Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » idonthaveauserna says FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted than he's been using Febreze instead of showering for the past month. FML [Link]
Futility Closet » Unquote
“You can tell the character of every man when you see how he gives and receives praise.” — Seneca “To learn a man’s character, mark how he takes a favour.” — Archbishop Richard Whately “If all else fails, the character of a man can be recognized by nothing so surely as by a jest which he takes badly.” — G.C. … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Islamic ninja bank robber strikes again [Strange]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 'Columbus teachers, remember that Performance Bonus you were paid for the 2010-2011 school year? Yeah, we're gonna need that money back' [Asinine]
[link] [168 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Congress Waiting Until After Midterms To Address Nationwide Plague Of Hornets
WASHINGTON—Saying they don’t want to act too hastily on an issue that deserves a robust and thorough debate, congressional leaders announced Thursday they will wait until after the midterm elections to address the nation’s ongoing plague… 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you're going to try to steal a bottle of wine from a supermarket, don't knock yourself unconscious on a shelf as you try to run away [Amusing]
[link] [24 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Insane Asylums, Prisons and a Meatpacking Plant—the 10 Most Terrifying Haunted Houses
As Halloween approaches, don’t be satisfied with your usual trick-or-treating or just some neighborhood fright-house. Go big at some of these top 10 creepiest, scariest, and most scream-inducing mega-haunted houses across the United States. Staged inside everything from an old prison to a meatpacking plant and an insane asylum, some of these haunted houses would be scary even without the … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » …why the long face? [Amusing]
[link] [55 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Remember that deputy that was rushed to the isolation ward because of suspected Ebola? It's starting to look like he just had some bad sushi [Followup]
[link] [79 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Artist etches a 656-foot-long Ebola virus into a crop field, says it wasn't much of a strain [Spiffy]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Paul Feig To Make All-Female ‘Ghostbusters’
Paul Feig, who directed the 2011 comedy smash hit Bridesmaids, announced via Twitter that he is set to make a new Ghostbusters film that will feature a female-led cast. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fark Food Thread: Let's revisit Regional Food.. what are your favorite regional recipes that you just love to dive into? Difficulty: not the region you are in right now [Interesting]
[link] [260 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman injured in Glasgow hit-and-run. Glasgow police urge people to focus on the positive. For example, no one stole her shoes [Amusing]
[link] [12 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Sleepy says FML
Today, I fell asleep at my desk. It's bad enough that it was for 45 minutes and that I was snoring. What makes it worse? My boss woke me up. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: The Worst Cars Ever
Wikimedia Commons Pile of Junk These are the 10 worst cars of the 20th century. * Fold & Fly I’m not a huge gun person, but I do tend to love a gun that can create and fire paper airplanes. * The Kid’s Got Game A 5-year-old with cancer got to live his dream by putting on a Utah Jazz … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Alex Trebek: "I'll take 'Regretting I did an infomercial' for $500" [Stupid]
[link] [59 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Where Are They Now? The Cast of 'Twin Peaks'
It was announced on Monday that Twin Peaks will return for a nine-episode run on Showtime. Considering David Lynch is known for working with the same people over and over again, it’s worth asking: Which original cast members might return? Let’s take a look at where they are now. 1. Kyle MacLachlan – Special Agent Dale Cooper 
Getty Images MacLachlan … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 'Go with the flow' campaign urges people to pee in the shower. Rival 'Heel it down the drain' program not as successful [Strange]
[link] [179 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this super cool stick bug [Photoshop]
[link] [26 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Don't you hate it when your wife blames minorities for the downfall of America in a Facebook post and you have to take out a full-page ad in the local paper to apologize? Yeah, me too [Stupid]
[link] [178 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Beer, snooker and billiards can help you live forever [Cool]
[link] [10 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: Where Is Kim Jong-Un?
