes Faster

Monday 11 May 23:12:48 UTC 2015

Scientists have long wondered why warm water freezes more quickly than cold water. Now they may have an answer. * You think your big flat screen TV is impressive? Well check out the Hoover Dam turned into a gigantic projection screen. Let's have a Super Bowl party there next February. * How does a miniature robot practice surgery? It stitches … [Link]

Mental Floss » The Microbiome Could Be the New Fingerprint

Monday 11 May 23:00:00 UTC 2015

The unique culture of bacteria living inside you may one day identify you as easily as a fingerprint does. The human microbiome—meaning the genetic material of all the organisms that call our bodies home, including bacteria, fungi, and viruses—is relatively unique across populations, and might be capable of identifying individuals within a population. In a new study published in the … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » How did the public image of hitchhikers go from viewing them as romantic Jack Kerouac-types out exploring the open road to seeing them as psycho killers who'll butcher you and your whole family if you pick them up? [Interesting]

Monday 11 May 22:52:24 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [156 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Calgarians blame themselves for May snowfall" [Dumbass]

Monday 11 May 22:42:57 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ♫ Shave and a haircut… and booze ♫ [Strange]

Monday 11 May 22:42:51 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [11 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Air Canada passenger gives birth at 35,000 feet over Pacific Ocean during flight to Japan, is immediately billed $75 for an extra piece of carry-on [Obvious]

Monday 11 May 22:41:46 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hipster-shaming in Portland: "Yes, I saw you throw your trash on the ground. I'm sure you thought some plebeian would pick it up. I was disgusted by your laziness and entitlement. BTW the trashy Stevie Nicks wannabe outfit is pretty tired&#34

Monday 11 May 22:26:30 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Erupt on Naomi? I moan, "Not pure" – It's palindrome week. Do you have a favorite? [Spiffy]

Monday 11 May 22:06:22 UTC 2015

Spiffy [link] [84 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 14 of the Most Depressing Place Names in North America

Monday 11 May 22:00:00 UTC 2015

I Bird 2, Flickr // CC BY-NC 2.0 Usually, town founders opt to name a place after something pleasant—two of the most common place names in America are Springfield and Fairview, and sites named for the founding fathers are also pretty common. However, some settlers and explorers called it like they saw it, naming places either for their gloomy topography … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It turns out, all planes all the time might not be the worst business plan for a Cable News Network [Interesting]

Monday 11 May 21:58:43 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Hey Amy, shouldn't parents with more children buy my only child more expensive gifts?" [Asinine]

Monday 11 May 21:40:49 UTC 2015

Asinine [link] [114 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » North Carolina county commission might be okay with non-Christian prayers, if only there was a "Jewish pastor" willing to deliver them. No Muslims, of course [Fail]

Monday 11 May 21:38:34 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You can now spy on your neighbors using a telephoto lens because a court says it's legal and everything [Cool]

Monday 11 May 21:35:03 UTC 2015

Cool [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you can't handle microscopic creatures bursting into balls of bacteria all over your face, you mite not want to read this [Weird]

Monday 11 May 21:29:27 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the 10 Closest Capitals to London, UK

Monday 11 May 21:07:56 UTC 2015

[Link]

Mental Floss » There Are 1600-Foot-Tall Waves Under the Ocean

Monday 11 May 21:00:46 UTC 2015

Deep underneath the ocean, there are swells that would put big wave surfers to shame. The biggest waves on Earth can’t be seen breaking against the shore, but underwater, they can reach heights almost as high as the tallest building in the Western Hemisphere, and can be observed throughout the year. Generated by tides pulling water across the varied topography … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This man earns almost £700 a month from Rule 34 by writing hardcore porn about the Apple Watch and Tetris [Strange]

Monday 11 May 20:50:49 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pitcher chewing [Photoshop]

Monday 11 May 20:30:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mediocre macaroni salad makes moderately good marker for getaway trail [Strange]

Monday 11 May 20:10:31 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [9 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Anthropologists Discover Ancient Greek Super PAC That Helped Shape First Democracy

