Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
Fark.com RSS » America has 4.7 million jobs available. Subby is still holding out for management [Spiffy]
[link] [153 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 11 Things You Won't See on Display at the Mütter Museum
On a cart in Anna Dhody’s office sits a small, innocuous box marked “caramel Danish rolls.” Open it up, though, and you won’t find a pastry; instead, there’s a human skull nestled inside. Nearby, there’s another cardboard box—this one labeled “brain slices”—and on the bookshelf sits a jar of dried human skin. The presence of these items might seem pretty … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The good news: US prepares for global warming. The bad news: By coming up with euphemisms for it [Stupid]
[link] [103 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Easiest way to learn Mandarin Chinese: coma [Unlikely]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 8 Antarctic Traditions
While we are looking forward to autumn leaves and apple cider, Antarctica is undergoing the annual spring influx of workers for the summer. The few who stay all through the dark Antarctic winter welcome those who will swell the continent’s population for the next few months. There will be no spring flowers, no local graduations, and no autumn leaves at … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » City councilor signs petition to recall mayor. Mayor takes councilor for a late night drive, pulls a gun, and asks if he really meant to sign the petition [Scary]
[link] [60 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Suck it up son, just because you live six feet too close to school to ride on the bus and have to walk 40 minutes instead. Why in my day we had to walk 2 miles up hill… both ways [Stupid]
[link] [131 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Encounter
We had a dark grey cat (Norfolk bred, very Norfolk in character) called Tom. He was reserved, domineering, voluptuous — much as I imagine Tiber to be. When he was middle-aged he gave up nocturnal prowlings and slept on my bed, against my feet. One evening I was reading in bed when I became aware that Tom was staring at … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Excessive rain turns barley crop into domestic beer [Sad]
[link] [14 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Man arrested for eating a rare turtle. I guess you're supposed to cook them well done [Weird]
[link] [45 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Sweet Trivia
Pure Imagination Here are some things you didn’t know about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. * Wipe Them Out This short animated film is really well done, and has a fantastic ending. * Finish Him! This past weekend, a player for the Pittsburgh Steelers accidentally kicked the Cleveland Browns punter in the face. So, naturally, the internet spliced it together … [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I chatted to a nice guy and gave him my number. I told him I was going to sleep because I had a headache, and then put my phone on silent. He rang multiple times, and when I obviously didn't pick up, he sent several texts insulting me and calling me gutless for not responding. FML [Link]
FMyLife » nomfuck says FML
Today, I overcame my debilitating seasickness long enough to have a shower and take a breath of fresh air on the cruise ship balcony. Then as a reward, a passing seagull shat on my head. FML [Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Olive Garden's 7-Week ‘Never Ending Pasta Passes’ Sell Out In 45 Minutes
After Olive Garden announced it would sell a limited number of $100 “Never Ending Pasta Passes,” giving customers an unlimited supply of pasta, breadsticks, and Coca-Cola-branded soft drinks for 49 days, the promotion sold out within 45 minute…
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Canada announces they have found ship that went missing in the Arctic 160 years ago. Immediately put in charge of hunt for flight MH370 [Cool]
[link] [97 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Crazed, naked and Australian is no way to go through with a carjacking, son. Actually, add 'hog-tied' to that [Strange]
[link] [24 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Tennis Match: ready… set… go [Photoshop]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Launch Of A Newfangled, High-Tech Watch — In 1973
Today, Apple is releasing a new entrant to their product line: a watch. As with any Apple unveiling, the business press has been whipped into a frenzy. Will it dominate the watch market like the iPhone conquered its own? Will it put Switzerland out of business? Will it tell time? In 1973, a watch that used radically advanced technology was … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Is there anything cuter than underwater puppies? [Amusing]
[link] [63 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » It's not delivery, it's totally inept usage of social media [Fail]