North Korean supreme leader Kim Jong-un has not been seen in public since September 3. Here is the latest speculation on his whereabouts 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Australian woman lost in bush for seventeen days. This would never happen in Brazil [Interesting]
[link] [60 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Good news: marijuana-infused soft drinks exist. Bad news: they're exploding on the store shelves [Sad]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » After a similarly designed solar power plant in NV has been shown to incinerate birds in mid-flight, company drops plans to build a second n in CA rather than showing some gumption and opening a "rotisserie wild bird" side business [Sad]
[link] [83 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Pastor Always Knew Agnostic Would Come Crawling Back To Church For Wedding
LAKE FOREST, IL—Saying he was not the least bit surprised to see the former member of the congregation again, pastor James Bower told reporters Thursday that he always knew agnostic local resident Chris Parker would come crawling back to the church … 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Bride-to-be who had sex with midget stripper on hen do confesses after giving birth to dwarf son." Wow. This headline has EVERYTHING [Cool]
[link] [186 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » There are some things you don't do in life: You don't tug on Superman's cape. You don't spit in the wind. And you don't harass and antagonize the bears in the Yukon by pouring water on them [Stupid]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » It's an old time revival in the churches of Detroit as the call goes out for flash mob style 'Mass Mobs' to fill the pews to bring the masses together in the old churches [Interesting]
[link] [13 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Good parents know how to say "no" to their kids, with a helpful picture of a skeptical child [Interesting]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Report: Increasing Number Of U.S. Toddlers Attending Online Preschool
WASHINGTON—Saying the option is revolutionizing the way the nation’s 3- and 4-year-olds prepare for the grade school years ahead, a Department of Education report released Thursday confirmed that an increasing number of U.S. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » 90-year-old woman caught growing marijuana: "I just thought they were nice plants" [Hero]
[link] [41 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » There's skinny vodak, there's Coors Light and now there's mild marijuana for novices [Cool]
[link] [53 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Person driving a city vehicle hits own car. Fark: Now suing the city for damages [Asinine]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Her lawyer says he'll seek compensation for injury to her feelings" – Oh Canada [Dumbass]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Doesn't it seem like Christmas season starts earlier and earlier each year? [Asinine]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » ♫Rollin' rollin' rollin', Keep those Islamists goin', Rollin' Rollin' Rollin', AIRSTRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKES♫ [Followup]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Fan Vows To Donate Brain Subjected To Hundreds Of Titans Games
BRENTWOOD, TN—Expressing confidence that his act will expand neurological research and ultimately improve the welfare of others in his position, local 52-year-old Luke Holman, who has been subjected to hundreds of Tennessee Titans games for over a d… 
[Link]
The Onion » Man Takes Parents On Tour Of City Where He Came To Escape Them
PORTLAND, OR—Pointing out the Portland Art Museum and the farmers market in Shemanski Park as he guided them around downtown, area 25-year-old Daniel Hurst reportedly spent Thursday afternoon taking his visiting parents on a tour of the city he expr… 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » WSJ drone writes article droning on about drone industry's dislike of the term "drone." Drone [Amusing]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cash-strapped Canadian military going ahead with tests to determine if surface ships can be refitted as submarines [Unlikely]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » A Brief History of 125 Years of Nintendo
This year marks the 125th anniversary of Nintendo, the beloved Japanese video game company responsible for a whole slew of consoles that you’ve probably played more times than you can count (or are willing to admit—it’s okay, we love Mario, too). One hundred and twenty-five years is certainly a big birthday, especially for a company best known for their forward-thinking … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Had a great morning? Want to keep that good vibe going all afternoon? Here, check out Oklahoma's new death chamber [Scary]
[link] [64 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » There's hypnotic therapy, and there's sexual healing. Try not to get the two mixed up [Sick]
[link] [32 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nope.Nope.Nope .NopeNope. NopeNope .NopeNope .NopeNope .NopeNope. Nope [Scary]
[link] [128 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Owner's Box: Ben Roethlisberger Struggling With New City Ordinance That Allows Food Trucks On Field
Ben Roethlisberger is struggling to maintain focus after a new city ordinance started allowing food trucks on the field. 
[Link]
The Onion » Report: Many Companies Now Offering Women Permanent, Unpaid Maternity Leave
WASHINGTON—As part of a nationwide effort to accommodate women in the workplace, many U.S. companies are now offering female employees permanent, unpaid maternity leave, according to a Pew Research Center survey released Thursday. 
[Link]
Mental Floss » Beer from Fossils…Gross or Awesome?
