John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Porn star Belle Knox writes article about prostitution and you already clicked [Interesting]

Sunday 16 November 23:30:17 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [151 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Andy Warhol's "Triple Elvis" painting sells for $82 Million. Artists rave about the colors, the realism, the paint mixed with maple syrup [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 23:21:07 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ferguson official: 'I know the witness says it's Darren Wilson, I know the police report says it's Darren Wilson and I know the video shows Darren Wilson, but it's not Darren Wilson arresting a man on his own property for recording Da

Sunday 16 November 21:02:31 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [226 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » CNN excited to have a purpose again as the search begins anew for MH17 wreckage in the Ukraine [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 20:45:38 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 10,000-year-old cave paintings depicting aliens and UFOs discovered in India. "Extensive research is needed for further findings," says archaeologist [Obvious]

Sunday 16 November 20:20:28 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Unlicensed, sixteen year old girl cited for driving wrong way on I-93 and I-293. FARK: At speeds reaching 118 MPH [Dumbass]

Sunday 16 November 19:59:34 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man pleads guilty to possession to nine pence of cannabis. Lawyer: "If I close my eyes and try to imagine nine hundredths of a gram it is a very difficult thing to fasten my mind on. I think it is a quantity that is barely capable of measurement&

Sunday 16 November 19:57:37 UTC 2014

Stupid [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » News of the Weird, November 16, 2014

Sunday 16 November 19:42:29 UTC 2014

News of the Weird
Weirdnuz.M397, November 16, 2014
Copyright 2014 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.

Lead Story

The Other World Series: In October, another premier world sports events reached its climax, with one team left standing, rewarded for months of grueling practices, to the cheers of adoring, frenzied fans. The “world series” of professional team computer games was settled … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Winter hits the Midwest, and its effects are most clear on the streets of Chiraq, where only three people were killed and fifteen wounded in citywide gun violence this weekend [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 18:43:56 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [121 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Unquote

Sunday 16 November 18:20:42 UTC 2014

“People who make history know nothing about history. You can see that in the sort of history they make.” — G.K. Chesterton [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man tells car full of idiots to stop doing donuts as there were children nearby. Sadly, you can pretty easily guess what happened next [Florida]

Sunday 16 November 17:48:24 UTC 2014

Florida [link] [94 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Medical marijuana is a ruse. It makes you slow, it makes you stupid, and once you get bored with it you'll be more prone to experiment with more dangerous drugs such as cocaine and heroin" [Obvious]

Sunday 16 November 17:34:59 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [230 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Black Friday is dead. LONG LIVE BLACK WEEK [PSA]

Sunday 16 November 17:30:03 UTC 2014

PSA [link] [94 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Salt Lake City police are having a problem with naked, un-tased dudes walking around the city, but they're on it [Strange]

Sunday 16 November 16:29:14 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Couple takes their seven-month-old baby along during burglary spree. Well, at least they didn't leave the kid sitting in a hot car [Fail]

Sunday 16 November 16:23:58 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [20 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » California DMV now expanding hours to meet the demand of immigrants seeking licenses. Employees to go from working 25 minutes a day to an entire half hour [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 15:10:08 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [104 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Old and Busted: Turning old grocery store buildings into another grocery store. New Hotness: Turning old grocery store buildings into schools, entertainment centers and even health clubs [Interesting]

Sunday 16 November 15:06:02 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How George Eastman Revolutionized Photography

Sunday 16 November 15:00:00 UTC 2014

In 1885, George Eastman introduced "film" in a form we would recognize today—a roll of photographic emulsion that could be run through a camera. (It did use paper as its backing, which was problematic, but still, roughly the same idea we continued to use for more than a hundred years.) Prior to Eastman's invention, the typical method for making a … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Protip: Never use gasoline to start bonfires [Florida]

Sunday 16 November 14:43:09 UTC 2014

Florida [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Of all the dickish things a cop can do, pulling a car out of a funeral procession to give them a $230 ticket is right up there. Doubly so when it's a soldier escorting a fallen comrade. Triply so on Remembrance Day. WTF, Canada? [Asinine]

Sunday 16 November 14:32:16 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [116 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ISIS claims another beheading [News]

Sunday 16 November 14:03:12 UTC 2014

News [link] [197 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this lonely landing stage [Photoshop]

Sunday 16 November 14:00:01 UTC 2014

Photoshop [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » March of the Donkeychimp

Sunday 16 November 13:41:51 UTC 2014

By the American musician Ralph Carney. I hadn't heard of him before stumbling upon this odd video, but apparently he's considered "an integral part of the indie music scene," and has collaborated with artists such as Tom Waits, the B-52s, and The Black Keys. There's a documentary about him in the works, titled "This is Ralph Carney."

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » So you think you're a player because you can tell your Spam from Treet or Prem? But what about Byblos? What about Assi? Unium? Ligo? Al Haloub Cow? This is your guide to spam-like products [Interesting]

Sunday 16 November 13:20:11 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [49 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Nervine

Sunday 16 November 13:05:59 UTC 2014

What exactly were the ingredients of Nervine that made it sell effectively for many decades?