[link] [104 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » One hundred onions stolen from 5th-grade students. This will all end in tears [Misc]
[link] [37 comments] [Link]
The Onion » John Harbaugh: 'It's Hard To Watch Disturbing Footage Of Our Loss To The Bengals'
John Harbaugh: 'It's Hard To Watch Disturbing Footage Of Our Loss To The Bengals'
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » WTFark takes on the mystery of the dark wanderer. Is it Death? No, it is simply a dark and robed figure, who is here to educate us on the wisdom of…Buffy the Vampire Slayer? [Weird]
[link] [47 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Always having problems storing your epic loot? This might be the solution [Plug]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
The Onion » 3-Day Waiting Period Leads To Far More Feasible Murder Plot
MASON CITY, IA—Saying that the past 72 hours offered him plenty of time to pause and reflect, local man Andrew Boyle told reporters Tuesday that the state’s three-day waiting period to purchase a handgun had allowed him to devise a far more pr…
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Liberals outraged that American children don't eat French food [Stupid]
[link] [195 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Conceptually for sale: Distinctive seaside property with spectacular coastal views. Would suit high-value buyer untroubled by vertigo or fond of crapping themselves on an hourly basis [Scary]
[link] [75 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Today in badly worded headlines: Road rage leads police to murder victim's boyfriend [Scary]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Dutch accident investigation says MH17 flight was normal until objects "pierced the plane at high velocity" [Followup]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Scientists Seek Perfect Pizza Cheese Blend
In theory, pizza is easy to make. Throw some sauce and cheese on some dough, make it hot and voila. The innumerable lousy slices out there in the world, though, suggest that pizza’s also really easy to easy to screw up. [Link]
The Onion » Infographic: Features Of The New Apple Watch
Tim Cook announced Tuesday the release of Apple’s long-rumored watch, the latest in wearable technology.
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » "I just flew in from ISIS controlled Iraq, and boy are my arms tired." *Badoom-tish* "Take my wives, please." *Badoom-tish* " Remember, try the hummus, and I'll be here all week unless I get martyred" [Interesting]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The latest stupid and dangerous teen challenge? The 'Fugitive Game' [Scary]
[link] [101 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » ♫ Get your motor runnin'….. ♫ [Florida]
[link] [55 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Apple Releases Brief, Fleeting Moment Of Excitement
CUPERTINO, CA—Ending weeks of anticipation and intense speculation, tech giant Apple unveiled a short and fleeting moment of excitement to the general public Tuesday during a media event at its corporate headquarters.
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » When sleepwalking, walking around the house is one thing but if you're a sleepwalker who likes to go camping maybe you want to tie a rope around your leg before you walk off a cliff [Scary]
[link] [45 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » 13-year-old DC girl is a child piano prodigy who has won prestigious music competitions all over the world, but since she's had to miss ten days of school to travel to these competitions and perform, according to the DC Public Schools, she's
[link] [186 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Legality of interracial couple's marriage questioned in VA. No, this is not a repeat from 1967 [Interesting]
[link] [84 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Slideshow: The Onion’s University Rankings
The Onion’s University Rankings
[Link]
The Onion » Onion Poll: Are You Planning To Buy The iPhone 6?
The Onion – America's Finest News Source
[Link]
Mental Floss » Brain Game: Strum Away
Today's mentalfloss.com Tuesday Test Time Brain Game asks you to break down an eight-letter word, one letter at a time, forming new words along the way. Good luck! By removing one letter from the mix at each step,
and rearranging the remaining letters to form new words,
reduce the word "PLECTRUM" to the letter "E." P L E C T R … [Link]
Mental Floss » 30 Old (And Useful) Slang Names For Parts of the Body
People have been using belly button to mean “navel” since the late 1800s. Your nose has been your schnozz since the 1940s, and your hooter since the '50s. Booty has been dated back as far as 1928. Guys have been comparing their guns since 1973, and their pecs since 1949. But slang names for parts of the body don’t end … [Link]
Mental Floss » 5 Questions: Perry Mason
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you're in Baltimore and find yourself in possession of a Ray Rice jersey, instead of setting fire to it like you should, you can give it to Hersh's Pizza, who will give you free food in return [Cool]