Monday 11 May 20:01:00 UTC 2015

ATHENS, GREECE—In a finding that provides new insight into the roots of Western civilization, a team of anthropologists from Cambridge University announced Monday the discovery of an ancient Greek super PAC that helped shape the world’s first democracy. “At the same time Cleisthenes first instituted a representative form of government in Athens, it appears that a group of wealthy citizens … [Link]

Mental Floss » Procrastination Through the Ages: A Brief History of Wasting Time

Monday 11 May 20:00:00 UTC 2015

Thanks to the Internet, never before has procrastination been so ready an option for people in so many different walks of life, even if those of us who work at a computer for a living—writers especially—are most vulnerable. Over the past couple of decades academia has begun to take up procrastination as a worthy subject for research, with studies, analyses, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » That smug new mom who keeps going on about how she's using cloth diapers to help save the environment? Yeah, she's as full of it as her kid's diaper is [Obvious]

Monday 11 May 19:52:02 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [109 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Starbucks Won’t Bottle Water In California During Drought

Monday 11 May 19:29:00 UTC 2015

Starbucks said that it will stop sourcing its Ethos bottled water from a private spring in the Sierra Nevada foothills and instead move bottling operations to Pennsylvania in an effort to “support the people of the state of California as they face this unprecedented drought.” What do you think?
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » The real reason Carly Fiorina was fired from HP? She was too much of an innovator, too much of an outside-the-box thinker, too scary in her big ideas for the company. But she won't let that get her down, it's the price of being a leader [Unli

Monday 11 May 18:58:10 UTC 2015

Unlikely [link] [196 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Moroccan war plane goes missing? Yemen [Followup]

Monday 11 May 18:58:08 UTC 2015

Followup [link] [22 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Infographic: Pros And Cons Of Standardized Testing

Monday 11 May 18:52:00 UTC 2015

As the American education system continues to place more emphasis on standardized testing to measure academic achievement, critics have argued that it can be more harmful than helpful to students’ development in the long run. Here are some of the pros and cons of standardized testing: PROS
Every student measured against same narrow, irrelevant set of standards
Holds teachers personally accountable for …

[Link]

Futility Closet » Unquote

Monday 11 May 18:45:36 UTC 2015

“It vexes me greatly that having to earn my living has forced me to interrupt the work and to attend to small matters.” — Leonardo “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” — Louis Agassiz “How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Thug with a string of priors involved in another shooting [NewsFlash]

Monday 11 May 18:43:54 UTC 2015

NewsFlash [link] [663 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Libertarian hero who founded Liberland gets a small lesson in geopolitics [Dumbass]

Monday 11 May 18:41:56 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [60 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fark NotNewsletter: A Fark tradition turns 10 years old [FarkBlog]

Monday 11 May 18:26:24 UTC 2015

FarkBlog [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Possibly the only thing worse than getting caught having sex with your girlfriend's dog, is being caught being the "bottom" to the dog [Sick]

Monday 11 May 18:26:01 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [146 comments] [Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Mother Still Searching For Preschool That Focuses Exclusively On Her Son

Monday 11 May 18:22:00 UTC 2015

BOULDER, CO—Expressing frustration over the dearth of options that met her high standards, local mother Shannon Gail confirmed Monday that she was still looking for a preschool that would focus exclusively on her son. “I’ve been searching for months, but it’s been so difficult to find a program that devotes all its resources to my child, and only my child,” … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mercenaries 1, hashtag warriors 0 [Obvious]

Monday 11 May 18:11:38 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Exorcisms are like omelettes. Sometimes you have to break a few people to make them work [Sick]

Monday 11 May 18:01:25 UTC 2015

Sick [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » News of the Weird / Plus, May 11, 2015

Monday 11 May 18:00:38 UTC 2015

News of the Weird / Plus
May 11, 2015 (Part 1) [weird stuff that made me excited (frightened) (ROTFL) (appalled) last week, some of which will appear in News of the Weird soon] [Part 1 on Monday, Part 2 on Tuesday]

Since “all customer service calls are recorded,” as they say, it should be fairly easy for this lady to … [Link]

FMyLife » technodont says FML

Monday 11 May 17:59:49 UTC 2015

Today, my rental car had an automatic rear hatch. That sounded helpful until I used it and it emptied $60 in just-purchased groceries for the week on the parking lot pavement. The jars and jugs weren't ready for the leap. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 11 May 17:59:45 UTC 2015

