John Gordon Ross

A Man for All Reasons

John Gordon Ross header image 3

Whittle It a Little, It’ll Fit

Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”

Fark.com RSS » Signs you are dehydrated. "You are out of beer" surprisingly missing (dry slideshow) [Stupid]

Wednesday 18 June 23:55:00 UTC 2014

Stupid [link] [40 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "No, I do not want fries with that. Also, I'd like to run over your water meter, your shrubs and your menu board, and then try to bite all of you" [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 23:47:59 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Iraqi army finds its balls, beat off militants. First they were coming, now they're going [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 23:43:22 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » An unusually poignant photo gallery of the aging motels of Barstow, California will bring back memories of the kind of places your dad always made you stay when you took family vacations [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 23:35:06 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [102 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » shtidsfpa says FML

Wednesday 18 June 22:58:54 UTC 2014

Today, I only just found out that the abbreviation "lbs" is actually short for pounds. I've been saying "labs" my entire life. I'm 21. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 18 June 22:58:53 UTC 2014

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML [Link]

FMyLife » AgentRarity says FML

Wednesday 18 June 22:58:52 UTC 2014

Today, I was reading butthurt comments about how girl gamers can easily get dates and find love by simply existing. I'm a "girl gamer" who hasn't even found a date, let alone love. I've been looking since I was sixteen. I'm now 27. FML [Link]

Futility Closet » Unquote

Wednesday 18 June 22:52:03 UTC 2014

“Heresy is the side that loses.” — J.V. Fleming [Link]

Mental Floss » 8 Times Companies Faced Lawsuits for Their Slogans

Wednesday 18 June 22:43:29 UTC 2014

We combed through the news to pick a few favorites from the (somewhat) recent past. [Link]

Mental Floss » The Missing Links: Books Guaranteed to Make You Laugh

Wednesday 18 June 22:43:28 UTC 2014

Make 'Em Laugh Flavorwire has compiled a list of 25 books guaranteed to make you laugh. * Wanna Know How We Got This Movie? Check out seven things you didn’t know about The Dark Knight. * It Will Make You LOL The FBI maintains a glossary of internet slang that is woefully antiquated. The list will give you an E2EG, … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you're running late for your flight, don't pull a fire alarm at the airport to stop your plane from leaving without you. Or you can be like this idiot. Your call [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 22:41:39 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Jon Stewart doesn't always crush Donald Trump for being an insufferable blowhard, but when he does it's satisfying as hell [Hero]

Wednesday 18 June 22:36:37 UTC 2014

Hero [link] [196 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Mysterious Portrait Discovered Beneath Picasso Painting

Wednesday 18 June 22:30:00 UTC 2014

Using advanced infrared technology, art experts scanned the famous Picasso painting The Blue Room and discovered a hidden portrait underneath featuring a mysterious bow-tied man.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » "We really never expected all of this, to be honest, but God does blessings every day, That's the reason that little kitten just showed up here – because God knew we would do whatever we needed to do to make sure that kitten was safe" [Fl

Wednesday 18 June 22:19:14 UTC 2014

Florida [link] [63 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Georgia man discovers baby on highway. Skid marks reportedly everywhere [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 22:08:31 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [54 comments] [Link]

The Onion » American Voices: Thomas The Tank Engine Theme Park Announced

Wednesday 18 June 22:07:11 UTC 2014

Massachusetts heritage railroad site Edaville USA has announced that it will soon break ground on a theme park based on the children’s television series Thomas the Tank Engine.
[Link]

The Onion »  Who's Fucking: Zack and Evan

Wednesday 18 June 22:07:10 UTC 2014

Coworkers Zack and Evan talk about moving past first impressions, stepping out of your comfort zone, and understanding what it really means to fuck someone.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's nice to know your hard earned tax dollars are paying for cops to film themselves lip-synching Katy Perry songs and uploading them to the internet. "See…we really are no different from anyone else" [Asinine]

Wednesday 18 June 21:53:39 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [46 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » In North Carolina it is now legal to make a possum be your prank monkey [Cool]