Read all about it here. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oh my God, they found me. I don't know how, but they found me [Cool]

Sunday 16 November 12:04:41 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [100 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Sunday 16 November 9:22:48 UTC 2014

Today, my boyfriend and I compared our No Shave November body hair. This is how I found out that my legs are hairier than his. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Group of citizen journalists want everyone to know that the photo going around showing flight MH17 being shot down over the Ukraine is a fake. They can tell by some of the pixels and from having seen a few shops in their time (Some Not safe for work

Sunday 16 November 9:21:20 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [45 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bowling can be a fun family activity. That is, until mom accidentally spills her drink, which leads to an argument with a bunch of girls in the next lane, which in turn leads to dad getting his ear bitten off by some crazy guy [Scary]

Sunday 16 November 9:14:08 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You thought your grandma was a badass? Hell naw son, Baddie Winkle is a badass: "she's also fond of Hip Hop, twerking and the legalisation of marijuana" [Cool]

Sunday 16 November 8:42:42 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [19 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » SeaBind says FML

Sunday 16 November 8:41:19 UTC 2014

Today, a friend wanted to show me a game he bragged he was the best at. I beat his score on the first try, and now I have a black eye to prove it. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Sunday 16 November 8:28:50 UTC 2014

Today, I asked my dad for advice. I recently got drunk and had a one-night stand. I feel terrible, because I'm engaged to a wonderful lady. My dad just said, "You did the right thing, son, keep it up. She's gonna steal half ya shit in the divorce anyway". FML [Link]

FMyLife » Slow_Walker says FML

Sunday 16 November 7:29:03 UTC 2014

Today, I was watching The Walking Dead while in bed, when I heard a noise in the kitchen. I told myself I was just imagining things. Several hours later, as I was getting ready for sleep, I found out I'd actually been robbed. FML [Link]

FMyLife » UH60 says FML

Sunday 16 November 7:28:00 UTC 2014

Today, I have an Army fitness test. I was worried I'd cramp up during the last mile of the run, so I drank a large amount of water in preparation. I later woke up in the very small barracks that I share with three other people, soaking in a puddle of my own piss. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Most forms of therapy do not include hugging and kissing and getting naked with your counselor [Obvious]

Sunday 16 November 6:52:18 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Police stop truck, make offal discovery [Sick]

Sunday 16 November 6:30:21 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [26 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Black and White

Sunday 16 November 6:21:29 UTC 2014

By Sam Loyd. White to mate in two moves. Click for solution … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Coming up at the top of the hour, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of live music from Juneau, Alaska hosted by a farker [Cool]

Sunday 16 November 5:58:45 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [322 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » ISIS declares its intent to invade Saudi Arabia, House of Saud now wondering if spending 20 years funding Islamic extremists may have been counterproductive [Interesting]

Sunday 16 November 5:17:52 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [143 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Less than a month after 4 pit bulls break into a neighbor's yard and kill a 10-year-old beagle, a lawsuit has been filed… by the owner of the pit bulls [Stupid]

Sunday 16 November 5:08:57 UTC 2014

Stupid [link] [125 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Mom gets 78-year sentence for waterboarding her own children. In other news, George W. Bush is spending his retirement painting [Sick]

Sunday 16 November 4:46:23 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Someone paid over $1,500 for one of those ET Atari cartridges pulled from a New Mexico landfill [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 4:44:11 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pennsylvania state troopers worked twelve hour days and racked up $6 million in overtime alone to catch accused cop killer Eric Frein. Hopefully taxpayers will be paid restitution by the criminal [Followup]

Sunday 16 November 4:34:27 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [75 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cheesy black face characters provoke protests in the Netherlands [Stupid]

Sunday 16 November 3:58:45 UTC 2014

Stupid [link] [33 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cops called to to school over a student bringing in a dangerous weapon….confetti [Fail]

Sunday 16 November 3:58:33 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Obama encounters Australian wildlife, survives [Spiffy]

Sunday 16 November 3:47:47 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ewe think ewe got problems [Dumbass]

Sunday 16 November 3:47:26 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [17 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You, your wife, and your mistress are seriously worried about the overpopulation of the earth, coincidentally you are all also very hungry for delicious empadas. If only there was some way to tackle both of these vexing problems at the same time [Sic

Sunday 16 November 3:32:40 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » For today's feel good story: Man takes out $520K mortgage and defaults. Bank files foreclosure. Judge rules that foreclosure filing is past the statute of limitations. Man keeps house. Bank eats shiat [Cool]

Sunday 16 November 3:28:00 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [96 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » back to cock-hunting says FML

Sunday 16 November 2:12:07 UTC 2014

Today, on our second date, the unemployed guy I'm seeing tried to convince me to open a joint bank account in our name. FML [Link]

FMyLife » ChimerV says FML

Sunday 16 November 2:12:06 UTC 2014

Today, a customer limped over to me in one of the dishwasher aisles and asked if we sold dishwashers. I said yes and pointed at all the dishwashers. He looked around for a couple of seconds, belched, then said "Oh… right!" and walked off. No commission for me, then. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Here is a sampling of the world's best street food, since we all like to grab and go once in a while [Interesting]

Sunday 16 November 1:52:37 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why wait for CNN to post the scare headline "Is Polio back?" CDC reports 75 US kids paralyzed by mystery polio-like disease. Very, very scary Doctor Bill [Scary]

Sunday 16 November 1:32:25 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [62 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » What is your favorite Christmas song? [Survey]

Sunday 16 November 1:31:39 UTC 2014

Survey [link] [237 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » You're eating too much chocolate, fatass, and we're about to run out of it as a result [Dumbass]

Sunday 16 November 1:11:37 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [68 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this handsome face [Photoshop]

Sunday 16 November 1:00:01 UTC 2014

Photoshop [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Magistrate thinks insurance companies may not have been entirely honest handling Sandy flood claims, is still unsure if they were 100% fraudulent or only 99% [Obvious]

Sunday 16 November 0:36:59 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [16 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Sunday 16 November 0:23:32 UTC 2014

Today, while driving to my daughter's wedding, the person behind us kept laying on her horn and yelling every time I stopped for a red light. That person was my wife. Sadly I'm too whipped to stand up to her and spent the whole drive pretending not to hear my passengers snickering at me. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis to install showers for the homeless in St. Peter's Square [Cool]

Sunday 16 November 0:20:35 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [90 comments] [Link]

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