Today, once again, I explained that yes, I'm Russian. No, I'm not a communist. No, I don't pray to a picture of Putin riding a bear. And no, I don't have any vodka on me. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Ride me all day for £3." Some people have a problem with this [Fail]

Monday 11 May 17:52:39 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 11 Things You May Not Know About ‘The Giver’

Monday 11 May 17:47:36 UTC 2015

Lois Lowry’s 1993 young adult hit The Giver has a more complex history than you may have known. 1. A visit to Lowry’s father in a nursing home helped inspire the novel. In his later years, Lowry’s father lost much of his long-term memory, which got Lowry thinking about the power and importance of memories: Without them, there can be … [Link]

Mental Floss » How a Faulty Printer Changed the Incredible Hulk

Monday 11 May 17:47:35 UTC 2015

This month saw the return of Mark Ruffalo’s temperamental Hulk in Avengers: Age of Ultron. His character has been a fan favorite for over 50 years—but did you know that, originally, the big guy was given a very different look? The muscle-bound antihero made his grand debut in Marvel Comics’ The Incredible Hulk #1 (1962). “Is he man or monster … [Link]

Mental Floss » Name the Movie by the Line of Trivia From IMDb

Monday 11 May 17:39:39 UTC 2015

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Baby kangaroo stolen from mother's pouch. Police say he answers to the name Joey [Sad]

Monday 11 May 17:38:33 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » For the last farking time: Artillery shells are NEVER appropriate carry-on baggage, EVAR, ANYWHERE. Got it? [PSA]

Monday 11 May 17:35:46 UTC 2015

PSA [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 29 Fun Facts About 'My Cousin Vinny'

Monday 11 May 17:30:54 UTC 2015

Familiarize yourself with legal procedure—and these facts you might not have known about this classic 1992 comedy, in which a very green, fish-out-of-water lawyer defends two “youtes” mistakenly charged with murder in his first court case. (Warning: There's profanity in the clips below!) 1. THE MOVIE WAS INSPIRED BY AN ENCOUNTER WITH A GUY HOPING TO PASS THE BAR. My … [Link]

Mental Floss » How Counterfeiters Nearly Ruined Opening Day at Disneyland

Monday 11 May 17:30:14 UTC 2015

When ABC television host Art Linkletter greeted viewers from Disneyland on July 17, 1955, he marveled that 15,000 happy visitors were in attendance. Beaming and resplendent in his suit, Linkletter was unaware of the seven-mile gridlock backing up the Santa Ana Freeway, that children who had been trapped in cars for hours were relieving their overtaxed bladders in the parking … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » At 2:00 pm eastern, ISIS to launch cyber attack as a "message to America" [Unlikely]

Monday 11 May 17:24:31 UTC 2015

Unlikely [link] [380 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Lord Worlsey, the son of the Earl of Yarborough, pulled over by police nearly three times the legal drink-drive limit and with his face smeared in boot polish [Weird]

Monday 11 May 17:10:21 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man suffers injuries, shame after moped accident [Florida]

Monday 11 May 17:05:57 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis: "Many powerful people don't want peace because they live off war…Some powerful people make their living with the production of arms. It's the industry of death" [Obvious]

Monday 11 May 16:56:16 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » I'm a shark, I'm a SHAAAARK, take my piiiic, I'M A SHAAAARK [Scary]

Monday 11 May 16:51:36 UTC 2015

Scary [link] [22 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What the Jade Helm 15 conspiracy theorists got right [Interesting]

Monday 11 May 16:43:57 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [143 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "The sun is rising above the horizon; the sky is bleeding crimson and gold. But I cannot turn to gaze at this everyday miracle because every time I do, I smell the anus of Satan" [Amusing]

Monday 11 May 16:27:17 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Two drugged-up Illinois residents arrested in bat country, a correlation between steroids and ball shrinkage, and scientist hopes beetle will help him get laid: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 5/3 – 5/9 [FarkBlog]

Monday 11 May 16:26:52 UTC 2015

FarkBlog [link] [0 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Visual arts students at the University of California, San Diego must perform naked in front of an entire nude class. Including the professor. Parental outrage reaches 100% [Weird]

Monday 11 May 16:25:01 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [64 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Who Owns the Titanic?

