Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, this girl I've been talking to texted me, saying she was going to visit. Trying to be sweet, I bought her $50 worth of chocolate and a cute card. Turns out she meant to send that text to her ex. Seems like the only thing I'll get from this relationship is diabetes. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Maine
1. Maine is the only state that borders just one other state—New Hampshire. 2. Maine’s Machias Seal Island and North Rock in the Gulf of Maine are among the four areas of disputed territory between the United States and Canada, and the only ones that contain land. The disagreement stems from dueling interpretations of the 1783 Treaty of Paris, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Fifteen new laws that have taken effect this month in Fark's favorite state [Florida]
[link] [72 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Taste of Africa Dallas? Too soon? [Fail]
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Fark.com RSS » Senior Taliban official denies being in Pakistan after failing to realize he had "location enabled" on his Twitter app [Dumbass]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Today is the 100th anniversary of the first air combat victory. It was by a Frenchman. Bonus: the cape [Cool]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Lousiana
1. La Louisiane, named for Louis XIV of France, became a French colony in 1682 and passed to Spain in 1763. It was ceded back to France in 1800 and became part of the United States following the Louisiana Purchase of 1803. 2. Louisiana might be the biggest bargain in American history. In 1803, the U.S. paid $15 million for … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hipsters now embracing "Dumb Phones" in an attempt to resemble this headline's tag [Ironic]
[link] [203 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, the guy I really like acknowledged my existence for the first time. Too bad it was through a text saying "lol ur a fat fukc". FML [Link]
FMyLife » fucksake says FML
Today, at age 31, I was about to finally lose my virginity. As we tumbled onto the bed, an excruciating pain shot through my stomach. It turned out to be a hernia, and no, I didn't get laid in the end. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you…" then abruptly shat my pants. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Not news: You give money to a panhandler every day. News: The 78-year-old woman claims to be a widow and can't afford food. Fark: Only to find out that her car is better than yours (with video) [Strange]
[link] [196 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Hawaii
1. There are only 13 letters in the Hawaiian alphabet and every word—and syllable—ends with one of five vowels. 2. That apostrophe-like mark you see in some Hawaiian words is called an ʻokina. It's a consonant that signifies a slight pause. If two words seem to be spelled exactly alike, but one has an ʻokina, you're looking at two different … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Illinois
1. Illinois gets its name from the native Illiniwek people. The name translates to "ordinary speaker." 2. The state is the country's largest producer of pumpkins, second-largest producer of corn, and leading producer of arguments about whether or not ketchup is an acceptable condiment for a hot dog. 3. Speaking of Chicago's signature delicacies, if you're in the neighborhood, try … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Indiana
1. Though it is seldom mentioned in the comic strip or cartoon series, "Garfield" takes place in Muncie. The television special Happy Birthday, Garfield mentions Muncie — where creator Jim Davis went to college — as Garfield and owner Jon Arbuckle’s place of residence. 2. Indiana sits atop one of the richest concentrations of limestone on the planet, and prides … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Your childhood continues to die: Swings removed from Washington school because "they're too dangerous" [Sad]
[link] [134 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Kentucky
1. Kentucky Bend is an odd little geographic quirk of the state. At the far southwestern tip of Kentucky, the tiny exclave of Fulton County sits in a meander of the Mississippi River. As an exclave, it’s a portion of Kentucky that doesn’t touch any other part of the state. Kentucky Bend is bordered by Tennessee to the south and … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Idaho
1. Idaho's known for its potatoes, but its official nickname is the Gem State. Some 72 different precious and semi-precious gemstones have been found there. 2. One of them is the star garnet. It's only found in abundance in two places in the world: Idaho and India. 3. Idaho also supplies the majority of the nation's trout. 4. Wondering how … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop what's missing from this horizon [Photoshop]
[link] [36 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The authorities have misplaced someone who had contact with the Ebola patient in Texas. Prepare to panic in 3…2… [Followup]
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Fark.com RSS » Chicago clearly isn't going to worry about Ebola or even give it consideration, as twenty-two were shot this weekend and three were killed in the plague of constant weekend gun violence that would make even ISIS embarrassed [Followup]
[link] [128 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » That patient who was "cured" of Ebola in Omaha? Yeah, he's back in isolation in Massachusetts. So everybody…remain calm and try not to touch any bodily fluids that aren't your own [Followup]
[link] [78 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » For the third time this week, NYPD officer fatally shoots Knife-Wielding Man [Scary]