Wednesday 18 June 21:51:53 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [19 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Residents of Georgia urged to be patient with Canada geese as hundreds of thousands of the squawking, crapping shiatbags invade the state for their annual June-July molt, during which time they can't fly and can't be shot [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 21:39:13 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [65 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 5 Crazy Things That Spiders Eat

Wednesday 18 June 21:30:53 UTC 2014

If you thought spiders only eat insects, think again. In recent years, scientists have discovered that small animals and other surprising food items are an important part of many spiders’ diets. [Link]

Mental Floss » Be Very Afraid! 25 Uncommon Phobias

Wednesday 18 June 21:22:44 UTC 2014

Have a fear of public speaking? You're in good company. A fear of bellybuttons? That's not quite so common. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » America's most cherished right is Freedom of Religion. Wait – you're not an evangelical Christian? Get the fark out of here [Asinine]

Wednesday 18 June 21:12:17 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [131 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Eight ways to make your morning more pleasant and productive. This list can't be right because it says nothing about drinking a bloody mary to take the edge off of the previous night's activities [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 21:07:49 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Archaeologists unearth ancient plague so deadly it has the potential to end human existence. Now they want to mess around with it for giggles [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 20:51:59 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Although described by his father as "indoorsy," 23-year-old manages to survived for days in the woods. Fark: He can't remember much after 'hanging out with some friends' [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 20:31:46 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [27 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 85-year-old grandma is evicted from her apartment. By maggots. That were eating a guy next door who had been dead for two weeks. Bonus: This is subby's grandmother [Sick]

Wednesday 18 June 20:31:07 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman graduates high school at 111-years-old. Hopefully won't go streaking to celebrate [Spiffy]

Wednesday 18 June 20:30:52 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [16 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » How a Deaf-Blind Person Watches the World Cup

Wednesday 18 June 20:30:00 UTC 2014

Brazilian Sign Language interpreter Hélio Fonseca de Araújo woke up on the day before the opening of the World Cup thinking about how he could help his friend Carlos, who is deaf and blind, get access to all the excitement. So he hit the hardware store, rigged up a tabletop model of the field, and enlisted his friend Regiane to … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Woman gives birth to twins six weeks apart, blames "incompetent cervix" [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 20:29:50 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Didn't think there was a European Ninja Festival? Think again [Cool]

Wednesday 18 June 20:25:39 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Cuba confims the first six cases of patients sickened by the Chikungunya virus. The reaction from public health officals worldwide was "Wait, that can't possibly be a real thing can it? I mean, c'mon 'Chikungunya'? Really?" [I

Wednesday 18 June 20:24:41 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Stephen Colbert was every USA soccer fan last night and it was perfect [Amusing]

Wednesday 18 June 20:20:42 UTC 2014

Amusing [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chicago is being plagued by murder memorials, and there are so many it's getting hard to navigate the sidewalks and streets on the South Side. Perhaps those memorials should be made illegal, solving the problem entirely [Unlikely]

Wednesday 18 June 20:14:10 UTC 2014

Unlikely [link] [70 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If your power went out last night near Seattle, this guy might be shockingly responsible. Also crispy [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 20:13:55 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you are one of the first thousand who can listen to an eccentric Chinese billionaire sing his own rendition of We Are The World, then you can get a free meal at a top New York restaurant [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 20:11:44 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [13 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop these hardcore players [Photoshop]

Wednesday 18 June 20:00:01 UTC 2014

Photoshop [link] [14 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Trailblazing Colleague Makes Historic Contact With People Who Work On Other Floor

Wednesday 18 June 20:00:00 UTC 2014

PITTSBURGH—In an unprecedented encounter with a culture heretofore shrouded in mystery, Northco Logistics customer service specialist Ryan Barlow reportedly established historic contact Wednesday with the people who work on his office complex’…
[Link]

The Onion » World Cup Stadium's Walls Reinforced With 10,000 Homeless Brazilians

Wednesday 18 June 20:00:00 UTC 2014

World Cup Stadium's Walls Reinforced With 10,000 Homeless Brazilians
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » A local news reporter doing a story about increased crime in Oakland gets her purse stolen from the news truck while she was on the air. Bonus: They were parked in front of the police station [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 19:53:01 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [39 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chaos in Iraq is worrying everyone except oil companies and the people who owns their stocks. They're rolling around in piles of money and snorting coke of hookers' asses [Obvious]

