Odds and sods I look at regularly, just because they amuse me. I hope they do the same for you. Incidentally, I found this page’s title on Greg Ross’s Futility Closet (it’s somewhere on this page) in a mini-article which also includes the delightful sentence in Icelandic: Barbara Ara bar Ara araba bara rabbabara. Ross points out that this, “besides being fun to say, is spelled with only three letters. It means “Barbara, daughter of Ari, brought only rhubarb to Ari the Arab.”
FMyLife » furball says FML
Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, my brother got pantsed by his idiot friends. It was a surprise to everyone that he was wearing women's underwear at the time, but even more of a surprise for me that the underwear belonged to me. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Police save raccoon with peanut butter jar stuck on its head. Surprisingly, no bullets were used during the course of this rescue [Florida]
[link] [42 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » This just in: Summer is the worst time for teenage drivers [Florida]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman and her dog attacked by deer shocked that Oregon hippies aren't cool with (deer) population control: "Their first response was not, 'are you OK?' but that I should have known better and the deer must have fawns nearby" [Stra
[link] [121 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nobody's buying sausage pizza anymore in NYC. The sausage slice has been replaced by buffalo chicken and pineapples, artichokes and ziti [Interesting]
[link] [143 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » From the "Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don't" department: bicyclist punched in the face for refusing to run a red light [Stupid]
[link] [112 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » US surpasses Russia as world's top oil and natural gas producer. Thanks Obama [Interesting]
[link] [98 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Bobby Jindal vetoes bill that would make it illegal to haul your dogs unrestrained at 70 miles per hour in the back of your truck [Interesting]
[link] [233 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » IT worker quits job so he can play a corpse for a living. Seems like a logical transition [Obvious]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this house starting kit [Photoshop]
[link] [22 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Superb animal has already should not abandon the garbage – cigarette buttocks in this area [Fail]
[link] [73 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » ToddlersWife says FML
Today, my husband and I got into an argument over him not brushing his teeth. It ended with him snapping his toothbrush in half. He's 52. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » County forced to move its morgue due to mold. It's not like it was bothering the corpses [Strange]
[link] [13 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The Civil War claims three more victims [Scary]
[link] [52 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Nobody would fall for that #EndFathersDay parody hashtag, right? Let's ask this Time columnist [Fail]
[link] [139 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » mydatinglifesucks says FML
Today, I had a date with a man who works as a psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder during dinner. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » His feet are off the ground, and he has finally reached the stars. Casey Kasem dies at 82 [NewsFlash]
[link] [266 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "Excuse me, we know that your 3 year old is recovering from a pit bull mauling, but…uh…her face is scaring customers, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave" [Asinine]
[link] [175 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Father’s Day Greetings
[Link]
Fark.com RSS » Research shows that throwing money down the toilet or buying sunscreen is pretty much the same thing [Interesting]
[link] [56 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis wants everyone to know that the Global Economy is about to come crashing down upon us [PSA]
[link] [110 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Who wants to bid on this historic farm? It was home to a haunted attraction and a sex club…wait, wait, WHAT? [Cool]
[link] [26 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Weekend Links: The Hottest New Sport: Futevolei
It's World Cup time again, but some Brazilians have taken their soccer skills off the field and to the beach for an intense new hybrid sport that looks a lot tougher than simple running and passing. * Not content with an off-the-rack dress, one high schooler hand-painted herself a recreation Van Gogh prom gown with incredible results. * Seattle native … [Link]
Mental Floss » Gulls Turn Cannibal on Sundays
Ah Sunday. The day of rest. A day for sleeping in, having a big brunch and watching bad action movies on basic cable. A day for murdering your own children and consuming their bodies. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Delaware celebrates their independence day, when they threw off the yoke of tyranny that is Pennsylvania [Followup]
[link] [35 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » The end of Fark is near [Spiffy]
[link] [130 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Pope Francis refuses to use the Popemobile, even though he knows that could make him the holeyist Pope ever [Interesting]
[link] [41 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » 28 Awesome Historical Photos of Dads
Happy Father's Day! [Link]
Weird Universe » How to pick-up women
Bryan "Double B" Barton of Sacramento teaches a class on how to pick-up women. In it, you'll learn lines such as these:
“Do you have something in your eye… oh wait, it’s just a sparkle.”
“You’re so beautiful you made me forget my pick-up line.”
“Are you a parking ticket? Because you got fine written all over you.”