In this tongue-in-cheek video, NPR explores the history of life on Earth, viewed through the lens of beer. It's the true story of fossil hunter Jason Osborne, who worked with brewer/microbiologist Jasper Akerboom, to make beer using yeast collected from a 35-million-year-old proto-whale fossil found in a Virginia swamp. Dubbed "Bone Dusters Paleo Ale," NPR's Adam Cole reports, "It tasted … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » White cop kills black teenager in St Louis #tbt [Sad]
[link] [423 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When you're a pastor, you probably shouldn't preach a sermon about how you have sex on church grounds, have HIV, do drugs and take money from the church [Asinine]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 35 Awesome Halloween Costumes for Senior Citizens
You're never too old for Halloween. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Signs and symptoms of depression include: *Feelings of helplessness. *Appetite or weight changes. *Pimping underage hookers [Strange]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Mortician on fantasy vs. reality of running a crematorium: "And there's so much of it that it can, when you're taking it out of the machine, get on you and get into strange little places that you didn't even know you had" [Interes
[link] [92 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 10 Insane Buildings Currently Under Construction
Vincent Callebaut Architectures If these wild, under-construction buildings are any indication, the future is near, and it will be extremely tall and draped in glass. 1. Kingdom Tower 
Wikimedia Commons Set to dwarf the world’s tallest building—the United Arab Emirates’ Burj Khalifa—by over 550 feet, Saudi Arabia’s Kingdom Tower will be the planet’s first building to top a kilometer in … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » There's a reason most cities don't use highly-polished, massive steel orbs as public sculpture. Then there's Calgary, which is setting its citizens on fire with light reflected off them [Fail]
[link] [97 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Swarm of Nopes attack 4 people, kill 1. This thread is full of bees [Scary]
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Brain Game: Three in a Row
Good luck with today's mentalfloss.com Brain Game Think Thursday challenge: The most recent instance when THREE consecutive
U.S. presidents were members of the same political party
occurred nearly 100 years ago. Name this trio. Here is the SOLUTION. [Link]
FMyLife » MoRuined says FML
Today, I found my first grey hair. How? My boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to point it out. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Unlike Walmart, Costco has no plans to cut employee health benefits [Spiffy]
[link] [222 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Humans, it's just a matter of time before the spiders learn how to sharpen tools into weapons before they come at us now that they've advanced to the stone age [Scary]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Statshot: What Have We Grown Out Of?
What Have We Grown Out Of? 
[Link]
The Onion » Infographic: What You Need To Know About Ebola
Following the death of the first person diagnosed with Ebola in the United States, concerns about the deadly hemorrhagic virus are running high throughout the country. 
[Link]
The Onion » Infographic: What You Need To Know About Ebola
Following the death of the first person diagnosed with Ebola in the United States, concerns about the deadly hemorrhagic virus are running high throughout the country. 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Thai traffic cops offered cash to turn down bribes. I don't think someone has thought this cunning plan through [Asinine]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » bees says FML
Today, I was mowing my grandma's lawn when I was suddenly swarmed by bees. When my grandma saw me covered in stings later on, she said, "Oh yeah, there are tons of bees in the grass! Be careful!" FML [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Questions: "Ex"amination
[Link]
Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Spirograph Pancakes
Pancake artist Nathan Shields shows us how he makes Spirocakes, or Spirograph Pancakes. They come complete with lovely lacy holes to hold more maple syrup.
*
This 60 Second Film Will Terrify You Into Never Looking Under The Bed, Ever Again. Nothing will jump out at you, but you’ll have to wonder what you’d do in this situation.
*
Calculating … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Comer Cottrell, who invented the cheap home Jheri curl kit, has passed away. Doctors say his ethereal form was radiating visible spectrum light waves [Sad]
[link] [43 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hackers find the Konami code for ATMs [Interesting]
[link] [48 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Area Man Self-Conscious About All The Wrong Things
MANASSAS, VA—Noting that he’s frequently anxious and embarrassed by his most minor personality quirks and modest physical imperfections, sources confirmed Thursday that local sales associate Walter Markowitz is self-conscious about the complet… 
[Link]
Weird Universe » Who’s responsible?
Megan Campbell's parked car was hit by a van driven by a city worker, so now she wants the city to pay for the damages. Sounds reasonable. But Campbell was the city worker driving the van that hit her own car. The city is reviewing the incident. [twincities.com]
I'm pretty sure Chuck has posted about similar cases in the past. … [Link]
Futility Closet » Black and White
A chess problem by Paul Morphy. White to mate in two moves. Click for solution … [Link]
Mental Floss » Why Do Dead Whales Explode?
Decomposing corpses bloat with gases like methane and hydrogen sulfide, which have to find their way out one way or another. If a whale dies at sea, scavengers such as sharks might relieve the pressure by munching at the skin, but if a whale washes up on shore, the animal’s weight can cause any open orifices to seal up. Exacerbated … [Link]
The Onion » Statshot: What Have We Grown Out Of?