Monday 11 May 16:00:00 UTC 2015

Image Credit: Premier Exhibitions 30 years ago, a crew of American and French researchers led by oceanographer Robert Ballard reported some astonishing news: 73 years after hitting an iceberg, the R.M.S. Titanic had been found in the North Atlantic Ocean. Almost immediately, questions regarding who had the right to dive to depths of over 12,000 feet and retrieve artifacts—or even … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Want a huge booze discount? Become a foreign diplomat to Canada [Stupid]

Monday 11 May 15:54:15 UTC 2015

Stupid [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » News of the Weird (May 10, 2015)

Monday 11 May 15:28:47 UTC 2015

News of the Weird
Weirdnuz.M422, May 10, 2015
Copyright 2015 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.

Lead Story

Already, healthy people can donate blood, sperm, and eggs, but now the nonprofit OpenBiome offers donors $40 for bowel movements–to supply “fecal transplants” for patients with nasty C.difficile bacteria infections. (“Healthy” contents are transplanted into the infected gut via endoscope or frozen … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Lie like you've never lied before," the 26-year-old Fuchs told the 16-year-old student she was having an affair with [Dumbass]

Monday 11 May 15:28:01 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [155 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » CryoSpectre says FML

Monday 11 May 15:23:22 UTC 2015

Today, I made my mom cookies for Mother's Day. My brother took all the cookies to work as a snack, because I didn't specifically tell him that the homemade "MOM" hearts weren't meant for him. FML [Link]

The Onion » Photo Finish: Cooperstown Displays Vortex Bat Mark McGwire Used To Hit 900-Foot Home Run

Monday 11 May 15:20:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

The Onion » News in Brief: Being Older Than Daughter Babysitter’s Only Qualification

Monday 11 May 15:19:00 UTC 2015

UTICA, NY—Possessing no particular proficiencies or training whatsoever, local 12-year-old Jessica Radloff was reportedly hired to babysit Hayley Carden, 7, this week based solely on her qualification of being older than the child she was asked to watch. “Jessica is 12 now; she can watch Hayley,” said Carden’s mother, Denise, whose assessment of the middle schooler’s ability as a child-care … [Link]

The Onion » Editorial Cartoon: Highway Robbery

Monday 11 May 15:03:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Paramedics on emergency call wedge their ambulance under a low bridge, have to call fire and police to rescue them. These guys will have nicknames from this until the day they die (pics) [Amusing]

Monday 11 May 14:55:41 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cool: Parents impressed that their child's teacher is a movie star. Not cool: Parents not impressed that their child's teacher is a video star [Dumbass]

Monday 11 May 14:47:04 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [82 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Slideshow: The Week In Pictures – Week Of May 11, 2015

Monday 11 May 14:45:00 UTC 2015


[Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Study: Pregnant Women’s Cell Phone Rings May Startle Fetus

Monday 11 May 14:39:00 UTC 2015

According to a small study that has not been peer-reviewed, a mother’s cell phone rings may startle the fetus in the womb and disrupt its sleep cycle. What do you think?
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » To be fair to the voter in question, a good number of politicians are dicks [Amusing]

Monday 11 May 14:05:53 UTC 2015

Amusing [link] [8 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "This is part of a relentless pattern at Salon, using Fox's name as clickbait in dramatic headlines for pieces that have little or nothing to do with the network" [Obvious]

Monday 11 May 14:03:55 UTC 2015

Obvious [link] [81 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 24-year-old teacher arrested for having a "long term affair" with a student. Fark: A 12 year old [Dumbass]

Monday 11 May 13:57:48 UTC 2015

Dumbass [link] [293 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Dog gunit

Monday 11 May 13:49:44 UTC 2015

A few days ago a Veterinarian removed over a dozen live .308 caliber rounds from a dog's stomach.

http://abcnews.go.com/Weird/wireSto~
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Eight of the tiniest apartments up for rent in NYC. Bring money [Asinine]

Monday 11 May 13:33:17 UTC 2015

Asinine [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Questions: "Khan" You Dig It?