Wednesday 18 June 19:44:25 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [75 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » cheap says FML

Wednesday 18 June 19:38:10 UTC 2014

Today, I celebrated my 22nd birthday. On my cake stood last year's "21" candle, to which had been added a single candle. Clearly, times are tough. FML [Link]

FMyLife » hoopfrog says FML

Wednesday 18 June 19:38:09 UTC 2014

Today, my boyfriend's grandma took me to his house to hang out. I then heard her in the kitchen telling his mom how hard she tried to leave me at the nearest gas station. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Fitness instructor's $8,000 over-sized breasts explode. It happens sometimes. Boobies just blow up. Natural causes (Not safe for work photo of aftermath) [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 19:37:37 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man wearing zebra print hat, Superman tank top and Duck Dynasty beard saves some kayaker from angry beaver [Amusing]

Wednesday 18 June 19:32:17 UTC 2014

Amusing [link] [32 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Twelve-year-old kid says something you don't like while you are sitting near him at a restaurant? That's a choking, chasing and another choking. Bonus: Mother was drunk and refused to cooperate [Florida]

Wednesday 18 June 19:28:30 UTC 2014

Florida [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you've been shooting birds with blow gun darts in Virginia Beach: A: It's a federal crime and B: What the Fark is wrong with you? [Sick]

Wednesday 18 June 19:24:42 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Therapist arrestedafter reportof sexualassault [Obvious]

Wednesday 18 June 19:24:23 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [49 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Infographic: What Is ISIS?

Wednesday 18 June 19:10:00 UTC 2014

The Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, a formerly al-Qaeda–aligned organization known by the acronym ISIS, has been seizing cities in Iraq, carrying out mass killings, and marching toward Baghdad.
[Link]

The Onion »  Who's Fucking: Isaac and Doris

Wednesday 18 June 19:00:00 UTC 2014

Isaac and Doris first met 55 years ago and they've fucked each and every day since.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » What's worse than having an abandoned house next door? Having bees make a colony in the abandoned house. What's worse than that? You can't track down the owner, so there's nothing you can legally do to get rid of the bees [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 18:45:35 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [105 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Study: More Men Opting To Be In Room When Wife Conceives Baby

Wednesday 18 June 18:40:32 UTC 2014

PHILADELPHIA—According to a study published this week in the American Journal Of Obstetrics And Gynecology, an increasing number of men are choosing to be physically present while conceiving a child with their wives or partners. “What w…
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » You might want to sit down for this, but it kinda looks like twitter hashtags aren't really doing much to stop sexual assault [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 18:35:03 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [233 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » El Paso police officer caught on video shooting a handcuffed prisoner, and to nobody's surprise, gets away with it [Obvious]

Wednesday 18 June 18:32:26 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [125 comments] [Link]

The Onion »  Who's Fucking: Josh and Debra

Wednesday 18 June 18:30:00 UTC 2014

Josh and Debra tell the remarkable story of how they first met, fell in love, and started fucking.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » A fake distress call to the Coast Guard is an ineffective – and expensive – way to get back at your ex-boyfriend [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 18:18:48 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Largest Video Game Collection on Earth Sells for $750,000

Wednesday 18 June 17:38:26 UTC 2014

Michael Thomasson's collection of over 11,000 games sold at auction for three-quarters of a million dollars to someone using the pseudonym "peeps_10091970." [Link]

Mental Floss » Extinct Snakes Lead to Better Fakes

Wednesday 18 June 17:30:44 UTC 2014

In North Carolina, a scientist finds snakes dressed as their long-gone neighbors. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Hank Williams III blasts Tom Hiddleston's casting as Hank Williams, says "only an American should play my granddaddy." How shocking; he's a racist [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 17:25:05 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [293 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 10 Dangerous Ways to Amuse Yourself from an 1820 Book

Wednesday 18 June 17:15:15 UTC 2014

The second edition of Endless Amusement, published in 1820, promises “nearly 400 entertaining experiments in various branches of science.” [Link]

