Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » ohwell says FML
Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML [Link]
FMyLife » ugh says FML
Today, I was really excited to get a new bank account in my name. My parents wanted me to have it so they could transfer money from mine to theirs and vice versa. What excited me less was my father drunkenly accessing it and taking all my cash. FML [Link]
The Oatmeal – Comics, Quizzes, & Stories » Cyber Monday 2014
Stuff is on sale.View [Link]
Mental Floss » A Tree That Flowers With 40 Different Fruits
treeof40fruit.com For most of the year, the trees of 40 fruits, of which there are currently 16 in the world, look like any other tree. But in spring, dozens of shades of pinks and reds and whites begin to appear, and by the end of the summer, each one has produced a harvest of over 40 different kinds of stone … [Link]
Futility Closet » Podcast Episode 35: Lateral Thinking Puzzles
For this Thanksgiving episode of the Futility Closet podcast, enjoy seven lateral thinking puzzles that didn’t make it onto our regular shows. Solve along with us as we explore some strange scenarios using only yes-or-no questions. Happy Thanksgiving! You can listen using the player above, download this episode directly, or subscribe on iTunes or via the RSS feed at http://feedpress.me/futilitycloset. … [Link]
Weird Universe » Maine man counts one million peas to win bet of $2.50
Life moved at a slower pace in Meddybemps, Maine back in 1922. Probably still does. According to Wikipedia, the 2010 census listed Meddybemps as having a population of only 157.
The Mancelona Herald – April 13, 1922 [Link]
Weird Universe » Alcohol Is Dynamite
[Link]
FMyLife » justinmdent says FML
Today, I helped a very large elderly man, who thanked me and tried to hand me a dollar bill. I kindly told him, "We are not allowed to accept tips from customers." His reply was, "You're going to take this fucking money," and shoved it in my pocket. I'm now being written up for it. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Things You'll Learn from Public Domain Review's New Book
We here at mental_floss are huge fans of the website Public Domain Review. Founded in 2011, the site contains a curated collection of the most interesting things in the public domain; its contributors publish essays on some of the cool things they find, a selection of which have been compiled into a new book. The Book of Selected Essays, 2011 … [Link]
FMyLife » StomachofTinfoil says FML
Today, I was elected to learn how to clean the birthing tub at the hospital I work at. Today, I also discovered that while blood doesn't bother me, floating chunks of afterbirth and god knows what else, will cause me to projectile vomit into said tub. Which I still had to clean afterwards. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » Corn Parts
[Link]
Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Castles for Sale
Looking for new digs? Here are seven stunning castles for sale in Europe.
*
The 8 People You Meet in a Screwball Comedy. You can still find examples of these in contemporary films, because they still work.
*
Being Skinny-Fat May Be Worse Than Being Fat. There’s a big difference between being a normal size and being fit.
*
21 Truly … [Link]
Mental Floss » Watch a Beautiful Time-Lapse of the Glowing Aurora Borealis
In this stunning video shot by SCIENTIFANTASTIC, you get a vivid, technicolor look at scenes from Iceland and Greenland. The footage took 10 days to shoot (four days in Iceland and six in Greenland) with a Panasonic. Probably the most impressive parts of the compilation are the night skies illuminated by the aurora borealis. These natural light displays are only … [Link]
Mental Floss » Why Don't Woodpeckers Get Brain Damage?
The lives and livelihoods of these birds revolve around slamming their heads into things. [Link]
Mental Floss » 6 Scientific Reasons Mondays Are the Worst
Have a case of the Mondays? Here's why. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Epileptic boy who would seize every 15 minutes and only had his condition worsen by taking an anti-seizure drug has been seizure free for 9 weeks thanks to medical cannabis oil donated by a dispensary as his insurance won't cover it [Spiffy]
[link] [58 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » America has been doing taxes wrong for 50 years. Economists say we should tax the rich at 90% [Obvious]
[link] [112 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Good Boy
In 1794 Haydn visited the singer Venanzio Rauzzini at Bath. In the garden of Rauzzini’s villa he noticed a monument to a much-loved dog named Turk, with the inscription TURK WAS A FAITHFUL DOG AND NOT A MAN. As a tribute he turned the text into a four-part canon: 
Rauzzini was so pleased that he had the music added to … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Panic grips South Korea as the government threatens to jail A) protesters B) jaywalkers or C) unauthorized 'selfie stick' retailers [Strange]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Australian mother charged with attempted dingo feeding [Sick]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » college student says FML
Today, I woke up with a vicious hangover. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't woken up to dozens of cans strewn all over the floor. I don't remember buying half the store's supply of pork and beans. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I held the door open for an old lady, before realizing she was a teacher taking 20-plus kids to lunch at local burger joint, all of whom got in front of me in the line to order. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman buys gun because she fears unrest in Ferguson. While in a car with boyfriend, she pulls out the gun to show that she is ready for unrest. Boyfriend, who was driving, ducks and hits another car. Gun goes off and kills woman. Ta da [Ironic]
[link] [347 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » California town restores Biblical Christmas displays built by Disneyland artisan and the recurring problems of stolen Jesus: "The one that replaced him had a mullet. It was really bad" [Spiffy]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 'If We Left, They Wouldn't Have Nobody' [Hero]
[link] [116 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » 404: fuck not given says FML
Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this heavy load [Photoshop]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Seattle mayor pardons tofurkey for Thanksgiving. Suck it, hungry people [Stupid]
[link] [41 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » British reindeer forced to keep holiday schedule a secret to stay one step ahead of animal-rights activists [Asinine]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
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