Monday 11 May 13:15:00 UTC 2015

[Link]

FMyLife » YouDontSay says FML

Monday 11 May 13:12:23 UTC 2015

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML [Link]

GraphJam » Perhaps It's the Wibbly Wobbly Timeline

Monday 11 May 13:08:24 UTC 2015

Potential Length of a TV Show 8 Graph by: warwick213 Tagged: Bar Graph , best of week , doctor who , length , tv shows Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Shouldn't There Be Some Damage From the Crash?

Monday 11 May 13:08:23 UTC 2015

awesome diagram van venn diagram - 4842939904 Graph by: (via pancake face) Tagged: awesome , diagram , van , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » revolving door speed

Monday 11 May 13:08:21 UTC 2015

accidents,door,justin bieber,Line Graph,revolving door,speed revolving door speed This reminds us of that time a certain J. Biebs was PWNED Get your daily dose of Celebrity-Fab LOLs from RoflRazzi Graph by: Ratlet Tagged: accidents , door , justin bieber , Line Graph , revolving door , speed Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 15 Things You Didn't Know About Death: An Infographic

Monday 11 May 13:08:20 UTC 2015

Death Elvis facts grim reaper infographic Graph by: Unknown Tagged: Death , Elvis , facts , grim reaper , infographic Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Components of a Calculus Problem

Monday 11 May 13:08:19 UTC 2015

calculus education magic math school LoL by: Tabbykat417 Tagged: calculus , education , magic , math , school Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Chances Of Getting A Spontaneous Boner

Monday 11 May 13:08:17 UTC 2015

boner,life,situational humor LoL by: Rosalhynne Tagged: boner , life , situational humor Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Wait For It

Monday 11 May 13:08:15 UTC 2015

When you need to pee Graph by: Unknown Tagged: bathroom , every day , pee , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » When It Rains in Movies

Monday 11 May 13:08:13 UTC 2015

cliché Death die KISS movies Pie Chart rain - 3571055872 Graph by: Unknown Tagged: cliché , Death , die , KISS , movies , Pie Chart , rain Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Music videos today.

Monday 11 May 13:08:12 UTC 2015

au natural band classic clip dancing dude failing music video playing remember song women Graph by: lithium89 Tagged: au natural , band , classic , clip , dancing , dude , failing , music video , playing , remember , song , women Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Who Said That?!

Monday 11 May 13:08:10 UTC 2015

How People View Me,invisible,ninja Submitted by: mattow Tagged: How People View Me , invisible , ninja Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Yeah You Did

Monday 11 May 13:08:08 UTC 2015

flow chart,oh snap,phrase,proper usage,told Graph by: maxystone Tagged: flow chart , oh snap , phrase , proper usage , told Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Back Away From the Phone

Monday 11 May 13:08:06 UTC 2015

crush,phone,Pie Chart,texting Graph by: Tagged: crush , phone , Pie Chart , texting Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » I Just Got My Second Wind

Monday 11 May 13:08:05 UTC 2015

Bar Graph bed time not tired sleep Graph by: Paranormalic Tagged: Bar Graph , bed time , not tired , sleep Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Grapham City Needs a Hero

Monday 11 May 13:08:03 UTC 2015

batman,cells,gotham,na na na,spreadsheet,superheroes No cell can contain him. Graph by: (via frogman) Tagged: batman , cells , gotham , na na na , spreadsheet , superheroes Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Banana Cream and Everything

Monday 11 May 13:08:00 UTC 2015

Graph by: OllyRokz Tagged: dessert , diet , mom , pie , Pie Chart Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » So Cute, So Awful

Monday 11 May 13:07:59 UTC 2015

Mario Kart,Music,Pie Chart,video games Graph by: sbb1204 Tagged: Mario Kart , Music , Pie Chart , video games Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » States the Red Hot Chili Peppers write songs about

Monday 11 May 13:07:57 UTC 2015

LoL by: elraulix Tagged: california , florida , Music , red hot chili peppers , Songs , states Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » When do diets start:

Monday 11 May 13:07:51 UTC 2015

diet food Pie Chart procrastination start today tomorrow yesterday - 3573509120 Graph by: Jigokuneko Tagged: diet , food , Pie Chart , procrastination , start , today , tomorrow , yesterday Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Choose Your Own Adventure Novel Adventure

Monday 11 May 13:07:50 UTC 2015

best of week,books,fantasy,flow chart,sci fi Graph by: (via www.box.net) Tagged: best of week , books , fantasy , flow chart , sci fi Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Would You Like Another Basket?