Mental Floss » Why Betamax Lost to VHS

Wednesday 18 June 17:11:39 UTC 2014

In the late 1970s and early 1980s, the battle for the home video market was just beginning. The biggest contenders were Betamax, format made by Sony, and VHS, made by JVC. Although in many ways the Betamax was considered a superior format, VHS won…but why? In this short video, Bill Hammack ("the Engineer Guy") gives us his take: This is … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Leave it to advertising executives to try and improve the lives of Colombian peasants by giving them their own off-grid refrigerators designed to keep their Coca-Colas cold [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 17:10:54 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [37 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Remember that 1953 movie, "Invaders From Mars"? Yeah, well about that [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 17:09:58 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [74 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Why video games are meant to be played at your house with friends and not online with strangers. For you hardcore gamers, 'friends' are complicated NPCs with whom you can interact over long periods of time, engaging in barter and missions [Ob

Wednesday 18 June 17:08:00 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [95 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » How come ISIS has swept across northern Iraq with such ease? It could be down to the insane levels of corruption in Iraq, from the top down, and its ineffective parliament. Iraq was a failed state way before the ISIS rampage [Sad]

Wednesday 18 June 17:07:44 UTC 2014

Sad [link] [113 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » How come discovering a crazy, naked woman hiding in your closet always seems to end so much better in an adult movie? [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 17:05:31 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [26 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Man Unaware All His Friends Think Of Him When They Want To Put Things Into Perspective

Wednesday 18 June 17:00:00 UTC 2014

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—Friends and coworkers of local man Alan Tessler confirmed Wednesday that whenever they feel discouraged or depressed, they need only think of their 36-year-old acquaintance to put everything back into perspective, a fact to which T…
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Maine Goths fly kites. Like anyone cares [Obvious]

Wednesday 18 June 16:51:18 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Naked sunbather causes massive traffic accident in Austria after drivers become fixated on her amazing, amazing ass. " "I thought I was suffering sunstroke when I saw it," explains one driver (SFW pic of said ass) [Amusing]

Wednesday 18 June 16:45:48 UTC 2014

Amusing [link] [72 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Yes, Mr. Jones, about the potential sale of your $2 million oceanfront home – it was built on public park land. Surprise [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 16:44:05 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A Hispanic man named José Padilla who owns a taco shop stands his ground to defend his restaurant, and is promptly shot 10 times. LAPD are looking for "three black men who are driving a vehicle." C'mon, which of you guys wrote this a

Wednesday 18 June 16:41:12 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [66 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canada to test rarely used criminal code provision that bans pedobear memes [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 16:40:10 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [23 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 29 Weird Museums Preserving Our History

Wednesday 18 June 16:27:50 UTC 2014

From burnt food to PEZ memorabilia, there's a museum for everything. Start planning your summer roadtrip immediately. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man gives everyone on the plane a flower to give to his girlfriend who's waiting inside the terminal at the airport. They pour out of the plane one-by-one and give her a flower each, then he comes out and gets on his knee and proposes. Ta Da [Sap

Wednesday 18 June 16:25:15 UTC 2014

Sappy [link] [87 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "Three amateurs appear destined to become 'world's dumbest criminal' candidates after deciding that holding up a gun shop with a fake firearm was a great idea" [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 16:22:55 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [29 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Having learned nothing from every Dracula movie ever made, researchers want to dig up Vlad the Impaler's tomb in Naples, Italy [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 16:21:29 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Canada is still pissed-off at Iran, and of all the countries you don't want pissed-off at you, it's Canada [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 16:21:16 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Man threatened CVS with hydrogen bombs demanding prepaid money cards [Asinine]

Wednesday 18 June 16:16:22 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [27 comments] [Link]

The Onion » Infographic: Tips For The Perfect Cruise

Wednesday 18 June 16:15:00 UTC 2014

Summer is a popular time of year for cruises, with everyone from singles and families to veteran passengers and honeymooners hitting the high seas on luxury liners to visit destinations around the world.
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Oh Noes, the FDA is coming for our salt with the sole intention of making all the food we eat blander. Hide it, hoard it [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 16:07:54 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [83 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The opposite of clickbait: Yes, your parents ARE having sex [Amusing]