[link] [121 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Everything you always wanted to know about Scottish independence but couldn't be bothered to ask [Interesting]
[link] [123 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » How to Put a Ship Into a Bottle
While it's possible to build a model ship inside a bottle, the process is unbelievably difficult. [Link]
The Onion » NFL Announces New Zero-Tolerance Policy On Videotaped Domestic Violence
NEW YORK—Following public outcry over his mishandling of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice’s aggravated assault of his then-fiancée, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell announced Tuesday that the league has adopted a new zero-tolerance …
[Link]
The Onion » Doctor Has Troubling Amount Of Available Appointment Slots
SALINAS, CA—While scheduling a checkup at his primary care provider’s office, local resident Max Holden was reportedly left deeply unsettled Tuesday by the sheer number of available appointment slots on general practitioner Albert Corliss…
[Link]
The Onion » American Voices: Study: Popular Diets Pretty Much Equally Effective For Losing Weight
A new study has found that while low-carb and low-fat diets are often pitted against one other as the better way to lose weight, there isn’t a dramatic difference in results between the two, with both proving effective as long as the person sticks t…
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Remember Tamagotchis? They taught you about responsibility. They taught you about friendship. But most importantly, they taught you friends don't leave friends in rooms filled with their own feces. Now, Tamagotchi is back – and it is still h
[link] [53 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » ISIS is paying $50,000 for the identity of any American entering Syria [Scary]
[link] [142 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Millennials are the worst generation in the history of the United States" because only one of the author's nephews knows who Ace Frehley is [Stupid]
[link] [212 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » So what was it that brought Malaysia Airlines Flight 17 down? A missile or was it aliens? It could have been aliens you know [Followup]
[link] [33 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The obvious answer is "everything" [Obvious]
[link] [66 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Slideshow: Apple Through The Years
Apple Through The Years
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » One person in 20 is having an affair with a neighbor [Interesting]
[link] [139 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Who among us hasn't thought about the merits of getting a face tattoo? But this is too much [Followup]
[link] [54 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » If you live in Atlanta and are anywhere close to the CDC Medical Center, you might want to seriously start considering moving somewhere safer. Like Detroit [Followup]
[link] [117 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Facebook to use animated dinosaur to help users adjust privacy settings, because nobody would click to get rid of Barney [Stupid]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Who Gets The Royalties for 'Mein Kampf'?
Mein Kampf is one of the most controversial books ever sold. Written in prison by Adolf Hitler following his failed 1923 Beer Hall Putsch, the two-volume autobiography/rambling screed outlines his anti-Semitic worldview and the political reasoning that would eventually fuel the Third Reich. Mein Kampf is still printed and it is readily available in American libraries and bookstores, which raises … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » How to spot a narcissist. Wasn't this a great headline? I think only I could come up with it. What would Fark do without me and my headlines? [Interesting]
[link] [57 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The liquor laws in New Albany, Indiana, state that an establishment that sells liquor by the drink must also serve food. Here's how one bar complied, even though they don't want to cook [Amusing]
[link] [108 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Over their lifetime the average person spends an entire year nursing a hangover. Pfft. Amateurs [Obvious]
[link] [39 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Bank Of America Introduces New $50 Underdraft Fee
CHARLOTTE, NC—Saying the penalty will cover the costs incurred by the financial institution whenever a customer makes a withdrawal that results in a positive account balance, Bank of America introduced a new $50 underdraft fee Tuesday on all checkin…
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Some of the most surreal and bizarre landscape photos taken by a Swedish artist you'll see all day [Cool]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
The Onion » Your Horoscopes — Week Of September 9, 2014
ARIES You'll have yet another disastrous first date when you get something stuck between your front teeth and a crosstown.