Monday 11 May 13:07:49 UTC 2015

Graph by: Nik Tagged: basket , cheddar biscuits , expensive , food , meal , Pie Chart , red lobster Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » 

Monday 11 May 13:07:46 UTC 2015

bandwidth excuses excuses lag Multiplayer online Pie Chart steal better wifi - 3927054592 Graph by: DruidTC Tagged: bandwidth , excuses excuses , lag , Multiplayer , online , Pie Chart , steal better wifi Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » We Just Want Different Things

Monday 11 May 13:07:45 UTC 2015

What lame excuses do you give? Graph by: avallach Tagged: break up , couples , truth , venn diagram Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Classic: Also How I Get My Exercise

Monday 11 May 13:07:44 UTC 2015

cabinets,flow chart,food pyramid,freezer,fridge,hungry,search Graph by: RoadkillJoe667 Tagged: cabinets , flow chart , food pyramid , freezer , fridge , hungry , search Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Hell's Vending Machine

Monday 11 May 13:07:43 UTC 2015

Graph by: (via Pleated Jeans) Tagged: hell , spiders , sunflower seeds , vending machine Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » The Biggest Fossil I've Ever Seen!

Monday 11 May 13:07:42 UTC 2015

africa,dinosaur,infographic,map,south america,t rex Graph by: Unknown Tagged: africa , dinosaur , infographic , map , south america , t rex Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Shower Curtain Adhesive Preferences

Monday 11 May 13:07:40 UTC 2015

Bar Graph cling curtain morning routine shower sticky Graph by: Phil Tagged: Bar Graph , cling , curtain , morning routine , shower , sticky Share on Facebook [Link]

GraphJam » Time Sensitive Anatomy

Monday 11 May 13:07:37 UTC 2015

freeze pop,freezie,otter pop,popsicle,summer,yum Graph by: (via The Chlorine Mermaid) Tagged: freeze pop , freezie , otter pop , popsicle , summer , yum Share on Facebook [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Cool Science Images

Monday 11 May 13:06:55 UTC 2015

11 Super-Cool Science Photos From The Past Decade. One for each year on a wide variety of subjects.
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18 films that took their inspiration from James Bond movies. That’s every secret agent movie and a whole lot of others.
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10 Things We Thought Were True Before the Scientific Method. Things that seem to make sense ain’t necessarily so. … [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Things We Learned from George R.R. Martin on 'Bullseye'

Monday 11 May 13:06:50 UTC 2015

4. He thinks Gandalf should've stayed dead. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this upward spiral [Photoshop]

Monday 11 May 13:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Russian Navy Seals

Monday 11 May 12:44:14 UTC 2015

They're armed with guns. Apparently this was part of a performance for Russia's recent Victory Day celebrations. More info here.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Orlando's much-hyped monorail system had a $27.2 million deficit its first year, fueling fears the city may wind up just like Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook [Florida]

Monday 11 May 12:30:23 UTC 2015

Florida [link] [151 comments] [Link]

Overheard In The Office » If It’s an Incomplete Bitch You Want, I’d Consider Spaying

Monday 11 May 12:22:02 UTC 2015

Receptionist: Can I help you this morning?Mom: Yes. I need a shot to keep my daughter from being a complete bitch.Teen girl: Like they’ve invented that, Mom.Chestnut Ridge Pediatrics
Woodcliffe Lake, New JerseyOverheard by: Mothers Anonymous
[Link]

Overheard In The Office » I Don’t Care Who’s Going Into Labor, Just Get Me That Keg

Monday 11 May 12:22:01 UTC 2015

20-something guy on phone: Hey! Yeah, whatever. Do you have the keg? No, no listen to… Shut up! Listen to me! Do you have the keg?San Francisco, CaliforniaOverheard by: Picadilly Bones [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Their Presentation on the Buddha Left a Lot to Be Desired

Monday 11 May 12:22:00 UTC 2015

IT guy #1: Asian. Asiaaaann.IT guy #2: Like, 800 years old. A thousand. Thousands of years old.IT guy #1: Asian. Asian. Asian.43rd & Madison
New York City, New YorkOverheard by: WTF?! [Link]