Wednesday 18 June 16:05:46 UTC 2014

Amusing [link] [42 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Bear and cubs steal kids lunchboxes from kids day camp. Yogi & Boo-Boo described as bears of interest and wanted for questioning [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 16:02:27 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [10 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » The Most Interesting Comics of the Week

Wednesday 18 June 16:00:00 UTC 2014

This week's comics includes Witzend, The Wicked + The Divine, a new webcomic from Emily Carroll and the history of photobooths [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Slate: Here's how to improve education – make it harder to become a teacher. First of all, students entering teacher-education programs MUST be slightly above average, and there needs to be more bureaucratic hoop-jumping for credentials [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 15:59:43 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The most discriminatory law in the United States is the Family Cap, which used to put a limit on how big a non-white family could be but today puts a cap on how big a family on government assistance can be. Naturally, people have a problem with it [O

Wednesday 18 June 15:52:24 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [276 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Gang banger Jesus is gonna bust a cap in yo ass [Amusing]

Wednesday 18 June 15:40:09 UTC 2014

Amusing [link] [30 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » U.S. Patent and Trademark office finds the D.C. football team's name offensive and cancels the trademark. Now we're going to have to come up with a replacement for the name "Washington" [NewsFlash]

Wednesday 18 June 15:25:42 UTC 2014

NewsFlash [link] [749 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Brain Game: A Good Inning

Wednesday 18 June 15:24:18 UTC 2014

Can you solve the Word Ladder in today's mentalfloss.com Brain Game Wednesday Wordplay challenge in five steps or fewer? Prove it! By changing one letter in each step to form English words, and leaving all other letters in their original positions, convert FIVE into RUNS in the fewest possible steps. F I V E
_ _ _ _
_ _ _ …
[Link]

Fark.com RSS » A closer look at the very special breed of suburbanite who spends $160 a month to rent chickens [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 15:21:03 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [56 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » Charge!

Wednesday 18 June 14:48:16 UTC 2014

Horses are difficult to manage onstage, so in 1901 music hall performer Alexander Braatz invented this ingenious alternative. The actor’s own legs masquerade as those of his horse, and a system of levers and cords moves the hind legs as well. False human legs are attached at each side to give the appearance that the performer is mounted; his real … [Link]

Mental Floss » Where Does Teatime Come From?

Wednesday 18 June 14:30:00 UTC 2014

Few things are more British than afternoon tea. Despite the close association, the beverage was enjoyed for more than twenty years in France before it migrated across the English Channel. Tea-lightful Until the nineteenth century, British citizens ate two main meals — breakfast and dinner. Dinner wasn’t served until late evening, so most citizens went many hours between meals. Around … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The seven signs you're in a cult. I was going to make a joke, but the punch line was too long [PSA]

Wednesday 18 June 14:27:10 UTC 2014

PSA [link] [193 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Frenchman found guilty of ordering kidnapping of the guy who murdered his daughter. Thirty years ago. Liam Neeson nods in approval [Followup]

Wednesday 18 June 14:25:08 UTC 2014

Followup [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Chinese media warns citizens not to eat uninspected dog meat during annual summer solstice feasts. With photo of what uninspected dog meat might look like, so be warned [Sick]

Wednesday 18 June 14:02:13 UTC 2014

Sick [link] [91 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » 1km-tall skyscraper set for construction in China – looks like Disney World on steroids [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 14:00:39 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [58 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » An annual poll of scientists asking what are the most misused scientific terms by the public includes "proof," "theory," "learned versus innate" and "ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny" [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 13:50:58 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [85 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » Drink Water Now!

Wednesday 18 June 13:33:38 UTC 2014

Vittel has introduced a water bottle cap with a built-in timer. After an hour a little flag pops up on top of the cap, reminding you that it's now time to drink more water. Just in case you forgot. Apparently this is a problem for some people.