[link] [66 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Don't you just hate pledge week? Pledge conference in Cairo next week seeks $4 billion to rebuild Gaza. "And with a gift of $100 million, you get the Best of Tareq Abboushi and your choice of a ten pound box of figs, or dates" [Sad]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Florida
1. The first Thanksgiving might have actually been celebrated in Florida, not Plymouth. In The Cross in the Sand, historian Michael Gannon argues that a Spanish explorer celebrated a version of Thanksgiving with Timacua Indians in 1565—56 years before the first feast at Plymouth. Guests reportedly dined on bean soup. 2. In 1998, Florida passed a law requiring daycare centers … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » A master's degreed Sea World biologist with no criminal record has been sent to prison for twenty years after firing a warning shot at a teen thug coming at his wife and daughters in his own house. Stand your ground, my ass [Florida]
[link] [312 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Actual headline: "World porridge champion hails his spurtle." With pic of world porridge champion hailing his spurtle (SFW spurtle pics) [Strange]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » College students break the record for world's largest pillow fight. It's not as hot as you'd expect, but definitely a lot of fun [Spiffy]
[link] [14 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Delaware
1. As anyone from the state will proudly tell you, Delaware was the first state: it was the first to ratify the Constitution, in 1787. 2. Delaware is simultaneously the sixth most densely populated state and the sixth least populated state. This has to do with its small size—Delaware is only 1,983 square miles, making it the second smallest state … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Georgia
1. Georgia was founded in 1732 by British Member of Parliament James Oglethorpe as a felon colony. Oglethorpe wanted to use the colony as a place for prisoners who could not pay their debts. The social reformer believed that many debtors were released back into cities without any form of support. He wanted to take these people and give them … [Link]
Mental Floss » Weekend Links: Old Book Smell
Thank you, chemical degradation, for that sweet, distinctive "old book smell." * The math involved in calculating "dog years" versus "human years" doesn't add up. * Nothing tastes of fall quite like the first crisp bite into a fresh apple, but try branching out from the typical Red Delicious with a more exciting variety of the best apples for eating … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » I'll see your $30 school lunch bill costing $800, and raise with a $115 photocopying bill costing $200,000 [Stupid]
[link] [82 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » News of the Weird (October 5, 2014)
News of the Weird
Weirdnuz.M391, October 5, 2014
Copyright 2014 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.
Lead Story
Professional Biology Research: The job of determining stress levels in whales is itself apparently stressful. The most reliable information about tension lies in hormones most accurately measured by researchers’ boarding a boat and sidling up to a whale and waiting until it … [Link]
Weird Universe » Buttleopener forces resignation
Mark Gregory invented the Buttleopener, which is a bottle opener shaped like a woman's buttocks. Gregory also served as a member of the Williamson County school board in Tennessee, recently rising to become chairman. But the two aspects of his life (buttleopener inventor and school board chairman) have proven to be incompatible. Gregory recently resigned his position as chairman, bowing … [Link]
FMyLife » SadMother says FML
Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The airline passenger at Newark turned out to be having symptoms that were not related to Ebola. Everybody dis-panic [Followup]
[link] [90 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this castle in the woods [Photoshop]
[link] [13 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » A Brief History of Honeybee Colony Collapse
In early 2007, beekeepers in the U.S. began to notice an alarming problem: their bees were disappearing. In many cases, colonies would empty out overnight, the workers abandoning their posts, leaving the queen alone (or nearly so). In the years since, scientists and beekeepers have worked together to isolate the causes of what we now call "Colony Collapse Disorder." Although … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Investigation finds that the only thing worse than prison food is hospital food. Ric Romero nods approvingly, orders takeout [Obvious]
[link] [38 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Doctor to patient: The x-ray shows an acupuncture needle in your stomach. When did you last have acupuncture? Patient: 40 years ago [Scary]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Colorado
1. Colorado is known as the Centennial State because it was founded in 1876—100 years after the signing of the Declaration of Independence. 2. Many restaurants claim to have invented the cheeseburger, but it was Colorado resident Louis Ballast of the Humpty Dumpty Drive-In in Denver who named it. (He tried to trademark the term in 1935 but was denied.) … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Alcohol damages sperm…Blah… blah… blah… WTF… Danish men must provide a sperm sample to be deemed fit to serve in the military? [Strange]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » American Cornball
Christopher Miller's new book is a must-have for any WU-vie, detailing with comprehensive wit all the old humor tropes that once delighted millions, but are now just plain weird, but with a residual underlying universality.