Overheard In The Office » 11AM Work on Project

Monday 11 May 12:21:58 UTC 2015

Co-worker #1: Well, it’s not going to be ready now…
Co-worker #2: I don’t think it’s due to be done until the due date. 1 Penn Plaza
New York, NY [Link]

Overheard In The Office » In the UN Intramural League, we’re Just ‘Dem Bums’

Monday 11 May 12:21:57 UTC 2015

Engineer to lunchroom: So do you guys know if we’re officially called ‘United States of America’ or is it just ‘United States’?413 Pine St
Seattle, Washington [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Don’t People Usually Get Whiter Staying at the Seattle Ritz?

Monday 11 May 12:21:56 UTC 2015

Suit #1: So, I heard they put you up at the Ritz in Seattle!Suit #2: They did! I stayed there over the weekend. It was so nice…Suit #1: Gangsta, son, gangsta.Suit #2: That’s how I roll, homie.Rockville, MarylandOverheard by: Amused [Link]

Overheard In The Office » It's Easy to Tell Which Servers Have Worked at Sears

Monday 11 May 12:21:55 UTC 2015

Restaurant customer waving to waitress: Check, check! Waitress: No, ma'am, we don't take checks!Seattle, WashingtonOverheard by: t bean [Link]

Mental Floss » Marvel at the Great Crab Pyramid

Monday 11 May 12:00:42 UTC 2015

Scuba diver PT Hirschfield was swimming by the Blairgowrie Pier in Australia when she stumbled upon a horrifying, and unusual, sight: A giant pile of hundreds of spider crabs. The crabs are known to gather into huge groups before their annual migration. Some believe that the animals find safety in numbers when they're shedding their shells; apparently the process doesn't … [Link]

Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #248

Monday 11 May 11:52:39 UTC 2015

Stops spies from sweating during torture. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Adolph Hitler, marriage counselor [Strange]

Monday 11 May 11:48:22 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Subby feels dirty and blasphemous after reading these baffling ways religion has tried to sex up its image [Weird]

Monday 11 May 10:31:18 UTC 2015

Weird [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 57: Jules Verne’s Lost Novel

Monday 11 May 10:06:12 UTC 2015


Eight decades after Jules Verne’s death, his great-grandson opened a family safe and discovered an unpublished manuscript. In this episode of the Futility Closet podcast we’ll review some of Verne’s remarkable predictions for the 20th century and consider why he never published the novel. We’ll also discuss listeners’ ideas about the mysterious deaths of nine Soviet ski hikers in 1959 … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You know you're wealthy when you can afford to pay a doctor to remove a tumor from your pet goldfish [Strange]

Monday 11 May 10:00:07 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » No women advance through first round of Army Ranger training, but are given some lovely parting gifts [Fail]

Monday 11 May 9:43:04 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [179 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » King of Saudi Arabia refuses to kiss another Muslim [Sad]

Monday 11 May 9:38:25 UTC 2015

Sad [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Future of Music As Medicine

Monday 11 May 9:00:00 UTC 2015

To some degree or another, we all self-medicate with music, by choosing tunes not just to suit our mood but also to influence it. And now, Boston-based company The Sync Project is setting out to learn just how far that effect can be pushed—"to figure out if music can truly be used as medicine," CEO and co-founder Alexis Kopikis told … [Link]

FMyLife » weirdlaugh says FML

Monday 11 May 8:38:57 UTC 2015

Today, I planned a lunch out with my mom for Mother's Day. She seemed excited about it and "couldn't wait!" She never showed up. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you really want to reduce how much snoring you do at night, try elevating the back of the roof of your mouth and uvula while saying the vowel "A" [Strange]

Monday 11 May 7:29:28 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Mr. T, Celebrity Bodyguard

Monday 11 May 6:50:08 UTC 2015

Mr. T, who's going to be 63 next week, has packed a lot of different careers into those decades, from a brief stint as a military policeman to trying out for the Green Bay Packers (a knee injury prevented him from making the team). In the ‘70s, T (real name: Laurence Tureaud) paid the bills working as a security guard … [Link]