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Japan's parliament passes law which bans possession of child pornography but the 'Why Bother?' law excludes sexually explicit comics, animation, adults who look like kids, and computer graphics [Asinine]

Wednesday 18 June 13:30:52 UTC 2014

Asinine [link] [189 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this moonlight sky [Photoshop]

Wednesday 18 June 13:00:01 UTC 2014

Photoshop [link] [25 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Not news: A 72-year-old bay area man runs in the Dipsea race for the 44th consecutive year. News: And manages to finish. Fark: Despite having a heart attack [Spiffy]

Wednesday 18 June 12:35:05 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [20 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » a very unlucky dude. says FML

Wednesday 18 June 12:13:07 UTC 2014

Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Guards at amusement park tell family that they cannot bring their knives into the park. Father and his four kids decide the rules don't apply to them, and proceed to beat up responding officers. Have fun in jail, dumbasses [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 11:59:25 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [209 comments] [Link]

Weird Universe » The Cackle Sisters

Wednesday 18 June 11:36:28 UTC 2014

Listen to just the first three minutes at least of the Cackle Sisters, and then tell me if you don't agree that contemporary C&W music needs more bird imitations and yodeling. [Link]

Fark.com RSS » And you thought being made to wear matching family sweaters was bad [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 11:35:00 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [50 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » National Zoo to suddenly close their invertebrate exhibit in a spineless move [Sad]

Wednesday 18 June 11:05:00 UTC 2014

Sad [link] [36 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Only two things come from Texas, steers and HBO shows about Texas politics. I don't see any horns on you, boy [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 10:32:52 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [48 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Gordon

Wednesday 18 June 10:14:58 UTC 2014

[Link]

Fark.com RSS » Unemployed Millennial with student debt? Logging industry is always hiring. Just ask Dexter [Cool]

Wednesday 18 June 10:14:00 UTC 2014

Cool [link] [90 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Morning Cup of Links: Crazy World Cup Fans

Wednesday 18 June 10:00:50 UTC 2014

The 45 craziest fans at the World Cup. They’re cool as long as they aren’t sitting right in front of you.
*
Domino’s Pizza Develops Its Own Siri So You Never Have to Speak to a Human Again. It probably works cheaper than humans, too.
*
The Evolution of the Mental Hospital in Music Videos, From Björk and ‘N Sync to … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Turns out, everyone has rhythm. But that doesn't mean they won't dance like Elaine Benes in The Little Kicks [Interesting]

Wednesday 18 June 9:30:00 UTC 2014

Interesting [link] [28 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Nigerian World Cup viewing center rocked by explosion. "Many" casualties reported [Scary]

Wednesday 18 June 7:04:59 UTC 2014

Scary [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Futility Closet » A Point of Law

Wednesday 18 June 6:46:46 UTC 2014

A gentleman, who had been described as a ‘Pettifogger,’ accused another gentleman, whom he had styled a ‘Fish-fag,’ with an assault. It being a very intricate point, it was of course referred to the Lord Mayor. It stood as follows: — ‘Whether puffing a cloud of tobacco-smoke in a man’s face constituted an assault?’ After some grave consultation with that … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Till Death Do Us Part' used to have something to do with marriage and a partner, these days in America it now has to do with you and your job [Sad]

Wednesday 18 June 6:43:45 UTC 2014

Sad [link] [136 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » Carlee_Casten says FML

Wednesday 18 June 5:21:25 UTC 2014

Today, I got called a slut. I don't know what is worse, the fact I was called it or that I felt strangely flattered that the person thought I was getting any. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » It's important to be able to distinguish an opossum from a porcupine – especially if you intend on slapping it [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 4:57:00 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [64 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » ifeelfat says FML

Wednesday 18 June 4:31:22 UTC 2014

Today, while at the waterpark, some guy came up to me and profusely thanked me for wearing a one-piece swimsuit. FML [Link]

FMyLife » Anonymous says FML

Wednesday 18 June 4:31:19 UTC 2014

Today, I almost got written up for insubordination by my boss. All I did was explain to him that I couldn't help a tourist out because I speak Japanese, not Korean, and that it's not in fact "the same Asian shit" as he seemed to think. FML [Link]

FMyLife » the lannisters send their retards says FML

Wednesday 18 June 4:30:55 UTC 2014

Today, my coworker was telling me about his mom, when he asked about mine. I told him that I've never met my mom, because she died during my childbirth. It's a very painful subject for me, but all the same, my coworkers have decided they'll now only address me as "Tyrion". FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Today's non-story news story: Roller coaster briefly stops while going up a lift hill [Silly]