Read a sample here.
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Officials said the captain of the bubble, Reza Baluchi, was asking which way Bermuda was" [Florida]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Russian student seeks asylum in the U.S., so Soviet Union says no more exchange students, nyet, not yours [Obvious]
[link] [74 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Artist who who creates 'invisible art' turns out to be her own masterpiece [Ironic]
[link] [85 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If your Comcast security system does not activate, please have the intruders reset the system and remain at the residence until a technician arrives, usually between the hours of 9 and 5 [Scary]
[link] [97 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Connecticut
1. The word “Connecticut” is an anglicized spelling of the Algonquian word “quinnitukqut,” roughly meaning “at the long tidal river.” 2. Connecticut is officially known as the Constitution State, referring to the state government-establishing Fundamental Orders of Connecticut. Written in 1639, the Fundamental Orders is considered history's first written constitution. Connecticut is also known as the "Nutmeg State." Traditionally, sailors … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bachelorette party goes off the rails after the bridesmaids attack a woman over how she held a hot dog [Silly]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Catch as Catch Can
Claude Shannon, the father of information theory, took an active interest in juggling. He used to juggle balls while riding a unicycle through the halls of Bell Laboratories, and he built the first juggling robot from an Erector set in the 1970s. (The machine above mimics W.C. Fields, who himself juggled in vaudeville before turning to comedy.) Noting that juggling … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Arkansas
1. Arkansas prides itself for being the world capital of a variety of things, including quartz (this honor is attributed specifically to the Mount Ida area), spinach (Alma), folk music (Mountain View), and archery bow production (Pine Bluff). 2. As of July 2014, Camden, Arkansas is home to the oldest living American and second-oldest living person in the world. Born in 1898, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Authorities quickly stop slow, inexorable giant snail invasion [Florida]
[link] [46 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Arizona
1. Texas might lay claim to NASA, and Nevada to the mysterious Area 51, but Arizona has its share of achievements in the outer space game. Pluto was discovered from the Lowell Observatory in Flagstaff in 1930 (by observatory newbie Clyde Tombaugh, following founder Percival Lowell’s 24-year-long hunt for the planet). 2. Speaking of space, Arizona boasts a particularly noteworthy meteorite … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Coming up at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. 2 hours of amazing music hosted live by a farker [Spiffy]
[link] [361 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About California
1. California joined the United States with the signing of the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, which ended the Mexican-American War, in 1848. The U.S. paid Mexico $15 million for war damages. In turn, Mexico ceded nearly half of its territory, including California, Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, and parts of Colorado, Nevada, and Utah. California officially became a state (the 31st) … [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Alaska
1. Alaska is the least densely populated state in the union, which makes sense when you consider that it is both the largest and the fourth-least populated. If New York City had the same population density as Alaska, only 28 people would be living in Manhattan. 2. Diomede, a city on Little Diomede Island in the Bering Strait off … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Aeromexico rides a little lower [Scary]
[link] [52 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 15 Things You Might Not Know About Alabama
1. Two Revolutionary War battles were fought in Mobile, Alabama (which was called West Florida at the time). The first was the 1780 Battle of Fort Charlotte, during which Spanish supporters of colonial independence attacked and seized a British Fort near Mobile. The second standoff, known as the Battle of Mobile, occurred a year later when the British attempted to … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Getting in drunken bar fights and being beaten by the local cops is no way to go through life. ESPECIALLY, if you're a Highway Patrol officer [Fail]
[link] [43 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » New study finds that birds and bees may suffer long-term consequences due to pesticides, marriage [Interesting]
[link] [41 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Seventeen-year-old "Good child" arrested for raping 69 year old male jogger. "I know he didn't do it," his mother said. "He ain't a pedophile," another family member said [Obvious]
[link] [228 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bird-eating frogs hop east through Montana, threatening the last free state: North Dakota [PSA]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » When pulling off your daring heist of two PlayStation consoles from a Target that you broke into, you might want to have a better escape plan than just running into the woods behind the store [Florida]
[link] [14 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bad: You have a nasty car crash. Good: You manage to crawl out of the vehicle unharmed. Bad: Just to be run over by your own wife who rushed to the scene to help you [Fail]
[link] [40 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this diplomacy [Photoshop]
[link] [20 comments] [Link]
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