What Have We Grown Out Of? 
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Kickstarter Fundraisers Debut $150 Computer
After their Kickstarter campaign raised $1.5 million for the project, a group of entrepreneurs have released Kano, a $150 computer intended for young people aged 6 to 14 that provides owners the materials needed to assemble and code their own customized m… 
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you're keeping track of "O.J. Simpson dying in prison stories," add this one to your list [Interesting]
[link] [101 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this tennis ball eye [Photoshop]
[link] [18 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » CDC: "By the end of the year, there's supposed to be 1.4 million people infected with Ebola and 62 percent of them dying,.. there is no way we can keep Ebola [contained] in West Africa" [Scary]
[link] [421 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Komen Fracks Itself [Fail]
[link] [133 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Actors Who Have Played Their Own Twin
Yes, you’re seeing double. Sort of. [Link]
Weird Universe » Appreciating Our Parents
Insidious adult-slanted propaganda! [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Turns out you shouldn't have a lit candle in the car when you pump gas. Who knew? [Florida]
[link] [89 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I started at a new school. It's a pretty great school, but there's only one problem: Everybody thinks I'm a teacher. I'm only a freshman. FML [Link]
FMyLife » thenegatives says FML
Today, my son was smart enough to hack the school's computers to change his midterm, but isn't smart enough to actually keep his grades up. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » Mornbing Cup of Links: Spirograph Pancakes
Pancake artist Nathan Shields shows us how he makes Spirocakes, or Spirograph Pancakes. They come complete with lovely lacy holes to hold more maple syrup.
*
This 60 Second Film Will Terrify You Into Never Looking Under The Bed, Ever Again. Nothing will jump out at you, but you’ll have to wonder what you’d do in this situation.
*
Calculating … [Link]
FMyLife » xRyu says FML
Today, I found out via a voicemail from my boss that my hours are being cut. He said, "They said I can't fire you, so you'll only be getting 20 hours a week. Starting today." Who'd they give my other 20 hours to? The one person that calls off sick almost daily and is never on time. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hey, is that your Bugatti Veyron 16.4 Grand Sport parked there? Be a shame if someone spray painted a big ol' penis on it [Amusing]
[link] [405 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Extremely rare 8ft 1in, 221 lb albino catfish will be even better when breaded and cooked at 375 degrees [Unlikely]
[link] [54 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Emotion and Belief
If you had to judge by bodily sensations alone, could you distinguish shame from embarrassment? Philosopher William Alston suggests that we need to consult our beliefs in order to do this. “Even if there are in fact subtle differences in the patterns of bodily sensation associated with the two, it seems that what in fact forms the basis of the … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Good news: We're living longer than ever before. Bad News: We're living longer than ever before [Interesting]
[link] [77 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Theme of Farktography Contest No. 492: "Hobbies". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme [Farktography]
[link] [69 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 100 Amazing Facts Everyone Should Know
Store these away for future trivia nights. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Harvard students: The U.S. is a greater threat to the world than ISIS [Stupid]
[link] [297 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Goat jumps off roof, kills kid [Sad]
[link] [59 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The Pentagon doesn't know what to call the operation against ISIS. This is where you come in. It should be called Operation _______________ [Interesting]
[link] [502 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Author offers $500,000 in solid gold to anyone who can solve the puzzle in his new fantasy book. Now where did I put that decoder ring? [Cool]
[link] [79 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » You have until October 31 to send your name, country, postal code, and email address to NASA, who will put the information on a microchip that will eventually land on Mars [PSA]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nobody panic yet, but there might be a second probable case of Ebola in Dallas [Followup]
[link] [241 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Not news: Man posts a photo of himself eating a turkey leg from the state fair to Facebook. Fark: He's locked up in state prison [Interesting]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 9 Female Warriors Who Made Their Mark On History
They were mothers, sisters, daughters, and wives. But above all these women were warriors. All across time, and all around the globe, they brandished swords and guns, fought battles, and faced off with royalty. Though outnumbered by their bands of brothers in battle, these fearsome female fighters have each made an indelible mark on history. 1. ARTEMISIA I OF CARIA … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Looking for Bigfoot in the Pacific Northwest? Look in the sky, instead [Strange]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Turns out college students learned financial acumen from college administrators [Dumbass]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this Type-A foot bridge [Photoshop]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
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