Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
Fark.com RSS » Not really news: jewelry store robbery. News: $4.6 million necklace stolen. Fark: police are searching for the 12-year-old girl who did it [Strange]
[link] [45 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman decides that since she's at a wildlife sanctuary, all the animal are domesticated, so it's okay to reach an arm into a cage and try to pet an animal. Even when that caged animal is a 400-pound black bear [Florida]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Chinese men caught stealing two million baby eels. Authorities said the smugglers' getaway hovercraft was jammed full of them [Strange]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 5PM You Don’t Have to Tell Me Twice
Co-worker on phone: Okay, go home and make dinner and await further instructions. 133 Littleton Road
Westford, Massachusetts [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The best thing to happen to KY since jelly [Hero]
[link] [113 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis says we should… Hold on *click click click click click click click click* Says we should put down… Hold on *click click click click click click click* We should put down our iPhones and talk to each… Hold on [Obvious]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Roanoke woman discovers the Catch-22 about parking in space 22 [Strange]
[link] [49 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » The Streets Are Filled with Earnest Strivers, Though
Straight cube girl: Straight people are a dime a dozen! It’s hard to find a good lesbian lover. You, of all people, should know that.Straight cube guy: I know, I know.350 Madison Avenue
New York, New York [Link]
Fark.com RSS » TMZ catches John "Papa John" Schnatter eating someone else's pizza. Bonus: with a fork. OH THE HUMANITY [Obvious]
[link] [136 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » gregfsmash says FML
Today, I fell asleep in my car. Being a heavy sleeper, I didn't hear a man knocking on my window. What did I hear? Him smashing my window open because he thought I was dead. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » FBI investigating 'credible' bomb threats at Atlanta airport [News]
[link] [138 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fire captain removes naked photos of 8-year-old dead girl who died in the 1944 circus fire from the wall of his firehouse. And, shockingly, people have a problem with this [Sad]
[link] [87 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Caption these two happy penguins [Caption]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this sit and stretch [Photoshop]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman goes to dentist to have a little work done, comes out with no teeth. It's the British way [Scary]
[link] [31 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Sensational NASA photo proves once and for all, beyond all doubt, that life exists on Mars [Spiffy]
[link] [99 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Scientists upload a worm's mind into a Lego robot. Hell I did that with my best friend's Legos in the school sandbox back in 1983 and no one wrote anything about me [Interesting]
[link] [32 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you're a fugitive wanted for credit card fraud and theft, it's probably best not to take selfies featuring you and the wads of cash you've stolen from people and post them to Instagram [Florida]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 10 of Winston Churchill's Best Quotes
Churchill passed away 50 years ago today. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Welcome to National Handwriting Day. Please just try to follow the script [Spiffy]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Proving once again that having a dog is better than having a child, study shows that helicopter parenting is actually appreciated by a pet [Cool]
[link] [12 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop challenge: A modern day version of this classic ad [Photoshop]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When you need to trick your kids into eating oysters, mussels, and clams you're only really satisfying your own shellfish desires [Obvious]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Jamaica FINALLY decides to decriminalize marijuana: "Marijuana law reform could boost the island's already significant tourist industry" [Spiffy]
[link] [17 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Mickey's Measles is in Oregon now, and is in a county where the highest exemption rate is a school that has 49% of students missing one or more vaccinations [Scary]
[link] [126 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » School sends note to parents attempting to shame them with request for signature. The parent's response is golden, and then it gets better [Amusing]
[link] [178 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Who brings a machete to a pike & musket fight? [Scary]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Worst FBI Informant ever [Amusing]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 12 Clever and Creative Snowmen
This morning I awoke to see my world covered in snow. The temperature is warm enough for the roads to clear and for snow to pack together nicely, yet cold enough for the white stuff to survive the day. It’s a perfect day to build a snowman, whether Elsa wants to participate or not. If you don’t have snow, enjoy … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman gets arrested for . . . Wait, what the fark? [Asinine]
[link] [157 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "A 23-year-old British student has spoken of being "trapped in a time loop" after one of the most unusual cases of extreme déjà vu has crippled the last eight years of his life" [Dumbass]
[link] [115 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Sex Ed teacher arrested for giving student hands on training [Fail]
[link] [142 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Police: Please don't loot the zombie hunter's vacant home just because he's in jail [Followup]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Remember back in college when you had the luxury of time to turn your dorm room into a giant ball pit for no good reason? Good times, man [Spiffy]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "It was dark, they couldn't see. They assumed it was someone jumping, but at some point they realized the person was not responding to their commands. One of them pulled out their binoculars and realized it was a mannequin" [Amusing]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #240
"I'm so dumb I can't even pronounce 'aluminum!'" [Link]
Mental Floss » Make a "Magic Number" Grid to Blow Kids' Minds
Use the power of math to (mildly) amaze your kids. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nitrous oxide makes comeback to treat delivery room pain. Doctors say the Wa Wa Wa's are good preparation for the Wa Wa Wa's [Cool]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Baby Cage
Problem: It's hard to travel with a baby.
Solution: build a portable cage to carry your kid in. I wonder if the TSA would approve of these. Source: Illustrated World (Mar 1920).