[Link]
Futility Closet » A Magic Jigsaw
Image: Wikimedia Commons A “self-interlocking” geomagic square by Lee Sallows. The 16 lettered pieces pave a single large square, and smaller squares can be produced by various groups of four pieces — those drawn from each row, column, and long diagonal, and 10 other symmetrically chosen quartets. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Indigenous tribe in Amazon, tired of waiting on Brazilian government to take on illegal loggers, take matters into their own hands. Round up loggers, beat them with sticks, confiscate weapons, burn equipment and steal their pants. w/pics [Hero]
[link] [141 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Apple Live Event Thread? Why not. All the speculation, promises of wallet gutting and "INSTALL LINUX" will be right here at 10AM PST/1PM EST. LGT Apple's live stream page [Interesting]
[link] [634 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Russian aircraft flies over Canadian warship. In related news, Canada has a warship [Interesting]
[link] [71 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Three reasons never to use the term "friendzone." Also, calling that stupid hat a "trilby" doesn't make it look less like a fedora [Interesting]
[link] [428 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop Challenge: Finish the unfinished sketch [Photoshop]
[link] [15 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Megachurch to close after pastor refers to women as "penis homes." Don't worry, it gets worse [Dumbass]
[link] [663 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » How to kiss a girl
Whatever you do, don't kiss a girl unless she uses Listerated Pepsin Gum, the chewing gum that makes it safe to kiss!
[Link]
Mental Floss » Perry Mason
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » I'll see you down in Arizona Bay [Weird]
[link] [77 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Sponge Bob has to realize that he has a code of ethics and conduct that he has to adhere to" [Followup]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » A Case for Beer
The 60s: when the menace of beer was apparently worse than heroin.
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » 83-year-old New Jersey driver doesn't let anything stop him. Including the mall [Obvious]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit,' the Early Years
Watch footage from Disney’s early Who Framed Roger Rabbit attempt starring Paul Reubens. This was before Michael Eisner and Steven Spielberg got involved with the project.
*
What do you do if you’re a dog with two broken legs in casts? This scrappy little dog immediately learned to walk on two feet so she could get around.
*
In 1968, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Poodle hair, a mullet and Romulan eyebrows in this week's Mug Shot Roundup [Strange]
[link] [68 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » notyourfriend says FML
Today, my horrible boss sent me a Facebook friend request for the fifth time, in her attempt to not only bother me at work, but also through social media. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hoarder in tiny apartment leaves fortune to whomever can find his last will [Strange]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Air Marshal assaulted on flight from Nigeria; someone stabbed him with a syringe filled with an "unknown substance." FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T LET HIM LAND [Scary]
[link] [83 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » In a Word
Image: Wikimedia Commons greenswardsmanship
n. the cultivation of an unusually and enviably excellent lawn [Link]
Mental Floss » What Would Happen If You Stopped Dreaming?
Something to think about while you're drifting off to sleep tonight. Madagascar's locust problem is getting out of hand, and the pictures are terrifying. * Fredkin's Paradox explains why the most difficult choices in life are often the most insignificant ones; sadly, it doesn't explain how to avoid agonizing over something as meaningless as ordering the chicken or the fish. … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Viewing porn on company laptop [√], 2.5K worth of sexline calls on company mobile [√], derogatory texts about women [√], fired [ ] [Asinine]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Man in wheelchair who may have had pot hidden in prosthetic leg allegedly sets fire to wife [Sad]
[link] [25 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » I'm afraid that I have some bad news for those of you who raced out to pay $200 for an Amazon Fire Phone. Beyond the fact that you're using an Amazon Fire Phone, I mean [Fail]
[link] [164 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » After more than a week of everyone else knowing they were hacked, Home Depot says "Yeah we were hacked" [Followup]
[link] [57 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Regular roller coasters not scary enough for you? How about one that's ON FIRE? [Scary]
[link] [32 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Shore Is Weird
Karsten Sperling via Wikimedia Commons At the Beach Your summer wasn’t complete unless you visited a beach made of glass, or one of these other really odd and interesting beaches. * Credit Where Credit Is Due These thankless film jobs do appear in the credits, they’re just way, way down there. * Identifying the Killer Has the true identity of … [Link]
FMyLife » jkim says FML
Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML [Link]
The Onion » Puzzled Nation Can Remember Name Ferguson, But Not Sure From Where
WASHINGTON—Reportedly racking their brains in an attempt to figure out how they knew that name, a puzzled American populace admitted Monday that while they definitely remembered hearing the word Ferguson, they could not quite put their finger on whe…
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Car thief busted in stolen Ferrari at DUI checkpoint breaks into police impound yard to re-steal stolen Ferrari [Fail]
[link] [62 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this cupcake [Photoshop]
[link] [21 comments] [Link]
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