Wednesday 18 June 4:24:31 UTC 2014

Silly [link] [35 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » 7 Scientific Solutions for Annoying Little Problems

Wednesday 18 June 4:12:08 UTC 2014

Scientists are working to alleviate those maddening, irritating, altogether obnoxious things that can make your everyday life hell. And not a moment too soon! [Link]

Mental Floss » The Origins of 6 Odd Canadian Place Names

Wednesday 18 June 4:12:07 UTC 2014

Last year, I posted Origins of 8 of the Strangest Place Names in Canada. You had a lot more suggestions for odd place names in Canada, so I looked up quite a few. Many of the communities have names that aren’t even considered odd to the residents, and no one knows how they originated. Or if they do, it’s not … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » News: People are shocked, SHOCKED that a doctor would mislead them by promoting medications that would help people lose weight, but didn't. Fark: This 'doctor' is Dr. Oz [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 3:32:15 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [157 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Former realtor charged with several counts of fraud and one count of proving the old adage "The more someone talks about God during a business deal, the tighter you need to hold on to your wallet" [Obvious]

Wednesday 18 June 3:19:05 UTC 2014

Obvious [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Ugly-ass cheetah cub rejected by mother becomes best friends with puppy. The cuteness here will leak out of your monitor and make a puddle of wonderful on your desk [Sappy]

Wednesday 18 June 2:54:18 UTC 2014

Sappy [link] [34 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » This is a story about a love affair between a tacky pink plastic flamingo and the lemurs at the San Francisco Zoo [Spiffy]

Wednesday 18 June 2:52:49 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [21 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » A tiny portion of Detroit is making a comeback, featuring bars, boutiques, and a distillery. Why yes, hipsters are involved, why do you ask? [Spiffy]

Wednesday 18 June 2:52:00 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [57 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Dallas area 7-11 stores offer preview of what will soon be Colorado's number one selling item: Doritos Loaded, which are textured triangles filled with warm, melted cheese. SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY [Spiffy]

Wednesday 18 June 2:34:55 UTC 2014

Spiffy [link] [55 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Potential major advance in modern dentistry coming out of the UK [Unlikely]

Wednesday 18 June 2:19:53 UTC 2014

Unlikely [link] [38 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Detroit man attempts to throw over a prison yard fence a football filled with narcotics and cell phones. The pass was incomplete [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 2:15:41 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [41 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you're going to throw a party where you reveal the gender of your unborn child to all your family and friends, you should do it like they do it in the South and fire off shotgun shells loaded with glitter and confetti [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 1:45:14 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [55 comments] [Link]

FMyLife » luckycharmed says FML

Wednesday 18 June 1:34:05 UTC 2014

Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML [Link]

Fark.com RSS » "The suspect also ate several hot dogs and rice cakes before departing" [Strange]

Wednesday 18 June 1:30:30 UTC 2014

Strange [link] [15 comments] [Link]

Mental Floss » Hyperrealistic Sculptures of Everyday Objects

Wednesday 18 June 1:30:02 UTC 2014

Robin Antar is a Brooklyn artist who creates oversized replicas of American staples out of stone. Despite being made out of marble and other inedible materials, her statues looks good enough to eat! Antar's creations are currently being displayed at The Waterfall Gallery & Mansion in NYC, June 12 through August 31, 2014. "My passion for sculpting is expressed in … [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you find out that you bought a dog that was given away without a soldier's knowledge while he was deployed, should you: a) give it back to him, b) sell it back to him, or c) ignore his pleas and keep it? [Sad]

Wednesday 18 June 1:17:01 UTC 2014

Sad [link] [177 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » If you rob five banks in one day and end up with less than $450 for your efforts, perhaps you should consider a different line of work [Fail]

Wednesday 18 June 1:03:22 UTC 2014

Fail [link] [31 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » The CEO of Exxon-Mobil isn't going to let a little thing like patriotism or a direct request from the United States government stop him from travelling to Moscow and doing business deals with people the US has imposed sanctions on [Dumbass]

Wednesday 18 June 0:59:03 UTC 2014

Dumbass [link] [82 comments] [Link]

Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this trendy conference room [Photoshop]

Wednesday 18 June 0:00:01 UTC 2014

Photoshop [link] [13 comments] [Link]

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