Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » ratqueen says FML
Today, I discovered that catching fewer mice in the traps I'd put out doesn't mean my pest problem is getting resolved. It means that rats have moved in. FML [Link]
The Onion » NFL To Crack Down On Players For Excessive Thanksgiving Celebrations
NFL To Crack Down On Players For Excessive Thanksgiving Celebrations
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Budweiser Retiring Clydesdale Ads In Grab For Millennials
As part of an effort to market more effectively to young millennial consumers, Budweiser has reportedly opted to remove its famous Clydesdale horses from holiday advertising.
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Ferguson Prosecutor: Cable News ‘Most Significant Challenge Encountered’ In Investigation
Before announcing that a grand jury had declined to indict officer Darren Wilson in the shooting death of Michael Brown, prosecuting attorney Robert McCulloch blamed cable news and social media for civil unrest in Ferguson, MO, saying, “The most sig…
[Link]
The Onion » Ferguson Decision Reaffirms Right Of Police To Use Deadly Force When They Feel Sufficiently Inclined
WASHINGTON—Following a legal precedent established over the course of decades, the St. Louis County grand jury decision Monday to not indict officer Darren Wilson in the shooting death of an unarmed teen reportedly reaffirmed the right of police to …
[Link]
The Onion » Nation Doesn’t Know If It Can Take Another Bullshit Speech About Healing
WASHINGTON—In the wake of a grand jury’s divisive decision not to charge Ferguson, MO police officer Darren Wilson in the shooting death of unarmed black teenager Michael Brown, a weary American populace told reporters Tuesday that they are no…
[Link]
Futility Closet » Unquote
“What leapings of the heart must there not have been throughout that long warfare! What moments of terror and triumph! What acts of devotion and desperate wonders of courage!” — H.G. Wells, of prehistoric man [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: Last-Minute Holiday Travel Tips
Whether you’re rerouting canceled flights or changing destinations on the fly, nothing can be more stressful during the holidays than making travel arrangements at the last minute.
[Link]
The Onion » Report: U.S. Students Lead World In Knowledge Of Common Household Items That Will Give You Buzz
WASHINGTON—Confirming that U.S. students’ competency in the area of knowledge had only increased in recent years, a Pew Research Center report published Tuesday found that young Americans continue to lead the world in their awareness of which …
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Town Considers Replacing Ugly Christmas Tree After Public Outcry
City officials in Reading, PA agreed to replace a 50-foot-tall Christmas tree downtown that residents complained was “pathetic” and “ugly” before the city council president changed his mind and ordered construction workers in the p…
[Link]
The Onion » Your Horoscopes — Week Of November 25, 2014
ARIES: You'll inspire thousands to go out and do something with their lives in order not to wind up being as pathetic and useless as you are.
[Link]
The Onion » Jason Garrett Insists He Can Trace Coaching Tree Back To Mayflower
DALLAS—Noting that he takes great pride in the rich legacy of his predecessors, Dallas Cowboys head coach Jason Garrett told reporters Tuesday that he is able to trace his coaching tree all the way back to the landing of the Mayflower. Garret…
[Link]
The Onion » Alcoholic Father Granted Posthumous Sainthood By Catholic Family
Alcoholic Father Granted Posthumous Sainthood By Catholic Family
[Link]
FMyLife » amazinghermit says FML
Today, I spent a hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML [Link]
Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #236
[Link]
Weird Universe » Shun the Mustache Kiss!
We're now three weeks into Movember. So this seems like timely advice from the Washington Post – Apr 28, 1912.
[Link]
FMyLife » anonymous says FML
Today, I was in a good mood for once and my professor looks at me and says, "I don't know what you ate for breakfast but you're really annoying today." FML [Link]
FMyLife » Hammy says FML
Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML [Link]
Futility Closet » Sizing Up
Two lines divide this equilateral triangle into four sections. The shaded sections have the same area. What is the measure of the obtuse angle between the lines? SelectClick for Answer> Triangles CAM and ABN have the same area. Rotating triangle ABC 120° takes CAM into ABM1. Since ABN and ABM1 have the same area and both N and M1 fall … [Link]
FMyLife » stupid says FML
Today, I realized that customers at my work ask me "Are you new or just stupid?" just as often as they did when I first started. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML [Link]
Archive
29 Mar 2024 28 Mar 2024 27 Mar 2024 26 Mar 2024 25 Mar 2024 24 Mar 2024 23 Mar 2024 22 Mar 2024 21 Mar 2024 20 Mar 2024 19 Mar 2024 18 Mar 2024 17 Mar 2024 16 Mar 2024 15 Mar 2024 14 Mar 2024 13 Mar 2024 12 Mar 2024 11 Mar 2024 10 Mar 2024 09 Mar 2024 08 Mar 2024 07 Mar 2024 06 Mar 2024 05 Mar 2024 04 Mar 2024 03 Mar 2024 02 Mar 2024 01 Mar 2024 29 Feb 2024 28 Feb 2024 27 Feb 2024
0 responses so far ↓
There are no comments yet...Kick things off by filling out the form below.
You must log in to post a comment.