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » The numbers are now in, and the TSA seized 2212 firearms at U.S. airports last year. FARK: Most were loaded [Scary]
[link] [261 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Watching people try North Carolina moonshine for the first time goes exactly how you'd expect [Amusing]
[link] [68 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Weekend Links: The Faces Behind Hand Models
Hand models, whose pristine palms are the moneymakers in print and TV ads, get a rare chance to pose with their heads for a photo series matching the "supermodel" hands with their owners' ordinary faces. * Here are where all 2,621,514 goats in the United States are located. * By now you've no doubt heard SkyMall's parent company has declared … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman snaps amazing photo of Bigfoot in northeastern Ohio: "If you look closely, you can see snow stuck to the hair on the leg and buttocks of the photographed subject" (with totally not photoshopped pic, pinkie-swear) [Unlikely]
[link] [66 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 9AM Back to Work
Co-worker #1: Oh, I’m so glad you are here.
Co-worker #2: Why?
Co-worker #1: Because I got my hand stuck in the hole. 6 Campus Drive
Parsippany, New Jersey [Link]
Overheard In The Office » If I Pass Out, Inject Me with the Blue Needle
Frazzled boss: Today has been just awful.Concerned coworker: I know, hun. (in a hushed tone) Do you want a Xanax?Frazzled boss: Oh, god, no…thank you…I have my own supply. (in hushed tone) And I've already had several.New York City, New York [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Collect Them All! Trade with Your Friends!
Secretary: What I’d give for an eight-year-old vagina again…Orange County, California [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Only By Pressing Control Alt Delete
Girl behind counter: So we open the oyster up, and inside we will find a pearl.Middle aged American tourist: Wow, that is amazing! Does this hurt them?Girl: Yes, this kills them.Tourist: What! Can't you restart their brains or something?Japanese Department Store, EPCOT Centre
Orlando, FloridaOverheard by: mark shale [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 5PM That’s a Wrap
Co-worker #1: [Justin], can I borrow your finance guide?
Co-worker #2: Um, sure…Wait, it’s not here. I did have one, but it’s gone.
Co-worker #1: Yeah, I borrowed it.
Co-worker #2: … 233 Broadway
New York, NY [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 1PM Lunch
Sales #1: There’s lint on your shoulder.
Sales #2: Oh.
Sales #1: Here, I’ll pick it off. Wait, here’s Scotch tape; that works better.
Sales #2: I feel like those monkeys that pick bugs off each other’s heads and backs. 712 South Hacienda Drive
Tempe, Arizona [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Mittens the hermaphroditic cat is awaiting gender reassignment surgery to become a boy because the dual genitalia are causing bowel and urinary issues. Please warmly welcome him to Caturday [Caturday]
[link] [685 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Parenting advice from "America's worst mom": Calm the fark down. Seriously, land that farking helicopter once and for all and go make yourself a martini like your mom did [Hero]
[link] [90 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » You Can Come If You Want
Lady worker: There’s a party in my uterus!South Park Circle
Orlando, FloridaOverheard by: Meg [Link]
FMyLife » xoragebaby says FML
Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML [Link]
Mental Floss » GoPro and the NHL are Teaming Up
Thanks to a recent partnership with Vislink, GoPro can now stream live HD footage. We can see that development in action at the 60th NHL All-Star weekend in Columbus. GoPro and NHL's team-up means sturdy cameras adhered right onto the player's helmets, so fans at home can feel like they're right there on the ice. The footage will be broadcast … [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I saw selfies of my aunt and her friends on Facebook having a great time. They took the pictures at my mother's funeral last week. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my dad uploaded his porn collection onto our family server. My mom was convinced I did it and sat me down for a long talk. FML [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 12PM Fix Cabinet
Attorney: Is this the drawer that’s broken?
Co-worker: Yes. I’ve already told you how to fix it. I mean, it’s not as serious as cancer.
Attorney: Thank you for that assessment. 1999 Harrison Street
Oakland, California [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you think bedbugs in your mattress are terrifying, try not to think about all the dust mites and bodily fluids [Scary]
[link] [47 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Anyone Else Just Have a Startling Realization about the Energizer Bunny?
Order entry lady: It’s like they’re chasing each other around the apartment!Shipping manager: Maybe they are.Order entry lady: Well, he’s a little [whispers] fag. So, you know…Shipping manager: Oh, yeah! Them people stay up all night! They got extra energy!8900 Kelso Drive
Baltimore, Maryland [Link]
Overheard In The Office » 1PM Lunch
Co-worker #1: Hey, tell them that story you were telling me the other day. The one about Burger King.
Co-worker #2: What story about Burger King?
Co-worker #1: You know…you were with your dad or your father-in-law…
Co-worker #2: The story where my father had a heart attack because of a Burger King sandwich?
Co-worker #1: …Yeah.