There's also … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Cliff Notes of Tony Blair's tl;dr opinion on Iraq: because we didn't jump into Syria, not because the 2003 invasion was a shiat-stained farkup of a mistake [Asinine]
[link] [122 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Tomato truck overturns on I-8. Cleanup took quite a while, since procuring a truck full bacon and lettuce is a difficult task on a weekend [Interesting]
[link] [19 comments] [Link]
Mental Floss » Working in Tall Trees
Jim Meyers is an arborist: he works with trees. He also works in my hometown of Portland, Oregon, where we have an abundance of very tall firs. These trees have a nasty habit of dropping limbs; I should know, as I have three of them (80-footers) in my back yard, and during windstorms we get windfall in the form of … [Link]
FMyLife » ItsJustMe1616 says FML
Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this pipe puller [Photoshop]
[link] [12 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » Follies of the Madmen #221
Family lives in eerie black hole environment, stores floating possessions at many levels but without formal order.
Original ad here. [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Another school shooting rocks the nation. Well, substitute "Waffle House" for "school," and change "rocks the nation" to "surprises nobody" [Sad]
[link] [135 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Anaheim City Hall janitor arrested for hiding camera in women's restroom. Detectives described it as Mickey Mouse setup [Dumbass]
[link] [17 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » JetBlue denies a 3-year old child permission to use the restroom while the plane is stuck on the tarmac, and nature takes its course, anyway [Dumbass]
[link] [158 comments] [Link]
Weird Universe » News of the Weird (June 15, 2014)
News of the Weird
Weirdnuz.M375, June 15, 2014
Copyright 2014 by Chuck Shepherd. All rights reserved.
Lead Story
Thirty thousand spiders led by members of the British Tarantula Society gathered in Coventry on May 18th for the annual BTS exhibition, with a “Socotra Island blue baboon” spider taking “Best in Show” for first-time entrant Mike Dawkins. According to news reports, … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Hospice patient was former forest ranger, but hasn't been able to go outside for several years, because of his illness. Firefighters decide to take him on one last hike in the forest. Dust, dust… it's everywhere [Sappy]
[link] [34 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Good news, ladies living in Alaska. You can now get free pregnancy tests in bar bathrooms, the same place you can get condoms, cigarettes, tampons, before and after mints, edible underwear, fake tattoos and in some cases dinner [Strange]
[link] [27 comments] [Link]
Futility Closet » Milestones
A conundrum by French puzzle maven Pierre Berloquin: Caroline leaves town driving at a constant speed. After some time she passes a milestone displaying a two-digit number. An hour later she passes a milestone displaying the same two digits but in reverse order. In another hour she passes a third milestone with the same two digits (in some order) separated … [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "…schools have tried to avoid the ambiguity by mandating that students get explicit verbal permission before making any sexual advance…The only way around the rule is if students have a prior verbal agreement to use a pre-arranged hand signal
[link] [192 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » To be fair, no one would expect a submarine base in Idaho [Interesting]
[link] [44 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Coming up at the top of the hour, it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. 2 hours of music on public radio from Juneau, Alaska, hosted by a farker [Spiffy]
[link] [300 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » (checks date) Seven Years Running. What would you say to your Dad today if you could? [Hero]
[link] [322 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Why Malaysia Flight MH370 will never officially be declared lost. CNN executives seen popping open champagne bottles [Obvious]
[link] [28 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Mormon jihad? Oregon school shooter was 'devout Mormon' who wanted to kill 'sinners' who 'smoked cigarettes and took the Lord's name in vain' [Scary]
[link] [134 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Woman is admitted to the hospital to have her ovaries removed, comes out with a 32-week-old baby [Strange]
[link] [29 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Baghdad Bob's replacement would like you to know that everything is normal and there's nothing to see here [Followup]
[link] [49 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Dog falls 16 stories and survives. That's the equivalent of a human falling 112 stories [Florida]
[link] [30 comments] [Link]
FMyLife » Anonymous says FML
Today, I was using my phone while in a crowded waiting room, and I accidentally tapped on a YouTube video with the volume still at maximum. The first words everyone heard? "Fuck her right in the pussy!" FML [Link]
Fark.com RSS » "If homeowners discover a bee or wasp nest in their house, we would urge them to get it inspected and removed by a professional. Starting fires is not an effective way to clear these nests and we would encourage people not to do this" [Dumbas
[link] [47 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » So, apparently there's a "Sandwich Generation" [Strange]
[link] [81 comments] [Link]
Fark.com RSS » Photoshop this 83-year-old man working out [Photoshop]
[link] [23 comments] [Link]
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