Mental Floss » 15 Things You Should Know About Michelangelo's 'Pietà'

Monday 11 May 6:45:43 UTC 2015

Since its creation in 1499, Michelangelo's Pietà has inspired emotion, faith, and imitation through its elegant depiction of the Virgin Mary and Jesus Christ. Yet few know the secrets that are still being uncovered about this centuries-old statue. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cross country runner takes it to the next level as part of the "Got Milk" advertising campaign [Strange]

Monday 11 May 6:04:00 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It turns out the ancient Egyptians were big fat scammers. Especially when they ran out of dead cats [Strange]

Monday 11 May 5:24:00 UTC 2015

Strange [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Have a Great Palindrome Week!

Monday 11 May 3:12:15 UTC 2015

If you write dates the U.S. way, it's 5/10/15—a palindrome day! The numbers in the date read the same forwards and backwards. That's pretty exciting in its own way, but the rest of the week (and beyond) will also be palindrome days, making it a whole palindrome week and a half: 5/10/15
5/11/15
5/12/15
5/13/15
5/14/15
5/15/15
5/16/15
5/17/15
5/18/15 … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man caught using foreskin to smuggle heroin. Police say they were acting on a tip [Fail]

Monday 11 May 2:37:03 UTC 2015

Fail [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What made a Georgia high school principal go on a racist tirade during graduation? I don't know. Could it be… SATAN? [Unlikely]

Monday 11 May 1:23:08 UTC 2015

Unlikely [link] [233 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Living in NYC tip #327, the subway butt-wedge [Interesting]

Monday 11 May 1:10:10 UTC 2015

Interesting [link] [58 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » pissed says FML

Monday 11 May 1:04:16 UTC 2015

Today, during a very stressful and busy day at work, I took a bathroom break. Unfortunately, of all the things on my mind, taking down my pants before emptying my bladder wasn't one of them. FML [Link]

Overheard In The Office » 3PM Coffee Break

Monday 11 May 0:37:22 UTC 2015

Employee: “Isolate”? Why’s there an E on the end?
Supervisor: …
Employee: Oh. Just kidding!
Supervisor: Seriously?
Employee: It looked weird.
Supervisor: So when you go to the coffee shop, do you order a “late”?
Employee: No, I order a latt. Two Ts. 500 Dulany Street
Alexandria, Virginia [Link]

Overheard In The Office » …Now Describe Yourself in One Sentence.

Monday 11 May 0:37:20 UTC 2015

Legal secretary: The last thing I need is to get arrested for stealing a dead woman's flowers.Salt Lake City, Utah [Link]

Overheard In The Office » …Ahem, “Dear Taxbitches…”

Monday 11 May 0:37:19 UTC 2015

Boss to underling: We got a letter back from the IRS. It's about the faggiest letter you can possibly conceive of. I'm going to read it to you now..Manhattan, New York [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Fine, I’m All Done Making Cookies for You

Monday 11 May 0:37:18 UTC 2015

Gay admin: I’m thinking of taking a gym class at a community college next quarter. What do you think I should take?Straight admin: Badminton. Yep, definitely badminton. That’s nice and gay.Sunnyvale, California [Link]

Overheard In The Office » My Early 20's: Encapsulated.

Monday 11 May 0:37:17 UTC 2015

Sexy program manager: Too late. It's in my mouth.Brooklyn, New YorkOverheard by: casayoto [Link]

Overheard In The Office » When Academics Go Into the Private Sector

Monday 11 May 0:37:16 UTC 2015

Employee: You look like a hobo office worker! Can I take a picture?Los Angeles, California [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Monday 11 May 0:17:53 UTC 2015

Today, I was feeling pretty, so I wore a skirt for the first time in years. Two hours later, my thighs hurt from slapping together so much. I no longer feel pretty. FML [Link]

Overheard In The Office » Your Editors Have Learned That This Totally Works

Monday 11 May 0:15:08 UTC 2015

Older janitor to young engineer, about picking up girls: You have to trap'em like Daniel Boone style, set out some salad with ranch dressin' or somethin' like that”.Lexington, KentuckyOverheard by: Rick [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this close landing [Photoshop]

Monday 11 May 0:00:01 UTC 2015

Photoshop [link] [22 comments] [Link]

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