Co-worker #2: That’s … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Gay cousins can now marry in Alabama [Cool]
[link] [108 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » After West Yorkshire abandons iconic British bobby helmet in favour of modern police caps, BBC asks if the helmet makes any sense in today's hectic modern world. Caps "are less likely to fall off heads, it is argued, and can be worn in a car&
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Punctual
Ernest Hemingway published this “blank verse” in his high school literary magazine in 1916: 
Get it? David Morice followed up with this “punctuation poem” in Word Ways in February 2012: % , & —
+ . ? /
” :
% ;
+ $ [ It’s a limerick: Percent comma ampersand dash
Plus period question mark slash
Quotation mark colon … [Link]
FMyLife » nosexforthee says FML
Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Drug that causes weight loss, prevents Type 2 diabetes, raises good cholesterol and gives a high – the Holy Grail of drugs. If it also cures hangovers it's a winner [Cool]
[link] [102 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Annomymous says FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » University of Michigan frat goes full Animal House, never go full Animal House [Fail]
[link] [92 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Just to prove its not all nope down under .. the ten best BEER gardens [Spiffy]
[link] [18 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Colorado's governor: Legalizing pot was totally bogus [Obvious]
[link] [143 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Man completes 7 marathons on 7 continents in 7 days, makes the rest of us look really lazy [Interesting]
[link] [72 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Local crank and website owner aims to take reins of KY government [Hero]
[link] [614 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » In news that will no doubt shock the world a billionaire invested over $100 million into a casino chain and was shocked to find out he had become involved with the mafia [Obvious]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
Overheard In The Office » What With the Constant Impact
Female coworker on chiropodic problems: Over time, the fat underneath your balls deteriorates, especially if you work out.Cincinnati, Ohio [Link]
Overheard In The Office » And Perhaps Some More Ritalin
Checkout girl: Hi, how are… [Turns to employee at next register.] Have I ever told you how badly I want a pet monkey? Like, besides getting out of this hellhole, it’s, like, the only thing I want in life.Oneida, New YorkOverheard by: fellow customer in line [Link]
Overheard In The Office » When the State Tallied the Votes on Proposition 8, for Instance
Employee to another: It does not exist. San Fransisco does not exist.Washington, DCOverheard by: then where was i? [Link]
Overheard In The Office » These Bibles Aren't Gonna Sell Themselves
Boss to office employees, about receptionist: We're gonna need Jennifer to start wearing provocative clothing to get some customers in here!Marietta, GeorgiaOverheard by: Sure, I'll slut it up for you a bit… [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Luxury 1965 Volkswagen Microbus Limousine for sale? *WANT* [Cool]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Sure, he fatally shot his ex-wife in front of their children, but his real crime was lying about being a co-founder of Plaxo [Strange]
[link] [7 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cops arrest man for possession of "New England Patriots drug pipe." Further proof that the NFL will license anything [Amusing]
[link] [26 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » uggg says FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that her fear of PDA has gotten so bad, she doesn't think she'll even be able to kiss me on our wedding day. Her parents are going be there and she can't imagine showing affection in front of other people, let alone her parents. FML [Link]
FMyLife » LD says FML
Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Ineedlotsofwater says FML
Today, I found out why I receive random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML [Link]
Overheard In The Office » Ironing Their Bandana Collection Is Monopolizing My Time
Manager: Did you watch Top Model last night?Analyst employee: I can’t until the lesbians come back -I’m house sitting.Empire Boulevard
Burbank, CaliforniaOverheard by: Statja K [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Watermelon may lose its status as state vegetable of Oklahoma – and be replaced with a list of legislators who back in 2007 thought watermelon was a vegetable [Dumbass]
[link] [51 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this sky view [Photoshop]
[link] [16 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 'I'm very fussy about what I eat and when I saw what was in the McNugget I went white,' says woman who eats McNuggets at McDonald's [Unlikely]
[link] [73 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » How a Game of Monopoly Put 15 Criminals Behind Bars
On August 8, 1963, a Royal Mail train puffed toward London carrying £2.6 million in cash. It was the dead of night, and the old tattered bank notes were destined for a government furnace, where they’d be permanently taken out of circulation. But 15 crooks hiding in the darkness had different plans. Wielding crowbars, the thieves held up the train. … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » An explanation of how much airlines owe you if you get bumped off an overbooked flight. Bottom line: Did you volunteer to get bumped? SUCKER [Interesting]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Sorry folks, park's closed. The moose, God & space aliens out front should have told ya" [Strange]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Archive
25 Apr 2024 24 Apr 2024 23 Apr 2024 22 Apr 2024 21 Apr 2024 20 Apr 2024 19 Apr 2024 18 Apr 2024 17 Apr 2024 16 Apr 2024 15 Apr 2024 14 Apr 2024 13 Apr 2024 12 Apr 2024 11 Apr 2024 10 Apr 2024 09 Apr 2024 08 Apr 2024 07 Apr 2024 06 Apr 2024 05 Apr 2024 04 Apr 2024 03 Apr 2024 02 Apr 2024 01 Apr 2024 31 Mar 2024 30 Mar 2024 29 Mar 2024 28 Mar 2024 27 Mar 2024 26 Mar 2024 25 Mar 2024
0 responses so far ↓
There are no comments yet...Kick things off by filling out the form below.
You must log in to post a comment.